acanthoplus discoidalis

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Armoured Bush Cricket (Acanthoplus discoidalis)

… AKA Armoured Ground katydid, Bradyporinae, a subfamily of the katydid family (Tettigoniidae). The species is native to parts of Namibia, Botswana, Zimbabwe and South Africa. 

Acanthoplus discoidalis is a wide-bodied, flightless species that typically grows to a body length of about 5 cm. The pronotum bears several sharp, conical spines. The mandibles, or main biting jaws, are powerful; they can inflict a painful nip and they permit the insect to feed on material such as tough herbage or carrion.

Another defense against predators is reflex bleeding (also called “autohaemorrhaging” in which the insects squirt haemolymph from pores in their exoskeleton, achieving a range of a few centimetres…

(read more: Wikipedia)

photographs: SoniaSoma and RudiBosbouer

A BRIEF SUMMARY AS TO WHY I THINK THE ACANTHOPLUS DISCOIDALIS (AKA THE ARMOURED GROUND CRICKET) IS CRAZY AS HECK

I COULDN’T RESIST SHARING WHAT I’VE LEARNED ABOUT THIS SOUTH AFRICAN NIGHTMARE SO JUST SIT BACK AND APPRECIATE HOW AWESOME THIS INSECT IS, JUST LOOK AT THIS GUY’S BOD FOR CRYING OUT LOUD

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  • These fat-bodied dudes look MEAN AS HELL and can grow up to approximately 5cm in size
  • The thorax and legs are covered in sharp spines AND THEY HAVE REALLY STRONG JAWS FOR BITING
  • They regurgitate food they have just eaten to deter predators (YES THEY LITERALLY VOMIT UP THEIR LAST MEAL TO PROTECT THEMSELVES)
  • Another of their defence mechanisms is to secrete their toxic, foul-smelling, pale green blood through gaps in their body (HELL no)
  • WHICH BRINGS ME ONTO MY NEXT POINT: after they spray their blood, these guys are pretty thorough in cleaning up… BECAUSE THE SMELL OF THEIR BLOOD MIGHT ATTRACT MORE ARMOURED GROUND CRICKETS WHO WILL TURN CANNIBALISTIC AND DEVOUR IT
  • IMAGINE HAVING TO HASTILY CONCEAL ANY INJURY THAT DREW BLOOD IN CASE A LOAD OF RAVENOUS PEOPLE HUNTED YOU DOWN AND ATE YOU
  • WHEN DEPRIVED OF PROTEIN AND SALT, THEY TURN CANNIBALISTIC
  • JESUS CHRIST
  • CANNIBAL CRICKETS

In conclusion: this is one hardcore motherfucker

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