The leading notion is that you do, that forgiveness is some kind of magical salvation. It isn’t. Maybe you’ll forgive them one day, but it’s not the place to start. Thinking about forgiving your abusive parents is just doing more of what has already damaged you, focusing on them. They conditioned you to focus on them and their needs your entire life and to ignore yourself and what you need. So the starting point friends, is not to focus more on them, but to focus on yourself. They were bad parents and they left you with a lot of work to do. You have to teach yourself everything they failed to teach you, like how to take care of yourself inside, how to know what you need, how to stand up for yourself, how to have healthy boundaries and how to have healthy relationships. If you get to a point where you feel like you can forgive them, awesome, but it is by no means the most important part of healing from abuse. Quite honestly, I’m not sure it needs to be a part of healing from the abuse at all. What I am sure of however, is that it is not the place to start. Don’t start with them. Start with you. For the first time in your life, make yourself the most important thing.
y'all are so anti-cop, i just wanna know, what are you gonna do if/when someone robs you? assaults you? breaks the law? if someone broke into your house and started stealing all your stuff, would you just sit there and say "yep, take all of it. i'm not going to call the police because they're all rotten pigs, but i'm just going to let this person take all my shit." ??????