advice on women

Stereotyped vs Nuanced Characters and Audience Perception

Writing with color receives many questions regarding the stereotypes Characters of Color and their story lines may possess.

There’s a difference between having a three-dimensional character with trait variance and flaws, versus one who walks the footsteps of a role people of their race/ethnicity are constantly put into. Let’s discuss this, as well as how sometimes, while there’s not much issue with the character, a biased audience will not allow the character to be dimensional.

But first: it’s crucial to consider the thinking behind your literary decisions.

Trace your Logic 

When it comes to the roles and traits you assign your characters, it’s important to ask yourself why you made them the way they are. This is especially true for your marginalized characters.

So you need an intimidating, scary character. What does intimidating look like on first brainstorm? Is it a Black man, large in size or presence? (aka a Scary Black Man) A Latino with trouble with the law? If so, why?

Really dig, even as it gets uncomfortable. You’ll likely find you’re conditioned to think of certain people in certain roles on the spot.

It’s a vicious cycle; we see a group of people represented a certain way in media, and in our own works depict them in the way we know. Whether you consciously believe it’s the truest depiction of them all or not, we’re conditioned to select them for these roles again and again. Actors of Color report on being told in auditions they’re not performing stereotypical enough and have been encouraged to act more “ethnic.” 

This ugly merry-go-round scarcely applies to (cis, straight) white people as they are allowed a multitude of roles in media. Well, then again, I do notice a funny trend of using white characters when stories need a leader, a hero, royalty, a love interest…

Today’s the day to break free from this preconditioned role-assigning.

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@guys who want to find a girl like their mom: your mom cooks and cleans after you because she’s your mom. she has to love you unconditionally, that’s like her job. you won’t ever find a woman who loves you more than she loves herself because the rest of us didn’t carry you for 9 months, weren’t there to see you walk for the first time or potty train you. we don’t have to do your dirty laundry, smile at you when you fuck up and put up with your selfish undeserving ways. we’ll never be your mom. get over yourselves, the sun doesn’t come out of your asses and you only have one mom. don’t go out looking for a wife to replace her

You don’t find love by searching for it, you wait until it lands into your hands.
—  Poets Love Her

Girls, do not minimize yourself to please or impress any boy. Don’t downplay your strengths: your intelligence, ambition, passion, or kindness so boys won’t feel intimidated or threatened. Any boy who thinks you are too anything for him is not enough for you.

She said,
men want brutally beautiful women. 
They want innocently hips,
and honey lips. 
They want honour,
they want snow-white paradise
they can cry into. 
They want sensual summers
and godly bodies. 
They want sugar mysteries. 
They want cinnamon in their food.
They want bite-less teeth, and cry-less voices.
They want Turkish tea, and coconut oil on their bodies.

And I want to
be adored to the point
of madness.

—  To Be A Daughter In Law by Royla Asghar