a strong black woman

medium.com
The Most Overlooked & Underrated Characters in ‘Get Out’ Are Black Women
By B. Willis

[U]nlike Logan and Walter, who apparently needed a camera’s flash to “wake up,” Georgina was the only one whose black consciousness broke through without an external trigger. She also seemed to have the greatest internal struggle when she was in close proximity to Chris. Which means she was fighting the hardest but it wasn’t even for herself. That is what’s heartbreaking.

I’m not sure that Peele did this intentionally, but Georgina is the embodiment of the two-edged sword that is the “strong black woman” stereotype. It’s this idea that Black women can’t be broken, that we don’t crack under pressure, that we make the best of our circumstances, or that we don’t need support. While this stereotype is founded in some truth (black women are some of the most magical and persevering beings I know), it also builds up a myth about black women and our ability to maneuver through life. We can be broken. We do crack under pressure. Sometimes, our circumstances get the best of us. And no matter how stable we are, we ALWAYS need support.

Very Important PSA

So, it hasn’t even been a week, and I’m already seeing “Black Panther’s race doesn’t matter, we’re all human” shit. And you know what? I ain’t here for that shit. Tell, MCU fandon:

Where was “We’re all human” when ya’ll were erasing Rhodey and calling him “Rodney?” 

Where was “We’re all human” when ya’ll were blatantly mischaracterizing Nick Fury, making fun of his disability, and saying “He curses too much”?

Where was “We’re all human” when ya’ll convinced yourselves that Sam Wilson was actually a secret HYDRA agent? Where was “We’re all human” when ya’ll turned Sam Wilson into the Avengers’ personal house Negro? 

Where was “We’re all human” when ya’ll turned Heimdall into “The human telescope”? 

Where was “We’re all human” when ya’ll ignored Gabe Jones?

Where the fuck was “We’re all human” when ya’ll erased Mike Peterson’s son, Ace, and then said Mike would be used as a vehicle for Ward’s redemption?

Where the fuck was “We’re all human” when Trip died?

Where the fuck was “We’re all human” when ya’ll were demonizing Jason Wilkes for being Peggy Carter’s love interest? 

Where was “We’re all human” when Ben Urich was murdered in a graphic, dehumanizing way on Daredevil?

Where was “We’re all human” when Will Simpson  Oscar Clemons was burned alive on Jessica Jones?

Where was “We’re all human” when Jessica weaponized her white womanhood and pushed Malcolm Ducasse into a crowded room full of white people and said “He lunged at me”?

Where was “We’re all human” when Malcolm was expected to do massive amounts of emotional labor for white people who treated him like shit? With no reciprocity? 

Where was “We’re all human” when Luke Cage was being abused by Jessica?

Where was “We’re all human” when the MCU fandom decided to make Luke Cage their white fave’s bartender, and resident expert on superhuman sex? 

Where was “We’re all human” when Tessa Thompson was casted as Valkyrie, and confirmed to be Thor’s new love interest, and the entire Thor fandom attacked the character saying “Why does she need a love interest? She’d be better off alone” Even though the “Strong Black Woman Who Don’t Need No Man” has roots in dehumanizing Black women. 

Where was “We’re all human” when Zendaya was rumored to be playing Mary Jane?

Where was “We’re all human” when people were campaigning for a Miles Morales movie and the MCU Klandom rose up and said “Well, Peter’s just more iconic”?

Where was “We’re all human” when the MCU fandom was blantantly hating on Claire Temple? Where the fuck was “We’re all human” when the MCU klandom was dead set against Claire as a love interest for Matt? 

Where was “We’re all human” when the MCU fandom was demonizing T’challa for trying to find out who killed his father? 

Where was “We’re all human” Mordo came onto the scene, and ya’ll ignored him while ALSO swearing that you all LOVE “Complicated villainous/gray characters”?

But now that Black fans have Black Panther,  a character and a world that celebrates us,  suddenly its “We’re all human”? Suddenly it’s “AllHeroesMatter”? Suddenly its “You Black fans are the reason no one wants to use the Black characters”? 

Ya’ll can miss me with that bullshit, cuz I ain’t havin’ it. Did ya’ll think we just forgot about all that bullshit? We’ve been dealing with your bullshit for years now, and we’ve got the receipts. So no. Black People are gonna have our moment. We’re gonna have our movie, and the rest of ya’ll can stay the fuck out of our tags. 

10 Ways You Can Support Black Women

1. Stop slandering our natural features. Stop with the dark skin jokes. Stop with the natural hair jokes. Stop dehumanizing black women for our features. Black women–especially young black girls–internalize these “jokes” and grow to sincerely hate their blackness. Cut it out.

2. Respect our choices. All of them. You don’t have to like it but you need to respect it. If we choose to wear our natural hair, respect it. If we choose to wear weave, respect it. Stop chastising us for the choices we make for ourselves. Stop policing how we choose to live our lives. Let us be great. Gahdamn.

3. Stop with the respectability politics. You can’t say you love black women and then pick and choose which black women you’ll respect based on your standards. You still give a black woman respect regardless of how she chooses to live her life. You respect all black women because we are human just like you, not just the ones who wear natural hair, listen to erykah badu and shit.

4. No means no. If you approach a black woman and she says she’s not interested, oh my fucking god, my nigga, just leave her alone. Move on. Let it go. Please do not persist. Take the rejection gracefully. Don’t call her out name, don’t follow her, don’t assault her. Let her be. She doesn’t owe you an explanation. Her “no” is enough and you will deal my friend. 

5. LISTEN. Bruh, when black women are telling you something you’re doing is harming them, can you put your ego aside and just L I S T E N. Why is that your first reaction is to get defensive? If you love black women like you say you do, wouldn’t you want to know when you’re doing something harmful to them? Stop getting defensive every time a black woman calls out your misogynoir. Stop brushing that off as “bashing black men.” Stop calling black women “shea butter bitches” for calling out how you harm black women. Black women are just asking for empathy at the end of the day. That’s the least you can do.

6. Stop slut-shaming. Stop shaming black women for their sexuality. Stop calling black women “thots” and all kinds of hoes because her sex life is something YOU disagree with or because she presents herself in a way that conflicts with YOUR standards. Someone’s sexuality has nothing to do with you and you don’t have the right to police what a woman does with her body. Stop reducing a black woman’s worth because you don’t like what she does with HER body.

7. Understand that our identity intersects. Stop telling black women they have to “pick a side.” Black women aren’t black men or white women’s “side kicks.” We are our own people with our own unique struggle that, yes, may have similarities to BM’s and WW’s struggles, but is not identical to theirs. We are black and we are women. You can’t be an ally to black women and not be intersectional when our existence is the epitome of intersectionality. Black women don’t just experience racial violence, we experience gender violence as well. Stop insisting that we have to divide our identity down the middle to suit you.

8. Say something when you see black women being attacked. When you see black women being harassed online and offline, do something. Ya’ll gotta start holding each other accountable. Stop @-ing me telling me how terrible it is that I’m being attacked. @ ole dude who’s attacking me. Tell them to stop. Have my back. Intervene in the best possible way you can. Stop allowing the violence against black women to persist right in front of your eyes.

9. Please kill the “strong black woman” narrative. Placing this title on us constantly, denies us humanity. Black women aren’t allowed to be vulnerable like everyone else. We’re constantly told be strong or we’re written off as only angry and bitter. We’re told how we’re suppose to feel and how to respond to violence against us. Black women are humans. We laugh, we cry, we smile. We can’t be your idea of “strong” all the time.

10. Show up for black women. Black women consistently show up for everyone else but when it comes time for us, hardly anyone is there to be found. Police brutality doesn’t just happen to black men. Recognize it. Know the names of the many black female victims of state violence. Know their stories. Share their stories. Fight for them like you fight for Eric Garner, Tamir Rice, and Sean Bell. Fight for black women like black women fight for you. Organize and show up for black women. Stop leaving us hanging. Stop expecting our support and giving us little to none in return.

goggles-and-gears  asked:

(1/2)So, my main character identifies as African American, but I am worried that I might have accidentally made it seem like only lighter/mixed African Americans would be of value? I tried to subvert the 'black men can't/shouldn't be fathers' trope, and so her biological father is a white man who abandoned her mother when he realized she was pregnant. Her mother and father are both rather dark-skinned, very smart (they both work at Harvard, or used to - her mother may have moved on), and happy.

(2/2)My main character would only know the second man her mother ended up loving, and it would have been most of her life - they met right after her mother was left, and although they didn’t start dating until my MC was about a year old, it’s been so long that she wouldn’t remember a time without him. But I’m worried - would people be more likely to see it as saying that white men can be less reliable than AA men, or would it seem like I would only ever write someone who’s lighter?

Subverted Absent Black Father + Single Black Mother

Mixed-Race Light-skinned MC

I’m not too concerned with the mixed race light-skinned Black MC. It’s always great to portray dark-skinned monoracial Black women, yeah, and when folks (who aren’t of the identity) constantly/only create mixed race characters, particularly light skinned, that’s when I feel weird. Otherwise, it’s never a problem in itself.

 However, mixed race B+W doesn’t equal light-skinned. Genetics work how they want. Mixed race people come in all shades and hair textures. There are mixed b&w people with light skin and 4c afro hair, medium brown skin and straighter hair, dark brown skin and loose curly hair, etc. So your concern about writing someone lighter is erased if you just make her not so light.

 My issue is the absent father aspect of your question.

 Absent Father - Abandoned Black Woman

 If you have the missing parent for essential plot reasons, then I won’t encourage you to write that out. I will tell you that making the deadbeat father into a white man doesn’t erase all harm. The Absent Black Father not only demonizes Black men, but, when one’s involved, devalues Black women.

 Trace your logic. Why do we need to keep placing Black women in situations where they’re discarded and devalued? Subversion isn’t always desired in terms of representation. Personally, I feel that not perpetuating the harmful piece of representation in the first place is preferred to putting a “twist” to a trope.

 Let me emphasize what Elaney said in the mod wishlist regarding the representation we (as mods) want to see: 

 Lastly, I personally do not want these tropes to be explored and subverted by people, I want them to be avoided entirely because I feel that normalizing positive representation rather than commenting on negative representation is far more beneficial and validating to the people these works are supposed to help and represent. We don’t need sympathy, we need empathy!

Your ask works under the impression that there has to be an abandoning parent element in the first place.  Does there, truly, for significant plot reasons? There wouldn’t be a need to subvert anything if there was no abandoning parent in the first place. Honestly it seems more “revolutionary” to have two parents together these days. What’s cliche is there always needing to be an abandoning/missing/dead + single parent element going on.

Black women are often deemed as perpetually single, good for sex but not a relationship, and as the least attractive. Media conveniently considers romance overplayed when it comes to Black women, while white women in the same books and shows are given relationships. Tons of sh**ty articles and “stats” are published that serve only to call Black women ugly and unworthy and essentially just put us down.

 By having this white man abandon the Black woman, it’s going down that same path of portraying Black women as less desirable and worthy of support.

 Of course, these things happen, whether it’s a father devaluing a Black woman as the underlying reason or their separating under common differences. Such stories can still be written, and there’s indeed a place for them…in the right hands. It’s always best left to those who have the experience or those willing to dedicate themselves to research, fact and nuance-checking with appropriate beta-readers.

Giving the mother a new, loving relationship does help amend the Black woman/devalued aspect well, though. The new father being a Black man is also a positive touch. Giving the mother a support group (people who love and support her platonically) always helps too, especially during the time of abandonment, as would most suggestions in the Strong Black Woman tag.

 ~Mod Colette

it is good to be critical of fanfiction and fanart

fiction, whether fanwritten or “professionally” written, is one way stereotypes pervade modern culture

mandingo, hot latin lover, greedy jew, evil bisexual, weak white woman who needs rescue, strong black woman who don’t need no man, promiscuous gay (who then gets AIDS and “learns their lesson”)

whether you believe it or not, these are harmful to the people that are stereotyped this way in the “real” world

words have meaning and being told your words mean bad things is not an “attack”, it’s the opportunity to grow and i’m frankly tired of seeing all of this “don’t like, don’t read” shit used to defend racism, fucking goddamn nazis, sexism, brutal sexual assault, goddamn motherfucking pedophiles and other actually harmful shit

it’s okay to write to examine certain topics, but when you glorify it in your fiction piece and make it seem okay, you truly are part of the problem

fanfiction/fanart is media to be consumed by whatever masses exist and, as such, we should all remain critical when certain themes begin to appear because this is how fucked up shit is normalized: through uncritical media consumption

Before I post anything else, first and foremost I have to show all the love in the world to Sonequa Martin Green. This woman is so underrated as an actress and her portrayal of Sasha was a great source of inspiration. Another representation of a strong, brilliant and resilient black woman, her significance to TWD cannot be devalued or underestimated. In the face of unspeakable odds she managed to push through and that’s a struggle that so many of us face every single day. Michonne and Sasha represent the magic within black women and the validation that comes from that is indescribable. I think TWD did a great job with sending Sasha and Sonequa out with pride and dignity. This is only the beginning for Mrs. Martin Green. Shine on queen. Thank you for sharing your gifts with us. 🙏❤👑

9

World Class.

2012 WOMEN’S WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS SILVER MEDALIST
3X USA BOXING NATIONAL CHAMPION
U.S. OLYMPIC TEAM TRIALS BRONZE MEDALIST


Raquel Miller, San Francisco, Ca.

Shot at: Donaire Sr. Boxing Gym.

Oakland, Ca. 2015.


8

In response to anyone who thinks they have an fierce inner black woman in them and is not in fact, a black woman

See the thing about that fire and that “fierceness” is that it’s born out of our oppression, out of always being told that we are ugly, that our bodies are too fat or too muscular, that we don’t have the right kind of hair – and having to deconstruct all those things and tell ourselves that we are beautiful even though society is telling us that we are not.  

That strength is born out of always having to defend ourselves against white supremacy and anti-black-woman-patriachy. From years of not seeing ourselves represented in anything aligned with beauty, of buying products that are made to make us look like not ourselves.

So there is no way you could have an inner black woman in you. You have not experienced our struggle, you don’t know it, you haven’t lived it, and you can’t imagine it. 

See, you can’t sit with us, because we haven’t been able to sit at your table since our existence in this country. And while we were being excluded from your table we made our own, and it is fabulous and fly. And of course you now want to try and have a seat at our table, take our table, use it and ignore all the labor that went into creating THAT table.

But nah, sorry boo boo.

You ain’t never going to be us, you can try to wear your hair like us, you can try to dance like us, talk like us, wish you were us, but know this – 

YOU-WILL-NEVER-BE-US