really tho i’m so tired of seeing those posts that r like “stop trying for people who don’t show any effort” because like…….idk bout any of u but i’m emotionally n mentally screwed and sometimes it is very -very- hard for me to show someone that i genuinely want their time and attention because the only thing my mind is set to when trying to get close to them is ‘don’t get too close. they’ll hurt u. push urself away. be distant. whats the point if they’ll only leave anyway.’ and i can’t help that…..? i mean yea i’m trying to get better with it but seeing those posts jus make me feel like such shit for it, its so tiring lol
Sometimes when I’m out and about and everything seems kind of boring and gray, I look around at the other people passing me by and think “none of them know just how much Santa Claus porn I’ve written” and that’s one thought to smile at–but then the second thought is that I’m just assuming that they haven’t written more Santa Claus porn than me, and that, ultimately, there’s just no way to know that when you see a stranger. And that usually makes me laugh
oh no, Meet Cute With Cats (which needs a better, more literary title) is from Nirvana in Fire, the first part of the Consort MCS AU, and is called that because … they meet cute and there’s a cat. Then there’s like twenty thousand words of politics. And MCS becomes defacto empress, bitching loudly all the way.