actually this movie changed my life in some way

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300 FAVORITE MOVIES (in no particular order)

143. Breakfast on Pluto (2005)

“Not many people can take the tale of Patrick Braden, aka St. Kitten, who strutted the catwalks, face lit by a halo of flashbulbs as "oh!” she shrieks, “I told you, from my best side darlings”

So Did I Ever Tell You How I Met Kara?

This is one for the “really, Sci, REALLY?” files.

So in 2012, I was not really doing well, on a couple of levels.  Looking back on it now, I was very depressed, I was in the process of cutting some toxix people out of my life and realizing that I didn’t have much beyond that toxic circle.  Which makes it very hard to keep from going back.  Because, hey, it was miserable, and I kept crying the entire way home from work three days out of five, but without it, I was…  Pretty much alone.

That spring, I wandered into Avengers fandom and wrote “Some Things Shouldn’t Be a Chore.”  I finished it, actually, in my hotel room at Anime Boston, and clutching my laptop in the back of the AMV recaps and as people filed in and out of the screening rooms.

That one fic changed the course of my life, in a few ways.  But something else happened that weekend, that I couldn’t have expected.  I met Kara.

She was in the last row of AB’s AA, and, she had Avengers stuff.  Now, keep in mind, the movie hadn’t come out yet, and this was an anime con.  Kara was pretty much the only one who had Avengers art that wasn’t bubble-breasted, dead-eyed drawings of Jean Grey and Psylocke.  And as we were chatting, I noted she had a print with Coulson.

And she pointed out that she had a little sketch book of Coulson doodles, and I burst out, “Oh my god, I am totally inviting you to my birthday party.”

(Sidenote: I said this because I am horribly socially awkward, HORRIBLY, and this is how I try to say ‘i like you we should be friends.’  Except, you know, NOT.  Because I am an IDIOT.)

And she just kind of laughed and said, unfortunately, she lived in Texas, so… She’d have to decline.  Which was, honestly, the best response one could hope to get for saying something that stupid.  So I took a card, and bought some prints, and walked away thinking, well, at least I’d never have to relive THAT embarrassment again.

A few months later, I’d published “SHIELD and OSHA Aren’t on Speaking Terms.”  And on my dash one day, someone had reblogged a picture of Clint clinging to a flying Roomba.

My flying Roomba.  Because who ELSE would do that?  And what was more, I recognized the style.  I went digging through my stuff from the con, and found the card.  Yes.  Sam person.  I know this artist.  I’d TALKED to this artist.  I’d completely embarrassed myself in front of this artist.

It took me two days of freaking out before I had the guts to send an ask that just said, “You have no way of knowing, but we’ve actually met.”  Luckily for me, she was just as socially awkward as I am and the phrase “I’m pretty sure I asked you to my birthday party” didn’t so much as phase her.

Kara’s been a big part of my mental health for the last few years.  She’s the one I text when my car breaks down, or when I’m having a panic attack in my bathroom at work.  She’s the one who listened to me cry about my grandma, and gives me pep talks when I want to give up on writing this nonsense.

She had some unplanned medical expenses, and she’s trying to raise some money to cover them.  You can see the MERMAID AND MERMEN prints she did for this HERE!  (Warning: Art NSFW because of breasts.  They’re very nice breasts, though!)

So here’s the thing.  If you can afford to help Kara out, either by buying a print, a shirt, or just dropping a donation into the link on her Tumblr of at least $5.00, forward me the confirmation email proving you’ve helped her out, and I’ll sweeten the pot by sending you all the Christmas Card Fics from this year.  This was the year I did relationships, so you’ll get Steve/Tony, Phil/Clint, Sif/Maria, Bruce/Betty, the Interns, DJ/Lucy, Thor/Jane and the general Avengers family fic. 8)

This applies, of course, if you’ve already made a donation or bought a shirt!  Just forward the confirmation email to sciwritesfic at gmail dot com, and I’ll send you a file with the holiday fics. 8)

Thanks, guys!

I’ve decided it’s time to let everybody in on a closely guarded secret.

When I first started blogging here at Tumblr, I felt a little out of place because I wasn’t a teenager or a young adult. But as time has gone on, I’ve come to realize that people of all ages blog here, and I’ve also come to realize that some of the people I interact with a lot are relatively close to my age. So I’m not feeling so much like I’m sticking out like the proverbial sore thumb anymore.

I also decided that this was the perfect time to lift the veil, so to speak, since we’re just a week away from The Force Awakens, and it will help to explain why I will likely be a sobbing wreck all weekend if it turns out to be as good and reverential to the source material as it appears to be.

It’s because I’ve been there from the very beginning.

I’ve always told people that I know exactly where I was when John F. Kennedy was assassinated. I was in my mother’s tummy. I was born about 6 weeks after the assassination, and one month before The Beatles appeared on The Ed Sullivan Show.

I was born on January 8, 1964, so in a little less than a month, I will be 52 years old.

I was 2 when Star Trek premiered, and 5 when man walked on the moon for the first time. I can tell you what it’s like to live with a black and white TV with only 6 VHF channels and some weird UHF channels, and how you had to play with the rabbit ear antennas to get good reception. I can tell you what it’s like to use a rotary telephone, an 8-track tape, a vinyl record, a pay phone, and all kinds of other things that are pretty obsolete nowadays. I’ve been a fan of Doctor Who since the Tom Baker era, when the show was on Channel 52 in Los Angeles, and I went to some small conventions where I actually met Elisabeth Sladen (♥♥♥) and Louise Jameson, plus I saw Tom Baker in person. My mother brought me up as a Sherlock Holmes fan, and we swooned over Granada Holmes together. She was even lucky enough to see Jeremy Brett on stage in L.A. as Dracula.

When I was 13, this little movie called Star Wars came out. Since my mother was such a sci-fi geek girl, she and I went to see it together. It was the first movie that really changed my life in a lot of ways. It led to my first true celebrity crush (Harrison Ford), it led to my becoming a collector, it led to my starting to dabble in fan fiction. My mother and I attended the 10th anniversary Star Wars convention in 1987 in Los Angeles, where I got to meet Billy Dee Williams, and we sat in a line for about 4 hours to see George Lucas, who at that time wasn’t doing conventions at all.

So The Force Awakens coming out is a huge, huge thing for me. I feel like I’m revisiting old friends that I’ve missed so much, I can’t even begin to tell you. As I told my sister the other day, I feel like I need to keep pinching myself, it’s so unbelievable. 

When I turned 50, it felt weird. But at least 50 isn’t what it used to be, it really isn’t that old. (And my sister was right when she said it was very liberating, because it’s like I’m 50 now, I don’t have to put up with your shit anymore. That’s pretty much my attitude nowadays.) What’s really nice is that my parents gifted me with good genes and everyone I meet basically calls me a liar when I tell them my age. I’ve got some silver hair that’s been growing in kind of like Rogue’s hair for 10 years now, but I’ve actually had to show people my driver’s license because they simply don’t believe me. And as it is, I always tell people that it’s just my chronological age. It really is just a number. Mentally I feel about 12 most of the time.

I do look at some of you youngsters here and feel envious sometimes. You’ve all got your lives to look forward to, and sometimes I really do wish I could do some time travel and change some of my life. I had hopes and dreams and expectations about what adulthood would bring, and in general none of them came true. Hence my anxiety and depression, but it is what it is, and I do my best to muddle along.

So now you know. Hopefully it came as a pleasant surprise to everybody!