a while ago actually but still

Kate’s Hiatus Bellarke Playlist: Song 7

All right, fam, here’s the very delayed seventh song of my hiatus Bellarke playlist. It’s an oldie but a goodie. 

If you’re reading this and wondering wtf this is and where, exactly, are the first six songs, click here. Otherwise, keep scrolling or keep reading: up to you.

“Little Do You Know” by Alex & Sierra

I actually first downloaded this song onto my phone a little under two years ago, after I had just finished bingeing Season 1 and 2 and watched a bloody amazing Bellarke fanvideo featuring this song. I couldn’t believe how fitting it was for the couple and I think, while it is particularly revelant for Clarke’s “love is weakness” phase and Bellamy’s angsty phase in Seasons 2 and 3, a lot of it still holds for where their relationship is at currently.

Please remember that I am applying a modern-day song to a post-apocalyptic couple, so the meaning of certain lyrics get applied under different contexts (which means that the way the lyrics are reminiscent of Bellarke might be different than their original intention).

The song is a duet, starting with the girl singing (who is kind of like Clarke) and then the man has his own solo (which is reminiscent of Bellamy). I’ll try to make a point of indicating who is singing what.

Little do you know
How I’m breaking while you fall asleep
Little do you know
I’m still haunted by the memories
Little do you know
I’m tryna pick myself up piece by piece

This is Sierra, the female singer. When I had just finished Season 2, this felt ridiculously applicable to Clarke and her emotional journey. She is plagued by guilt (”haunted by the memories”), so much that she decides to run away at the end of the season. The second line works for the entire series because Clarke’s entire journey has been about her breaking apart and picking herself up again (”I’m tryna pick myself up piece by piece”). And, of course, Clarke tried to heal herself by running away and even admits that it didn’t work, discovering that the only way to truly heal herself is not through isolation but, rather, connection - to her people, her family, the people she loves.

Also, the image of her breaking while her lover “fall[s] asleep” is extremely … vivid. Because we saw that exact scene in 4x03, in which Clarke breaks down while Bellamy is asleep on the couch. Because she’s still haunted by the choices she made that led her to this place, and she’s trying to pick up the pieces but it’s so hard when the fight for survival never seems to end.

Little do you know
I need a little more time 

The timing with Bellarke has never been right, and that’s the tragedy of it all. In Season 2, Clarke was grieving Finn, taking on the mantra “love is weakness” and pushed Bellamy away. She wasn’t ready for anything new, she needed a little more time to heal. It’s why she pushed L.exa away. And then Tondc and Mount Weather and the Grounders’ betrayal made it impossible for her to heal, not for awhile, so she ran away instead. This was supposed to give her the time she needed. All it did was isolate her from her friends and fuck her up even more. 

Season 3 was still Clarke needing time to break away from that “love is weakness” phase and allowing herself to accept that love was strength instead, and we saw her rebuilding her relationships with Bellamy and the others in 3B and Season 4. But by that time the world was ending and there literally was no time to start a relationship (and she was grieving L.exa still). Then, when the timing is almost right … boom. Praimfaya comes and turns back the clock (or … rather, pushes it forward six years).

She needed more time … she got it. That time jump gave Clarke all the time she needed to deal with that baggage from previous seasons. And now, after she’s figured out where she fits in with Bellamy again, NOW the timing will finally be right.

Underneath it all I’m held captive by the hole inside 

This is what I think of in relation to the “love is weakness” ideology of Season 2/3. The hole is where her heart should have been - is - but she’s trying to ignore.

I’ll wait, I’ll wait
I love you like you’ve never felt the pain,
I’ll wait
I promise you don’t have to be afraid,
I’ll wait
The love is here and here to stay
So lay your head on me

This is Alex, the male singer, singing now. I love it because in Season 2 Bellamy was so … I don’t know. Patient with Clarke? Like, he never held anything she did against her, never blamed her when she did anything questionable, didn’t get angry when she hurt him (”I was being weak” anyone?) and instead he stuck by her side and supported her and offered her forgiveness when all anyone seemed to offer her was more guilt. He was there through it all, her constant, her dependable source of stability and just … love. He loved her through it all, even through his anger at her in 3x05. 

And he never tried to push her into a relationship either, I might add. He never made a move, so the “I’ll wait” line ties in nicely. Bellamy will always be there for Clarke, even at the end of the world (HA). 

and then she literally lays her head on him in 4x03 just saying

Little do you know
I know you’re hurting while I’m sound asleep

Bellamy knows that Clarke is in pain. He knows her. And even when he isn’t there (”sound asleep”) he knows what she’s gone through and who she is, as demonstrated by him offering her forgiveness and support in 2x16 despite being separated from her through most of 2B. 

And, of course, we always make fun of Bellamy waking up when Clarke starts to cry in 4x03, because if Clarke’s upset OF COURSE Bellamy is there. But I think it’s a nice visual representation of this line. Even when he isn’t technically present, he’s in tune with Clarke and her emotional state. He just knows her that well.

Little do you know
All my mistakes are slowly drowning me
Little do you know
I’m trying to make it better piece by piece

I don’t know if much more really needs to be said about these lines because we all already are well aware of how much Bellamy beats himself up over his mistakes. And the regret threatens to suffocate him but he continues to fight on and try to make up for his mistakes (even knowing that maybe, just maybe, it will never be enough for him to truly forgive himself). He always tries to be a better man than he was yesterday.

Just your friendly reminder that Bellamy and Clarke are parallel tortured souls.

Little do you know
I, I love you ‘til the sun dies

[Alex & Sierra:]
Oh wait, just wait
I love you like I’ve never felt the pain,
Just wait
I love you like I’ve never been afraid,
Just wait
Our love is here and here to stay
So lay your head on me

Okay, fuck. Just fuck. I love this song even more after watching Praimfaya because this part is so on point. I can’t get the image of Clarke waiting for Bellamy (like in the lyrics) for six fucking years, just to love him like she’s “never felt the pain”, after she’s healed, and as though she’s never been afraid of what love being weakness. She’ll love with a full heart and six years of missing him, now knowing that she never wants to ever let him go again. 

“Our love is here and here to stay”. Oh god. Even after six years it has survived. This is why this song is perfect for them.

I’ll wait (I’ll wait), I’ll wait (I’ll wait)
I love you like you’ve never felt the pain,
I’ll wait (I’ll wait)
I promise you/I don’t have to be afraid,
I’ll wait
The love is here and here to stay
So lay your head on me
Lay your head on me
So lay your head on me

[Alex:]
'Cause little do you know
I, I love you 'til the sun dies

‘Nuff said.

This song is Bellarke af.

Humans in spaaaaace

Had this thought last night as I lay falling asleep. We have all these space-exploration-ensemble shows with a bunch of aliens each of which has some sort of super-human power, more or less. And humans are always given ~leadership~ as their special power. The ability to bring people together, to organize shit, and I always thought, like…what a shitty power. What a shitty colonial “you were a mess until we came in and saved you” power. Drives me nuts. Seems like if an alien species builds a got-damn ship that can fly through got-damn space they probably have their shit together, right? At least somewhat?

So then I figure, what is humanity got to contribute to all these super-beings? We’re just nonsense reckless critters careening through space. Seems like we’d be more trouble than we’re worth.

But what if…I mean, what if that’s us. We’re the universe’s huckleberries. We’ll run headlong into danger, and we’ll *laugh*. And what if…what if we survive and a weirdly abnormally high rate. Like any alien with two bits of math can put together that we should have wiped ourselves out a long time ago with the first set of “hold my beer, and watch this.” So what the shit, how are we still banging around the universe building shit and flying off solar ramps into the sun while doing some spaceship equivalent of an ollie while crushing beer cans on our forehead. Why. Why do we exist.

And then it hits me. We survive. We’re super good at it. Uncannily good at it. So much so that we…I mean, we actually bend probability in our favor. It’s absurd. And it totally falls flat if you actually tell us this (“Never tell me the odds,” said Solo, knowing full well that knowing the odds kills a human’s chances of survival).

So there we are. Careening around the universe. Joining alien crews because they know that with a human on board, especially a cocky human in some kind of leadership position, can warp probability to stretch success in their favor. And they can never ever tell us this. So instead they just pat our heads and tell us we’re just so good at ~leadership~ and that’s what makes humans special

But really…we’re just a bunch of space dinguses.

my taxi driver a few days ago was a Syrian-British immigrant originally from Damascus and his fam is currently living under gov controlled areas. 

he was telling me though they don’t support the government and have never **liked** assad, they are religious minorities who would likely be killed or jailed by various members of the “opposition” should they ever leave–members of his fam had been abducted by unknown factions before and they still hadn’t heard from them and were presumed dead. 

but he was telling me that he couldn’t have these convos in canada without immediately being labeled an “assadist” or “pro-syria” lol even though he literally doesn’t like assad. he was telling me about his non-syrian roommate who was chiding him for not immediately supporting the opposition. 

it had already hit me while ago, but definitely in that moment, i realized how thoroughly we’ve taken this conversation away from Syrians. this guy, who doesn’t even support Assad, who is actually syrian, is being condemned by his non-syrian, never-even-been-to-syria canadian roommate for saying “the opposition will hurt my family” 

we need to seriously take a step back and accept we don’t know better than the actual Syrian community, no matter how many ABC News articles we read, and let them lead this conversation. 

anonymous asked:

“You bake when you’re stressed and sometimes you give me cookies, but recently you’re giving me whole baskets each day, now I’m not complaining but are you okay?” au sterek? <3

OK, I wrote you a quick little thing. :)

now also on ao3

*

When Derek shows up at Stiles’ back door that morning with a basket full of about three dozen cookies, all carefully iced to look like Batman and Spider-Man, Stiles doesn’t say anything. He just gets up from the kitchen table and opens the screen door, and then he looks down at the basket for a long, long moment, and then he rubs the heels of his hands into his eyes and groans.

He looks kind of… unkempt. He’s wearing the same sweatpants and lacrosse hoodie he’d had on two days ago when Derek saw him at his mailbox, and his hair is sticking up everywhere, and it’s obvious he hasn’t shaved in a while because there’s some actual stubble there. Derek didn’t think Stiles was even capable of facial hair. It only adds to his attractiveness, but still, Derek can’t help but be concerned.

Derek doesn’t usually start conversations, but today he feels like making an exception. “Are you okay? This is a lot more baking than usual, even for you.”

“What? What do you mean?” Stiles says, dropping his hands to his sides. His face cycles through about five or six different expressions before settling on something that’s probably trying to say “innocent and oblivious,” but… well. Derek might not know Stiles that well, but he knows Stiles is definitely not either of those things, ever.

“The cookies,” Derek says slowly. “That you leave on my doorstep a few times a week while I’m out on my morning run.”

Stiles glares down at the cookies Derek’s holding like they’ve betrayed him.

“We don’t talk about it,” Derek says slowly, unsure, “but I thought you knew that I knew it was you. I mean, no one else in the neighborhood even talks to me.”

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*Inhale* OKAY, it took me like… an eternity to get that picture done but AH ! I did it ! It’s completed and I’m so proud about how it turned out ! So uhm… you guys requested for a UnderDecay print a while ago. I couldn’t exactly stream it because my internet is really slow lately and I’m kinda sick. BUT I managed to work on it little by little, one character at time and I can say that I actually ENJOYED to draw this… like… there’s so little details and the dynamic and composition were absolutely… gosh I cant even describe it.

I had FUN, especially since UD is my baby and I’ve been working hard on this AU for almost a year now. ANYWAY, I really hope that you enjoy it !

Okay… SO… I’m still without any form of income, so if you guys are interested to get that print shipped at your place you can order one over HERE. Any reblog would actually help me a lot… and gosh… thank you so much for every nice comment and the support that you guys give me. I deeply appreciate it.

Art and UnderDecay© @little-noko

So, okay, thoughts about the Lions and what we learned in Space Mall.

The Black Lion was made of the meteor that hit Zarkon’s home planet. Possibly the home planet of the Galra, which is/was destroyed.

We don’t see the other Lions in that scene. But there’s not a lot of the other relevant elements- it’d be hard for me to imagine say, Green, or Blue, coming from the planet that we see in that flashback which doesn’t seem to have much, if any, liquid water or observable foliage.

Which would suggest that the Lions weren’t all made at the same time, or in the same place- that different meteors struck different planets, and this may have gone according to their elemental affinity, and, possibly, the species of their initial pilots- this would suggest that the home planet of the Yellow Lion was Altea, which would seem to fit- we don’t see much of Altea, but Coran did say it rained stones. Altea- or rather, “Arus” in Defender of the Universe has a large desert, lots of cliffs and mountains and canyons- and underground tunnels. And what we see of Zarkon’s planet does match up with DotU’s Planet Doom- gloomy atmosphere, dark-colored architecture that sticks upwards from a near-perpetual fog. 

But, of course… the Lions are able to literally sync together to become a larger entity. They’re intensely interrelated. Which would suggest all those meteors came from some kind of single source- they all start of the same kind.

Other things of interest: In the Blade of Marmora episode, Kolivan never refers to Red as a vehicle or machine. He calls her “your beast”.

All of the energy-dense minerals we’ve encountered- the Balmera crystals, and then scaultrite- is some kind of organic byproduct off a living creature. And both the Balmera and the Weblum tell us that there are absolutely living creatures as large as the Lions, if not even bigger. And like the Robeasts and Balmera, they can initially seem inorganic.

The Lions have a lot of physiology and behavior that just doesn’t make sense for a warship. As far as we’ve seen, they’re the only vessel that is shaped like an animal. But they roar, snarl, fight with claws and teeth, run along the ground… form a symbiotic relationship with, and intercommunicate closely, with much smaller creatures, accompanied by odd noises and glowing lights- just like how the Balmera talks to its populace.

The Balmera is described as an animal that was fossilized while it’s still alive.

@headspacedad suggested a while ago the idea that the Lions are robeasts, but now I’m wondering if the robeasts are actually a knockoff attempt at recreating what the Lions actually are. If what that meteorite basically was, was like a chunk of amber, and what they forged the Black Lion out of wasn’t the crystal or metal or whatever that was- but something alive, and fossilized inside of it.

…Basically the idea of if something cracked open a Lion’s chassis, what’s inside that is a certain amount of flesh and bone. 

12.14 coda

Dean may have missed out on the fight, but he still feels like drinking when he finally gets back home. Ketch’s expensive bottle of bribery is still sitting on the war room table and his glass is still in his favorite spot, right where he left it.

“Oh, hello, sweetness. Daddy’s here,” Dean coos at it. He hums as he picks up the bottle - still heavy even after a couple of drinks. “Shhh. It’s just you and me now.”

Sam scoffs. “Really, Dean? You’re that easy?”

Dean rolls his eyes over his shoulder. “So?”

Sam doesn’t really want to start anything, he’s feeling too good. He lets Dean smuggle his booze away to his room like always and revels in the still-fresh feeling of adrenaline-fueled ass-kicking. Changing the world. Power in the palms of his hands. He’ll try not to let it go to his head, but he deserves to celebrate the win at least.

Dean, meanwhile, falls like a heavy weight against the back of his bedroom door. 

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How to become a good student (again) 3: Yearn for friendship - not worship; not debasement

Hello, fellow ex-good student!

‘tis done! This beast just got longer and longer, so I decided to cut it down a bit for the sake of readability. But let me know if there’s something that was too vague - the nuance might have got lost in the editing process.

Alright, let’s get down to business (to defeat! The Huns!)! So, if you’re an ex-good student, I’m pretty sure that you know this static in your head, right? Whenever you really need to do something but you just can’t get up and do it, so you keep procrastinating even though you hate it and keep scrolling and scrolling or gaming and gaming and feel more and more guilty?

Well, it might not be the most immediate analogy, but for this post I want you to consider that what connects you and your subject of study is essentially a relationship and that this static is (among other things) an indicator of how screwed up your relationship is. Just like with real people, your relationships with subjects can either

  • prosper and bear fruit (me & Creative Writing)
  • become cold and distant (me & French)
  • or, worst of all, turn sour and actively harmful. (me & PE, back in school)

Now, nobody likes to hear that they’re relationship-ing wrong. And it is true that different approaches work for different people. But here are the counter-productive relationships that I’ve personally ended up in and I’m gonna show you how I got into and out of them, so you can try to do the same. Maybe it’ll help you lift that static from your head.

Side-Note: Always remember that, since your subjects are just that (subjects), and not real people, you are the only one who can actually mend these relationships and, conversely, you are the one who screwed them up in the first place (probably with good intentions, though).

So, we’ll take them in this order:

1) Overeager Debasement

2) Undereager Debasement

3) Worship


(Oh, and in case you wanna catch up:

Masterpost 

Part 1

Part 2)


1) Overeager Debasement

What is it?

The desire to do everything, perfectly, at the same time, right now. Not to limit yourself to just one field of study, but to master them all, to reign supreme above knowledge, to keep your mind wide open to new possibilities, similarities and contradictions.
You overvalue your own capacities and undervalue the needs and difficulties of your subject.
(also refer to the first post for this)

How did you get here?

(read picture from right to left)

So. Many. Possible. Reasons.

  • it’s a cage. The idea of doing just one thing for the rest of your life scares you and you feel imprisoned at the thought of it
  • you know that you could be outstanding if you applied yourself
  • you know that you could be even more outstanding if you became accomplished in multiple fields
  • you want to find connections between fields nobody’s ever considered before
  • you feel like you’ve wasted your last few years and need to catch up to others
  • you’re afraid that you’re not good enough
  • you’re afraid of being ignorant
  • you’re arrogant

No matter the reason (I’ve gone through them all), people caught in this state of mind shovel more and more onto their plate.
And then wonder why they can’t swallow it all.

What do you think you’re doing?

A labour of love, most likely. You think you love languages and sciences and athletics and programming and cooking and hanging out with friends and being alone and so you just want to do it all!
You don’t want to limit yourself! You don’t want to lose any time! But there’s just so much and you have so little energy and ugh, if only I wasn’t destined for greatness, then I could relax like other little people, but no, I need to keep pushing! In every! Direction! At the same! Time!

I know your delusion. I’ve been there. You imagine yourself to be that one perfect friend who gets up at 6am, watches the sun rise, does yoga, eats a healthy breakfast, goes for a quick run, comes back home, answers all correspondence, is artistic for a few hours, then scientific for a few hours, then social for a few hours and ends the day with tiny masterpieces in each area, goes out with friends or family to grab a healthy dinner and goes to sleep, happy and balanced :)

Well, you know what, my starry-eyed friend?

What are you actually doing?

You’re the mental equivalent of a social butterfly.
You’re being fucking disrespectful.

You’re always on the run and never able to really commit to anything, because you’ve already scheduled something else afterwards. You’re shallow, deluded, that one friend that always comes in running, screaming “Besties  ~ ♥” and everyone shifts uncomfortably in their seats and smiles a painful smile and humours you, because they know you mean well, but they also know that you know nothing about them. 
You’ve never been there for them ever, but always expect them to be there for you. Whenever they want to talk about themselves, you nod and then proceed to about yourself and your plans and “ohmygosh, this is so nice, we need to meet more often ~ ♥ “. But at least you mean well, so they’ve agreed to keep it simple and on the “The weather is nice today”-level with you. 

But here you are, wondering why you’re not making any progress.
Mysterious.

So what do I do?

Well, you need to go from this:

To this:

How? More on that below.


2) Undereager Debasement

What is it?

This stage is what happens when you notice that your lofty ideals from Overeager Debasement cannot be fulfilled. You turn bitter, hateful, cold. You think you’re a failure, you think you were too soft. Instead of wanting to be friends with everyone, you now want to rule over everyone, fuck what they want.

You’re burnt out. You’re done. You just want to get through these stupid classes and catch a goddamn break, goddamnit.

And you WILL get through. You’re too proud to do anything else. But you don’t really care about any of it.
You just want to make it.

How did you get here?

If you were a good student, you probably heard at some point or another that you were “different” and that your complex and mysterious ways were not understandable and definitely not achievable for your average classmate.

Most people who tell you this mean well. A few want to make fun of you, but most actually do mean it as a compliment. But they don’t know how dangerous it is to hear it again and again, because regardless of whether it’s true or not, you start to believe it.
You start to believe that somehow, you have a higher calling, a higher standard. And you start to long for that day when your high standards will be met - when you will go to that one mysterious class where everyone is just as eager as you are, where the “Oh, captain, my captain!”-teacher will spark a fire in your brain that will never go out and when your ominous “gifts” can finally be put to good use for the prosperous future of mankind.


And you work.

And work.

And the class never comes.

You feel the weight on your shoulders when teachers talk of “high expectations”, you feel it crush you a little bit every time your friends tease you about your genuine fear that you might not get an A, that you might lose it all, that your “gifts” could disappear and you’ll be stranded and useless and you put in the hours, you work your ass off to keep that high standard, all in the hope of having that one miraculous class that never comes.

I realized that that class would never come when I entered university.

University, I’d told myself, would be my Arcadia, my Eden, my academic paradise where all my hard work would be rewarded!
Instead, I only found more drudgery, more incompetent professors, more disinterested students and even more bureacracy. To say that I was “disappointed” would be putting it very lightly.

I became disoriented and disenchanted. I realized that I could get through most classes with half-assed effort, I was hardly ever challenged, I floated along and hated every second of it. I blamed my boring teachers, the imperfect system, the teachers who had given me hope only for me to watch it crash and go up in flames.

What do you think you’re doing?

Being badass, cool and detached, most likely.

You dream of yourself as a master and your subjects as slaves. They bow to your will, they dance to your tune, you command them with the snap of a finger.

“Look, you slave of the system”, you say, lying on a velvet sofa, “Look, at how it hardly takes any effort for me to pass these classes! Look at how I spend my time doing things I actually like and that are actually worth it, unlike these stupidly easy classes taught by stupidly incompetent professors in a stupidly screwed-up system! Look at me, being edgy and drowning in self-hatred because I can physically feel myself gliding off the rails that made me so “special” and becoming one of the average people in the masses, haha. Ha. Ha. Screw academia, but still give me good grades, amirite?”

I know your delusion. I’ve been there. You imagine yourself to be that one perfect friend that never studies for classes, comes for three lectures per semester and still manages to get perfect grades because everything you do in school is, like, so five years ago. That one friend who has read all the classics in their spare time, has conquered and enslaved all the knowledge actually worth knowing, will quote obscure Polish philosophers you’ve never heard of and plays the piano with a perfect pitch. They’re the wisest, most culture-non-conforming people you know - they’ve been up until 5am, wandering the streets and drinking vodka from a bottle while forcefully pentrating the mysteries of the universe all by themselves until they finally fall asleep on a park bench and awake with an epiphany about Klein bottles.
They’re “special”.

What are you actually doing?

Caring more about appearing “special” than actually trying to be “special”, that’s what you’re doing.

But, look, what made you so “special” and “different” in the first place was not a “calling” or “gifts” or the fact that you wrote good grades and were destined for greatness.

Here’s a handy chart I’ll use later - you were lucky enough to fall into the green zone, lucky enough to be born with an innate respect and a love for learning. That’s what made you “special”. That’s what made you succeed. Not pressure, not warped ideals and certainly not the fear of failure.


But somewhere along the way you forgot that and only focussed on the results. You started to believe yourself to be so special that everybody else should cater to you.
The fancy titles, the awe-struck looks, the “You’re so amazing”s and the “The genius of a decade”, the planned Nobel prize speech and the prestige, the dream others had lovingly created for you and you had slowly absorbed and warped as your own? It got to you. Hell, it got to me.
And it became more important than learning itself.
Somewhere along the way, you and I, we became an arrogant and lazy assholes.

You looked down on your easy courses and homework and instead of recognising how lucky you are, doing it in a minute and a half and then putting in the extra work on top to dig deeper and to maybe contribute something of value and fun, you threw it aside with a snide remark as beneath you.
Of course it wasn’t fun. Of course it wasn’t challenging. You never even tried to make it either.

(And don’t get me wrong: I honestly do think that the education system as it is right now needs MAJOR reforms. But right now? It is what it is. And instead of making the best of it and doing what you once loved so much, you succumbed to societal pressures you found yourself unable to fulfill and said “meh”.
You cared so much about the fame and the title that the relationship itself didn’t matter.)

But this isn’t the master-slave relationship you imagine it to be.
It’s a trophy-friendship. Once upon a time, you got on really well with this person and other people loved your friendship. You fell in love with the ideal, with their connections, their money, their prestige, their name on a CV, and you stuck around just for that.
You valiantly ignore the reality of the state of things between you two
and take them out only when absolutely needed, only when things are this close to falling apart and so you keep walking a fine, fine line.
Whenever a deadline approaches, you shower them with attention and love and, gingerly, they open up to you and you see a depth and complexity to them that astounds you and makes you think “Imagine! Imagine how much more I could have seen if only I’d started earlier?”
But the moment the crisis has passed, you toss them aside once again.

Because this is enough to make your name.
You may not remember much about these nights or about the person at all, but the only thing that counts is that it will fulfill your “special” prophecy and make you a legend, right?

Well, always remember this:
(read picture from right to left)

You’re not “special” if you made it to university. You’re not “special” if you’ve made your name. 
It comes down to a simple choice: do you value appearances over integrity or the other way round? Do you dare to look like a fumbling idiot again when you start something new? Is the “appearing like an idiot”-part more important to you than the “learning/creating something new”-part? 
Have a think about it.

3) Worship

“Alright”, you’ll say, “Alright. I get it. So I’ll treat my “friends”/subjects with respect and integrity and I’ll take all the time and concentration I can bestow upon them, just as I would upon real friends. But do you want me to be like, uh - like…

What is it?

“…like one of those anime characters that lives only for their dream and gets up at like 6am, does the thing, talks about the thing, breathes the thing, goes to bed, dreams of the thing and then wakes up at 6am to do the thing?”

(Google: Did you mean Hinata Shouyou?

Yes, yes, I did, google.)

Well, no, I don’t want you to do that. See, that’s the other extreme and unless you’re an anime character, chances are that it won’t work out for you. 

How did you get here?

Personally, I was caught in this trap for a loooooong time. Anime offered me a new way of relating to my passions that neither my family nor my school had ever shown me: unabashed obsession.
I wanted to be perfect. I wanted to be obsessed. I wanted to give myself up to a higher ideal, something above human consciousness, something that would endure. I wanted to, well, get up at 6am, do the thing, talk about the thing, breathe the thing and so on - “the thing” in question being, of course, studying. I made elaborate plans, complicated lists, study-plans that shift on a daily basis and cover all grounds, I wanted to study for two hours before school, wanted to repeat lessons, wanted to give myself up to knowledge, made cool covers for my notebooks, made mock exams for my friends to use, planned to focus on each continent for a month and study it, planned to listen to one new composer each day, planned to go to the museum every week, planned to analyze Sherlock Holmes and think just like him, planned to - you get the idea.

I wanted to be like this:

What do you think you’re doing?

Being but a humble servant to the eternal workings of truth. Knowing thou art unworthy, yet suffering the perfection of study.

I wanted to go from 0 to 100, I wanted knowledge and wisdom to transform and deliver me, I wanted to feel enlightened, I wanted to feel my brain burning, pushing frontiers and breaking through to new horizons, I wanted to elevate myself to touch even the lowest levels of truth.
I wanted to do something noble, something worthwhile, something that could never be critisized and would always be valued, something with eternal meaning that would echo through the ages and I wanted to be even the tiniest cog in the machinery of mind.

What are you actually doing?

Being, quite simply, an idiot.

This is one of my favourite quotes (David Wong):

“There are two ways to dehumanize someone: by dismissing them, and by idolizing them.” 

The same goes for studying. As shown above, studying won’t work out if you do not treat your subjects with respect. Conversely, studying also won’t work if you continue to idolize it as work beyond all work and reproach, as the only true calling, as the realm of the genii and by self-flagellating yourself and repeating “I’m but a humble servant in your kingdom of reason and will never reach where you are, but will spend all my time trying to reach you.” 

Why? Because by saying “I’ll never reach you or be worthy of you”, you’ve already sealed your fate. Some students (no matter how well they actually perform) are stuck thinking that they are stupid and incapable of doing well. Others think that the trick is in the preparation and they undergo complicated rituals of finding exactly the right study spot, exactly the right study drink, exactly the right study time, etc. in the hope of channeling the connection between their godly subject and themselves, but it never turns out quite as glamorous as they’d hoped (once again, speaking from experience).

This is because you cannot force a true friendship if you think yourself unworthy of it. It will always be worship. 

And why are you worshipping?
Because it takes the pressure right off of you
. This always annoyed me about some of my fellow students. They treated becoming a good student as this miraculous and unlikely event that only happens to the #blessed.
I insisted that “no”, it could be done. “Yes”, it was hard work, but ultimately absolutely doable. But now that I’ve been in their shoes? I understand.
Admitting that you could have done it anytime implies failure on your part for not having done it. By saying “Oh no, it is so very complex and divine and a lowly worm like me could never hope to crawl in its shadows”, you shift the focus away from yourself and onto the thing itself. 

But this is a synthetic, manufactured relationship with a partner that does not even exist. It is, at its heart, a kyaa  ~ I hope senpai notices me! (๑♡⌓♡๑) - kind of relationship. It’s idolizing not a person’s true character, but their appearance, their aesthetic and the values that they represent for you. It’s not really listening to what they’re saying, but warping their words so they fit into your perfect idea of them.
Just, unlike with undereage debasement, you do not play pretend that everything’s fine and secretly hate the other person deep down - you honestly idolize them to heaven and back, so you could never possible reach them.
You’re using them to fill in the holes in your own personality.

And that … just isn’t fun? I dunno about you, but treating studying as something that must be done perfectly with exactly the right pen and the perfect face-mask after the right smoothie and in the right lighting by a window overgrown with ivy and with perfect concentration from the first moment and unwavering, knightly passion and exact planning from 6am to bedtime all because I know deep down that I will not be able to fulfill these ideals and thus don’t have to feel bad about not reaching them just … isn’t for me. I don’t like my relationships to be all overstructured and “perfect” and high maintenance like that.

I want my friendships and my studying to be authentic. And that means that sometimes it’s messy and sometimes it’s hard and sometimes it’s quoting Keats while lying on the floor at 2am in the morning and chugging milk out of a carton, but it’s real.
I truly do understand this longing to make studying look pretty and like a magical realm, because when you’re in the flow that’s really what it feels like. But the beauty comes along with the practice, not the other way round.

No, but honestly - what do I DO then?


Y’remember Hippogriffs from Harry Potter? That’s how I imagine my subjects. Approach them carefully, honestly, maintaining eye contact and as equals and they will respect you. This scene:

This scene is what I’m talking about. 
If you were in a worship-state, you would only admire them from afar, gushing over how beautiful they are, but sad that they would never deign to even look in your general direction. (think of all the subjects you thought would be way too difficult for you)
If you were in a debasement-state, you’d either try to make friends with all the hippogriffs, hopping from one to the other and forming no bond with either or you’d “tsk” disdainfully and try to force them to obey you against their will. (*cough* Malfoy *cough*)

If, however, you’re in the green, there will be mutual respect between you and you will be able to fly.

So what does it mean to be in the green? 
It means not to do any of the above, obviously, so 

  • take your time for and invest brainpower into each and every one of your subjects - be a good friend. Be there. Listen. Even if they have crazy ideas at 4am in the morning. 
  • appreciate your subjects and know that they are more than the teacher who tries to get you to know them. Sometimes, some people just have a really shitty PR department (especially maths)
  • don’t think too much or too little of yourself. You can do amazing things, but that does not give you the license not to do amazing things anymore, rest on your laurels and expect others to applaud you for it. 

  • some relationships take longer than others to build, but getting to understand someone who puzzled you from the first moment and challenged your beliefs will improve your own personality as well
    (side-eye at PE. Yes, I love you now, you crazy athletic bastard)
  • do it for the sake of the relationship itself, because you enjoy their company. Results are presents which, although very much appreciated, should not be the main motivator to keep you going.
    This essentially means that you should think of studying as hanging out with a friend - already makes it seem so much more inviting and way less daunting, does it not?

    (Logic and I, being saltmates. Real friends judge other people together)
  • be aware that all friendships go through rocky patches and some subjects might take a while to warm up to you or you to them. But if you think that it’s worth it, then you gotta power through that. If you don’t think it’s worth it, you gotta be brave enough to say good-bye. 


Look, what I’m actually saying is … be Souma Yukihira from Food Wars.

Food Wars is a crazy and at times pretty pervy manga/anime, but I’ll be damned if it isn’t also one of the best pieces of fiction I’ve ever consumed and if Souma isn’t one of the most admirable main characters I’ve ever encountered.  

The relationship between him and cooking is filled with trust, love and equality. He trusts his cooking skills, because he knows that they have spent a long time together - cooking won’t let him down and he won’t ever let cooking down by stopping to look for ways to improve.

That doesn’t mean, however, that he’s always deadly serious - he loves to play around with cooking and to try ridiculous new things. He never forgets the joy that even the simplest form of cooking brings him. 

There’s one great episode where he puts his life as a chef on the line and someone fearfully asks him what he’d do if he lost. He shrugs and says he could become a lawyer or a teacher or something. So while he loves cooking profoundly, he does not worship it and he knows that there are other relationships he could build up if he had to. He just …doesn’t want to, because cooking is his bff. 

He loves to take on challenges to see how far he and cooking have come -

- and he takes challenges very seriously -


- but takes it even more seriously if he loses -

- and nonetheless knows that they are stronger for the challenges they have faced together. 

So, yes, this is what it means to be in the green. Cherish your friendships, hang out together, be honest, funny, clever, curious and you. 

You’ll be surprised at how much fun the two of you will have, now that all the pretensions and pressures are gone. 

Just …hang out and have fun.

(and maybe watch Food Wars!, because damn, Souma is the MVP of my inspirational heroes)

Have a great day and I’ll see you in the next (and hopefully shorter) part 4 :)

Normani VS Camila Girls, Lauren and Ty Dolla Sign Drama

You know, maybe in Europe it’s still dawn, while in the US it’s night. But here in Asia, it’s already in the morning, on the next day. I actually went to sleep at 2.30 AM, which means I was still awake until 8 hours ago. This was happening right when I was about to sleep, but since I never see my timeline anymore, I didn’t really know what’s going on until I woke up. No, I didn’t stalk Twitter right after I woke up. I just happened to join in a lot of group chats and these are what I found. You know, it was not a pleasant thing to wake up with these trolls, and it just took me 1 second to get my mood ruined.

Seriously, I’m so enraged. As Harmonizers, you must know that we tend to associate Ally girls with being sweet and unproblematic. But, what makes me disappointed even more is that one of these fans is Ally’s stan. I won’t mention which one but you can check it out by yourself. So, Ally girls are sweet? Bullshit! Every -izers are the same. They just care about their favorite ones without caring about others. Note: I’m speaking this as a general. It doesn’t mean all of you are like that if you are one of them. And I do know that there are people who still respect the other girls even if they only stan 1 or 2 girls.

What makes me frustrated even more is that I followed one of these people. So I checked one by one and I unfollow that account. So, my decision has been right not to see my timeline anymore. It’s full of hates.

Honestly though, we know who are the object of hates here and who got the most hates. I’m gonna say it out loud, it’s Camila. Now that she’s even out of the group, it’s even easier to just throw shades and hates on her. But, here I’m not gonna defend anyone in particular cause the last time I did it, I’ve got a lot of question whether I would do the same for the others. I was even questioned, “Where are you guys when Ally got bodyshamed? When Lauren got bodyshamed? Or when Dinah was accused of being homophobic?” You don’t know me here. What I do is nothing but supporting and defending all the girls. Even right now, I should be working, but I put my time aside to write this.

That #ApologizeCamila hashtag is so disgusting tbh. I thought as a fan, we should have understood by now not to pit women against each other. The girls have been saying it over and over again. As #Harmonizers we should have known this better than anyone else in this world. If you really love the girls, you will know all about their interviews, what they have been promoting, and their advices as feminists. Should i remind you about what they said about what they have been promoting, watch this!

If you idolize these girls, then you should follow them by example. I still don’t understand how people admire someone as a person, inside and outside, physically and characteristically, but not follow them by example. Then what are you stanning? Only their sexy bodies? Their beautiful voices? Their boobs? Their asses? You wanna get inside their pants and you get horny watching them dancing around? I’m sorry, but that means you are drooling over them, NOT idolizing them. I know some of the fans are like that, but these girls are more than just their sexy bodies and their voices.

Please keep in mind that these girls are HUMAN. THEY HAVE FEELINGS. Confronting them out of something they didn’t do is stupid! Who started the war? US!!! Now, let’s trace back. Things have gotten really worse when Normani’s face was cropped and lynched. Who started it? Answer by yourself! We might not see it or we might see it sometimes, but Camila has been crying over all the hates she gets. Now who started it? Now, let’s not blame each other over WHO did it first. You keep saying, “Camilizers started it.” or “Normani girls started it.” WHATEVER!! Basically we are the ones who makes everything worse. We are the ones who started the war. And not to mention, we ARE the reason why the girls are hurt. Are you heartless or what speaking about them or even confronting them out of something that they don’t even do? Before you speak all those disgusting words, THINK, PUT YOURSELF UNDER THEIR SHOES, AND THINK ABOUT HOW THEY FEEL. Are you happy being called a cunt? A whore? Or every other negative words flowing out of your mouth so easily. We are all the same in front of God, cause we are ALL THE SAME: HUMANS. So, if you call them those words, then it goes the same with you (I have said this on my posts waaaaayy long ago). You call Normani a monkey, then you are also a monkey. You call Camila a camel, then you are also a camel. Now are you happy being called like that? ……………EXACTLY!!!

I’m not telling you who to stan or whether you should be an OT5 stan. Some of the people in the fandom indeed only stan 1 or 2 girls. Some of us are OT4 stans. Some of us are Camren shippers, but don’t really know about Fifth Harmony. Whoever you stan, please have respect to the other girls. Do a research about them as a person, what they have been promoting, and keep in mind that the world is much better if we just spread love instead of hates. You have a big platform: Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr, YouTube. Some of you might have only 100 followers, some other might have more than 1000 followers, some others have more than 10K followers. Use those platform for something good, NOT for something bad. Now I’m asking you this question: IF YOU USE YOUR PLATFORM FOR SOMETHING BAD, YOU HURT PEOPLE, YOU THROW SHADES AND HATES HERE AND THERE, AND YOU SPREAD NEGATIVITIES, ARE YOU EVEN PROUD OF IT? Ask yourself this question whenever you wanna start spreading negative words and throw hates. I’m speaking this to the general fandom, NOT only to Harmonizers. I’m not a fan of her but her wisdom is also something I admire. Lucy worded it well here.

Now if you have nothing to do, or if you have a lot of free time, use your platform to support the girls instead. Vote for awards. Compliment them for what they do. Show them love. Keep reminding them that we support them no matter what. Be there for them. Cause there have been a lot of drama in these girls’ lives since 2014. Imagine yourself in their position and your lives are out there being spoken, talked, and posted anywhere. Some are true, and some are even made up stories. They have got enough drama, and don’t even add up more dramas to their lives. This is the example of the current drama.

So, that girl is Ty’s ex. Perez Hilton even makes it worse by making it like a love triangle. *rolls eyes*

Honestly though, this is more like a “love rectangle” (I’m making up a term here lol) cause Camren shippers are also going crazy out there. But I don’t believe this guy. Ever since the Fifth Harmony drama especially about the leaked picture of Lauren and Lucy, I don’t believe in media anymore. For God’s sake, he might even get paid for this.

Honestly there have been a lot of drama involving Lauren and Ty Dolla Sign before this one, but let’s focus on what happened in the past 24 hours. Otherwise, we are gonna write a novel about the girls. But, let’s see their indirect tweets about their reaction.

Ty Dolla Sign has been teasing by tweeting and deleting. And his ex also did the same. Have you ever wondered why this happened after the Camren denial? I keep wondering why drama has been put to our faces over and over again.

Now enough with the drama about Camila leaving the band or the questions like “Is Camila leaving the band?” cause she did. Ever since the leaked photos in October 2016, who are the center of all of these dramas? Other than the side projects or solo projects that have been going on, now trace back and focus on what the media has put on headlines that blow up all over the world. Everything revolves around LAUREN. Lauren’s leaked photo with Lucy, Lauren got caught in weed in the airport, Lauren tweeting about something during the Grammy that made the media put on headlines “Did Lauren Jauregui diss Camila Cabello?”, Lauren’s photoshoot with Lucy, Lauren’s denial about Camren, and now Lauren and Ty Dolla Sign dating rumors. I’m sorry, did I miss something here? Cause, it’s hard to put up with all the drama. But, have you ever wondered why it has to be Lauren being put on the spotlight of medias and headlines? The scandal is always about Lauren so far.

I’m gonna leave it there though. I leave rooms for interpretations and I leave you to believe what you wanna believe. But, I want you to keep your mind open. Have you ever wondered why they keep teasing by deleting tweets? Was it a mistake? Or are they playing with us? Are they playing with our minds? Are they playing with our hearts? If they know, it would blow up and get themselves being in the spotlight, if they don’t like it, why would they do it? They know people will focus on the deleted tweets.

I just wanna remind you this thing. Lauren is a VERY PRIVATE person. She doesn’t like her private lives to be talked in public and being posted all over the place. She keeps ranting about people talking about her private lives. Then, why all of a sudden, all of these are put on our faces like it was some kind of shiny treasure we have just found out of the clue we have been given and we are all mesmerized by it?

Anyway, I don’t wanna get delusional but Lauren tweeted that during the #ApologizeCamila was trending. Honestly, those tweet could be anything. It could show that she low-keyly supported Camila or she could be tweeting about things in general or she could be talking about her own personal lives and the headlines about Ty and her. But since we are so caught up with the whole Ty and Lauren dating rumors, we only perceive those tweets as her reactions towards it. Meanwhile, there might be other things she is implying to that we will never know what it is about unless she answers some of the fans’ replies.

Ever since the drama in 2016, especially that goddamn cursed Dec 18th, 2016, I never really believe in media, headlines, tweets, posts, NOT even the girls’ accounts. I only like Snapchat or Instagram stories since it seems like those are the only ways we can see something behind the scene. But, even now Snapchat can be staged, like the 7/27 Tour Spain when Camila was actually in the bus, but her face was not there. We could hear her teaching the girls Spanish, but then we still found only 4 girls in the camera. Sometimes, these girls just CAN’T pretend. Lauren also admitted herself that she has another Snapchat account, which means that she has a private Snapchat account and I’m sure the other girls do too.

What I’m implying here is no matter how much we wanna know about what happens behind-the-scene, WE KNOW NOTHING. No matter how much we think we know what’s going on in their lives, we know nothing. We can only watch their body languages and their expressions now as those are the most sincere language they can communicate to us, NOT some bullshit written interview or headlines on the media.

Keep your mind open and respect the girls, guys! And keep supporting these girls endlessly. They need us, especially Lauren. I can’t imagine being in her position where dramas keep haunting her life one after another.

Hate To See You Go (Grayson)

Summary: Based off of this ask. You’re a teacher at Grayson’s daughter’s kindergarten and it’s Mother’s Day.
Word Count: 4,463
Warnings: Actual daddy!Gray. Daddy kink (if you squint).
A/N: I swear, I received this ask 3 weeks ago and it’s still stuck on my mind. So I hope you like this, leave feedback if you want to!! This turned out to be longer than intended, yikes xx


The first time you saw Grayson Dolan was when his daughter, Penelope fell off a swing during recess and scraped her knee. She’d cried as you stroked her hair, pointing at her bloody knee while telling you of how she’d tried to stand up on the swing, her foot slipping in process which had caused her to fall off. It wasn’t that bad. In fact, it was a small scrape but it still made your heart squeeze in your chest when you looked over her tear-stained face, her hand squeezed into a small fist as she rubbed her eye.

You’d taken her to your own classroom, calling her father in the process. His voice had sounded deep and it kind of shocked you for a moment. It had been two months since the term had started and Penelope had been brought to kindergarten by her Aunt Cameron. You’d been so curious as to why her father was never around, but Penelope had explained how her father was working early hours and he never had time to take her to preschool; which, you never frowned over that because there were plenty of parents who worked their butts off, having a relative or even a nanny drop their children off in your classroom.

Keep reading

Honestly the CW is in many ways the embodiment of my issues with current attempts at “diversity” in the mainstream media when it comes to queer rep. I’m not going to sit here and say that television is still the same cis heterosexual landscape it was a few decades ago, there have been improvements, but movie studios and television networks alike are still really quick to pat themselves on the back for bare minimum efforts to provide meaningful representation while making sure they haven’t alienated their “core” audiences too much. The CW is imo one of the worst offenders of this - doing just enough to get noticed, but rarely anything of any real substance, and much less anything that would actually risk altering their key demographics.

On this network, “groundbreaking” queer pairings exist as side ships (i.e. Sanvers) or are axed when they become a threat to their real goals (i.e. Clexa). If you don’t think this is because the network doesn’t want to offend the type of viewer that would be scandalized by having to watch more than 5 minutes of non heterosexual interactions per episode, you’re much too naive. The CW doesn’t defy anything. The CW does JUST enough to get praise and then will course correct to the normal, and that’s partly because for some shows they prioritize catering to straight teenage girls that will throw a fit over not having m/f or m/m ships to salivate over, which is basically what’s happening with Sanvers and Karolsen in Supergirl. Healthy interracial relationship where the guy is actually pretty great? Nah, that needs to be axed so that your standard CW bad boy asshole can romance the female lead instead. WLW relationship with a coming out storyline? Good for diversity points, not worth doing much with really, priority must be on the patented CW bad boy asshole that they’re convinced teenage straight girls will swoon over. Supercorp? I love their chemistry, but not only do we know it’s never going to happen, it’s shameless queer baiting that they’re getting away with because they can use Sanvers as a shield to say that they’re not afraid of canon wlw romances (god forbid one of their shows has more than ONE wlw romance at a time though right?).

They don’t just care about straight teenage girls btw. The CW is making an active effort to reel in an older audience, and a more male audience too. This started with their first DC shows and is particularly the case for shows like, ahem, Kidz Bop Game of Thrones/Westworld/Terminator/Black Mirror (i.e. The 1OO). If the CW has to choose between providing meaningful representation to young queer audiences and retaining the older/male demographics they desperately want to court, BELIEVE ME, they will toss aside your rep no questions asked.

Hell, I’m pretty sure that’s what happened with Kidz Bop Grim Dark Shitty Sci Fi. I strongly suspect that Lexa getting killed off was in part because older male audiences wouldn’t have tolerated the continued presence of a non sexualized lesbian character that wasn’t there to tantalize them and/or be a moustache twirling villain. Even if Alycia hadn’t been cast as a main in F/TWD (which we always knew was a bullshit excuse to begin with), Lexa probably would have been killed off because her existence and role in the show were threatening not just the network’s vision of what they wanted their Kidz Bop For Adults HBO Rip Off to be, but who they wanted the main audience to be as well. This of course doesn’t even begin to touch the other characters/storylines that have been ruined probably for the sake of appeasing this audience, often with racist/sexist/xenophobic effects. They succeeded, BTW, the demo numbers for the show are higher in older demographics and their best ratings for episodes consistently come from male viewers. So brava CW, you finally have a product that can be 100% embraced by older male viewers that get off to gratuitous violence and shock value, with the added bonus that you managed to fool some other audiences into believing you were actually doing something daring or socially progressive.

The CW wants to have its cake and eat it too. They want to bask in the attention that comes from having any queer romance whatsoever while not doing anything truly groundbreaking with it. Because groundbreaking would upset their bread and butter as well as the new demographics they’re actually targeting. Groundbreaking would mean upsetting the status quo of the only audiences they truly care about.

Fairy Tail Chapter 537 Review

Wow this chapter…

Okay the cover is edolas which is honestly an arc I enjoy, but here’s my only problem, where the hell is Mystogan? I know that’s the joke but come on!

We open on the defeated Zeref. Mavis talks about what the guild is founded on and Zeref admits defeat.

Mavis brings up that she is going to do to Zeref what he did to her using her contradiction curse, put him into an eternal sleep. Which is honestly an incredibly easy answer to a problem that people have been speculating for years on how it be solved.

And now we get what I think is the best part of the chapter. The idea and struggle of contradiction that affects how Mavis feels about Zeref.

Now as much as I like this there is a one major problem with this and I’ll get into it soon.

I’ll just let these scenes speak for themselves. Honestly this is really effective. I mean writing the contradiction is very interesting given the already confused emotions you probably are going through, given fighting a war against this person who you do care about.

And this causes the beginning of their death. Also Zeref is now going to kill Natsu because he’s going to die too. Yeah I’m sure that’ll be solved next chapter.

So by both giving each other love at the same time they kill each other. I’m guessing they kissed again

Okay the one magic being love was already introduced and honestly, I don’t have a problem with that. Like if all magic originated from the one magic and that magic itself is something effected by emotions and Mard geer stated END discovered curse by basing it off negative emotions, it actually makes sense that love could be the origin of it. Love makes you do stupid things, love can make you act like an idiot, love can also compel you to do wrong like become obsessed, but love can also be used to better yourself, love can be used to make you motivated. So the idea that magic and curse all spawning from the power of “love” kinda make sense. It’s still hammy, I mean, the power of love is goofy, but it actually make sense in the context of the series.

But now time for the crap. We cut to the FT guild members and…

Yup. Makarov’s back! Bullshit. Complete bullshit. Can this war have at least some SOME consequence for Fairy Tail! Like I had problems with how forced Makarov’s death was and I’ve believed he should’ve died a while ago but even so, you STILL can’t have him actually die? The hell!

And It looks like Zeref and Mavis can live happily ever after… Okay.now before I get into my post chapter follow up, I need to address the biggest problem with this chapter and that’s everything that came before this. I believe that this chapter could’ve been amazing if it weren’t for the fact Hiro had given us no reason to route for Zervis. Yes, he made them canon but the arc has never focused on said relationship in a way that makes it seem like they should get together at the end of this. In fact, just before this we had Zeref screwing over Mavis and her feelings for his own and stealing fairy heart, and while you could make the argument he’s doing this while having her future in mind he’s still disregarding her feelings about wanting to be with him. Moments that you could claim as subtle love like him not wanting to watch Irene take Fairy Heart doesn’t work because he’s still making her suffer. This would’ve been effective more with pre Alvarez Zeref but as it stands, you’ve not presented us with a reason to route for this relationship.

This feels like the opposite of the usual Hiro Mashima problems this arc, the build up for this was poorly handled but this pay off is amazing, whereas it’s been more common Hiro gives really good build up but poor pay off. Well we’ll see where this goes next chapter.

Post chapter follow up: Wow. This could’ve been, in my opinion, a terrific chapter. Like lets hit the positives first, this focuses mainly on Zeref and Mavis and by god it’s good to have a meaningful conversation. This talk about contradiction vs actual love is very engaging, and really feels like a good conclusion for the character of Zeref.

Another thing that I like, is this isn’t full redemption. Like, he still gets a happy ending but he’s not really “turned” but then again Zeref has walked that gray area for a long time (till Alvarez) so this feels more natural then say Minerva and her magical heel turn.

Also points for freaking remembering that this curse can do this Hiro. Though I still don’t understand why Mavis got insppired from the fight with Jacob to do this, oh wait let me guess, is it Natsu and Lucy are in love? Yeah, even if that was the case, that still doesn’t equate to how she came out with this answer.

Now the negatives, the build up is very bad. It doesn’t make me want them to get together so it weighs down what could honestly be a very good.

Another con is that Makarov is back, cheating death for a 5th time now. God damnit, look Rave revived characters who died that last arc, but they were main characters who’ve been constantly doing stuff. While Makarov has been here since the beginning, he hasn’t done much in years along with the fact that now there is no consequence for fairy tail. This war meant nothing. And even though Makarov’s death was rushed and flawed, there’s still no reason to bring him back other than “everyone has to have a happy ending”.

Final Verdict: 6/10

  • This on it’s own was very good
  • It in context however is weighed down
  • Another consequence undone
  • Really effective payoff.

anonymous asked:

Will Keith take Lance back to the rest of the team (ARE THEY STILL ALIVE?) or will Lance put up a fight? (Also jfc this is so amazing I absolutely love it)

OKAY SO the team is actually on the same planet as Keith and Lance are in that comic but they sent Keith to scout ahead while they greeted the king and then got caught up in a little congratulation ceremony (which is arranged as a suprise for the shallura wedding that happened not long ago lmao)

everyone is fine (older and wiser and scarred up but like everyone made it. Matt is even with them and chillin’) and it’s actually aFTER they’ve gone back to earth for a bit and established a connection so getting back to earth is way easier and faster)

Lance will STUBBORNLY deny any ties he has to voltron because that concept to him is absolutely RIDICULOUS 

(ever since he can remember) he’s been hearing stories about how voltron saved the universe it’s wild and he’s deF not one of those heroes c’mon now. ;)

But he will go back with Keith after some convincing. (he doesn’t believe him but I mean who’s gonna pass up a chance to meet the defenders of the universe???? nOT Lance.

How to Get the Most Out of Your Tarot Reading

Tarot readings are cool, but why not make them AWESOME? Here’s some ways you can be sure to get the most out of your divination situation.

🔮Have a Question In Mind- This sounds pretty obvious, but it’s astounding how many people I read for that have no idea what they want out of it. Wanting a general reading is fine, but definitely have an answer to the question “what would you like to know?” when you sit down/place an order. Thinking about what you want helps you solidify the question with the cards, and helps you avoid thinking an hour later, “Drat! I should have asked about _____.”

🔮Think about How You Frame your Question- Tarot has different strengths and weaknesses, like any divination form. Playing to these strengths will help your reader give you a more fulfilling answer! For example, I once had a querent purchase multiple readings from me asking for very specific times of things. While tarot CAN be used in that way, it is much harder and in my experience usually comes at the expense of more valuable information. A better version of, “when will X happen?” is “what will make X happen?” or “What must I do before X?” That way you know if X requires specific action on your part, instead of sitting around waiting for “Oh, maybe about three months” and nothing happening. Phrasing your question in a way that milks the most information out of the cards makes for a better reading!

🔮Know Your Reader- First and foremost, a tarot reader is not the same as a psychic. A lot of psychics use tarot cards as a tool, but most people just offering readings can’t tell you the name of your future spouse or the color of your great-grandfather’s shirt when he died. Secondly, every reader is different! Some are intuitive readers and pull cards from the middle of the deck, some have you choose the cards, others deal from the top, and that’s just one example. Every reader has a different style to their interpretation that makes for a unique experience, so if possible, be picky with who you choose to purchase from. Some readers work better with certain types of questions. Maybe some give more detail in their interpretations. Some readers tell a little story about each card, which people can like or dislike. Some have trouble delivering bad news. Some just may not resonate with you! If you have the ability to check out multiple readers, especially online, definitely do so and find one who you think lines up with your needs the best.

🔮Don’t Be Afraid to Confide- The phrase, “I have a question in mind, but I’m not going to tell you” makes me want to rip my hair out. In my experience, people do this less because they want answers and more because they want to be impressed by a display of Tarot’s accuracy and the reader’s intuitiveness. They want to see the reader still pick up on the Truth with no outside input. This is all fine and dandy, but it’s not going to give you a lot of information. Why? It’s going to be vague! I can’t connect the dots as well if I don’t have half of them. It’s okay to give me some information about your question; it helps me pick out signs I may have not found significant without context. That said, I understand the fear of just having a reader use your words to tell you what you already know and call it divination. So don’t feel like you need to over share, either! If you want to know about whether to break up with your partner over that argument two days ago or not, a simple, “I’ve been having relationship problems and would like some insight on how to move forward.” Should work fine. That should allow you to still get a display of the reader’s intuitive ability (identifying the specifics of your situation) while still getting an actual answer.

🔮Interpret For Yourself- Yeah yeah, do my job for me. But not quite. Sometimes there are symbols that strike us that the reader may not emphasize in their interpretation. You know yourself better than they do, after all. If you think the cards are saying something extra to you, feel free to include that in your personal takeaway! If a reader asks, “what does this mean to you?/does anything stand out to you?” (this happens more in person than online) it’s totally okay to say, “I find X really interesting because Y. How do you think that ties in with the rest of the reading?” Feel free to start a conversation over it. Pick these cards apart with your reader. I, at least, love when querents do this. It shows they’re invested and engaged, and it lets me pull even more information out for them.

🔮Take a Picture- If you can. Sometimes online readings come with a photo of your spread! (Mine do.) Look back on the photo with a fresh mind later and reflect on it. Have you come up with any new personal interpretations for it? (Once I had a reading that I thought was about starting a business, but realized later it was about me writing a book!) What do each the cards actually mean? Are there any patterns in the spread you notice? It can also be fun to look back on it much later and see how accurate it was!

🔮Get Readings from Multiple People- I like a little variety, but I also just like people. I have people I go to for when I need a really solid dependable reading, but I also enjoy talking to other readers and seeing how they do it differently. I know it’s helped me improve a lot as a reader. If you’re able, consider getting your question answered through multiple sources (but be respectful, we’re still people.) See if there are any common threads between the two interpretations (it happens quite frequently.) See how they differ! It’s more work and money but is usually fairly interesting.

🔮Don’t Take it Too Seriously- At the end of the day, getting a reading is not going to change your life. Only you do that. While tarot can be a magnificent tool for insight, it is not an actual changing force in and of itself. Don’t stress too hard over it and be sure to use it alongside your own judgement, intuitiveness, heart, and common sense. And most importantly, enjoy it for the sake of enjoying an art form!

If you’d like to purchase a reading from me, you can do so here!

Originally posted by limoniume

Try to Intimidate my disabled neighbor? I'll make sure you get dropped by your sponsors.

So this ended about four months ago, and still makes me happy whenever I think about it. This might be long sorry.

I’ve lived in this apartment complex about a year or so and it’s pretty nice I suppose. My next door neighbor is an older lady who happens to be disabled. While I don’t know the actual extent of her disabilities, I know she needs help from time to time and If I’m around I try to help. She’s really sweet and about once a week she’ll make me a plate of something homemade to eat since I work nights and really don’t cook. Her pork chops and fried cabbage are 🔥.

We both live upstairs and she uses a wheelchair but she can walk up and down the stairs slowly, and if I’m around I’ll carry her wheelchair down, but her daughter usually does it. Her daughter picks her up every morning on her way to work and takes her to this community center everyday so she can get out and socialize and such.

This is where this guy comes in, I like to call him Young Douche. YD is your typical piece of shit in that he is super obnoxious in everything. He drives a suped up Subaru that’s really loud and plays his music so loud I can hear the bass from upstairs. Also he likes to park in the one handicapped spot. Our apartments management is super shitty and they don’t get involved with anything and refused to get involved with this.

Now before he moved in my neighbors daughter used to park in the handicapped spot to pick up her mom, but since this dickhead started parking there she’s had to park in front of his car so she can get her mom. I tried to be nice and left a note on his car but nothing really changed but it was no big deal at first.

One morning I’m asleep and get woken up to this guy just holding down his horn non stop. My neighbors daughter had parked in front of him and he couldn’t get out. When I looked outside I could see him get out and start harassing both my neighbor and her daughter.

I could hear him talking shit so I put some pants on and walk outside and see dude all in the daughters face. She’s like 4'9 so he’s looking down on her like he’s gonna punch her, then my neighbor tried to calm him down and she put a hand on his elbow and he slapped her hand away hard.

I saw that and ran downstairs but as soon as I opened the gate and he saw me he backed off and got back in his car then started honking his horn again. I waited there until they​ left, then he left, not before he flipped me off while driving away.

So at that moment I knew I had to fuck with him. My other neighbor knows him and told me about dude. Apparently he’s big in the custom Subaru scene and he does shows and shit with his car all the time. He has sponsors that sometimes give him parts and they use his car in their ads I guess.

Anyway It took me awhile to come up with  some good revenges so I’d do simple stuff. I had expired milk in my fridge because I really don’t drink milk often but I like cereal occasionally and just had some, so I’d start putting a little bit all over his car when I got home. After awhile you can smell rancid milk all over it. But that wasn’t enough.

I needed a real big Fuck You so my other friend found out he had this big show coming up and dude had a photographer come and take pictures of him with his car. The night before the show​ I go to AutoZone and get the shittiest Decals and bumper stickers I can find and spent about an hour and a half putting these all around his vehicle. When I was done it looked horrible. I even did a swastika of Honda, Ford, Lamborghini and Fiat decals on his hood. While nothing I put wouldn’t permanently damage his vehicle, it would take hours to take it all off.

So about 6 am when I guess he was going to the show I hear screaming. He’s yelling so loud that some other neighbors go outside and see what’s up. When they see it’s him they laugh and go back inside.

He then called 911 and they show up but it’s not like there’s anything they can do. Then the cop actually gives him a ticket for parking in a handicap spot without tags then they left.

Apparently he had to make that show for his sponsors or else they were gonna drop him, supposedly he was hard to work with and it was the straw that broke the camels back.  

Now even after all that, dude STILL kept parking in the handicapped space. Eventually when I got home from work I’d just start throwing trash on his hood. I once threw a chocolate shake at his windshield.

Seeing this car in the handicapped space every night really pissed me off for some reason. Anyways he eventually moved out . Still hate that guy though.