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oh my GAWD

Dating Robert:

What I expected: Sexy, cool knife dad that will take me out on motorcycle rides and hot dates at 1 am.

What I got: My name is Robert Small. I’ve never believed in ghosts until I came face to face with one. So I set out on a quest to capture what I once saw onto video….With no big camera crews following us around, I am joined only by my fellow investigator Val and our equipment tech Mary Christiansen. The three of us will travel to the some of most highly active paranormal locations, where we will spend an entire night, being locked down from dusk until dawn….Raw…Extreme…These are our Ghost Adventures.

Time for us to investigate the library, as Shaggy and Scooby investigate it, too! 

Meta-investigation is so in these days.

So, a few things to note:

1. Shaggy stands close to the ladder 

2. He’s only surrounded by books

3. He reaches for a set of blue books

4. There’s one set of three square Possibly Drawers™ to the right of Scooby

Possibly Drawers™ – for all your uncertain, theoretical storage needs.

Cut to closeup. All of a sudden,

1. The ladder has gotten bored and left

2. Three more Possibly Drawers™ appear, one featuring the all-new Embossed Sun model

3. Half the set of blue books ran away to follow its dreams 

4. Scooby’s set of Possibly Drawers™ left with the blue book, presumably to star in a different cartoon

I like how Scooby stares up in confusion at where they were a second ago.

Cut to closer-up. Miraculously,

1. Shaggy’s book has transmogrified into an even-bigger brown one

2. Their contracts unrenewed, all Possibly Drawers™ have scramoosed entirely out of the scene 

3. The new heights and colors of nearby books have been determined via a dartboard and blindfold

4. The dictionary is half the size of the book on lizards, so we know the owner of the spooky mansion clearly has their priorities in order

so I’ve recently become a father and I’m very much enjoying it! 

I really didn’t think I’d end up loving this particular dad so much but it turns out he’s a massive nerd with a knack for history and who am I, if not a weak gay who loves nerds with pretty hair who love history