adjustment

D for Dependence

“…Grown up and mature
I look up to you still
Has it helped carve out this person you see
Or holding myself back
I lost some part of me?”

Wondering what the above lines mean? That’s a good start 🙂
Isn’t it sometimes easy to depend on others? To believe in the presence of people? It may be anyone… parents, siblings, friends, an acquaintance and so on. Sometimes it is so easy to open up and depend on others because we know that we also return that favour. We call it Adjustment. Mutual Dependence. Love.
It may not always involve hurt and insecurities. Sometimes, it brings with it a feeling of warmth and gratitude when we acknowledge someone doing something for us. The rush of positivity experienced is energizing. How a simple ‘yes,I’ll do it’ from someone can mean so much, have you wondered? Have you earned it?

However, on the other hand, depending on others can be hurtful too. Especially when they do not acknowledge what we do for them. Dependence is good till the point it helps you grow, till the time you keep moving forward, and till the time it’s liberating instead of binding. Anything beyond might be unhealthy and give you a world of grief…

Sometimes,we have to be our own pillar and other times we need to seek help. Don’t hesitate to do either because just as everything in life, this is also something that needs to be balanced. There will be times where you’d have to be independent and there’d be times when you’d have to depend on someone for your next step.
Listen to your heart and a bit of your brain too 😉 it’s not the most charming combination but it’ll get you through.
Stop for a while and feel grateful amidst the chaos called life for the people you can truly depend on and people who can proudly count on you 😊

Let me know your thoughts after you stop and think 😊

Most people live life on the path we set for them, too afraid to explore any other. But once in a while people like you come along and knock down all the obstacles we put in your way. People who realize free will is a gift you never know how to use until you fight for it. I think that’s the Chairman’s real plan - that maybe one day we won’t write the plan, you will.
—  The Adjustment Bureau
flickr

JoshRutledge adjust by Jock Strap pushing them nuts back up in that cup

The times of drastic change are times of passions. We can never be fit and ready for that which is wholly new. We have to adjust ourselves and every radical adjustment is a crisis in self-esteem: we undergo a test; we have to prove ourselves. A population subjected to drastic change is, thus, a population of misfits, and misfits live and breathe in an atmosphere of passion.
—  Bruce Lee, Tao of Jeet Kune Do

I don’t know what’s worse:
The daily realization that everyone is happier than me.

Trying to tell myself daily that my own happiness does not depend on the happiness of others and I shouldn’t use their’s as a judge.

Or the fact that the subjective, objective, reality is that I’m a fucking unhappy mess

Psychological Disorder #1 - Adjustment Disorder

Description:

Occurs when an individual is unable to adjust to or cope with a particular stressor, like a major life event. Since people with this disorder normally have symptoms that depressed people do, such as general loss of interest, feelings of hopelessness and crying, this disorder is also sometimes known as situational depression. Unlike major depression however, the disorder is caused by an outside stressor and generally resolves once the individual is able to adapt to the situation.

Signs and Symptoms:

According to the DSM IV-TR, the development of the emotional or behavioral symptoms of this diagnosis have to occur within three months of the onset of the identifiable stressor(s). Some emotional signs of AD are sadness, hopelessness, lack of enjoyment, crying spells, nervousness, anxiety, worry, desperation, trouble sleeping, difficulty concentrating, feeling overwhelmed and thoughts of suicide. Some behavioral signs of AD are fighting, reckless driving, ignoring important tasks such as bills or homework, avoiding family or friends, performing poorly in school, skipping school, or vandalizing property.

Treatment:

The recommended treatment for adjustment disorder is psychotherapy. The goal of psychotherapy is symptom relief and behavior change. Anxiety may be presented as “a signal from the body” that something in the patient’s life needs to change. Treatment allows the patient to put his or her distress or rage into words rather than into destructive actions. Sometimes small doses of antidepressants and anxiolytics are also used in addition to other forms of treatment. In patients with severe life stresses and a significant anxious component, benzodiazepines are used, although non-addictive alternatives have been recommended for patients with current or past heavy alcohol use, because of the greater risk of dependence. Tianeptine, alprazolam, and mianserin were found to be equally effective in patients with AD with anxiety. Additionally, antidepressants, antipsychotics (rarely) and stimulants (for individuals who became extremely withdrawn) have been used in treatment plans.

Prevalence:

5-20% of population