When Pisces and Pisces get together they are bound to drive each other into a rehab and/or an insane asylum. Both will eventually experience liver failure as a result of alcohol addiction.
Aquarius and Pisces together is unsuccessful. Aquarius gets outraged when Pisces
mistakes an experimental liquid for scotch. Pisces becomes an amoeba. Aquarius hides the evidence.
Aquarius and Aquarius
will both become nostalgic together remembering their young days on planet Floorp, where their brilliant ideas were shared and individuality was appreciated. True Love.
Capricorn has no patience for Pisces
who repeatedly tries to spend the couple’s fortune on their own drug problem. Capricorn eventually tries to profit off Pisces’s drug supply.
It doesn’t work.
Capricorn and Aquarius is a give and take relationship. Cap will
use the experimentsAqua
is conducting to make a fortune. Aquarius is paid off in stylish jackets!
Capricorn and Capricorn is
not a trusting partnership. They both hide money and Twinkies from each other. They only talk about the weather and golf.
Not surprisingly, Sagittarius
loves drinking just as much as
Pisces! But Sag has no time for Pisces sob stories. The two typically meet at a bar, prison, or brothel.
Sagittarius and Aquarius are
the PERFECT couple. Sag has no attention span and Aquarius doesn’t care. Both will eventually forget they are dating.
Sagittarius and Capricorn never ends pretty. Sagittarius manages to break all of Cap’s fine china while roller skating in the foyer. Needless to say, Sag is executed immediately.
Sagittarius and Sagittarius makes the
clumsiest and most reckless zodiac pair ever to be known to man. Together they will burn down their cardboard house doing lighter-fart tricks.
loves to easily manipulate and easily control someone. Scorpio also loves cool ranch Doritos but they’ll never tell you. Pisces is no fool though. Pisces knows all and Pisces sees all; Pisces just doesn’t care.
Scorpio will never understand Aquarius and Aquarius will never understand humans. After two failed attempts to bug the lab Scorpio gives up
Scorpio and Capricorn
are like two mob men that accidentally fell in love. They are both controlling evil freaks. Not nice neighbors.
has a hard time keeping track of
Sagittarius. That is ONLY because every time it rains Sag has to find a new box to live in. Talk about impossible.
Scorpio and Scorpio are the real life Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Both are the devil and both have fun slitting each others throats.
Libra supports Pisces’s drinking habits and doesn’t care if their breath smells like Georgie. Neither own a toothbrush or socks.
Libra and Aquarius are
equally weird and equally dirty. Libra lets Aquarius stick test tubes and thermometers up their butt. Quite the happy couple.
is typically a serf
in Capricorn’s kingdom. Capricorn likes Libra because Libra doesn’t know what money is. Everyone goes home happy!
Libra loves Sagittarius’s spacious apartment which actually happens to be an old dumpster. Sag doesn’t mind Libras guitar playing while on drugs.
Libra is too peaceful for angry Scorpio
who finds nothing to control. Scorpio forces Libra to take a bath. Libra farts and says “Namaste”.
Libra and Libra
typically meet at an orgy or through a mutual lover. They enjoy reading Dr. Seuss and braiding each others back hair at tea.
will constantly be cleaning up
vomit, tears, and empty bottles. Pisces gets kicked out on day six.
Virgo meets Aquarius’s alien relatives and makes a negative remark about their green skin. They never come over, nor are invited, for lasagna again.
Virgo and Capricorn
are immensely compatible! There’s love but manipulative Virgo’s time is mostly spent taking money from Capricorn’s off shore accounts to spend on a fondue machine. Luckily for Virgo, this goes unnoticed.
Virgo and Sagittarius is
the least compatible pair in all of astrological history. Sag eats, drinks, and dirties everything they touch. Virgo cries.
Virgo will polish all of Scorpio’s weapons that they have hidden in their secret armory. Works for a while… then Scorpio “accidentally” kills Virgo.
cannot possibly live with the laid back and gentle
will literally die of a heart attack when they see all the dirty q tips and expired milk.
Together, Virgo and Virgo create
the most annoying couple you will ever meet. Most annoying sign of the zodiac x2. No one comes to their Tupperware parties.
Leo and Pisces…
turn back now! Pisces
is a miserable alcoholic who pays more attention to their liquor funds than Leos latest up-do.
needs to be the center of attention.
pays no attention to anyone. Leo does the Macarena in Aquarius’s lab. Leo: 1 Aquarius: 0.
Leo wants Capricorn
to spend a fortune on them but all of Capricorn’s money is tucked away on a small island off the coast of Bermuda. No deal hoe.
Leoand Sagittarius is
“zodiacs biggest diva meets zodiacs biggest douche bag”. It works! Leo will simply have to get used to the rats and Sag’s beer breath.
Leoand Scorpio makes a
horrible zodiac match. Scorpio tries to make Leo wear a Burka and convert to Islam. Leo is too busy bedazzling a beret.
Leo tries to boss Libra around but Libra does not listen. This isn’t because they’re rebellious; it’s because they have years worth of earwax.
Leo dislikes Virgo
because they can’t be the boss. Virgo hates pulling out hairs from the hairbrush. Leo hates Mistolin. Failed romance.
Leo and Leo
will live extravagantly in a customized house full of mirrors. But they will always fight over the hair brush and who gets the last Rice Krispie treat.
Cancer thinks they can fix Pisces
with some TLC (tender, love, and care). Pisces repays cancer with a box full of donuts and cardiac arrest.
Cancer accidentally washes Aquarius’s beakers and puts them with the glassware. Aquarius eats Cancer.
Opposites attract: Cancer is usually Capricorn’s
maid or butler in their giant mansion. This is usually an affair. Ends with a $20 check.
Cancer needs a loving home which Sagittarius
cannot provide because their home is the inside of a porta-potty. Cancer walks away gratefully.
Cancer and Scorpio
are a perfect match because Scorpio needs total control and Cancer allows. Cancer gives Scorpio their debit pin on the second date.
is constantly cleaning up after
Libra. But Libra pays Cancer back in horrible singing and Buddhist advice so it all works out!
Cancer and Virgo
take turns in the kitchen. They also take turns at being bitches. Most successful gay males have Cancer-Virgo parents.
has to spread rose Petals on the ground before
as they walk. Cancer is treated like Dobby from Harry Potter.
Cancer and Cancer
will hold each other wearing nothing but aprons and watch Titanic on repeat until their tear ducts have run dry. OTP.
Wickedly compatible: Gemini is Pisces drug dealer.
They pour Henny (famous liquor) on each others privates and usually bring animals into the bedroom. Ends in hepatitis.
Gemini and Aquarius
count cards in casinos, become rich, then buy a mansion in Punta Cana. Gemini turns up missing several days later. Diggin’ that commitment, Gem.
Gemini and Capricorn
meet while Gemini is robbing Capricorns safe. Gemini is not afraid to have sex for jewels.
Opposites attract: Gemini and Sagittarius
are married for years and they don’t remember each others names nor birthdays. They live in a trash can. Harmonious.
Gemini and Scorpio attempt to
play a game of “how-to-ruin-lives”. Scorpio is possessive and Gemini cannot be possessed. Literal shackles and chains.
Gemini and Libra is “Brooklyn hippie meets heights garbage”. Gemini’s boys will start to wonder when Gem started wearing fedoras.
Gemini and Virgo
together is literally like when a Dominican guy is dating his mother. She tries to clean his Jordan’s with Lisol, so he pees in the hamper. Destruction.
Gemini only dates Leo
because they want to get in on all the twitter followers Leo has. The relationship is a fraud. Haven’t even held hands.
Gemini comes home to Cancer
once every three weeks to tell more lies and to shower. Cancer makes mangu and cries on it for good luck for Gems drug sales.
Gemini and Gemini is
your classic L.A. hood couple that gets into fist fights at parties, leaves their baby with a stranger, then goes to shop at Forever 21.
Taurus and Pisces are
the kings of gluttony. Endless chicken and ribs topped off with Everclear. They vomit on each other to express their love.
will never discover the “secret” lab
Aquarius has in
the garage because they don’t leave the couch. Harmony… until Taurus wakes up with three eyes and the ability to live without eating.
Taurus and Capricorn…aka
two of the most selfish and boring zodiac signs. Taurus becomes restless because Capricorn only invests in stocks not Gucci bags.
Doomed from the start: Taurus and Sagittarius
will never work out. Taurus never leaves home and Sagittarius is homeless. They only meet by chance at late night drive-throughs.
Opposites attract: Taurus is greedy and Scorpio
is evil. This relationship consists of systematic homicides and jewel thievery.
Taurus and Libra
are both ruled by Venus.
This means they are both beautiful but lazy fuckin’ assholes. To sum it up: Libra doesn’t bathe and Taurus doesn’t notice.
Taurus and Virgo are two very similar individuals! Virgo will watch how Taurus spends money and how Taurus eats, like a hawk. Taurus will criticize cooking. End result: Bloodshed.
Taurus and Leo could work out if they stopped spending all the money on fancy shit they can’t afford and stopped fighting over swag and cream puffs.
Taurus and Cancer is a
match made in heaven. Cancer cooks and Taurus eats. Both never leave the house. Boring hermit losers.
Taurus and Gemini
live comfortably at first because Gemini will steal Louboutins and Prada bags for their lover. So: Luxury then prison.
Taurus and Taurus
will meet in a McDonalds and fall madly in love. Their family photos will look oddly similar to a pack of warthogs.
Aries and Pisces
will be swimming in a sea of E&J and tears. Alcoholics anonymous was made for people like them.
Aries breaks Aquarius’s
lab equipment in rage so Aquarius has alien associates abduct and mince the ram. A clean break.
Aries and Capricorn is
disastrous. Capricorn hides all the money because they know Aries will spend it on white vansand aged liquor.
Aries and Sagittarius makes the best of buds who usually enjoy sniffing cocaine off each others collar bones and robbing McDonalds. Will most likely end in jail.
Aries will upset Scorpioone time and then will never be seen again.
Opposites attract: Aries
the belligerent “leader” with Libra
the free spirit. It’s like Romeo and Juliet because everyone dies
in the end.
does not have the upper-hand with
Virgo because Virg
hides all the alcohol to be spiteful and they are swift with a
chancla. Advice: Run, now.
Aries and Leo
will have the police called on them every night for blasting Madonna too loud and having beer bottles all over the property.
Aries and Cancer is “Typical city garbage meets suburb princess”. Suicide is in the cards, folks.
Aries is outraged because Gemini
drinks all of their wine and refuses to play DMX at family parties. Neither pay rent. Inevitable eviction.
Aries will fight Taurus
for eating all the food in the house. Together they resemble one spaghetti and one meatball walking down the street.
Aries and Aries are
classic members of poverty cycle. One’s a jobless scumbag and the other works as a part time prostitute. They will never leave the Bronx.
With regard to all the hotshots out there bragging about how they use the conventional standard 9.80665 m/s2 instead of 9.8 m/s2 for the gravitational acceleration constant g…
That number does not take into account effects such as buoyancy and drag, nor does it account for altitude. I’m also pretty certain that most people who are bragging about this aren’t doing work that requires that much precision, so it’s not helping much of anything. Your general physics homework most likely only gives you, what, maybe 3 or 4 significant figures for the data you’re using in your calculations? Not 6. If your teacher only gives you 9.81 m/s2 and you use a more precise value, chances are, you’re going to get the same rounded answer anyway. You’re just doing more work by writing out extra digits, really.
(And it kinda makes you look like a pretentious asshole.)
In my limited undergraduate experience, chemists seem to be the true hard-asses when it comes to using the correct amount of significant figures, with the obvious exception of the professor for my upper-level physics labs. I learned to appreciate the beauty (albeit, pain in the ass) of propagating uncertainty during the grueling double-lab experience of analytical chemistry. For example, reporting a result that claims 0.00002% error when the error is actually 2% is not just wrong, but it is dishonest in how misleading it is. Which is a big deal in academia.
I’m not saying this to put those people down. On the contrary; I sometimes end up using very precise data in my QM homework problems for the simple reason that my professor or textbook didn’t provide those numbers so I had to look them up. And I can’t just cut off digits for convenience or what have you. I have to use the number I found and cite it (the citation being the most important step, here).
All I’m saying is, the point of that post was to jab people who grossly approximate to the point of missing actually important details within the precise standardized value. For plenty of purposes, 6 digits of precision are more than is necessary to the point of some extra digits becoming meaningless periphery. But 1 digit of precision, with the exception of its utility for quick back-of-the-envelope approximations, in most cases, is definitely not enough.
Rather than bragging about how many sig figs we use, I propose we brag about using the actually appropriate number of sig figs. Let’s be rigorously clear about the true precision of our work! Yeah!