a study in atonement

17 may 10:49am // in a sick sort of way, i miss studying for english lit. didn’t end up using atonement in the end for my comparative essay exam, but it was my favourite text to analyse (picturing james mcavoy’s face while reading didn’t hurt). hauling ass on the last two french exams - i’m so close to the finish line!

Fascination and Functionality (or the one with Jace 'cockblock' Wayland)

It was only five in the afternoon as dictated by the gunmetal glow from the daytime clouds fading into evening sky that had darkened the living room until the glimpse he got through the crack in the door was just a shadowy mass.
Streetlights below had flickered laboriously to life one by reluctant one like artificial star pinpricks and Alec could almost foster some pity for those on patrol right now.
This was the type of weather that sunk deep and grey into your bones, and you were always surprised it wasn’t technically raining because damp held heavy in the air like leftover smoke. It was the type of night he was usually called out in as when the bleakness had dulled everyone else’s senses he was always primed enough to be trusted to spot if there was a demon down the alleyway or a vampire glancing down warily from a fourth-storey window.
Somehow he was never needed as much during the summer months.
Yet somehow he was spending this afternoon not just lounging about Magnus’s loft but on his bed. For the last half hour they’d barely spoken, preferring to reside in a zen hush over the covers that felt like water beneath Alec’s fingers with Magnus tucked under his arm and legs wedged over legs and the rhythmic exhaling of soft air on his collarbone and the circular smoothing of his thumb absently on Magnus’s shirt and it was strange and lovely and relaxing all at one once.
Alec didn’t really know if this was normal or not. Beds, in his mind, had a purpose which was sleep and once the allotted sleep was over it was to be vacated with immediate haste lest he was late. He wasn’t one to indulge in long mornings in like the ones Izzy and even Jace occasionally had a penchant for.
Kitchens were for quick meals, studies were for revising paperwork, bathrooms were for brisk showers after hunts. Yet round Magnus’s, as often happens, functions were whatever he desired them to be and more often than not things were more decoration than practicality as he’d realised when trying to figure out the properties of an old gilt grammar-phone to which Magnus had replied with more than a hint of amusement, “Oh that old thing? Well, it’s always a conversation piece if nothing else,” and had had to hold back a laugh at how the answer floored Alec.
Kitchens were now for long three am talks over camomile tea and a Bloody Mary or seraph blade washing if he’d just arrived from a fruitful hunt.
Bathrooms were for emergencies when Magnus didn’t want his couch stained with ichor and for biweekly hair dye experimentations.
Studies were less for studying and more for long slow sessions atonement style pressed up against bookcases and over the desk.
And bedrooms, well, Magnus never really seemed to sleep and sex was always cautiously on the agenda but as a general rule it was the home of hands carding through air, of arms thrown over waists, of kisses pressed into hair. He didn’t know quite how to encapsulate it like a form of meditation except he felt more than reflected.
A cold band of metal brushed against his forehead as Magnus traced a finger down Alec’s half closed eyes.
“Oh teach me, how I should forget to think.”
Alec hid a smile, reaching up to catch Magnus hand in his own and curl up into him, letting his eyes shut fully, “By giving liberty unto thine eyes. Examine other beauties.”
Magnus threw his arm over his eyes and proclaimed in a mock shakespearian dramatic, “But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east and Alexander is the sun!”
He bit his lip to try and stop the flush that rose up his cheeks but he was sure Magnus noticed it anyway, “That’s not the next line.”
“I didn’t know the next line. You trumped me with your Romeo knowledge.”
“When you’re too young to hunt there isn’t much to do around the institute.”
Magnus raised himself on one arm. The sky outside had burned to a navy blue which cast shadows that curved like tender fingers across his throat, under the sharp cut of his cheekbones and cobwebbed in his hair like a real life Chiaroscuro but all the more beautiful because it was Magnus and no one could hold a candle to Magnus.
“Are you telling me you memorised the entire of Romeo and Juliet because you were bored?”
Alec tried and failed to look enticing, “Is that sexy?”
Magnus snorted derisively and dropped back into the bed. “Alexander,” he spoke with a great deal of chargin in his voice, “You could read Dr Seuss and it would be sexy.”
“I-I don’t know what to say to that.”
Magnus rolled over so he was facing Alec nose to nose. The mere sudden proximity made Alec’s breath catch in an embarrassing way and Magnus’s gravelled murmur removed the chance of breathing altogether.
“I was implying that you’re sexy.”
“I-uh, I gathered that.” He gulped suddenly. It seemed the bedroom might fulfil one of its functions after all.
“Mmm,” Magnus’s nose travelled up across Alec’s cheekbone and his lips traced all the way back down across his neck like a butterfly leaving a trail of blotchy heat spots behind, “So you going to do anything about it?”
Alec didn’t really want to say the horrendously promiscuous things that had popped into his head so he closed his eyes for a second and decided to let his lips do the taking. Magnus didn’t seem to complain.

Maybe then seconds passed, maybe a minute-it could have been an entire month for all Alec was aware right now- but the wrought metal of the bed frame was brushing his back and a lapful of Magnus was plastered against him in all sorts of delicious ways and he leaned forward to bite his Adam’s apple and Magnus let out a sudden groan that sounded strangely like a door swinging open which was weird, it’s only five isn’t it, and-
“Hey-oh god, guys!”

May Study Challenge day 29-Why did you start a studyblr?

I wanted to inspire and motivate myself while hoping to do the same for others. I started the day after gcse results day (I’m now in year 13) and I instantly fell in love with the aesthetic side of the studyblr community. Now I understand that the ‘aesthetic’ side isn’t always the truth of studying and I love that side of the community even more because it is real.

Photo above: mindmap on Atonement for English

Welcome back to Meta Station! Join us (OR DIE!) for a new installment of “Pike Apologism With Claire,” our Luna speculation, Jesus Kane Superstar (wait or is “Jesus Christ SuperKane” better, I’VE SPENT LIKE 5 FULL MINUTES ON THIS), Erin screaming about that Bellarke scene, a timely reminder that Jaha has ALWAYS been a garbage person, a veritable Kentucky Derby’s worth of Trojan Horses, Claire screaming about that Kabby scene, our thoughts about vengeance and atonement, and a higher-than-usual amount of giggling.  PLEASE ENJOY.


0:00 – Love Means Never Having to Call Shotgun
0:03 – Octavia and Bellamy Finally Make Some Progress, THANK GOD
0:07 – Okay but We Call Bullshit On Octavia Making That Fire with Wet Wood
0:16 – This Is the Part Where Erin Screams About Bellarke, SORRY NOT SORRY
0:21 – Wanheda, Vera Kane, Atonement and Forgiveness
0:35 – Bible Study With Claire, Part 1: “Jus Drein Jus Daun” vs. ”An Eye For an Eye”
0:42 – Seriously Can Someone Explain Why Bellamy and Lexa Aren’t Allowed to Be Important to Clarke at the Same Time Because We Think It’s Garbage
0:48 – THE HUG!
0:53 – DELINQUENT FLASHBACKS!
1:00 – Welcome Back to Pike Apologism with Claire, Today We’ll Be Discussing How JAHA IS THE FUCKING WORST
1:07 – Unity vs. Division, Enemies Within, and the Pike/Indra/Murphy Rebel Squad of Our Dreams
1:13 – Bible Study with Claire, Part 2: Excuse Me, Do You Have a Moment for Our Lord and Savior Marcus Kane?
1:16 – Unity Day Was Bullshit and Also Erin Hilariously Can’t Pronounce It, I Left In One But She Seriously Fumbled It Like 3 Times
1:19 – Has Jaha Fucked Up ALIE Way More Than ALIE Has Fucked Up Jaha? TALK AMONGST YOURSELVES
1:25 – A Veritable Kentucky Derby’s Worth of Trojan Horses
1:27 – Strong Minds, ALIE’s 3% Rejection Rate, and Kabby (Hopefully) Rebelling in the City of Light
1:33 – This Is the Part Where Claire Screams About Kabby, SORRY NOT SORRY
1:43 – Here’s a Story About How Claire Has No Chill
1:44 – Luna kom Floukru: The Hero Gotham Needs and Deserves
1:54 – We’re Shipping Luntavia and We’re Not Apologizing (Also, R.I.P. Bartender Mechanic)

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usatoday.com
Georgetown to atone for its role in slavery
Georgetown University, the oldest Catholic institution of higher learning in the USA, will take a series of steps to atone for the role that slaves played in its early history, the school’s president is expected to announce on Thursday.

As part of the plan, the university will offer a formal apology for the school’s role and create an institute for the study of slavery at what is also the nation’s oldest Jesuit university, officials told “The New York Times.” It will also offer preferential status in admissions to descendants of the slaves it once kept.