adrift at sea

  • What she says: I'm fine.
  • What she means: Hello and welcome to Griffin's amiibo Corner, I'm Griffin and this is the VR Zone, a beautiful virtual world that has proven to be an inescapable tormentor for this amiibo reviewer. It has been 3 weeks since my body and mind were surrendered to the harsh whims of the VR Zone, and I am beginning to worry that I may never see the light of the flesh world sun ever again. My connection to the outside world has been severed, leaving me stranded, adrift in a virtual sea that was designed for in-depth amiibo reviews but not for human survival. As such I have had to salvage the natural resources of this world to satisfy my life requirements, such as this lean-to shelter, which is surprisingly spacious and maybe even a little bit comfortable. This humble hut is home to me, and my only companion in this world; the Toad amiibo, whose paint lines were compromised in an attack on our hut by a swarm of Harvesters, a virtual menace that covets and seeks out foreign matter originating from the flesh world. Though my form is completely virtual I still desire sustenance. Obtaining food has led me to commit unforgivable acts of violence against the wildlife in the VR Zone, but such is the order of things, following a belief system that natives to the VR Zone call "The Great Wheel." My only other company in the VR Zone is the Dark Orb, which silently watches my endeavor to stay alive in this cruel environment. To touch the Dark Orb is to become one with the VR Zone and find peace in its endless quiet expanse, but to do so would betray my oneness and my human agency. Every day I greet the Orb like an old friend and consider its eternal offer. Every day I have refused, but I do not know how long my willpower can hold out, may The Great Wheel sustain me. This morning the Toad amiibo further gave of his body to aid in my survival. He forfeited his near-field communication chip embedded deep inside of his base, to help me attempt to establish a connection with my home terminal using this virtual machine, which is mostly comprised of wood, flesh, and teeth. In defiance of the Dark Orb's will, I will now attempt my escape, using this, my first and final lifeline. It seems to have worked! I can feel my home terminal's emergency protocols activating- wait, oh my god. Oh my god Toad, no. No please wait! Please god! Stop! Toad please! Come to me Toad! Please Toad no...

crack theory: 

No one alive outside Hannibal and Will KNOW about Will getting stabbed in the face in TWOTL. Even if Francis’ camera was started before he did the stabbing, it was pointed at Hannibal on the floor. 

So, rather than having a beard in S4, Will’s gonna go clean shaven (but have long bangs to hide the can opener scar).

And he’s gonna make up increasingly preposterous stories every time someone asks about the scar. 

“Got stabbed while saving an old lady from being robbed.” 

“Got stabbed by an old lady who was really a young punk robbing me.”

“Got harpooned while adrift at sea with this asshole cannibal who thought I looked tasty.”

how to make The Chosen One choose YOU: flirting, baz pitch style

(honestly im basically shitposting at this point, but i just love carry on so much. leave me be)

CUSTOMER REVIEWS: 

“I like this better than fighting,”  - Simon Snow (The Chosen One) 

  • threaten him with a viking’s funeral
  • (“do you know what that is, snow? A flaming pyre, set adrift on the sea. We could do yours in blackpool, so all your chavvy Normal friends can come,”)
  • make him cry, then drop your handkerchief sarcastically on his bed
  • call him a disgrace to magic
  • make sure it’s first thing in the morning, too, for added effect
  • turn on the charm. Woo him with your best lines
  • example, (what if I took your magic, cast it against you, and settled baz versus simon once and for all?)
  • don’t just rely on words. Act on your feelings too
  • example, push him down a flight of stairs, attempt to feed him to a chimera, etc.
  • cavort with his gf in the woods
  • bonus points if he sees it (hell, hold her hands too while you’re at it)
  • cant accept your own feelings? Conspire with your aunt to take him down
  • no chosen one, no problem
  • hopeless love? Have a backup plan
  • example: marry his ex and find a thousand different men who look like him and break each of their hearts a different way
  • just try to be honest with your feelings. Tell him you want him by your side
  • (“what if I accidentally Turned you? Then i’d be stuck with your pious face forever,”)
  • oh baz. Im swooning
  • invite him to your victorian mansion for christmas under the guise of “truce”
  • first date ideas!
  • – bring him to the british museum, steal a few books, take a walk around the park and find a place where he can eat curry while you read your stolen goods
  • dont forget to be a good conversationalist
  • (“you should eat something,”)
  • (“piss off,”)
  • confused? Lost? Failed at something important?
  • Hell, set a few trees on fire and wait for the flames to consume you
  • bonus points if you’re flammable
  • (hint! Hint! This is a good chance for a >>>KISS<<<!!!)
  • if you do it right, HE’LL kiss YOU
  • sulk and stomp away if he doesnt pull you into his arms and say “good morning, darling” when he opens his eyes first thing in the morning
  • respond to his feelings properly
  • (“you slept in my arms,”)
  • (“fitfully”)
  • accept him for who he is
  • found out your bf literally couldn’t be a bigger mess/supervillian/insiduous humdrum?
  • Kiss him, anyway (because you match)
  • (“i’m not the humdrum! But why does thinking so make you want to kiss me?”)
  • (“Everything makes me want to kiss you”)
  • seriously, I was swooning when I got to this part. Like. Seriously. Swooning. (I think I was crying a little too)

cute nicknames:

  • you courageous fuck
  • you absolute nightmare
  • love

say I love you. like, a lot 

  • I was eleven years old, and I’d lost my mother, and my soul, and the crucible gave me you
  • You were the centre of my universe. Everything else spun around you
  • looking at you was like looking directly into the sun
  • I choose you

BONUS: HE WAS PRACTICALLY PROPOSING OKAY

  • who needs magic? I’m going to turn you into a vampire and make you live with me forever

no, no im not crying. i just have a bit of snowbaz in my eye 

Getting a firm handle on the geography of Ancient Greece both answers and raises questions.

On the one hand, the logistics of all those huge military campaigns make a lot more sense once you realise that many of the great city-states were basically within walking distance of each other. In many cases, those logistics boil down to less “establish a supply train” and more “well, make sure you pack a snack”.

On the other hand, all those episodes where great heroes spend years lost in the wilderness or adrift at sea become more difficult to reconcile. It’s like… how can you possibly get that lost for that long? If you found a good-size hill to climb, you can practically see your destination from your starting point!

It is a puzzlement.

In 1995, Marine Lance-Corporal Zachary Mayo was wandering around his aircraft carrier when a metal door swung open and comically butt-whacked him into the open ocean. Unfortunately, no one else was around to appreciate this moment of physical comedy. Or to hear his cries for help. A hundred miles from shore, it seemed Davy Jones’ Locker was Mayo’s inevitable destination. And yet he was found alive almost two days later by a boat full of Pakistani fishermen.

It wasn’t dumb luck – Mayo remembered his Navy training and made use of a survival technique called “drownproofing.” It requires that you take your pants off. No, stay with us here.

If you find yourself suddenly and unexpectedly adrift at sea, you can MacGyver your pants into a life preserver. First, take them off and tie the ankles together in a tight knot. Then lift the waistband high, hold it open, and swoosh your pants through the air like you just don’t care (about wearing pants; you care very much about not drowning). Slip the legs over your head, keep the waistband underwater so that the air doesn’t come out, and then pray sharks don’t take an interest in your exposed genitals.

5 Seemingly Insane Survival Tips That Actually Work

it’s cool that people are recognising that alolan raichu is probably ‘based on’ the blue-eyed pikachu from the anime but it goes even further than that

the ‘mysterious’ puka literally washed ashore from the sea

there’s like a 100% chance that alolan raichu evolves from a blue-eyed, water-psychic alolan variant of pikachu, which very occasionally ends up adrift at sea and washes up on the pokéarth mainland

When a parent forces parental responsibilities on a child, family roles become indistinct, distorted, or reversed. A child who is compelled to become his own parent, or even become a parent to his own parent, has no one to emulate, learn from, and look up to. Without a parental role model at this critical stage of emotional development, a child’s personal identity is set adrift in a hostile sea of confusion.
—  Dr. Susan Forward, “Toxic Parents: overcoming their hurtful legacy and reclaiming your life” AKA: if I could recommend one book to Dean Winchester
8

She was the nefarious, solitary, and loveless wife of Tarannon, Berúthiel lived in the King’s House in Osgiliath, hating the sounds and smells of the sea and the house that Tarannon built below Pelargir “upon arches whose feet stood deep in the wide waters of Ethir Anduin;” she hated all making, all colours and elaborate adornment, wearing only black and silver and living in bare chambers, and the gardens of the house in Osgiliath were filled with tormented sculptures beneath cypresses and yews. She had nine black cats and one white, her slaves, with whom she conversed, or read their memories, setting them to discover all the dark secrets of Gondor, so that she knew those things “that men wish most to keep hidden,” setting the white cat to spy upon the black, and tormenting them. No man in Gondor dared touch them; all were afraid of them, and cursed when they saw them pass.

At last King Tarannon had her set on a ship alone with her cats and set adrift on the sea before a North wind. The ship was last seen flying past Umbar under a sickle Moon, with a cat at the masthead and another as a figure-head on the prow. And her name was erased from the Book of the Kings.

(requested by anonymous)

Daydream Believer . . .

I often take naps when I’m wide awake,

kept alive solely by this thrumming ache.

Dazed and empty, I roam the street,

just to shuffle away the numbness that plagues my feet.

Lost and adrift in a lonely sea of resplendent memory,

feeling sickly bereft with the shimmering sheen of loss.

Forever injured by weeping wounds that refuse to provide any refuge for me,

wanting to further postpone my own healing, to prolong the sweet misery, even drown in it, no matter what the cost.

Larsen B Ice Shelf BreakupOver a 35-day period in early 2002, Antarctica’s Larsen B ice shelf lost a total of about 1,255 square miles, one of the largest shelf retreats ever recorded. This image, captured by NASA’s MODIS satellite sensor on February 23, shows the shelf mid-disintegration, spewing a cloud of icebergs adrift in the Weddell Sea.

SCREAMS

PG 133: 

Five months since he became a chunin. 

Concerned about Itachi never taking a proper day off, the village ordered him to take a longish break of a week. They were going to force him to rest. His father nodded at this order, noting the timing was right, and told him to also take a break from training with Shisui that week.

Given that Itachi had no idea what to do with his time other than missions and training, he couldn’t stop feeling like he had suddenly been set adrift in a calm sea. He tried to sleep all day, but his body, used to missions, woke him up before the crows started cawing in the morning.

As soon as Kuro steps in through the door, Kenma knows that something is wrong. 

He doesn’t say anything though, instead allowing Kuro to strip off his coat, toss his keys down, and fume quietly to himself for a few minutes longer. Kenma sits up when Kuro makes his way over to the couch.

“Oomph.” 

Kenma is glad he made the smart choice of putting his phone down before Kuro plops his whole body weight on him, pressing his face into Kenma’s shirt and fitting his hands around Kenma’s body like he was a small boat adrift at sea, searching for an anchor. Kenma shifts until they are both lying fully on the couch, Kuro’s stupidly long legs dangling off the other end.

“Bad day?” he murmurs, running a hand through the mess of dark hair resting on his chest.

Kuro replies with a pained groan, nuzzling his face into Kenma’s shoulder. He smells like rain, though it wasn’t raining that hard when he called to say he was coming home. His skin feels cool against Kenma’s own, and despite being pinned down by the larger boy’s weight, Kenma doesn’t feel trapped at all. Instead, it’s reassuring, familiar, it’s warm comfort after a long day of gray and rain. Kenma hopes it’s the same for the other.

“Want me to heat up some dinner?” 

“Mm. Later. Stay like this for a bit. Please.” 

Kenma hums in agreement, sliding his hands from Kuro’s hair to his neck, trailing down from his broad shoulders to his back. He does it a few times, smiling a little when he feels Kuro sigh softly against his neck. He shivers when Kuro’s lips press a tiny kiss just under his jaw.

They stay like that for a long while. The rain outside continues to fall, but on the right side of the window pane, lying still on the couch, limbs entangled together and chests rising and falling in sync with each other, they drift in peaceful seas, not a thought nor care for the rest of the world outside their cozy living room.