a new people

anonymous asked:

Hi bee!! I know you love your dog a lot but are there any other animals you love a lot too? I love birds so much! they're amazing. You live in new zealand right? there is so much amazing wildlife there, I would love to visit new zealand

this is a bird post about new zealand birds and their ratings bc why not really

this is the tui:

they’re exceptionally beautiful and have a gorgeous song, but don’t be fooled because they’re super territorial with other birds. like to show off their neck ruffs like little gentlemen in cravats. score: 5/10.

this is the kea:

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they are mountain parrots, and really super smart. they’ll also destroy your car, your tent, and basically anything you leave lying around too long

here’s a video of them playing with road cones

here’s a video of them destroying a cop car because they’re fucking criminals

score: 9/10.

these are pukeko:

weird looking birds, their babies look like soot sprites with legs. also they’re natives but they’re super annoying and they have no road sense so often jump out in front of your car like idiots. 

score: 3/10.

these are kereru:

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they’re the bumblebees of the bird world??? super fat and not very aerodynamic looking but somehow still manage to fly. they are quiet until they take off at which point they scare the absolute shit out of you. they spend a lot of time eating native berries which is honestly relatable. score: 5/10.

this is the ruru:

they’re our native owls and i mean come on. look at it’s face. 8/10.

kiwi:

our national bird. looks like a fruit. can’t fly. only comes out at night. it doesn’t get much better than this. 10/10.

kakapo:

embarrassingly bad at reproducing. also can’t fly. famous for shagging the head of a bbc cameraman one time. 15/10.

anyway. come to nz. hang out with our birds.

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I am a way off achieving my dream of becoming one with my paras, I want to be long
Like himmm but I’ve got so long to go :} one day…one day………they will be real in THIS world

today i was closing an account at the bank. i explained to the teller it was because of monthly fees, and the teller asked if i was a “college or high school student” because they have no fee accounts for them. i turn 27 in 2 months.

yikes don’t look down on new fans/people who have been fans shorter than you