a monkey could do what i do

reveluve  asked:

one piece !!!!!!!!! !!! ( you knew that was coming )

HERE WE GO I WAS READY FOR THIS 

OKAY SERIOUSLY THEY ARE JUST PERFECT TOGETHER I DON’T CARE, JUST LET THOSE TWO BE HAPPY AND WITH LOTS OF CUTE PIRATE BABIES I SWEAR- I WENT CRAZY FOR THEM I CANNOT HOLD IT ANYMORE!


Bonus (because I’m a sinner and I could actually ship Luffy with any living thing on this Earth):

Shit my physics prof says
  • “And that’s exactly why your hand is attached to your body and doesn’t randomly fly through the room!”
  • “Alright, just let me use my crossbow for this.”
  • “Did I just shoot you? I didn’t mean to shoot you!”
  • “Why wouldn’t you have a random morning star laying around?”
  • “Don’t fucking leave your spoon on the moon then!”
  • “I’m probably going to kill one of you. Anyone wanna go first?”
  • “It’s like you parked your car on the sun. Same result.”
  • “Who else am I going to ask how to get rid of a body then?”
  • “Math doesn’t have any feelings, but you can hurt it anyway.”
  • “Are we doing voodoo now? We’re doing voodoo now.”
  • “I pretty sure a demonic thing ate it. That’s the only explanation.”
  • “Like, imagine you go on a nice trip… but in space!”
  • “I wanted to tell you an epic story, but my wife said no, so the epic story didn’t even happen.”
  • “Of course we could always just set it on fire and see what happens.”
  • “Nothing to feel loved like talking to yourself in a room full of people.”
  • “Well, it’s supposed to be done that way but — scratch that, it never works.”
  • “You disturbed the monkey!”
  • “Why did none of you get me coffee. I hate all of you.”
  • “There’s three types of people. Star Wars fans, Trekies, and idiots.”
  • “No. I just like blowing stuff up.”
  • (Imitates chainsaw noises.)
  • “Oh, come on, you can’t all be saving Hyrule at the SAME time.”
  • “Everything gets better with breadsticks.”
  • “OH MY GOD, THE ZOMBIE OUTBREAK. THEY ARE COMING.”
Leave This Town- Epilogue (End)(Mechanic!Bucky AU)

Characters: reader, Bucky, Tony Stark, Pepper, DumDum Dugan, Peter Parker, others mentioned.

Summary: After leaving the small town life behind, you’ve worked hard to make your dreams come true. Your second chance with Bucky is not without its challenges, but you’re both determined to make it work. But eventually, a decision must be made in order for you to fully be together. How can you choose? Or will it be made for you? 

Song Inspiration: Angela by The Lumineers

Warnings: Tiny bit of angst, mostly fluff. Mention of pregnancy. 

Word Count: 3.7k

Tags are at bottom (TAG LIST IS CLOSED I’M SORRY)

**This fic is for @bionic-buckyb ‘s 5K AU Writing Challenge**

A/N: This is it, you guys! The end of this series. I’m a little sad to say goodbye to these characters. They’ve been my constant companion for the past 3 months and on my mind for 6 months before that. I’m ready to take a little break and then move on to something new, though. I really hope you like this epilogue. Please let me know your thoughts! I always love to hear from you! I love you all!!

<<<Part 12   Epilogue (End)

Leave This Town Masterlist

Full Masterlist

_________________________________________________________

Originally posted by nerdyfandomimagines

Two Years Later

Cruising down the small town’s Main Street, you turned the steering wheel sharply and pulled into the auto shop’s dusty lot before parking the ’67 Chevy Impala out front. You jumped out of the driver’s seat and headed straight for the main office, throwing the door open roughly before entering.

“Hey, DumDum. Where is he?” you asked, never slowing a step.

“Afternoon, Y/N,” the mustachioed man replied, answering your question by hooking his thumb toward the garage.

Stepping into the cavernous garage, you searched for the long-haired brunet but grew impatient. “James Buchanan Barnes!” you shouted into the echoing space, then seeing a head pop up in between cars.

Keep reading

Disney Villain Sentence Starters

Evil Queen

“Silence! You know the penalty if you fail.”
“I’ll share a secret with you. This is no ordinary ____, it’s a magic wishing ____.”
“One bite, and all your dreams will come true.”
“Now, make a wish, and take a bite.”
“I’ll fix ya! I’ll crush your bones!”
“All alone, my pet?”

Strombolli

“There! This will be your home - where I can find you always!”
“You will make lots of money… For me!”
“QUIET! Shut up before I *knock* you silly!”

Lady Tremaine

“Well, I see no reason why you can’t go… if you get all your work done.”
“Get up. Quick, this instant! We haven’t a moment to lose!”
“You clumsy little fool!”
“Oh. Well, don’t just stand there. Bring up the breakfast trays at once, and hurry!”
“Hold your tongue! Now, it seems we have time on our hands.”
“Wouldn’t you prefer to eat when all the work is done?” 
“What on earth have you’ve been doing?”
“It would be an insult to take you to the palace dressed in these old rags.”
“I forbid you to do this!”
“How charming, how perfectly charming.”
“Why? Because YOU are *young*, and *innocent*, and *good*, and I…”
“And so, I lived unhappily ever after.”

Queen of Hearts/Red Queen

“I warn you, child… if I lose my temper, you lose your head! Understand?”
“Your way? All ways here are my ways!”
Curtsy while you’re thinking. It saves time.”
“How would you like to have your head hacked off?”
“Never mind him/her. (S)he’s mad.”
“It is far better to be feared than loved.”

Captain Hook

“Thank you, me dear, you’ve been most helpful.”
“So passes on a worthy opponent.”
“Good, then let’s have at it!”
“And that’s why I asked you over, my dear.”
“A jealous female can be tricked into anything.”
“Oh, a little persuasion might be in order.”

Maleficent

“Why so melancholy? A wondrous future lies before you - you, the destined hero(ine) of a charming fairy tale come true.”
“Oh, they’re hopeless. A disgrace to the forces of evil.”
“Touch the spindle. Touch it I say!”
“You poor, simple fools. Thinking you could defeat me.
Well, here’s your precious *(prince)ss*!”
“Are you sure you searched everywhere?”
“I must say, I really felt quite distressed at not receiving an invitation.”
“Oh dear! What an awkward situation.”
“This curse will last till the end of time! No power on ____ can change it!”
“I like you begging. Do it again.”

Cruella DeVil

“You can’t possibly afford to keep them. You can scarcely afford to feed yourselves.”
“Come now, I’m being more than generous.”
“Do as you like with them! Drown them!”
“But I warn you, ____, we’re through. I’m through with all of you! I’ll get even. Just wait.”
“I’ve got no time to argue. I tell you, it’s got to be done tonight!”
So they thought they could outwit ____?”
“What kind of sycophant are you?”
“We lose more women to marriage than war, famine, and disease.”
“Darling, red isn’t your color.”
“Be sure to let me know when the blessed event occurs.”
“My faith in your limited intelligence is momentarily restored.”

Madame Mim

“Now, first of all, if you don’t mind, I’ll make the rules.”
“Sounds like someone’s sick. How lovely.”
“So, my boy/girl, I’m afraid I’ll have to destroy you.”
“Yeah, I-I’ll give you a sporting chance. I’m mad about games, you know.”
“And (s)he must see something good in you.”

Shere Khan

“I can’t be bothered with that, I have no time for that nonesense.”
“Perhaps. But at the moment I’m searching for a ____.”
“Why should you run? Is it possible that you don’t know who I am?
Precisely. And you should know that everyone runs from ____.”
“Ah, you have spirit for one so small.”
“Now, I’m going to close my eyes and count to ten. It makes the chase more interesting… for me.” 
“Does my face not remind you of what grown man can do?”
“All I ask for is one thing and you denied me. Well that ends now.” 

Edgar

“You’re going to ____ if it’s the last thing I do.”

Sheriff of Nottingham

Now, take it easy, ____, I’m just doing my duty.
Listen, ____, you’re mighty preachy and you’re gonna preach your neck right into a hangman’s noose.

Prince John

“____, with you around, who needs a court jester?”
“You’re never around when I need you!”
“I told you never to mention ____’s name!”
“Get out of that if you can.”
“I sentence you to sudden, instant, and even immediate death!”
“My dear, emotional lady, why should I?”
“Young love, your pleads have not fallen upon a heart of stone. But traitors must die!”
“This crown gives me a feeling of power! Power! Forgive me a cruel chuckle. Heh-heh-heh. Power.”
“Stop sniveling and hold still.”

Madame Medusa

“You must gain their confidence… make them like you.”
“Now, I’m going to let bygones be bygones. Do you know what would make Auntie/Uncle ____ very happy?”
“Of course, you have. But we must try harder, mustn’t we?”
“Adopted? What makes you think anyone would want a homely little girl/boy like you?”
“Not until you get the diamond!”

Amos Slad

“Watch it, that thing’s loaded.”
“____, get back in there before I break your other leg.”

The Horned King

“You’ve interfered for the last time!”
“Perhaps it would interest you to see what fate has in store for you.”

Ratigan

“Oh, my dear ____. I’m afraid that you’ve gone and upset me. You know what happens when someone upsets me.”
“You don’t know what a delightful dilemma it was, trying to decide on the most appropriate method for your demise.”
“Oh, I had so many ingenious ideas I didn’t know which to choose. So I decided to use them all.”
“You should have chosen your friends more carefully.”
“All will bow before me!”

Sykes

“Three sunrises. Three sunsets. Three days, ____.”
“So, ____. Did we bring something green and wrinkly to make ____ happy?”
“If you don’t have my money…”
“Now, I lent you some money, and I don’t see it. Do you know what happens when I don’t see my money, ____?”

Ursula

“So much for true love!”
“My dear, sweet child. That’s what I do. It’s what I live for, to help unfortunate ___, like yourself, poor souls with no one else to turn to.”
“It’s she who holds her tongue who gets her man.”
“Oh, and there is one more thing. We haven’t discussed the subject of payment. You can’t get something for nothing, you know.”

Gaston

“It’s not right for a woman to read. Soon she starts getting *ideas*, and *thinking*…”
“How can you read this? There’s no pictures!”
“This is the day your dreams come true.”
“Say you’ll marry me.”
“If I didn’t know better, I’d think you had *feelings* for this monster.”
“It’s over, ____! ____ is mine!”

Jafar

“You will order ____ to marry me.”
“____ *will* marry me!”
“You’re speechless, I see. A fine quality in a wife.”
“I am your master now!
“Trust me, my friend. You’ll get what’s coming to you.”

Scar

“Life’s not fair, is it?”
“And you… shall never see the light of another day.”
“Ahh, so you haven’t told them your little secret.”
“Oh, no, ____. Perhaps *you* shouldn’t turn your back on *me*.”
“Well, I suppose you’d have found out sooner or later, you being so clever and all.”
“And remember… it’s our little secret.”
“Oooh… I quiver with *fear*…”
“I’m *surrounded* by idiots.”
“Run. Run away, and never return.”

Governor Ratcliffe

“I’ll have your head for this!”
“How dare you!”
“Well, I’ll just have to take it/you by force then, won’t I?”
“This is my land!”
“I make the laws here!”
“That’s what guns are for.”
“A mans not a man unless he knows how to shoot.”

Frollo

“How dare you defy me!”
“Mark my words, —, you will pay for this insolence.”
“Look at that disgusting display.”
“I know you helped him/her escape.”
“You idiot! That wasn’t kindness, it was cunning!”
“Dear boy/girl, whomever are you talking to?”
“I think… you’re hiding something.”
“I’ll find her/him. I’ll find her/him if I burn down all of ____!”
“And this my thanks for taking you in and raising you as my son/daughter?”
“These people are traitors, and must be made examples of.”
“I can save you from the flames of this world, and the next. Choose me, or the fire.”
“You’ve chosen a magnificent prison, but it is a prison nonetheless. Set one foot outside, and you’re mine.”
“You don’t know what it’s like out there. I do. I do.”

Hades

“So you took care of him, huh? “Dead as a doornail.” Weren’t those your *exact* words?”
“Okay, fine, fine. I’m cool. I’m fine.”
“I need somebody who can… handle him/her as a (wo)man.”
“Well, you know, that’s good because that’s what got you into this jam in the first place, isn’t it?”
“You sold your soul to me to save your boyfriend/girlfriend’s life. And how does this creep/bitch thank you? By running off with some babe.”
“(S)he hurt you real bad, didn’t (s)he, ___? Huh?”
“We dance, we kiss, we schmooze, we carry on, we go home happy. What do you say? Come on.”
“____, ____, ____, my sweet deluded little minion. Aren’t we forgetting one teensy-weensy, but ever so crucial little, tiny detail? I own you!”
“____, listen. Do you hear that sound? It’s the sound of your freedom, fluttering away, *forever*!”
“I can’t believe you’re getting all worked up over some “guy/chick.””
“Now you now how it feels to be like everyone else. Isn’t it just peachy?”
“____, my little flower, my little bird, my little *nut*-____. What exactly happened here?”

Shan-Yu

“I tire of your arrogance, ____. Bow to me!”
“Looks like you’re all out of ideas.”
“You took away my victory!”

Clayton

“Go ahead. Shoot me. Be a (wo)man.”
“Why? For 300 pounds sterling a head.” 
“Actually, I have you to thank, old boy/girl. Couldn’t have done it without you.”

Yzma

“Excellent. A few drops in his/her drink, and then I’ll propose a toast, and (s)he will be dead before dessert.”
“Just think of it as you’re being let go, that your life’s going in a different direction, that your body’s part of a permanent outplacement.”
“I know. It’s called a “cruel irony”, like my dependence on you.”
“It is no concern of mine whether or not your family has… what was it again?”
“Take him/her out of town and finish the job now!”
“Why do we even *have* that lever?”
“____! Why did I think you could do this? This one simple thing! It’s like I’m talking to a monkey.”
“Fired? W-W-What do you mean, “fired”?”
“Why, I practically raised him/her.”
“That is the last time we take directions from a ____.”
“This had better be good!”
“_____ is dead, right? Tell me ____’s dead. I need to hear these words.”

Commander Rourke

“What’s to know? It’s big, it’s shiny, it’s gonna make us all rich.”
“It’s called natural selection. We’re just helping it along.”
“Looks like all our chances for survival rest with you, ____.”
“Well, as usual, diplomacy has failed us. Now, I’m going to count to ten, and you’re going to tell me where the crystal is. One, two, nine…”
“I love it when I win.”
“I consider myself an even tempered (wo)man. It takes a lot to get under my skin, but congratulations, you just won the solid-gold kewpie doll.”

Scroop

“____ should learn to mind their own business.”
“Maybe your ears don’t work so well.”
“The girl was sniffing about.”
“It’s that boy/girl. Methinks you have a soft spot for him/her.”
“I say we kill ‘em all now.”

Oogie Boogie Man

“Well well well. What have we here?”
“So you’re the one everybody’s talking about?”
“It’s much more fun, I must confess, with lives on the line.”

Dr. Facilier 

“Gotta hand it to you, ____. When you dream, you dream big.”
“Don’t you disrespect me, little man/lady!” 
“You’re in my world now, not your world.”
“Y'all should have taken my deal.”

Mother Gothel

“Look in that mirror. I see a strong, confident, beautiful/handsome young lady/man. Oh look, you’re here too.”
“I distinctly remember, your birthday was last year.”
“YOU are not leaving this tower! EVER!”
“Great. Now I’M the bad guy.”
“____, please, stop with the mumbling. You know how I feel about the mumbling. Blah blah blah blah blah, it’s very annoying!”
“Dear, this whole romance that you’ve invented just proves you’re too naive to be here.”
“Why would (s)he like you? Come on now, really. Look at you! You think that (s)he’s impressed?”
“Please speak up, ____. You know how I hate the mumbling…”
“Oh, ____, do you even hear yourself? Why would you ask such a ridiculous question?”
“Everything I did was to protect YOU.”
“Where will you go? (S)he won’t be there for you.”
“Now, now, it’s all right. Listen to me. All of this is as it should be.”
“You want me to be the bad guy? Fine. Now I’m the bad guy.”
“The world is dark and selfish and cruel. If it finds even the slightest ray of sunshine, it destroys it!”

King Candy

“Sad as it is, ____ can not be allowed to ____.”
“I’m not against her/him! I’m trying to *protect* her/him!” 
“Welcome to the boss level!”

Prince Hans

“Can I say something crazy? Will you marry me?”
“Oh, ____. If only there was someone out there who loved you.”
“I, on the other hand, am the hero who’s going to save ____ from destruction.”

Bellwether

“It’s still my word against yours.”
“It really is too bad, I… I did like you!”
“I framed ____; I can frame you too!”

Yeah, right, Will can do whatever he wants – PART 2

Again. The leaning. If Hannibal’s…vertical stuff could talk.

The touching

The coming at your house because I don’t give a fuck about what you’re doing and… Do you have a life? Who cares?

The ass sitting

The door opening without the knocking

THE LADDER!

The sitting on a chair that’s not meant for other people apart from Hannibal.

The putting the arms on shiny polished tables.

The occasional seizures all around the place

The stealing

The restless walking around.

The hiding in high places like monkeys.

And the last but not least sleeping in the car while Hannibal is driving like he is some kind of taxi driver.

Yeah, right, Will can do what he wants – PART 1

For some context - SEASON 1


Will is a lucky lucky guy. He has privileges in season 2 as well…

Phantom of the Opera Asks

1) Prologue (Monkey Music Box) – Is there something you wish you could forget?
2) Overture – Do you play an instrument?
3) A Rehearsal for Hannibal – Have you ever been in a theatre production?
4) Think of Me – Is there someone you think about every day?
5) Angel of Music – Do you believe in the supernatural?
6) Little Lotte – Who is your oldest friend?
7) The Mirror (Angel of Music) – Are/were your parents very strict?
8) The Phantom of the Opera – Do you like haunted houses?
9) The Music of the Night – What is your sexual orientation?
10) I Remember/Stranger Than You Dreamt It – What is your most memorable dream?
11) Magical Lasso – Have you ever said something you regret?
12) Notes – Have you ever gotten anon hate?
13) Prima Donna – Do you like being the center of attention?
14) Il Muto (Poor Fool, He Makes Me Laugh) – Have you ever cheated on a partner?
15) Why Have You Brought Us Here?/Raoul, I’ve Been There – Where do you feel safest?
16) All I Ask of You – What do you look for in a partner?
17) Masquerade – How different are your public and private personas?
18) Why So Silent? – Have you ever made a room go completely quiet?
19) Notes II – How well do you take direction?
20) We Have All Been Blind – Do you think you’re clever?
21) Twisted Every Way – Is there someone that you have mixed feelings towards?
22) A Rehearsal for Don Juan Triumphant – Have you ever seen a ghost?
23) Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again – If you could bring someone back from the dead, who would it be?
24) Wandering Child (Angel of Music) – Do you think cemeteries are romantic?
25) Don Juan Triumphant – Have you ever pulled a prank on somebody?
26) The Point of No Return – What can someone do to seduce you?
28) Down Once More…/Track Down This Murderer – What is the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for you?

Hamiltots Fanfic

Maria’s problem pt 1

Alex and John were playing in the sandbox during recess. Alex was driving a truck back and forth, making a path. He then put Phillip on the truck and made it go along the path. It was his favorite thing to do. Suddenly, John nudged him with his elbow.

“Hey Alex, Who’s that?” John asked, pointing to a girl in a red dress standing next to a tall boy in a hat. They were standing next to other tall boys by the basketball court. Alex smiled.

“That’s Maria and James Reynolds!” Alex said. “Remember when I told their mom about James being a bully and he got gr-oun-ded?” John nodded.

 “Did he stop bullying her now?” John asked. Alex shrugged.

“Let’s go find out!” Alex said standing up and brushing his pants off. He and John raced across the schoolyard. They were almost there when they saw James reach out and hit Maria on the head. They both stopped and gasped.

“Brat! I told you to not embarrass me in front of my friends!” Alex and John heard James say. Maria rubbed her head and mumbled that she was sorry. James rolled his eyes.

“You always say that. If you were really sorry, you wouldn’t even be around me.” James said, as he pushed her away. Maria shuffled away and sat on the swing. Alex and John looked at each other, then ran to Maria together.

“Maria!” Alex called, waving. Maria smiled.

 “Hi Alex! Hi John!” She said. “How are you guys?” Alex and John both gave her a hug, then stood in front of her.

“Why is James hitting you still? I thought your mom told him to stop?” Alex asked. Maria sighed.

“She did, but he still hits me when we’re at school, ‘cause momma isn’t here to stop him.” She said looking down, seeming embarrassed. Alex hugged her again and sighed sadly.

“That’s not fair!” He said, looking at John, who had an equally sad look on his face.

“Hey Alex! Hi John! Hello Maria!” The 3 turned and saw the Schuyler sisters, Angelica, Eliza, and Peggy, walking toward them. Eliza was the first to notice Maria’s tears and quickly went to dry them.

“Maria! Are you ok? Are you hurt? What happened?” She asked, hugging her. Maria smiled.

“I’m ok.” Maria said, lying. John shook his head.

“She is not ok!” John said. “James is still being a bully to her at school because his mom can’t stop him here.” Angelica and Peggy gasped, and went to hug Maria with Eliza.

“Maybe Hercules has an idea!” Peggy said. “He’s a great spy! He’s training me to be one too. He has a lot of im-por-tant work to do, but maybe he’ll help us!” Peggy ran off to where Hercules and Lafayette were on the monkey bars.

 “Maybe Thomas could help us too!” said Angelica, ignoring the frown from Alex.

“Ok. I suppose he could help us.” Alex agreed. Angelica ran off to where Thomas, James Madison, and Aaron Burr were taking turns on the slide.

Soon, Alex, Eliza, John, and Maria were joined by Hercules, Lafayette, Peggy, Angelica, Thomas, James Madison, and Aaron. They all sat in a circle, thinking about what to do.

“Maybe we could just talk to them?” suggested James, hugging his blanket higher around him and sniffling.  His cold had come back. Thomas shook his head.

“Alex said they already tried that.” Thomas said.

 “What if we just fight them?” Hercules asked, putting his fists up. “We’re pretty strong, and if we all fight together, we might win!” This time, Maria shook her head.

“No, James is too big. Plus, he has his big friends to help him, too.” She explained with a sigh. “Besides, momma said to treat others the way you want them to treat you.”

“Well your frère (brother) is doing a horrible job of following that rule.” Lafayette huffed. Aaron drew with his finger in the dirt. Alex played with a button. Angelica braided, and unbraided her hair. They were all deep in thought until the bell rang for them to go inside.

 “Maybe we’ll think of something next recess.” said John, trying to make everyone feel better. Maria nodded.

 “Thanks you guys for trying to help.” Maria called as she walked to her own classroom. The others made their way to Mr. Washington’s room.

“Don’t worry.” Eliza said, hugging Alex’s arm. “We’ll think of something.”

Alex nodded. “I hope so.”

This Evergreen Love (Part 3)

Originally posted by deanjackles

Summary: Enjoy World’s Best Dad? Check out the third part from Dean’s perspective…

This Evergreen Love Masterlist

Pairing: single parent!Dean x kindergarten teacher!reader

Word Count: 3,200ish

Warnings: language, injured Dean

A/N: Written in Dean’s POV…


Keep reading

Welcome To The Paladins

Part 1:

When Keith woke up he had no idea where he was.
Last thing he remembered was walking down an alleyway wondering where he was going to sleep that night…
Then nothing.
He tried to move but found his hands chained to a stone wall. Keith tried to use his fire to melt the metal but found he couldn’t concentrate, whatever they had drugged him with was still in his system.
He tried to pull his tail free from his pants hoping to maybe break the metal or stone.
However he found it was also chained to the wall and could barley move it.
“What the hell is going on?!” Keith hissed to himself not expecting and answer.
“Your gonna play! Play play play.” A deranged voice came from the darkness followed by a laugh.
“Who’s there! Why am I here!” Keith demanded struggling against his reatraints.
Suddenly the figure ran towards him so that he was so close all Keith could see was a pair of brilliant blue eyes.
He jerked back in surprise hitting his head against the stone wall.
“Ouch”
“Did that hurt?” He asked as he dropped the the floor sitting cross legged staring up like a child in a class room.
Keith couldn’t help but stare.
The man, well boy really couldnt of been much older then 17. He looked deceptively skinny, with long lanky limbs.
But Keith could see compact mucles hiding beneath his tattered shirt and shorts.
However what really caught Keith’s attention was his skin.
From what Keith could see, not a single patch was free from some kind of scar.
Old beneath new, layer upon layer of pain and suffering showed on his skin.
Yet he was smiling like he couldn’t be happier.
“W-what…” Keith asked having not actually heard him.
“I asked if it hurt? How did it feel!” He asked excitedly scooting closer.
“Erm… a little sore but nothing bad.”
The boy pouted but a smile quickly returned to his face “but what does that feel like?”
Keith shrugged “I don’t know… why don’t you hit your own head if your so desperate.”
He shook his head, his long matted hair releasing a shower of dirt and bugs.
“I can’t. I don’t feel.”
Keith looked at him for a moment about to ask what he meant when the door swung open and a man with long white hair walked in. He placed a hand on the boy’s head like he was a bag and smirked down at Keith.
“So nice to see you awake, I was beginning to worry you would miss the show.”
“Show?” Keith asked glaring up at the man. He recognised him from last night. He had been following him but when Keith had turned to confront him, he was gone.
“Why yes, you and my little pet here will be putting on a very special performance.”
“Like hell I will! I’m no ones dancing monkey!” Keith yelled baring his sharp teeth.
However the man only smiled “now that’s what I want to see! Show me that famous fire of yours went you get out there!”
Keith’s eyes widened, this guy knew what he was and what he could do. Worse from the sounds of it he wanted him to fight the poor grinning boy.
“I won’t fight him, he wouldn’t last two seconds.”
The man laughed “oh I’m sure Claw here will provide you with more then a fair fight.”
Keith rose his eye brow.
“I see you doubt my pet, well they all do.” The man chuckled as he walked off leaving Claw still staring at him.
Keith looked at him with new eyes, of the guy was so confident he could last against a demon in a fight then he must be pretty powerful.
“What can you do anyway?” Keith asked only for Claw to shrug.
“This and that and this and that and this and that.” He laughed madly like what he had said was the funniest thing in the world.

The chains were suddenly released and Keith rubbed his wrists. The door in front of them opened and Claw jumped up excitedly skipping out. Keith followed him, his eyes widening at the sight of thousands of people sitting behind a electrified fence and cheering loudly.
The sandy ground was hovered in pools of fresh blood and various weapons were dotted around the place.
“Ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to a very special fight today!”
“Right… look I’ll try to go easy, then maybe we can get out of here together?” Keith whispered but Claw wasn’t listening, he was too busy playing to the crowds. Blowing kisses and waving like it was all a game to him.
It was then that Keith realised that he was completely insane.
“Because today is our very own Claws anniversary of coming here 15 long years ago!”
Keith stared in shock, if this guy had been here for that long and lived… then maybe he was more of a threat then he thought.
“Now without further ado. Let the fight begin!”
Keith barely had a chance to process the new information before Claw was jumping towards him with a knife aimed at Keith’s throat.

  • Luffy: OU! WHAT ARE YOU DOING, BIG BROTHERS?
  • Sabo: *Lying in the grass.* Nothing.
  • Ace: *Lying in the grass next to him.* I challenged him to see who could do nothing the most since Garp took off to do Marine stuff.
  • Ace: So far I’m losing…somehow.
  • Luffy: THAT SOUNDS… BORING?
  • Luffy: LET ME JOIN YOU!!
  • Sabo: At least you won’t be losing now, Ace.
  • Ace: That doesn’t make me feel any better.
Ingrained Forever

A/N: This is my idea. I needed Spencer Dad fluff, so here it is. :D 

                                                               —-

“Y/N! Honey! Get out here!”

Without thinking, I dropped the towels I was folding and ran outside to where Spencer and the baby were. Nothing in his voice said cheerful; it said panic. So I ran. And what do I see?

Our 3-and-a-half-month old baby girl, Chloe, propped up against a couple of pillows and Spencer hiding behind his hands. “You have to see this,” he said without taking his eyes off Chloe. “Also, you might want to get your phone out.”

“What is it?” I asked hotly. “You called me out here and it sounded like you were panicked.”

Spencer glanced over, his eyes alight with a joy that hadn’t been able to shine through since the day Chloe was born. Not that anything was wrong - everything was great, more than great - but also very, very tiring, like seriously tiring. My own mother told me that having a baby was exhausting. Unbelievably exhausting. But truly, I had underestimated what having a new baby was like. Unequivocally tiring and also the greatest thing that had ever happened to me. “She’s laughing,” he finally said.

My heart jumped. No fucking way. “Seriously? Like, for real? She’s laughing? I think I’m gonna cry.”

“Look.” He smiled before turning back toward Chloe. “Hey, Chloe. Look at Daddy.” Having known Spencer for years, I could tell you using the fingers on one hand the amount of times that my husband had looked this happy. Our wedding was one. Chloe’s birthday was another. And this was definitely one more. “Peek-a-boo!” The second the words left his lips, he wiggled his fingers and the most joyous, high-pitched sound emanated from those beautiful chubby cheeks.

“Oh my god, Spence, do it again.”

Honestly, I had never heard something so beautiful in all my life. As Spencer continued to wiggle his fingers and make silly noises, Chloe continued to babble, her laugh filling my ears with the sweetest sounds imaginable. “Spence, she’s beautiful, oh my god, I can’t. Let me try.”

My amazing, beautiful, dorky, full-of-love husband scooted over just slight so I could prop myself up on my elbows next to him and repeat what he’d been doing. “Hello my beautiful baby. Chloe, look at Mommy.” Those cheeks. They were bright and red and full of life, her toothless little grin making my heart race at the speed of light. There were few people I loved more than words could describe, and I didn’t think it was possible to have that love for another person until Chloe was born. 

There was nothing I wouldn’t do for her.

And right now there wasn’t anything I wouldn’t do to make her laugh. If I had to dance around the apartment like a monkey and make all sorts of noises, I would do it again to hear that beautiful sound. “Can you pull out your phone while I do this?” I asked.

Spencer reached into his back pocket and grabbed his phone, talking to Chloe about how she was the most beautiful, precious being he’d ever seen in his life. “Okay, I’m ready,” he said, biting his lower lip to keep from cracking his face apart through the widest smile imaginable. “I need this for when I’m on a case and I need to smile.”

“Peek-a-boo!”

She started laughing even harder than before. “Spence, it’s like a full-on person laugh, not just a little baby laugh!” How was this possibly coming out of our three month old. 

“Keep doing it!” He needled, playfully punching me in the arm. “Do it until she stops because this is the greatest thing I’ve ever seen.” He was enthralled. Every time I made faces at Chloe, I would turn to see Spencer’s gaze fixed on her; his brain was spinning, trying to etch this moment into his mind for the rest of his life. 

When someone was on their deathbed, it was said that their lives flashed before their eyes; if that’s true, both Spencer and I would remember this moment. 

After nearly a half hour of hearing Chloe laugh, she stopped, looking around the apartment as best she could given her movement capabilities. “I’m gonna start making dinner and then maybe you can finish while I feed her?” I asked. Breastfeeding had never been something I imagined doing, and at first it was weird, but I loved it now and after such elation I wanted to feed my munchkin myself instead of Spencer using a bottle. 

“Sounds good,” he replied, putting his phone back in his pocket and crawling toward Chloe. “Until then, I am going to assault her with kisses.”

Popping up from my position on the floor, I grabbed Spencer’s face in my hands and planted a smooch on him. Parenting was insanely difficult, but also one of the greatest things I have ever done, and I’m pretty sure Spencer feels the same way. “I think she’ll like that.”

Her hitch-pitched giggle nearly brought me away from preparing dinner, because she screeched with joy as Spencer planted kisses all over her tiny tummy. Occasionally, Spencer would speak in baby talk, but more often than not, he would speak to her like a person, and as I put a pot of pasta on the stove, I heard Spencer speak softly to our daughter and couldn’t help but tear up. 

“Hey Chloe, Daddy loves you, you know that right?” 

Smooch.

Giggle.

“I love you and Mommy more than anything else in the world, okay?”

Giggle.

Smooch.

“No matter what happens, ever, in your whole entire life, I love you, little girl.” 

“Ow!”

“What the hell was that?” I asked, turning around to see Chloe’s hands hitting Spencer’s cheeks. 

“She’s smacking my cheeks after I just proclaimed my love! Nice Chloe!”

I snorted and walked over, planting a teeny kiss on my baby’s cheek. “Maybe she’s just trying to hug you, did you think of that?”

“She’s too young for that,” he laughed.

True. She was probably just smacking him in the face because it was fun. But that didn’t keep me from thinking it. “I mean, you never know. Maybe she’s a genius baby like her Daddy.”

@coveofmemories @jamiemelyn @sexualemobitch @unstoppableangel8 @iammostdefinitelyonfire26 @rmmalta @lukeassmanalvez @yoinkpeter @the-slytherin-ice-queen

anonymous asked:

hi! i just found your blog and i love it! thank you so much for doing what you do! i was wondering, if thats not too much to ask, if you could give me a few correspondences to Goddess Persephone, like the post you did for Hades. I understand if you're busy or if its too much work to do. Sorry to bother you and thank you, either way! <3

You are so sweet! Persephone is one of my favourite Goddesses. Here are some correspondences. 

Symbols: Spring, flower crowns, torch, waterfalls

Sacred Animals: Bats, rams, parrots (and all talking birds), monkeys

Plants: Pomegranate, narcissus, willow tree, all types of lily, ivy, maidenhair fern, daisy, lavender, mint (must be destroyed)

Scents: Floral scents (especially narcissus and hyacinth), almond, vanilla, bergamot 

Gems and Metals: Crystal, quartz, agate, black onyx, pink tourmaline, sapphire, obsidian, mercury, coral, jasper

Colours: Green, black, light blue, purple, magenta, yellow

Offerings to Persephone:

  •  anything with pomegranates
  • asphodel, willow, and cypress 
  • flowers and flower crowns
  • any crafts including flowers
  • bat shaped items
  • floral incense or floral perfume
  • water infused with herbs or fruit (including tea)
  • honey and wine
  • wheat and grains
  • parsley
  • seeds/growing plants, gardening
  • crushed, torn, or boiled mint
  • wearing dark red lipstick 
  • honouring the dead
Dragon Ball Z Abridged - Quote Ask Meme/Game

The rules are simple: Just send me one of these DBZA quotes to get my muse’s response!

  • I swear, I don’t even know what’s going on anymore.
  • I’m Vic Mignogna! Ahh my poor vocal cords!
  • OH, GO FUCK YOURSELF!
  • Now they’ll just waste their lives in a futile struggle to measure up to their peers until they’re nothing more than a crumpled heap of countless failures of broken dreams.
  • It’s edited by the Tiger Kitty!
  • If he could be any more of a whore for Adobe, they would’ve branded their logo on his ass.
  • I am hilarious and you will quote everything I say.
  • Oh no, I’m not a monkey! Oh no, the kid’s a monkey!
  • Hey, let that (name) alone!
  • Maybe I’m gay. Or maybe stereotypes are bullshit.
  • Guess I’ll do what any sensible Middle American would do in this situation: GIT MAH GUN!
  • BOOBS! I mean, (name)… Hi!
  • Yes, (name), I’m a green freakin’ dinosaur.
  • Nerd!
  • Take that, moon. Perfect orbit, my ass.
  • Hi, I’m (name)! And this is (name). He/she was a prison bitch!
  • I’m gonna eviscerate you and use your gastrointestinal tract as a condom while I fornicate with your skull! 
  • DODGE!
  • Okay, consider yourself beef jerky while I’m Filet Mignon.
  • The eye! The eye! Why is always that goddamned eye!!??
  • We’ve been flying for two weeks now, and I’m starting to feel very tensed up. Not just for being trapped on the ship of course, but from (name) walking around in nothing but his/her underwear! I would relieve this tension, but I’ve had no alone time as the toilet KEEPS SCREAMING AT ME!!
  • So in short, shit be whack, yo!
  • Dammit, there is no muffin button!
  • I’m sorry, but if this shit goes any further south, we’re going to hit Space Mexico.
  • Freakin’ weeaboo.
  • I’m coming, (name)! Quick, grab my balls!
  • Oh no, that minion died. Could you go fix that? We’ll continue this conversation never. 
  • Freaky Alien Genotype.
  • Now let me put this in a way you’ll understand; I’m about to blow my load all over your insides.
  • I need an adult…
  • I am an adult!
  • Big talk coming from a bipedal bitch.
  • ALL OF MY HATE!
  • Son of a gum-chewing funk monster! Why the fruit does all this funny stuff happen to me? Forget my life! Always surrounded by miserable failing clods! It’s like this whole world just likes to bend me over and find me in the Alps! Like I’m some sort of shlock receptacle! Well as far as I care, these miserable cows can have a fancy barbecue, WITH A GODDAMN PIG!
  • Why can’t I feel my everything?
  • Every party needs a pooper, that’s why they invited you. Party pooper. Party pooper.
  • Renegade for life.
  • I never left, sir. I was outside, hitting my head against the wall for 20 minutes.
  • And so I tell him, ‘I don’t care who you are, now clean my jowls!’
  • Well Sir, if you’re having a problem with our Customer Support you can call 1-800-eat-a-dick!
  • Oh god. NATURAL LIGHT!
  • Did you try working the shaft? 
  • Somehow we made this into a three-way. 
  • I feel that they have finally summoned the dragon. Would be a reeeal dick move to die right now…
  • Ahh, if we had junk you’d be gay right now!
  • YOU CAN WIN! YOU FEEL GREAT! YOU! CAN! DO! THIS!
  • I’m beginning to think I have issues.
  • Hax! I call hax!
  • See, it’s like I told you, (name). “Like a bitch.”
  • You know what? All of you better duck, because I’m about to turn left and I don’t want to SMACK YOU WITH MY DICK.
  • Hey, I’m just like any other guy. I pay my taxes one leg at a time! 
  • There you go again, throwing your hands up in the air like you just don’t care. CARE, DAMN IT!
  • I’M SO FUCKING HIGH RIGHT NOW.
  • Why aren’t you upstairs sleeping with your girlfriend like everyone else?
  • Y'all are bitches.
  • Oh a momma’s boy huh? I’ll be your mommy.
  • It’s called man-scaping.
  • …the fuck’s a condom?
  • Sooooo… Wanna go drive cars?
  • Look at my nipples, LOOK AT THEM!!
  • (name) JUST DONE STOLE MY GLASSES!
  • I was desperate and needed the money. And no, it wasn’t worth it.
  • Oh come on man! You couldn’t last, like, 30 seconds!?
  • And the prodigal asshole returns!
  • My heart is pure. Pure, unadulterated badass.
  • Oh, crapbaskets.
  • OK, first: What?! Second: The fuck?!
  • Oh my God, I solicited my son for sex.
  • Wow, you are just the Grand Central Station of disappointment, aren’t you.
  • Societal definitions of beauty are BS anyway.
  • All these squares make a circle, all these squares make a circle, all these squares make a circle… 
  • Ohhh no. Oh, really wish I hadn’t! It’s all over my hand! Oh god, it’s sticky! And now it’s starting to harden! Oh no!
  • Could you speak up? I’m not wearing pants.
  • IS THAT ME STRONGER THAN ME?! I’LL FUCKING KILL ME!!
  • I’m coming, I’m coming… I came. Heh.
  • I AM THE HYPE!
  • At this point, it’s a game. If he gives in, I win. And he knows that.
  • NOTICE ME!
  • When mine left, she took all my money. When yours left, she took all her money.
  • Booby bomb!
  • Sometimes you’ve got to know when to hold 'em, and know when to fold 'em. And right now, it’s foldin’ time. (name)! Grab M'Dick! 
  • STOP FISTING ME!
  • Bitch, I’m adorable.
  • You’re either perfect or you’re not me.
  • You know! If I had a watch, I’d be looking at my wrist really condescendingly right now…
  • Well, I’d say I should’ve seen this coming, but that would be ironic.
  • I CAN SEE THE FUTURE!
  • My nipples are rigid right now!
  • Well, I sure hope someone picks up that phone…because I fucking called it!
  • I'MMA PLANT ME A DUMBASS TREE!
  • Seriously kid, if you don’t start bringing me meat I am literally gonna shit bricks.
  • Wow, I can’t remember the last time someone actually nutted up and asked for that. Congrats! Can’t wait to hear how you fuck this up.
  • Everyone’s getting sucked today!
  • Friggin’ hell. Last time I take on a guy with a pole that big.
  • He keeps kicking me in the dick…Why? Why does he keep kicking me in the dick?!
  • I have many things…a best friend that’s a turtle, an island, chlamydia… This…is not one of them. 
  • No, you said “Hey, check this shit out!”, then jumped in a car!
  • HOW DOES IT FEEL RIDIN’ M'DICK?! 
  • Look at my trucker hat!
  • Nobody’s killing that idiot but me!
Bad Moon Rising (Part 3)

Originally posted by dean-sam-winchesterbros

Summary: Jensen and the reader are doing some filming out in the Canadian wilderness when they decide to take a short hike during a break. The only problem is they don’t show up for their scene later that day…

Part 1 Part 2

Pairing: Jensen x reader

Word Count: 4,400ish

Warnings: language

A/N: Hope you enjoy this final part!…


Keep reading

‘Ello Love CrowleyxReader

Word Count - 897
Warnings - Mild Language

Summary - Crowley makes a visit to a distressed reader

Your name: submit What is this?

A long, hot bath is all (Y/N) could think of as she drove home from a hunt. Her clothes were tattered and torn, and she was covered from head to toe in blood. The night was still young and (Y/N) decided that she was going to have a glass of wine while she bathed.

She was only five minutes away from her house when her car broke down. “Balls!” (Y/N) shouted as she slammed her fist on the steering wheel. “Why now?” 

Leaning back in the driver’s seat, she closed her eyes. A few seconds passed before (Y/N) opened them again. When she did she felt like she wasn’t alone anymore. “Having car trouble, darling?” A smooth Scottish accent kissed her ears.

“Damn it, Crowley!” (Y/N) yelled as she regained her composure. “You almost gave me a heart attack.”

Crowley caressed her cheek. “No fear, love. I would have revived you.”

(Y/N) shot him a warning glare. “I would rather stay dead.” She teased.

“Darling, I’m hurt.” Crowley whined furrowing his brow.

“You could have gave me a warning before you popped in. What are you doing here anyway?” (Y/N) asked, unbuckling her seat belt and getting out of the vehicle.

Crowley followed. “I couldn’t leave a damsel in distress.”

(Y/N) groaned as she examined the engine. “If you really want to help me go fetch Dean.”

“Monkey…” Crowley griped. “Let me help you.”

(Y/N) sighed and closed the hood of her car. “What could you possibly do?”

A sly smile appeared on the demon’s face. “Darling, I’m the King of Hell. I can do anything.” With a swift snap of his fingers, Crowley transported them to (Y/N)’s driveway.

“Is it fixed?” She asked.

“I’m not Harry Potter, love. I can’t do magic.” Crowley put his arm around (Y/N) and started walking her to her door.

“But you just said—”

“I know what I said, Darling. Now go on inside and I’ll fetch Squirrel in the morning.”

(Y/N) rolled her eyes at Crowley and unlocked the door to her house.

“Can I—?” He was cut off by a door being shut in his face. Crowley stood on her porch for a few minutes hoping (Y/N) would let him in. Eventually, he poofed off to Lucifer knows where.

In the bathroom, (Y/N) undressed and ran her bath water. She was grateful that Crowley had healed her with his demon mojo or her bath wouldn’t be so pleasant.

(Y/N) climbed into the tub and laid her head back onto a towel. The aroma of her lemongrass scented bubble bath filled the room. Soon enough (Y/N) was tranquil and all of the stress of the days hunt swiftly melted away.

“Ello’ love.” Crowley greeted from the doorway.

“Oh my God!” (Y/N) screeched, trying to cover her exposed body with bubbles.

“Fraid’ not, try again.”

“Jesus Christ!” She yelled once more.

“Try King of Hell. Darling, are you feeling okay?” Crowley sat on the edge of the bathtub and placed his hand on (Y/N)’s forehead.

“Crowley, I’m okay. You just scared me.” (Y/N) responded, swatting Crowley’s hand away.

He handed her a glass of Champagne. “It’s not wine, but I think you’ll like it just as much.”

She grabbed the glass and downed it in one drink. “Thank you.”

“Monkey, are you sure you’re alright?” Crowley asked with concern laced over his weathered features.

(Y/N) sunk lower into the water and closed her (e/c) eyes. “I’m just tired is all. I haven’t had a minute to relax in forever.”

Crowley stood up and walked over to the linen closet. He pulled out a fresh white towel and held it up. “C’mon love, I’ll help you relax.”

(Y/N) raised a thin, feminine brow. “I’m not letting you see me naked.”

Crowley gave her an ‘Oh really?’ sort of look before making the water in the bathtub disappear.

“You son of bitch!” (Y/N) cursed as she stood up and yanked the towel from his hands.

Crowley tried his hardest to hold in his laughter but he was failing miserably. “Oi! That’s my mother you’re talking about.”

On cue, (Y/N) stormed out of the bathroom and sat on her bed. “What the hell was that Crowley?” Her face was as red as a cherry tomato.

“I just want you to relax.”

She scoffed. “You can make my bath water disappear but you can’t fix my car?”

Crowley turned around while he tried to think of something to say that wasn’t going to piss (Y/N) off. “I wanted us to have some alone time.”

“Alone time? Do you see what happens when we’re alone?”

“Monkey, you’re over reacting.”

(Y/N) stood up and walked into her dressing room. “I’m getting changed. DO NOT come in here!” She warned.

She came out a short time later wearing a pair of silky shorts and a white tank top.

“Darling, if you don’t mind me saying. You look absolutely gorgeous.”

(Y/N) smiled and reclaimed her seat on her bed. “Thanks.”

Crowley sat down beside her and started to rub her shoulders. “Please let me help you relax.”

“Fine, but no funny business or I tell Dean.”

Crowley agreed and continued rubbing her shoulders, then her back. Before he knew it, (Y/N) was fast asleep.

“Poor thing, she hasn’t slept in days.” Crowley kissed her on the forehead and covered her with a blanket. “I’ll check on you tomorrow, love.”

Ignoti Nulla Cupido (19/20).

Prompt: Nat came to you in order to keep her and Tony’s promise to keep you safe, but how would they react when they’ll learn about the secret you’ve been keeping since you left Bucky’s side?

Word Count: 1 063.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader.

Warnings: Nope.

A/N: Hate me here.
Thanks @evanstanss again for looking at this for me!

Previous Part - Next Part.

Originally posted by buckypupbarnes

The room was quiet, Bucky and (Y/N) were the only ones left standing beside his HYDRA friend. Blood and scratches covered every bit of skin the eye could meet, but their deepest wounds were the ones that couldn’t be seen. Both their hearts ached with sorrow and despair as his words sank in.

It was a subtle movement when Jay finally stepped forward, meeting both of them. His eyes were blank once again and Bucky knew they must have wiped him after their small talk. A devious smirk in his lips as he moved forward, hands reaching for them.

He felt it shortly afterward, the deep cuts in his skins and the blood pouring from his mouth while (Y/N) laid immobile on the floor, tears falling down from her eyes. It didn’t matter how hard Bucky fought against Jay’s mental control over his body, his son had the upper hand in that fight.

Keep reading

fanamc  asked:

Hi hi! About that squirrel monkey haha I bet Kuro knew all the time and he knows where is it didn't he? Have a wonderful day/night ^_^/

[PART ONE] 

[The Voltron Family PART TWO] It was one of the rare times Kuro decided to visit during his me-time-away-from-military-service as Shiro’s twin brother would like to put it. There was a knock on their front door and there stood his brother with his bag.

“Takashi!” Kuro greeted, arms open wide for a hug. 

“Welcome back,” Shiro smiled, returning the hug. “How long will you be staying anyways?”

“Please, Takashi,” Kuro rolled his eyes. “Let’s not talk about that. Where’s Keith and my little soldiers?” 

“UNCLE KURO?!” Lance screamed. His little footsteps were heard until he came to a halt, seeing his favourite uncle. He threw himself at the older man and pampered him with kisses. “I’ve missed you!”

“Missed you too, General,” Kuro cooed. 

The rest of the kids came down from the second floor to greet their uncle and after a promise of playing games and story time, Shiro got his brother all to himself by the kitchen. 

“Where’s my darling Keith?” Kuro looked around as he sipped the tea Shiro handed to him. “Did you divorce my precious love?” He looked at Shiro in shock. “My poor baby! How could you?!”

Shiro rolled his eyes. “Keith and I are still married.”

“Dammit.” Kuro cursed. 

“He’s still at work, but he’ll be here in an hour or less,” Shiro said. “I do have something to talk to you about.”

“If you’re still worried, I’m not gonna steal Keith away from you. Please, I have more tact than that,” Kuro mused. 

“Oh believe me, I’m not worried about that,” Shiro smirked. “It’s about a monkey.”

Kuro choked on his tea.

“Do you happen to know anything about an eight grand squirrel monkey?” Shiro raised an eyebrow.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Kuro shifted his body away from his brother. “Hey, did you do something with your kitchen?”

“Granite,” Shiro answered nonchalantly. “We both know you don’t care what shit I do with my house.”

“Hey! I care about you and your beautiful family and obviously I care what kind of environment you live in. I live here! Sometimes.” Kuro gasped, offended. 

Shiro leaned on the table and glared at Kuro. “Where is the squirrel monkey?”

“I made a promise to Keith that I would never tell a soul! It’s a bro thing!”

“You’re staying under my roof, so you better tell me what the hell happened or you’re never going to step in this place ever again.”

Kuro gulped and surrendered. “He was so adorable, okay? Keith, I mean. When he saw the monkey he was talking shit and stuff I can’t remember and he wanted the thing, Takashi. HE WANTED IT. And if Keith wants it, HE’S GONNA GET IT. And I didn’t have the heart to stop him. So we got the monkey and then… somewhere along the way, when we looked back to check on the monkey in the car, it wasn’t there anymore.”

“Keith said you released it in the forest,” Shiro squinted. 

“There was no forest. We lost the most expensive monkey in the city, bro,” Kuro admitted with a sigh.

“YOU TRAITOR!!!” Someone shouted and the twins looked at their right and they saw Keith looking so angry. 

“Run,” Shiro softly said to Kuro, not leaving Keith’s eyes.

“Oh god,” Kuro gulped and then Keith began to charge at him. 

Shiro continued drinking his tea as he heard Kuro’s scream fading at a distance. Served him right for getting his husband drunk in the first place that one unfortunate night. 

A list of weird things I’ve overheard at my school

⁃ Headbanging to It’s a Hard Knock Life

⁃ Can I be a busker?

⁃ Do you think if we trained for it we could survive radiation?

⁃ hurry uP I WANT MY MACCAS

⁃ What sort of fancy fucktard

⁃ Do you ever just bite down and down and be like ‘JAW’

⁃ Slit your jeans, not your wrists

⁃ I woUlD WaLK fIve HUndREd MILes and I WouLD wAlK fIVe HuNdREd MOre

⁃ I hope I get lost

⁃ Ooooo noooo it’s monkeys 

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales  {Sentence Starters}

  • “Hand me your sword.“
  • “Right, that’s it. Kill ‘em all.“
  • “Everyone pays, eventually.“
  • “What a horrible way to live.“
  • “This basket is full of heads!“
  • “That is a blatant fabrication!“
  • “Nothing! You call this nothing?“
  • “Is this treasure worth dying for?“
  • “Why did I bother coming to you?“
  • “I’m currently wanted for treason.“
  • “Leave, now… before it’s too late.“
  • “The real question is, who are you?“
  • “But, now you come to me with fear…”
  • “I won’t stop. I want you to come home.“
  • “The price of crossing my door is blood.”
  • “You will soon pay for what you did to me.“
  • “Do you even have a ship, a crew… pants?“
  • “Maybe you should retire to the countryside.“
  • “A great pirate does not require such intricacies.“
  • “And if you throw me over, I’ll come straight back.“
  • “How dare you do exactly what I’d do if I were you?“
  • “The dead are hunting us down and you do nothing.“
  • “No, it can’t be. I’ve spent years searching for… this?”
  • “No shame in that, dear. We all have to make a living.“
  • “I want my compass, 216 barrels of rum, and a monkey.“
  • “I wish I could tell him, myself, but dead men tell no tales.“
  • “You would’ve seen a lot more if you kept your cakehole shut.“
  • “That’s why I’m here. I think I know a way to break your curse.“
  • “I’m so sorry. Were you still talking? I believe I nodded off a bit.“
  • “No need to fear me. I always leave one man alive… to tell the tale.”
  • “Here’s an idea, how about a good old-fashioned stoning? I’d kill to be stoned right now!”
  • “Do you know how long I’ve been waiting for this moment? The risks I’ve taken to be here?“