okay, but i’m starting to think that lance’s story arc will be a big one. Because all of his insecurities are kind of piling up and adding up for season 3.
because in season 1 he had first showed that he was homesick, and that was a big deal at the time he was kind of the only one who really expressed that they wanted to go home really badly. He almost cried.
and then this season kinda heightened that.
first when he is with the mermaids they tell him he is their saviour and he doesn’t even believe them
he questions them and looks distraught like he can’t even believe they would see him as someone who could save them by himself.
and even here it gets worse, he clearly doesn’t see the worth that he has and it shocks him and even frightens him to meet people who think he can help and actually do things
THEN he thinks that Keith is trying to steal his lion, and is extra dramatic and even tells Keith that him and blue are happy together, and that i think was him being afraid of being replaced.
face mask and towel aside lance is almost hostile here he is clearly upset
then… he gets really upset that shiro chooses to take kieth on a mission over him.
in this scene he is clearly upset and his expression is almost sad at first when shiro chooses keith and he fights shiro on it despite how he has always seen him as a leader who knew what was best
he clearly just wants to be appreciated, and acknowledged by shiro and the rest of the team as a strong member and even if they do he clearly doesn’t see it
AND FINALLY TO TOP IT ALL OFF
THIS LOVELY SCENE RIGHT HERE
HE LITERALLY HAD JUST BOASTED ABOUT THE WHOLE TEAM, EVEN KEITH BUT HE REALLY DOESNT HAVE MUCH TO SAY ABOUT HIMSELF
HE EVEN WONDERS IF THE TEAM WOULD KEEP HIM AROUND IF HE WASN’T USEFUL, SO CLEARLY HE HAS ISSUES ACCEPTING HIS WORTH
so while yeah lance didn’t have much of a roll in this season there is alot of hope for next season. this is clearly a buildup, because as the seasons progress it’s getting worse, and that means that this may even start to effect the team.
when lance does get his full fledged character arch like keith did this season and shiro it will be very large and i think it will be very interesting to see how this pans out. LANCE WILL GET THE LIME LIGHT HE DESERVES AND I THINK THATS SOMETHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO!!
Since when were you a fucking Muslim? I'm sorry, but that's gross...
Well, it all began when I was 12. I was happy as happy could be. I was a blonde hair, blue eyed Christian white girl, who was 12% Dutch 25% German 6% Bullshit 19% Inncorectly Pronounced Nation and 9% Mayflower™ (((((with .00002% Native American, so I was part minority. Check your privilege)))))
I lived in a 1200 Square foot bungalow in The Suburbs™, fully equipped with a white picket fence and lawn care services from True Green™. I had a mom who spent 95% of her time wearing mom jeans and baking box brownies for the PTA meetings. I had a dad who called out “honey I’m home!” Every time he came back from his sad, cubicle, 9 to 5 job at a rundown office downtown. I had a little brother, he pissed me off, you know, flushed my makeup down the toilet, read my diary, said stupid things, ugh, what a tragedy. I had a golden retriever, too.
Then one day when I was 13, July 15th, if I remember correctly, I didn’t eat all day. Little did I know, it was Ramadan! Like a magical storm, a wind gust upon my pasty body, ripping my Bible™ right out of my hands and replacing it with a Quran. I was scared, afraid, as my thin, blonde hair was being replaced with thick, brown Mediterranean locks. My pasty skin grew darker, my high pitched valley girl voice transforming into a deeper, more subtile accent. Henna tattoos began to cascade down my arms. I was scared, alone as my 12% Dutch 25% German 6% Bullshit 19% Inncorectly Pronounced Nation and 9% Mayflower™ family watched me transform into a Smol Med. Sea Girl™. In embarrassment, I fled to Mecca™, where I’ve been hiding underneath the Kaaba ever since. And yes, it is gross, I’ve been eating nothing but earthworms and toenails of old Iraqi men ever since :’)
A little love for the signs (From a Libra sun, Leo moon)
It doesn't matter how dark times are, you are there for me. And I know you will always support me. You can make me happy like no one else can. You can say something that isn't even funny and I have to laugh with you. I could talk all night with you. About anything. You are full of light, full of life. You deserve everything bright.
Even though I've never really been so close to you to say that, I want you to know that you're worth it. You are beautiful, your smile helps people not to give up. So don't give up on yourself. You're strong and I know you smile through the pain, but it's okay. We all go through that and I wanted to tell you that you're not alone.
You are funny, you are witty, you always know how to make me laugh. I am inspired by you. You are so sociable, yet you know how to be alone and overthink things. You can do decisions by yourself, you don't hesistate to make the right choice. I admire you for that. Also, your art is beautiful. You are art.
I know we haven't been best friends. I know we had fights and that you broke my trust too often. But I realized, you are only a human being, just as me. Everyone keeps making mistakes, but no one wants to admit that. I hope for you that you'll be happy in the future. I want you to concentrate more on yourself, not on others because you are you, and no one can be that for you.
Whenever I talk to you, it feels like we understand each other without saying a word. You are passionate and you are optimistic. You are the person I look up to, you brighten everyone's day, yet no one knows if you're dying inside. You are beautiful and you know it. You taught me it's completely fine to love yourself. So do it.
You're so selfless. You always try to help me, doesn't matter if you understand me or not. I know that sometimes it's hard for you to show that you care about me, but I notice in this little things you do for me that you do care. And that's fine. You're human. It's okay to break down. It's okay to talk to someone. You will get through this all. I'm right here by your side.
I feel like everyone of you is my sister or my brother. You can make me feel special without knowing it. When we're talking about god and the world, it's like I've known you all my life, even if it's just hours. I want you to look at the mirror and say "I'm proud". Be confident. Believe in youself. Only if you try that, no one will stop you from loving yourself and the world.
I don't even know where to start. You changed my life. You taught me things in an emotional way I never thought I'd experience. With every wise word you said you took my breath away. It doesn't matter how much time will fly, I will always remember you. You are my first love and you make everything feel so real. Everytime you look at me, I feel special. You taught me how to love someone and I taught you how to love yourself. Be happy. No matter how we're gonna end, I want you to remember us. You deserve the entire universe.
You doubt yourself more than anyone else. You wear that beautiful smile everyday, but inside you don't even know who you are. I have so much fun with you everytime we do something together. Don't let that happiness die. People look up on you. And you have to do your own thing. Don't give a shit what others think. Find out what you need, what you want and what you love. Everything else will come by time.
You are one of the stongest yet most broken person I know. Or should I say, pretend to know? You hide your emotions, afraid of being hurt or replaced. I tell you something: There are people who love you and care about you. There is hope. You can have whatever you want in life, if you're just willing to accept your feelings and yourself.
Being around you is like jumping from one cloud to another. Everything feels easier. Even maths. Life is easier with you. The weight of all the bad things in life are gone. I don't know how you're able to make me feel like this, but I'm sure it makes you very special and I hope you never stop making people feel like this because it's one of the best feelings ever.
If I'm sad, I know I can always talk to you. You always have a solution to my problem. Even if it's just a sentence like "It's okay, we will find a way.", it works. It makes me feel better. You're the most selfless person I've ever met and you're always there for your loved ones. Just take care of yourself, too, because your life is as important as the lives of everyone else.
I learned to read in
English in the 8th grade. As a child immigrant from Mexico
struggling to adapt to the American way of life, I had a hard time finding my
experiences reflected in the books given to me by my teachers at school or the
librarian at the public library. Closest were the works of the Chicana writers
I’d read in college, such as Sandra Cisneros and Helena María Viramontes, where
I found bits and pieces of myself. But I did not find books that spoke directly
to my experience as a child immigrant.
I did find books about
adult immigrants and the struggles that adults—like my parents— experience when
they arrive in the United States: low paying jobs, abuse and discrimination in
the workplace, fear of deportation, struggles to assimilate and learn English,
and the hardships of navigating and understanding the nuances of American
culture and society. But as a child, wasn’t I as much a part of the immigration
narrative? Weren’t my pain and heartbreak, struggles and triumphs, also worth
telling? Didn’t I also risk my life and fight just as hard for my dreams?
-So he would crawl over to your room at three in the morning, and just is sleep by your bed on the floor.
- “We have twelve bedrooms, and you choose to sleep on the floor….”
-If you happened to wake up you would scoot over so he could sleep on the other side of the bed without touching you.
- “It’s okay, I won’t move.”
- When he finally warms up to you he won’t stop touching you.
-Him literally hanging onto you as you walk around the house.
- He almost looks like a baby koala, his arms are around your neck, and his legs wrap around your mid section while your arms support the bottom of his legs and his head is snuggled into the crook of your neck.
-”Damian hang on a little tighter I don’t want to drop you.”
Jinyoung would be the most jealous by far. I mean, we’ve all seen how jealous he gets with his other members, and I feel like it would be even worse with a girlfriend. If he hears about her going out to eat with friends, he would be jealous that he didn’t go out to eat with you, forgetting all the ten million other times you two had gone out together. He wouldn’t be afraid to let you know it either, always pestering you about it. It would be annoying, but you would also know that it comes from a place of love. He just is afraid of being forgotten or replaced by others, which is why he would get jealous over everything, but that would be one of the reasons you love him.
Jackson would be a self-conscious jealous. He would see you talking to another guy or laughing at someone else’s joke, and then he would ask you if you thought he was funny or attractive enough. This would come from a place of jealousy, because you mean the world to him, so he would want to mean the world to you, and he’s afraid that it wouldn’t be the case.
JB would be the quiet jealous. He wouldn’t get jealous at first, but he’ll suddenly notice that you’ve made a new guy friend and have been talking to him quite a bit. He wouldn’t be very verbal about his jealousy, though. He would quietly watch, and then he would make sure to show you who can make your legs quiver at night, making himself feel more secure by knowing that you would never leave him.
Bambam would definitely get jealous if you were talking to someone fashionable. He would want to be the most fashionable person you know, so then he would end up making a fool out of himself to try and get your attention. You wouldn’t even realize it was coming from a place of jealousy, either, because it’s an unusual type of jealousy.
For the most part, Yugyeom wouldn’t get very jealous. He wouldn’t think anything of you talking to other guy. Now the moment that other guy steps over the line by asking you out or getting too touchy, Yugyeom’s jealousy would come out in a protective boyfriend way.
Mark wouldn’t be the jealous type at all. He would trust your relationship completely and know he has nothing to worry because you two are like two peas in a pod. That doesn’t mean he won’t sit back from a far, wishing you would spend more time with him, but he wouldn’t be the type to make a big deal out of it.
Youngjae would be completely oblivious to the fact that you’re trying to make him jealous. He would just have that big smile on his face the whole time, because he knows he has nothing to worry about, because he is head over heals for you, and you for him.
All the blurryface vids and tweets are distorted because blurryface is afraid, you know when you’re so terrified it seems time slows down and everything seems distorted and you can’t type right.. So blurryface represents when you’re afraid and when you have anxiety. So it’s like blurry is the voices in your head. And it seems like Tyler and josh have been letting there blurryfaces go because they’re happier now and Tyler has Jenna but that’s why bf is acting up because he is afraid of being replaced and he doesn’t want to go. Which can explain Tyler’s dark neck makeup, bf has been trying to subdue him and Tyler is resisting, (which can explain the “why is he trying to kill me” that was in Tyler’s twitter bio) . And we can’t forget Josh’s red eye makeup which could be anxiety and fear like josh has been up all night afraid or worrying about Tyler or something. blurryface is scared and he needs the boys to need him He’s trying to prove that he has power. He is in all of us. We are blurryface.
looks really good.” Liam was leaning over your shoulder for the
sixth time today as you were bringing Evie to life a different way -
on the screen of your computer.
you - stop breathing on my neck you’re making it moist and clearly
you had tuna salad for lunch.” You moved away from his lurking
to grab a piece of paper at the other end of the desk.
wasn’t tuna salad - it was a sandwich, if you had accepted my offer
for lunch you would have know that.” Liam said darkly and you
laughed bemused, “sorry, but I’d rather starve.” You kept
watching the clock as the minutes ticked down until you could leave
for the day.
of these days, you’ll accept my lunch offer.” Liam nodded
assuringly while he tried repairing his bruised ego that got more and
more damaged throughout the day from you.
left the office a little bit after six o'clock, your handbag over one
shoulder with your Macbook bag, you walked to the bus stop across the
street, got on it and took it to the stop at the street over from
yours, cutting through the park, you began digging through your bag
for your keys,
you’ve gotta be joking.” You said as you looked up while you
walked up the short walkway off the sidewalk to your front door of
your tiny townhouse, seeing Joe standing there looking around
are you doing here?” You asked as dully as you possibly could,
why your cold and meanness hadn’t deterred him yet, you didn’t know.
needed to see you - well speak to you.” He corrected. “First
of all, how did you find me and secondly - we have nothing that needs
to be talked about, anything you need to really talk to me about can
be from nine am to five pm whilst I’m working.” You explained
finally digging your front door keys from your bag, walking by him to
unlock and open the door you stepped inside.
Joe said turning around after you walked in, he didn’t wait for an
answer as he stepped in behind you.
googled you!” He added as you put your bag down looking over at
him, “you found my address on Google?” You raised your
not exactly… I mean - why are you still hateful towards me? It’s
been years (y/n)!” Joe exclaimed.
Because.” You muttered, “because why?” He questioned
harder and you snapped at him; “because I loved you, you idiot!”
looked taken back by your outburst. “I knew that! That doesn’t
explain anything…” He whispered.
Joe, I loved you - and you had to go get a girlfriend like, Marie and
Tammy and fucking Linda! Who was just … An absolute fucking idiot!
And what do you do? You go and pick her over me! That broke my
heart.” You sighed finally letting everything out was more than
a weight being lifted away, it was almost like a pain you were
carrying was disappearing but being replaced with feelings of afraid.
mean – you liked me?” Joe asked slowly figuring things out for
himself, looking over you in thought.
a little bit.” You tried reeling yourself back in, to be calm. “Why
didn’t you ever tell me?” He asked in a stressed voice, “because
I didn’t want to lose my best friend, Joe – okay.” You pinched
the bridge of your nose, your eyes had been closed when you spoke,
finally you let out a small sigh.
Joe exclaimed but not in a loud voice, “the only reason I ever
dated the morons I did was because I couldn’t have you.” He
muttered. “Linda was the biggest – Wait, what?” You stopped
talking as your brain configured what he’d just said.
liked you since I’ve liked girls! I was hoping one day after all my
stupid break ups you’d just slap me a little and say; ‘Joe, I like
you, ask ME out.’.” He tried mocking your voice horribly. “But
you never did.” He whispered.
you fucking kidding me?” You asked watching him, he shook his head
I’m not, that was always what I dreamed would happen, one day you’d
just tell me you liked me and I’d ask you out and we’d live happily
ever after…” He pointed out, “but that never happened – I
never meant to hurt you especially with Linda. It killed me knowing I
was causing you pain, it killed me knowing my best friend and the
woman I loved hated me.” He touched his chest in his heart region.
“I just thought it was never going to happen between us so I
settled.” He admitted.
never hated you Joe, I still don’t hate you… I was just that –
hurt, defensive, thinking what the fuck this Linda-bitch had that I
didn’t.” You shrugged, “nothing, she had nothing… No one could
ever compare to you – for me anyway.” He stepped closer to you.
“You were everything to me … Everything I wanted you to be,
everything except… Mine.” He brought his hand up, his finger tips
brushed against your face, you lent away from his touch.
He asked you in a low voice, his eyes looking over you watching eyes
your (colour) eyes glassed over as you tried not to start crying.
these years… I tried to stop myself from thinking about you,”
your voice was barely audible as you whispered.
He asked carefully, “I don’t know.” You admitted honestly shaking
your head a little bit,
Joe took your hands into his and held them before you could try
pulling them away, “do you still like me?” He wondered, squeezing
your hands lightly.
you shook your head, “… No.” You said, “oh.” Joe said lowly
letting go of your hands, looking down at his shoes. “I love you.”
You said it, out loud for the first time in the context you really
meant it in, causing him to look up at you.
He said with a small smile, before he stepped closer again, your
fronts almost touching with centimetres only left between you for a
gap. He brought his hands up and placed them on your face, he lent in
and his lips met yours, kissing you carefully but with all of the
emotions the years gone by at caused you both.
pulled away slowly without wanting to and you didn’t want him to
either as you lent in more when he started pulling away. “I love
you, too.” His words soft.
wanted to say that for so long…” He admitted, looking down at
you, your fingers were playing with one of the strings on his hooded
sweater, “I’ve wanted to hear you say that for so long.” You
whispered, looking up at him, a smile had appeared over your lips.
so sorry I hurt you, I’m so sorry that I didn’t have the guts to tell
you how I felt before and I’m sorry I ever let you get away.” He
okay.” You nodded, everything felt okay right now, you didn’t feel
like there was such a bleakness to the future with Joe standing in
front of you without an argument.
never letting you get away again.” He swore with a nod. “You
don’t have to worry about that.” You assured him and it caused him
to smile even brighter.
it again though?” You asked, watching him as he watched you. “What?
I’ll never let you get away again?” He asked and you shook your
head. “Oh.” He realised and smiled. “I love you, (Y/N).”
love you too, Joseph.” You grinned, still with tears in your eyes
that had held off on falling.
Joe wrapping his arms around you, pulling you against him, he lent
down and kissed you again, “we have to make up for all that lost
time.” He pointed out after the kiss…
Okay but there’s something to quintessentially British about the bake off being on the bbc that just don’t think channel 4 will emanate like I can’t explain it but bake off exists in this bubble of British and bbc and they can keep everything the exact same yet it still won’t be right and it’s like doctor who or roadshow or top gear like seeing it anywhere else just won’t feel right and thus won’t be bake off
I want an explanation for Pearl and Amethyst's behavior in Secret Team. Their behavior seems weirdly out-of-character: Why ARE they so afraid of Garnet here? Amethyst even says, "She's gonna kill us!" and Pearl, usually not one for exaggerating (she's ALWAYS corrected others) doesn't correct her or call her out for hyperbole? So we're to believe they were actually afraid to the point of letting Steven take the heat for them! Seriously, this fear is nowhere else to be found in other episodes.
I have some thoughts about this! It’s true we don’t see this vocalised fear in other episodes, but I do think that some of the issues in Crystal Gem dynamics haven’t been completely addressed in the show.
1. There is some disproportionate fear towards Garnet, but not for the reasons we think
I think the impression most people got from their reaction to Garnet’s possible wrath is that it would be physical in nature. “She’s going to kill us!” sounds like a physical threat and given Garnet is a bigger, physically stronger fusion, it’s possible that conclusions were drawn about how threatening that could be. We learn firsthand from Peridot that Garnet, in the eyes of gems, has the capacity to be a non-stop war machine. It’s intimidating knowing that you’ve done something wrong in her eyes.
But I also think it was established rather early that Garnet isn’t the type to physically be angry. In Cry for Help, when she finds out Pearl was lying to her to fuse, Garnet was incredibly angry and Pearl was visibly frightened. Again, her not correcting Amethyst in Secret Team may be a result of her own fear. But I doubt her fear was towards Garnet’s retaliating in a physical way. The body language of that scene tells us as much.
In Cry for Help, she’s not shielding herself from some incoming attack. If Garnet were proven to react in a physical way, then she would have done so. But instead she tries to justify herself, tries to make herself small. And we learn why. Angry Garnet directs her focus onto anything except you. She gives a mean cold shoulder and, to Pearl and Amethyst, who look to Garnet for validation and strength, that’s losing a light source in a dark room. In both Secret Team and Cry for Help, notice how Pearl’s body language, stiff with wide eyes, is an indicator that she is afraid. Because we know Pearl struggles with being replaced and forgotten like an object and from Cry for Help, we know Amethyst shares some of that insecurity and feelings of weakness and helplessness.
So their reaction towards doing something wrong is something I interpret as Amethyst’s reacting the way Amethyst usually does, and Pearl frozen in fear, but thinking of a solution as well.
Amethyst: And when Garnet finds out, we’re dead! Pearl: *calms down slightly* She’s not going to find out… We’re going to catch them— All of them. Amethyst: You’re right. Every single one— Back in a bubble and back in the basement! Pearl: Like nothing ever happened. Steven: And then we tell Garnet? Pearland Amethyst: No!
Because Pearl is the one to first say they’re going to search for the gem shards and put them back without Garnet’s knowledge and Amethyst later jumps on board and agrees.
So I really do think that their fear towards Garnet is genuine, because of how reliant they are on her emotionally. And it’s because there are very few things that can push Garnet into that level of anger. When the other CGs make mistakes, such as Steven in Cheeseburger Backpack or Pearl and Amethyst in Giant Woman, or even Greg in The Message, she’s incredibly understanding about it and moves forward and thinks of solutions. There are few things indeed that would make them fear Garnet’s anger, and that leads me to the next idea.
2. The nature of their playing with gem shards is a huge deal to Garnet
Garnet has very few possessions. Her room is the one opened by Ruby’s and Sapphire’s gems, and it’s referred to as the Burning Room or the Bubble Room.
There is no furniture in her room. There’s nothing to hide; there’s nowhere to hide anything. It’s not like Amethyst’s or Pearl’s room where there are objects or places to hide them. It sounds redundant but I’d like to make that point.
What is in her room? Bubbled gems, and by the looks of it, there are hundreds.
And there’s a reason for that. Garnet gives so much importance to her friends and being responsible for them. She keeps the bubbled gems in her room so she can always keep an eye on them and keep track of them, because she has been keeping track. In Keeping It Together, she has a nervous breakdown after finding out what happened to the gems she wasn’t able to recover.
Garnet: They were forced together… They were forced to fuse! This is wrong! Uh, uh, I’m sorry. … Garnet/Ruby: So this is what Homeworld thinks of fusion! Garnet/Sapphire: We couldn’t have known they would do this… Garnet/Ruby: This is where they’ve been. All the ones we couldn’t find. They’ve been here the whole time! Garnet/Sapphire: Rose couldn’t have known. Garnet/Ruby: This is punishment for the rebellion! Garnet/Sapphire: *sobbing* It’s not our fault!
Garnet feels guilty. Out of the three senior CGs, she feels the most responsible for finding the fallen Crystal Gems. Amethyst would have never met them, and Pearl answered directly to Rose, but Garnet would have been much closer to the gems on the ground and would have got to know many of them. In fact, Rose may have given her responsibilities on the battlefield and it enabled her to become closer to the other CGs.
At that moment she feels that if she could have found them sooner, then they wouldn’t have forced fused in this manner. She thinks she could have prevented them from suffering this fate. So when the micro cluster is reaching out to her, she has nothing to offer except her apologies.
That Pearl would have picked up a bunch of these shards “just to see what they would do” shows an insensitivity to those fallen gems. They’re fallen comrades and she wants to study them. That’s not inherently wrong in itself, because doing studies to understand them is what could unlock curing them. But the fact that Pearl had to take it in secret shows that she knew Garnet wouldn’t be okay with it.
Pearl: I… just wanted to see how the shards are reacting to Rose’s bubble. And it’s none of your business.
And they know that it’s a big deal to Garnet. If not, Amethyst wouldn’t have said immediately that it was Garnet’s business. The fact is Garnet is fiercely protective of her friends, including the fallen ones. Considering that this was one of Rose’s bubbles, that also means these shards were obtained while Rose was still around. That increases the personal value of that bubble and those gems. So both Pearl and Amethyst knew very well that Garnet would be very, very, very angry or upset in this case. They were hitting a very vulnerable spot of hers. It’s also personal. Those bubbles take the place of any personal effects Garnet might have. But I think Secret Team was significant in making Garnet realise that fear existed.
3. There is a lack of communication among the older CGs that make it difficult for this problem to be addressed
Steven approached Garnet personally and informed her about Secret Team. And she didn’t react angrily. She was upset, but she said that between teammates, there should be no secrets, and by extension, no fear to prevent them from telling each other the truth.
And she goes along with the plan to form a new Secret Team and take Pearl and Amethyst by surprise. After her stern lecture, there’s no cold shoulder and no further discussion on the matter. I really feel this was a wakeup call to Garnet, that proceeding in the way she did, without telling her teammates what bothered her specifically about their actions and without sharing what she felt, was becoming detrimental to not only their functioning as a team but also their friendship.
It’s not fun being the friend everyone is afraid of. Really. And what I like is indeed that this reaction from Pearl and Amethyst never reveals itself until Cry for Help. And Cry for Help in turn shows that changing old ways is a difficult, messy, and relapse-laden process. In Secret Team, Garnet addresses the general issue, but in Cry for Help, she goes into her feelings and her thoughts on the mater. She relapses again in It Could’ve Been Great, letting her emotions get in the way of clearing things up with Peridot, but we know that before that, she really tried to get her message across as we’ve seen in Log Date 7 15 2.
It’s really a process and I’m rather glad that we’re seeing it unfold. These changes aren’t as pronounced as the character arcs we’ve seen from Pearl or Peridot, but to me that just makes it mirror life better.
Emma wanting to go back to NY makes perfect sense. And so does being angry with her about it.
Emma’s biggest issue is abandonment. She’s afraid of people leaving her. So she doesn’t give them a chance. She leads a life of no attachments - no friends, one night stands, no permanent home.
The past two episodes have taken a toll on Emma emotionally.
Emma already feels unneeded because:
Regina broke the curse
Regina defeated Zelena with light magic
Regina has “replaced” her as Savior
Even though Emma has said she doesn’t want the role of Savior we know it isn’t true. Being the Savior gave her purpose and made her feel special. It made her feel needed. It made her feel like she was part of something.