Hi!! I’m having really bad anxiety
right now and I was wondering if you could do a reader and dean to the song
another day by meat loaf a little angst and lots of fluff? Could the reader be
dealing with that too? Thanks sweetie!! Your stories always help!! Love you
A/N: This may upset some people.
Dean watched as she walked inside the bunker, his heart
aching unsure of what to do. He knew it was getting bad for her. He knew she
wasn’t coping. The signs where there, she was starting to worry about
everything. It was a simple comment to begin with what if the credit card they
tried to pay for the motel on got declined, what if the police car that drove
past was looking for them, what if the reason Dean hadn’t answered the phone
was because the Djinn they were hunting had got him. It all snowballed, the
what if’s. He knew she was struggling.
Life for Y/N was apple pie and picket fences up until a few
years ago. She was a suburban girl, loving parents a pretty little sister and
overprotective big brother. She was popular; fashionable, she modelled for her
Mum’s clothing store catalogues. Dean had met her then, they were both young
every time he went through town and thanks to some round about planning it was
quite a bit, they would meet up. She refused to date him then, he was gone too
much. She didn’t want the strain, but it worked out for the better in the end.
They got to know each other pretty well. A new thing for them both. She was
always so happy and bubbly, she loved life and didn’t have a care in the world.
It changed not long after she turned 23, the first person
she called was Dean. Her Mum was dead and her Dad missing. He watched as the
anxiety of what happened took over, he sat at her place watching as she
struggled to cope. He watched her knee constantly bounce, her hands always
shifting. He looked at the scratches on her legs as they itched with her
stress. His heart broke every time he spoke to her and her soft voice came out
in a harsh tone. He stood by her though he knew this wasn’t easy.
It only got worse when the news came in that it as her Dad
who killed her Mum. She collapsed crying, screaming. It didn’t seem right, not
to either of them. Dean did some digging and found her Dad, dead in a sewer. He
knew then what it was. A shape shifter, he told her then all about his life
what he really did. Why he was gone. He watched that night as his sweet Y/N
left behind her apple pie life and vowed to kill the monster that destroyed her
They found it too late, her brother and sister both killed.
Dean killed the bastard that did this too her. He sat with her as she cried, he
stayed by her for weeks as she struggled to function to move. He considered
getting her help. But knew it was pointless. She was glad in the end that he
never did, Dean was all she needed to get through it. The patience he had for
her, the willingness to be strong when she was weak. It was what she needed.
Her breaking point was when someone called Dean, a demon was
terrorising a small town. Y/N heard what was going on and vowed that day to
never let anyone go through what she did. She followed Dean and became a hunter
herself, Dean watched as she changed, while his girl was still there she was no
longer all about fashion, lipstick and magazines. She was now about the family
business; saving people, hunting things.
Overtime she got better, their relationship grew from
friends to partners, lovers, soul mates and everything in between, he watched
her smile and laugh again. He melted his heart to think she was back. It made
him feel complete again seeing that smile or hearing her soft voice. He soon
realised there was triggers that set it off, times that made it bad. And
triggers that helped. He learn’t them, memorised them and used them. If he could
see something that would set her off he would move hell and high water to avoid
it. He never considered it a burden, he loved this woman more than life itself
and this was nothing to him. No more work than making her a coffee. He got
hopeful that she was coming back to him, the smiles, and the laughs at his
stupid jokes. As she stopped to look during that moments hesitation as they
passed a store. They were all signs of hope.
She loved him all the more for it. Some days she had no idea
how much he did, what he did to avoid those triggers for her. Passing on a case
that might be too much at that time, driving an extra 6 hours to avoid a town
that brings back bad memories, keeping things tidy and clean in the boot,
weapons organised so she felt ready for battle. That she could grab and go
quickly. He did it all. She didn’t realised some days how much he worried. Some
days it was days before she had fought back enough to focus on life again. The
days in between when she lost it, when she collapsed to the floor crying, when
he watched at she wrapped her arms around her chest trying to stop her heart
from running away with the speed that it beat, or the panic over the small
He listened as she sat in the bath and cried, he sat on the
other side of the door his own tears falling. Knowing nothing he did right now
would make her feel better. He knew what she was doing, the same thing he was
praying. She prayed a lot for help. It never came. But it never deterred her,
she prayed every time. For her own healing, for Deans she knew how much this
hurt him. But she couldn’t help it. She knew he wanted to fix it, to save her
to fight her demons for her but he couldn’t. He helped but ultimately there was
nothing he could do.
She sat in the bathroom crying into a now cold bath. This
last case was a mess try as hard as they did and still that family died, still
the poor 7 year old girl lived after watching that damn thing eat her family.
Wendigo. That son of a bitch has ruined that girl’s life, a new wave of tears
fell. What if they got there sooner? What if they hadn’t of stopped at the gas
station for the drink and toilet break? What if they had of moved faster? All
this could have prevented it. Now Y/N knew what she had to do, to get fitter,
move faster, drive quicker. Next time she wont let it happen. Next time…. She
started crying again there would always be a next time, she often wondered what
life would be like if she hadn’t of lost her parents, would she still be who
she was? Wearing latest fashions? Modelling? Helping her Mum in the store?
Would she have ended up with Dean? The man who she loved more than life itself,
the only one who brings light into the darkness, the only one who while he
can’t bring that light permanently can calm her enough in the darkest moments
to try and show her the light.
The tears falling into the water around her, the prayers
being sent, Dean had enough. He couldn’t take it anymore. He opened the door,
looking down at her. He climbed into the bath gasping at the cold water as it
seeped through his jeans. He didn’t care about the clothes; the cold after the
initial shock didn’t bother him. He pulled her back into his arms wrapping her
up. Kissing her head. He held her while she cried. After a while, he pulled her
out the bath. Wrapping her in a robe and carried her to bed. She had tried
herself out. Stripping down and drying off he climbed in next to her, and held
her tight. He felt her heart pounding. He knew she was going through things
that they could have done, what if? He knew she was thinking about quitting,
that she then would hate herself leaving people without help. He knew her mind
was jumping from one thought to another and that she couldn’t focus on any one
thing. That this was making things worse. He reached behind him and grabbed the
stereo remote turning on her music, cranking it up to block out her thoughts.
She started to tell him off, Sam would be trying to sleep by now. But Dean
‘It’s ok Baby, he knows. He understands.’ He rubbed her back, running his hand
through her wet tangled hair. She caved and snuggled in closed. Both knew she
wouldn’t sleep for a few days, but it wouldn’t matter neither would Dean. Not
until the worst was over.
During the worst of these she wonders how she still make it
through, how she will wake tomorrow. So many times she actually thought she was
having a heart attack, so many times she thought her heart would literally jump
from her chest. That the pain in her body would actually kill her. But it never
did, morning came and she was always still here.
Dean kissed her head, her forehead and then her lips. He
missed his girl; he knew she would come back. It was just a matter of when. She
would never be the girl he met all those years ago. No, but it didn’t matter, she
was even more amazing now, more beautiful. She was stronger than anyone he
knew, she was more amazing that any person alive. She battled this daily and
won. Every second of every day she won. The fact that even in the darkest
moments, she was still here made her a winner, a fighter. She sent him into awe
again and again. That first smile she gave, the one that reached her eyes and
showed even for a second that she was there still fighting made his heart
flutter like a school boy.
He lent down and kissed her lips.
‘I love you baby. Yesterday, today, tomorrow, every day.’ He whispered kissing
her again. She fell into a restless sleep waking as the clocked turned to 1 am
she was grateful she had made it through another day.