abusing sarcasm

i honestly get so frustrated seeing karamels being like “omg he made her breakfast in bed!!!! so abusive *sarcasm* lmaooo @ antis!!” 

because guess what? abusers aren’t abusive 24/7. my mum also cooks me really delicious meals and tells me she loves me every now an then, but that doesn’t change the fact that she hits me and acts like she owns me and guilt trips and manipulates and silences and yells at me basically every single day. not always all at once and sometimes really subtly, but she still does it. just like mon el. so can you please stop invalidating and making fun of abuse victims?

this is not intended to be hateful in any way, i’m literally just trying to get y’all to understand our point of view and stop treating this as some kind of joke.

Something tragic I noticed in Skin Deep

I am sure other Rumbelle fans may have noticed this long before I did but I just noticed this and thought I should share it.

First I’m going to flash back here to season two when we saw Milah mock Rumplestiltskin with her pirate friends at the tavern.  Later when she’s hung over (despite how she treated him) human Rumplestiltskin offers her a cup of tea but she does not take it.

(Ironic that there are some haters who insist this guy somehow abused her. She left their child home alone with a fire while she mocked her disabled husband to pirates.  And later when she’s hung over he tries to give her tea.   Sooooo abusive.  That’s sarcasm, by the way…)

Anyway…

In Season four during the AU where he is “The Light One” it’s Belle who offers him a cup of tea to help clear his thoughts. 

He ends up dropping it and it becomes that universe’s chipped cup.

The point here is that tea has always had a special significance to Rumple before he even became the imp, before even Belle’s chipped cup.

Now back to Skin Deep.  After Rumplestiltskin kicks Belle out we see Rumple alone at his spinning wheel when Regina barges in.  He was not expecting her that day.  She’s there to discuss “a certain little mermaid.” 

However…  look at the tea he has out.  Rumple had two tea cups ready.  I think he was hoping that despite having kicked her out, that Belle would again return and he could make amends over a cup of tea, as he would have when he was mortal.

Look. There are two cups.  He wasn’t expecting Regina.  They both make that clear.  She just helped herself to the tea.   So who was that second cup for? 

He was hoping Belle would return.  He wanted to talk to her, he wanted to be the one to serve her tea.

And what is the first thing he does for Belle in the very first episode of Season two?  Well, it’s interrupted by the heroes barging into his shop but he’s preparing her that tea finally.

I think that after Rumplestitlskin kicked Belle out in Skin Deep he kept setting out two cups and tea in case she’d come back, hoping she’d come back.   And after he believed her to be dead he would have given anything to have that cup of tea with her…  

It was always there in the back of his mind so when they were finally reunited it was the first thing he did with her, besides admitting he loves her.

When he serves you tea it’s his way of apologizing or an act of humility.  In any event it seems to be his go to instinct for “making things right.”

I wonder if that’s something child Rumple got from the spinsters who raised him, that when things are bad, or you are fighting with someone, pour them a cup of tea.  Tea makes everything better.  Even the AU Belle set it.  “Things always look better after a nice cup of tea.”

  • anti-self-diagnosis group: Self-diagnosis is bad, and harms the community.
  • anti-self-diagnosis group: Doctors are infallible, and never make mistakes. Negligence, human-error, malpractice; these things do not exist.
  • anti-self-diagnosis group: and people who hold out on describing parts of their illness to doctors are bad and harm the community
  • anti-self-diagnosis group: I have never heard of psychosis, anxiety, or paranoia, which could cause a person to not want, or know how, to be honest with a doctor.
  • anti-self-diagnosis group: but I'm pretty sure psychotic people harm the mental illness community too, by being too crazy to go to and properly describe their symptoms to doctors like normal, civilized, non-psychotic people.
  • anti-self-diagnosis group: and everyone can afford to see a doctor.
  • anti-self-diagnosis group: so I'm sure poor people are harming our community as well.
  • anti-self-diagnosis group: and oppression isn't real so there has definitely never been under-diagnosis, over-diagnosis, or misdiagnosis of people based on gender, race, sexual orientation, class, or anything else.
  • anti-self-diagnosis group: All these groups, and more, are harming the mental illness community because doctors are infallible sweetie. (:

anonymous asked:

tbh mon el is toxic and abusive and manipulative and just really dishusting. like how dare he appreciate kara? how dare he respect her and her boundries? how dare he tell her he likes her and kiss her wow what a monster :/ the worst and most problematic of it all is how he compliments her and wants her to be safe :/// abusive

Haha exactly!! How dare he care about her safety and feel the urge to protect her?? How dare he respect her feelings and not pressure her into reciprocating his? How dare he admire her like no one else does and think she deserves to be treated like a queen?? How dare he think that she is so good that he feels like he may not deserve her?? How dare he constantly tell her how much it means to him that she believed in him and how much he learned from her?? How dare he make mistakes like everyone else does and then acknowledge them, apologizing and learning from the whole thing??? He sounds horribly abusive, doesn’t he??

But sarcasm aside, anyone who thinks Mon-El is abusive must have never interacted with people in real life. Every single person you become close to will, sooner or later, do or say something that you don’t like or that hurts you. It’s inevitable because people aren’t perfect. That doesn’t mean they’re abusive. Of course, Kara and Mon-El fight and they BOTH say stuff that they don’t mean and they both call each other on their bullshit but ultimately they admire, support and build each other up. They’re also more than capable of admitting they’re wrong, apologizing and growing from the experience so yeah. That’s not abusive. That’s how relationships work and that’s how people learn from each other.