Just some tips I’ve learned over the years to help with my boyfriend’s dysphoria
•vertical stripes (makes you seem taller)
•uneven patterns such as polka dots (hides any chest bumps)
•jackets, sweaters, or vests (layers hide curves. But be sure they’re not too long. Oversized clothes make you seem smaller. Hem should be no more than 2 inches below waist)
•graphic T shirt (make sure design is higher up on the chest to hide any chest bumps)
•pants (straight fitted. Go up a size. Try to get little to no breaks.)
•round or pointed toed shoes (square toed shoes make you seem shorter)
•hats, glasses, necklaces, bow ties, skinny ties (any accessories should be kept to the upper half of their body to draw the eye up and make them seem taller)
•binders (best binder brands I know of are Underworks, and G2cb)
•shoelifts (amazon has really good cheap ones)
• shop online for smaller men’s clothes (rue21, Zara, American Eagle, Express Men, Asos, H&M)
His point of view.
Every aspect of him, I love.
Find yourself a boy who rubs your legs, even when they’re prickly. Find yourself a boy who plays with you hair, even when there are knots all through it. Find yourself a boy you can binge watch Netflix with, in your underwear, and you haven’t showered since the day before. Date the boy who looks at you at midnight after a McDonald’s run and tells you how beautiful you are and that he can’t fathom why someone as perfect as you would even think about being with someone like him. Date the boy who squeezes your boobs and rubs your butt in the most innocent way possible.
Date the boy who gives you headaches. The boy who is so damn stubborn it frustrates you sometimes. Date the boy who is damaged because he gave his heart out a little too quickly a few times too many. Date the boy you are terrified to lose, the boy you are terrified to love sometimes. The boy that gives you goosebumps and calms your butterflies all in one moment.
Date the boy that makes you so uncomfortably comfortable.
I’m seeing so many girls getting crushed over ugly little boys and I WILL NOT STAND FOR IT.
PSA that everybody needs to hear:
He will not matter in 3 years.
He honestly doesn’t even matter right now. But I know it feels like he does.
He isn’t worth changing yourself for.
He isn’t worth doing something that you don’t want to do.
His happiness is NOT more important than yours. His decisions DO NOT weigh more than yours. His opinions ARE NOT worth more than yours.
Don’t wait for that call. Don’t wait for that text back. Don’t agonize over him being online or offline.
Wipe your tears. Pick up your crown. Wing your damn eyeliner and listen to some damn Rihanna and STOP LETTING A CRUSTY BOY MAKE YOU BELIEVE YOU ARE ANYTHING LESS THAN A FUCKING GODDESS. I PROMISE YOU, 100%, HE IS N O T W O R T H I T.
“Listen to me,” she said, staring intently into my eyes, as I stared back at her as mine were now filling with tears.
“So what he opened your ‘i miss you’ text that you sent drunk at 3 in the morning and he didn’t respond? So what he stopped giving you that shy smile that he always used to send your way when you walked by each other in the hallways? So what his fingers are now intertwined with the hand of a girl that isn’t you? He is the one with a problem.”
“He clearly fails to see how utterly iridescent and beautiful and magnificent you are. Honestly, I feel bad for him. He’s pretty damn stupid if he can’t recognize the pure light that is bursting from your soul.”
“And I’m not going to lie to you, you’re going to meet plenty of other stupid assholes in your lifetime- they’ll break your heart in more ways than one. The one thing you’ll need to remember though- always, always remember- tattoo it on your forehead if you have to, is this: his opinion does not define you. His inability to see and appreciate the fucking miracle of God that you are is not your fault. So stop putting the blame on you, and most importantly, stop letting the opinion of a boy who won’t matter in 6 months time effect how you see yourself. You are worth so much more than losing yourself over a boy who doesn’t care.”
“What matters is that you put your heart out on the line. Yeah, it was torn to pieces this time. But I absolutely promise you that one day, you’ll give your heart to somebody, and they won’t drop it. Instead, they’ll give theirs right back to you. And something so indescribably wonderful and magical will come out of it that this boy won’t even be a sliver of a thought in your mind. I promise.”