Please Don’t Leave Me - A Sammy Wilk Imagine
Why am I so ugly? I asked myself over and over again as I scrolled through the comments on Sam’s most recent picture. It was the two of us goofing around backstage at one of their events. A lot of the comments were rude and hurtful.
@ _lynna: Eww Sam. why are you even friends with her?
@ youreworstnightmare: she’s so ugly
@ stassiebaby: @ abbigator, i hope you know that sam is mine and that he’ll never ever like someone as ugly and fat as you. he’s not even your friend. he’s just using you.
Those were just some of the comments I read. Stassie was supposed to be my friend but it was now obvious to me that she never wanted to be friends. She just wanted Sam.
I took one last look at myself and threw my phone across my room, watching as it bounced of the floor, hit the wall and shattered into a hundred little pieces. I curled myself up in a ball and stayed like that for as long as I could remember. Maybe she was right. Sam probably didn’t even like me at all. Maybe he just tolerated me because of our parents. They had been best friends since they were little so it was like an obligation to stay best friends with Sam.
I sighed and stood up. If Sam wanted to hang around with her then he was so much more than welcome to. I couldn’t get in his way or stop him from doing so. In fact, I knew I was never going to stand in anyone’s way ever again .
I walked to my bathroom and stared at myself in the mirror. You’re so fat and ugly. Those words kept repeating themselves in my head I examined every inch of my body in disgust for how it made me look and feel. I never was all that confident with my body and after reading the comments earlier, it weakened me even more. I felt as if I could never be loved.
Making a final decision, I grabbed a bottle of pills and looked at them. Maybe these will finally do the trick. I though to myself as I unscrewed the lid. I’ve attempted to end it multiple times but each time, Sam had stopped me or something didn’t work right.
I dumped the remaining contents into my hand and sighed. This is it. Your last move.Swallowing these basically guarantees you’ll be free of the hate and free from getting in Sam’s way of being happy. I placed my hand up to my mouth and took a deep breath. Here goes nothing.
I waited at my house for Abigail to show up at my house. We had a plan to make Saturdays free for some best friend bonding time. What we did on those days was whatever managed to happen as we went through the day. Except today. We planned for today to be our Movie Day but she never returned my calls but I immediately knew something was wrong when she didn’t reply to my texts.
I went on Instagram to follow some people back and that’s when I saw it. All the hate comments. The one that mad me really angry was the one from Stassie. I couldn’t believe someone who claimed to be Abigail’s best friend would turn on her so easily.
After I read through the comments, I was more than pissed off. I knew exactly what as going to happen. I quickly grabbed my car keys and threw my shoes on before running out to my car and driving away. It only took me less than 5 minutes to get to her house because of how scared I was. When I got there, I hopped out of the car quickly and ran in. I checked everywhere and she was nowhere to be seen so I went to check her bathroom. The door was locked and my heart started pounding even harder. I found a pin in her bedroom and pick-locked it just how she had taught me when we were little. When I finally got the door open, my mouth dropped.
I put the handful of pills up to mouth and as the hit my tongue, Sam ran in the bathroom. He made me spit them all out and I watched as they were washed down the drain. Sam looked at me with tears in his eyes.
“Abby, why would you do that?”
“B-because your fans hate me and I’m ug-ugly.” I sobbed.
“Don’t you ever say that word again. It’s an ugly word itself and doesn’t even come close to how beautiful you are.”
“But Sam, I’m fat. Look at me. I’m hideous.”
“Abby, no you’re not. Fuck. Stop bringing yourself down.”
“It’s not fair Sam. Your fans bring me down so why can’t I do it to myself?”
“My ‘fans’ are idiots and they’re just jealous they don’t get to spend time with me like you do.”
“But what about Stassie? She spends just as much time with you as I do, maybe even more. Plus, she’s thin and gorgeous.”
“Yeah so? She may be skinny and she’s pretty but her true colors were shown today after I posted that picture.”
“I just don’t get it.” I sighed and sat on the edge of the tub. “How could she act so fake?”
“I don’t know but I want to know something.”
“Do you believe anything she said?”
“Yeah I do. I believe that I’m fat, ugly, that you’ll never like me, and that you’re not really my friend.”
“Don’t believe a word she says please? So what you may not be the skinniest girl in the world or even the most beautiful but-”
“Oh thanks Sam.” I said sarcastically as I rolled my eyes.
“Let me finish.” He sighed and sat net to me before continuing. “You may not be the skinniest or the most beautiful girl in the world but that doesn’t matter at all to me. When I look at you, I don’t see and ugly person or a fat person. What I see is my super amazingly beautiful best friend who I love with all my damn heart. I hate seeing you so depressed like this. Also, don’t you ever say I hate you or that I don’t care because when you didn’t answer my texts and I saw the comments, I got so worried and scared you’d actually leave me this time. It broke my heart to see how close you were to actually succeeding. I never want to see you this upset ever again. If the fans are bothering you or if someone from school is bothering you, tell me and I’ll take care of it, okay?”
“O-okay.” I mumbled. Sam pulled me into a tight hug and I hugged him back right away.’
“I’m so glad you’re okay.” he mumbled. “Don’t ever scare me like that again.”
“O-okay.” I mumbled into his chest. “Please don’t leave me.”
“I don’t plan on it.” he whispered into my ear and kissed my head. “I’ll never leave your side until the day I die.”
I just want to point out that I have nothing against Stassie at all.