abuse victims attracting abusers is a myth, abusers target victims, and it’s 100% abusers fault no matter who they abuse. you are not responsible for “making sure you don’t act in a way that could make someone want to abuse you” or for “making sure you don’t attract abusive people”, it’s on them to not fucking target and take advantage of the first person who has trouble standing up to them and saying no, who is scared of confrontation, who was groomed into pleasing and putting others first, who is still trying to find themselves and put themselves together, who doesn’t know how to demand and ask other than to offer all of their affection and support while asking nothing in return and being happy with whatever they get. these people just need proper family! someone who would protect them and allow them to build boundaries and learn they never need to offer more than they get and that they’re safe and valued and wanted and accepted just the way they are, taking advantage of someone so fragile and scared and wounded and hurting them even more in order to gain power and satisfaction is cruel and vile and abusers should go to hell for it, and whoever thought that victims should take responsibility for “attracting abusers” can also go to hell, blame fucking abusers, shame abusers for taking advantage, let them know they need to pay for what they’ve done and change their ways if they wish to keep existing, leave victims in peace
Hi! So I'm writing a character whose father has bpd and disruptive mood dysregulation disorder- the father has an explosive temper and is very controlling (he's not bad from his disorders, they just show the "type" of emotional abuse that would happen- not everyone with bpd and dmdd are horrible people) and I'm trying to figure out if someone could get ptsd from growing up with a father like that, and what symptoms would most likely be there from the constant splitting/ "eggshell" personality.