If the Sternritters received an anonymous Valentine’s Day card...
As requested by anon. :)
It’s Valentine’s Day! And the following Sternritter have received a really gushy love note…which was sent anonymously. How will they react?
PePe: This absolutely OUTRAGEOUS
PePe: Only one Valentine’s Card??
PePe: A guy like me should receive HUNDREDS
PePe: …especially since I sent out that many.
2. As Nodt
As Nodt: …
As Nodt: For only the second time in my life, the loneliness has been temporarily…lifted.
As Nodt: I will carry this card with me forever.
[the wind immediately snatches it out of his hands and the card goes tumbling away]
As Nodt: OH COME ON
BG9: I do not accept that this letter is anonymous.
BG9: I will use my data collection skills to figure out who sent it!!!!
BG9: Now…who can I torture?
Omaeda: …not sure you really understand this holiday, dude.
Bazz-B: FUCK YEAH A VALENTINE’S DAY CARD
Bazz-B: What a second! This card has a ROOSTER on it!
Bazz-B: And it’s addressed to “Rooster Dude”!!
Bazz-B: I KNOW YOU SENT THIS, ABARAI
Bambietta: What’s this? Some LOSER sent me a Valentine’s Day card?
Bambietta: Ha! What love-sick puppy thought himself worthy to send me a card!
[Bambietta opens the card, which features her dead body with hearts around it]
Giselle: This card isn’t even written in blood.
Giselle: Can’t help but think this person didn’t even really try.
Bambietta: WAIT IS MY CARD WRITTEN IN *BLOOD*?!?
Gerard: What a miraculous coincidence this is! Receiving a Valentine’s Day card on this, Valentine’s Day!
Ishida: That isn’t so much a coincidence as it is…not a coincidence.
Gerard: Such a fabulous miracle!
Ishida: WOULD YOU STOP THAT
Ishida (reading): “Anonymously yours, Ichigo”
Ishida: HOW IS HE THE HERO
Askin: I mean…I could try to figure out who sent this.
Askin: Analyze the handwriting…look at word choice…apply psychology or whatever.
Askin: But that sure sounds like a lot of work.
10. Cang Du
Cang Du: Cards of a romantic nature are intended to reveal romantic feelings.
Cang Du: Sending such a card anonymously is…pointless.
Cang Du: Why would someone do this?
Hitsugaya: Maybe to be nice?
Cang Du: I just don’t understand.
Yhwach: I can’t help but feel that “fuck you” is not an appropriate Valentine’s Day message.
Candice: This card is so sappy and pleading!
Candice: Yeah…I still got it.
Meninas: A card, huh? I guess I’ll put it with the others!
Candice: The others? How many cards have you gotten??
Meninas: Um….about 47, so far.
Candice: WAIT WHAT
Lille: I am the ultimate Quincy, the envoy of god. To think that I can be won over by a Peanuts Valentine’s Day card? Ridiculous.
Lille: I will be extra hateful, just to show them.
Gremmy: What’s this? A Valentine’s Day card the size of a building, huh?
Gremmy: Guess somebody loves me a lot!
Kenpachi: Did you make that yourself?
Gremmy: What? No! Somebody made this FOR me who loves me!
Kenpachi: Kinda looks like something you’d make.
Gremmy: ‘Cause my secret admirer knows what I like!
Kenpachi: The text is glowing and moving. Pretty sure that’s impossible without your powers.
Gremmy: N-no it’s not! SOMEBODY JUST LOVES ME
Kenpachi: Now it’s kind of awkward.
Gremmy: WOULD YOU JUST GO ALREADY