a-spune

/
—  ~ Da, l-am iubit. Atât de mult încât nici măcar nu pot realiza acum cât de mult și nu pot explica, nu pot înțelege  eram atât de apropiată de el,  fiecare îmbrățișare îmi era balsam pentru suflet,  mi se citea iubirea în priviri,  simțeam un nod în gât atunci când îl priveam,  mă simțeam întreagă atunci când îl îmbrățișam. L-am iubit atât de mult încât mă sperie acum ideea de a fi iubit pe cineva cu atâta putere, de a crede într-un om fără urmă de teamă, de a dărui tot, de a-l face pe el centrul gândurilor mele și rațiunea mea de a fi. L-am iubit atât de mult încât aș putea scrie cărți despre toate acele sentimente, despre cât am suferit, despre cât am iubit. Și acum? Acum sunt goală pe dinăuntru și nu mai regăsesc, oricât aș căuta, acea iubire. Pentru că am înțeles că oricât ai iubi un om, distanța își spune cuvântul la un moment dat, iar ochii care nu se văd chiar se uită. Sunt convinsă acum de asta, de faptul că mi-au trebuit ani să-l uit, dar că acum el nu mai face parte din mine. A fost cândva, un vis frumos, acum îmi rămân doar pagini întregi scrise despre el și multe alte cuvinte în minte…
Nu sunt genul ăla de fată lipicioasă. N-o să-ți trimit niciodată mesaje prima. Dă-mi mesaj să vorbim,dacă nu,nu vorbim.Compară-mă cu altă fată şi te poți duce la ea. Nu fac eu niciodată primul pas.Vreau atenție. Fericirea mea e bazată pe atenția ta.Nu mă schimba. Iubeşte-mă aşa cum sunt.Spune-mi lucruri frumoase,dar lucruri pe care tu să le crezi.Vreau fapte,multe fapte şi nu doar vorbe.Nu-mi promite nimic dacă ştii că o să rămână doar promisiuni.Când plâng doar taci şi stânge-mă în brațe. O să-ți fac crize de gelozie pentru că ştiu cât de uşor sunt de înlocuit şi ştiu că ai putea găsi în orice moment,pe cineva mai bun.Sunt bipolară. Acum te iubesc şi în minutul următor te dau dracu,dar dacă mă cunoști,vei şti că am zis-o la nervi.O să mă supăr repede dar dacă ştii cum să mă împaci,n-o să fie o problemă. Nu vreau să te culci niciodată seara ştiind că m-ai supărat. Dacă nu fac eu primul pas,fă-l tu,indiferent de cine a greşit.
Şi cel mai important..să nu pleci. Să nu renunți la mine din prima.
Poate nu merit tot efortul ăsta, sau poate că da💖
Cu unii am fost prea bun si i-am tratat la modu’ grav,la cel mai bun mod posibil aratandu-le ca imi pasa prin fapte frate,nu doua vorbe goale care nu cantaresc nimic,si au plecat.
Cu altii am fost cea mai haotica persoana,mi-au vazut partile intunecate,si tot ce au simtit,toti nervi,i-au simtit pe pielea lor.
Surpriza,sunt inca aici.
Deci spune-mi tu,matroane,ar mai fii ceva de spus?
—  Intalnire prin trecut cu prezentu’ 1/10
Cât de mult mă iubeşti?

– Mă iubești? întreabă ea.
– Da, răspunde el.
– Cât de mult?
– De când se măsoară iubirea?
– Din acest moment, hai, fă-mi pe plac, te rog. Cât de mult? Se apropie de el, cât să-l poată privi în ochi, prin semi-întunericul din cameră.
– Fie, dar n-am să-ți pot oferi numere, procente, termeni de comparație concreți. Pot să-ți spun atât: te iubesc suficient de mult încât să fiu motivat să devin cel mai bun bărbat din viața ta.
– Ia-mă în brațe și ține-mă acolo o viață, îi spune ea, în timp ce un zâmbet cald îi apărea pe chip.
– Voi încerca să nu te pierd, dar nu-ți pot promite că am să reușesc, îi spune el în timp ce brațele i-au devenit culcușul ei. Poate că, la un moment dat, nu voi mai reprezenta bărbatul pe care-l dorești astăzi cu ardoare. Iar eu … eu n-am să mă opun fericirii tale, chiar dacă nu voi mai face parte din ea.
– Oprește-te! Nu vreau nimic special. Vreau doar să mă lași să fiu, la rândul meu, cea mai bună femeie din viața ta. Și nu te îngrijora că nu vei mai fi în planurile mele, căci nu cred că aș mai putea include un alt bărbat în ele. Lângă tine, am tot ce are nevoie o femeie pentru a fi fericită.
– Da? Și de ce anume ai tu nevoie să fii, și eventual să și rămâi, fericită?
– Dragul meu, cred că aș putea să-ți fac o listă lungă de astfel de ”cerințe”, dar mă voi rezuma, la fel ca și tine, doar la câteva cuvinte: să mă iubești din tot sufletul.
– O fac deja, răspunde el ridicând din umeri.
– Iar eu sunt fericită. E simplu. Continuă astfel și voi rămâne a ta. Iar eu, te asigur, îți voi oferi tot ce am mai bun. Știu foarte bine că oferind, voi primi. Apropo, azi mi-a spus o prietenă că, de când te cunosc pe tine, zâmbesc altfel.
– Cum altfel?
– Mai din suflet, așa mi-a spus. Și cred că are dreptate pentru că uneori simt și eu că mi-e inima fericită.
– Mă bucur, iubito!
– În spatele zâmbetului unei femei, se află un bărbat hotărât să o facă fercită

Și cândva, prietenii te vor întreba:
- De ce nu sunteți împreună dacă ea e atât de specială pentru tine?!
Iar tu, scoțând fum din țigară, cu chipul mâhnit vei spune:
- Am fost un prost, și am pierdut-o.
Nu imi spune ca m-am indepartat pentru ca imi este imposibil sa o fac.Niciodata nu ma voi indeparta de persoanele la care tin dar daca ele o fac,eu nu mai am nimic de facut in legatura cu asta.
3

Bad Habit

(Pietro x Reader) (M) 

You got yourself a (real) bad habit for him.

Spune că ești al meu /Say you’re mine 

Let me know what you think I have a few parts for this already. :) x

Requests  Masterlist

Part 1

Last night’s dreams fading away, your eyes slowly opened to bright sunlight and the soft snores of the man lying beside you. Your heart skipped a beat when you felt his strong arms holding you tightly, his chest pressed against your back; almost like he couldn’t let you go.  

For a few moments you let yourself imagine you were an actual couple lying in each others arms. These mornings were the only time you saw him so relaxed, calm. Even now you could feel the small vibrations on his skin as you ran your fingers lightly over his forearm.

Pietro stirred a little, pushing closer into you his erection digging into the small of your back. Instinctively you pushed back against him, rubbing softly. He moaned your name and you felt yourself getting worked up all over again.

Sliding your hand between your bodies, you began running your fingers over him lightly up and down teasing him. He pulled you closer resting his head on your shoulder, his hot breathy moans against your neck turning you on and making your skin tingle.

While you increased the pressure with your fingers, you moved your body over him and started to kiss his neck, pushing him onto his back gently.

What was it going to take to wake him up? A lustful smile on your lips you worked your way down his chest, nipping him and leaving marks. Still he didn’t wake.

You stopped as you reached his navel, moving your hands to stroke his thighs and kiss his stomach, running your tongue over his v line. Paying attention everywhere except where he wanted you.  

Pietro’s hips lifted off the bed impatiently trying to find contact, his hands squeezing the sheets. You knew he was pretending now.  

Sitting back, you stopped touching him completely and just watched him. Your hands drifting to your breasts and lower as you watched him, loving the effect you were having on him.  

Waiting until the last second before he opened his eyes, you reached forward taking him in your mouth making him grunt in surprise and grab your hair.  

“Fuck y/n.”

“Good morning.” You breathed out before taking as much of him in your mouth as you could, running your tongue up and down his length, your hands working on the rest.

Pietro’s hips moved faster his head back in pleasure as he arched his back, thrusting into your mouth. Words you couldn’t understand left his lips between moans, turning you on even more, the wetness between your legs dripping down your inner thigh.

This wasn’t you. Before you met you were usually so quiet and reserved, nothing like this person he had turned you into. You wanted him all the time, constantly craving his touch.    

It was your own fault really, when it came to Pietro you couldn’t help yourself. You were completely in love with him.  

Pietro still didn’t open his eyes, lost in the pleasure you were giving him. For you, watching him almost undone was unbearable, you needed him inside you. You stopped what you were doing again and he writhed on the bed reaching for you.

“Y/n? Don’t stop.”

“Open your eyes Pietro.”

You wanted him to see you, really see you. Somehow read your mind and see all the love you kept inside. For him to feel as overwhelmed by every touch, every look.  

You straddled him and ran your hands along his biceps stopping to lean over and kiss his scars. The action always drove him crazy and he pulled you up the rest of the way his lips crashing onto yours in a sloppy kiss.  

“What have you done to me?” Pietro whispered and for a second you thought you saw what you were looking for in his eyes, but it never lasted. They clouded over with lust, just as they always did.  

He grabbed your hair, pulling your head to the side exposing your neck to him and he kissed it roughly. His other hand kneading your breast as you ground yourself onto him, moaning.

“You like that? You want me amor?”

Pietro kissed his way down to your other breast biting down on your nipple and you moaned even louder.

“Pietro, please…”

You held onto him in anticipation as his fingers caressed your ass, slowly trailing around until he finally stroked you, teasing you this time. Hardly using any pressure as he stroked your folds, his thumb tracing achingly slow circles on your clit.

You wriggled out of his grasp before his fingers could enter you and Pietro smirked at your impatient actions, but you were too far gone, too desperate to have him inside you.

“So impatient sweet-“  

You cut him off grabbing his cock with a smirk of your own. Positioning yourself over him you lower yourself down onto him slowly, savoring the feel of him finally filling you. This you would make the most of.  

“Fuck Pietro…”  

Pietro’s eyes never leave you as he watches you, his hands drifting up your sides and to your breasts as you begin slowly sliding up almost to the tip and back down onto him, over and over.  

It was too slow for Pietro. His hands gripped your hips, pulling you into him deeper as he thrust upwards. You leaned back resting your hands on his thighs, the sounds of both your moans and the feeling of him moving inside you almost too much.    

“So fucking tight, you feel so good.” Pietro moaned, he was getting close. His thrusts were getting sloppy and he was losing control, the vibrations getting stronger as he struggled to control his speed. It only added to your pleasure though. You felt them to your core adding to the already building fire.

Pietro grabbed you by the hips, turning you over so you were lying on your back looking up at him breathlessly. He spread your legs running his hand along your thighs and hooking them under your knees pulling them up around his waist.

Your hips lifted off the mattress to meet him as he leaned over you, his hands moving to grip your ass pulling you as close as he could. He kisses you hungrily, claiming your mouth and rubs himself along your wet slit a few times, thrusting into you roughly with a growl.  

You run your tongue along his bottom lip, biting it and raking your nails down his back making him growl again and he pounds into you, deeper and harder. Both of you getting close, his fingers fingers rub your clit, vibrating them. His mouth finds yours again stifling your moans.

“Come for me, y/n.”  

Just hearing those words sent you over the edge. You cried out, clinging onto him almost screaming his name as he bucked into you, trying to draw out every last bit of pleasure he could give you before reaching his own high.

“Say it,” he demanded, “spune că ești al meu.”

“I’m yours Pietro.” You managed to whisper still caught up in the sensation of your orgasm, a new wave of pleasure filling you as Pietro came with a delicious moan.

His body was shaking and his breathing heavy as you stroked his back, calming the vibrations as he lay on top of you peppering your face with kisses. Your own breathing out of control as you both finally slowed down.  

You wrapped yourself around him your head resting on his chest listening to his still rapid heartbeat while he played with your hair his fingers drawing circles on your back.

Pietro always needed to hear those words. The first few times you thought they meant something. You lay still a while just trying not to think about what was going to happen.  

He peeled your arms and legs off him and you groaned, louder than you meant to.  

“Just a little longer.” You pleaded.

Chuckling he kissed the top of your head before giving you a squeeze and making his way to the bathroom. You bit your lip at the sight of his toned body and he turned to give you a smug look.

“Like what you see printessa?”

“Maybe.” You whispered and rolled your eyes.  

“I do.”  His eyes roam over your body, biting his lip when they land on your breasts, you have to turn away blushing under his gaze.

Warm hands squeeze your breasts and you squeal in surprise, Pietro already back at the bathroom door, pretending to look innocent.

“Mmm boobies.”  

You giggled, about to retort when your stomach grumbled and you glared at Pietro laughing at you, “Looks like I gave you quite an appetite?”

“What do you fancy-?”  

“Round three?” He poked his head around the door with a mischievous smile.

“I meant for breakfast.”  

“So did I,” He winked and disappeared into the bathroom, “I can still make you blush.”  

You were at your lowest when Bucky and Steve had brought you to the tower and into their protection. You should have been a lost cause at that point and it still baffled you how they saw so much potential in you. It was a while before you met the other avengers, you spent weeks preparing and training with Bucky and Steve.

Pietro made an instant impression on you. The way he kissed your hand when you met, the little things he did for you, his constant flirting and attempts at making you smile; they all wore you down. In those first few weeks your face was almost a permanent red.

Against all your instincts you let him in, let yourself start to fall for him.  

Your first mission ended badly your powers still unpredictable and although the objective was reached, it left you feeling like a failure, convinced you didn’t belong. Usually you would go to Bucky or Steve for advice, this time Pietro had found you moping.  

You watched movies, listened to music, laughed and talked for hours, finally kissing and him speeding you away to his room.

It was amazing and you thought you had something, that he felt the same, until you saw him all over a busty office girl the next day not even acknowledging you. God you felt so stupid.  

Looking back you were so naive, how did you not realize you were just another conquest?

You avoided him as much as you could, focusing on training, but you couldn’t get him off your mind. That was always your trouble.

A few weeks later you found yourself drunk at another useless Stark party. Pissed off and alone, he pulled you in again and one thing led to another, you didn’t even make it back to the tower. That night was the start of everything, you took every opportunity to be together, anywhere you could - even on missions.  

He was always kind, always up front that he wasn’t ready for a relationship. So you ignored that niggling voice inside your head telling you that you deserved better, that he would hurt you. You told yourself it was ok every time he walked away. Every time you saw him with another girl. He had to fall for you eventually right?  

Wrong, so fucking wrong.

Lying there naked in his bed – again, you listened to the shower the smell of sex still lingering all over you and burst into tears.  

This had to stop.

You pick up your clothes from where they were discarded the night before and shrug on your underwear and t-shirt.  You head for the door, freezing when Pietro starts singing from inside the shower.  

You wanted to join him, so badly. You literally ached for him yet your hand still closed over the handle, gently pulling door open.  

Quietly you run along the corridors to your room. You threw the dirty clothes into the basket and jumped into the shower, letting the hot water wash his scent from your skin.  

Sitting on the edge of the bed, your still wet hair dripped onto you, joining the tears from your eyes. You gripped the bed to stop your hands shaking, hardly able to breathe as you typed the message you had put off sending for months. 

You were filled with guilt, you should be telling him this to his face not over a text. It was the only way. One kiss, one smile would be all it took. Taking a deep breath you finally pressed send watching the little spinning circle, there was no going back now.

Cursing you threw the phone away and watched it clatter on to the floor. You buried yourself in the warm covers in a vain attempt at staving off the overwhelming sadness, guilt and dread building inside you.  

“I can’t do this anymore. I’m sorry.”