She was romantic,
Love was pouring
from her eyes
She was too beautiful for her
She was vivid with
and her body
a powerful thing.
She denied every culture,
and cried holy tears
She was terrifying.
When I would kiss her
it felt like God
created the world in her mouth.
I did not know
how to touch her.
She was a wet woman
I did not know how the
hell to love her.
She was too much
and I hated her for that.
She was too much,
and I loved her for it.
I just want you to know that sometimes you are going to have nights where you sit in your bed and you fucking cry and want to smash a window and scream because no one is on your side and shit is so fucked up and you just want to give up. Have your moment, run down the street, journal 5 pages and then go outside and throw it in a bonfire, kick the shit out of the tree in the back yard or go scream at the pool and tell it to go fuck itself. (Apologize after tho cause that fucking tree didn’t do shit to you; calm down bruh)
It’s okay to have a moment where everything is fucked up. Try your best not to take it out on others, don’t hurt yourself, express that frustration, that anger, that sadness in a healthy way.
Just don’t go off and kill yourself. You’d be shocked how much better you feel after screaming at a tree and getting yourself a good meal.
PLEASE LOVE YOUR TRANSGENDER & NON BINARY CHILDREN. THEY ARENT HURTING ANYONE. THEY ARE NORMAL AND THEY DESERVE YOUR LOVE. THATS ALL WE WANT.
I don’t care if they are 13, I don’t care if they are 30.
This is what transphobia looks like. This is what being 27 years old and your family is talking to you like a toddler and telling you “Sweetie, that’s just how the world is. We can’t change our minds. I’m sorry, we don’t love Kyle, we love Katie.”
I am strong. I will survive this. But this is what is killing children. This is what is killing adults. This is the ugly reality of things.
I went home for Christmas in the hopes I could show my family how good I was doing. Even after they told me I wasn’t allowed to come originally. I fought to be here. I had gained weight, me depression is better, my anxiety is gone, my smile was real.
But it was crushed. Every. Day. No one stuck up for me. Not even my siblings.
It’s not wrong to be transgender. You don’t need to be fixed! I don’t give a fuck if a book or some old dude tells you it’s wrong. I don’t care if your mom tells she doesn’t love you anymore and your dad hits you. It isn’t wrong. You are normal and you have to be strong and you have to live for you.
It is time to take control of your life. I don’t know what happens when we die. But I know it’s important that we live and show this world that we deserved love and respect and to be a part of a family.
Please be strong. Please choose to live because I am choosing to live and document this in the hope that one day it is going to get better and someone will find this and see even in the darkest hours we can pull through.