a little decorum

Moments In the Jedi Docu-Series That Win the Public’s Heart and Indirectly Save The Universe

  • Anakin constantly wiping out while showing off but then standing up after it and beaming like that was his plan all along
  • Obi-Wan getting caught in a slip-up he can’t gracefully get out of (“No no, I said, “I’d like to help you out of your [throat clears] stance” to Anakin, not, uh, “pants”, of course, I was helping him…correct his form. Sparring. [blinks] We’re Jedi.” [awkward pause] “OK well I think we’re done for today, right? I should go”)
  • Yoda admitting that Obi-Wan is his favorite kid on camera and then trying to claim he didn’t say it
  • Ahsoka and Rex laughing so hard retelling a story about Anakin getting stuck in a ship’s laundry chute that they both are crying [smash cut to Anakin saying “that entire story about the laundry chute is a lie”]
  • Mace Windu, finally breaking into a smile after months of filming and admitting that “Hell YES I love this job! I’m a fucking JEDI!” while wearing his own meme on a T-Shirt
  • Padme and Satine do a joint interview while at some political luncheon and it VERY quickly gets very funny because they are both hitting the white wine pretty hard 
  • Quinlan Vos: [being interviewed] Celibate? Kriff no, the Jedi aren’t celibate! [laughs hysterically] No. No no no. No. Like, I don’t even know who started that rumor? But like, not even a little bit. [more laughter] I mean, we get around, you know what I mean? I’ve been with plenty of people. Like, a lot. Dignitaries, senators, bounty hunters –
    Obi-Wan: [walking into the shot, whispering harshly] Quin, really, do you think you could conduct yourself with a little bit more decorum? Please?
    Quinlan: [waving him away] OK OK fine, Master Kenobi.
    [Obi-Wan walks out of the shot]
    Quinlan: [looks at the camera, exaggerated whisper] Him too.

have thenvunin getting a little drunk on the refreshments and uthvir getting a little drunk on him @feynites :3

anonymous asked:

more narukono?? u created this hell for me

Oh god, why not??

“Letter for you, Tsunade-sama,” Shizune says, practically waving the scroll in Tsunade’s face. She thinks that Tsunade doesn’t see her steal the sake bottle in the same motion, but Tsunade absolutely does. It’s clever enough that she allows her first student to get away with it, though, casting Shizune a droll look as she accepts the message.

“Shouldn’t you be with Anko right now?” she asks rather than commenting on the theft. “I thought you had a date. One of us should be getting laid, at the very least.”

One glance at the jagged handwriting on the paper is more than enough to distract her from her spluttering apprentice, though; her heart trips in her chest, and she can’t help the smile that spreads across her face, one hand coming up to touch the spot where her grandfather’s necklace used to hang.

“From Naruto?” Shizune asks, and she’s still very red, but she’s smiling fondly at Tsunade even so.

Now Tsunade is the one who wants to flush at the implications, but. Well. All of Konoha knows about her attachment to Naruto by now, and if some of the civilians still mutter about demons and better off if the beast was dead in her hearing, they learn quickly enough.

“Yes,” she confirms, sliding a nail under the wax seal to break it. “Jiraiya mentioned they were headed towards the Ame border next—“

“What?” Shizune blinks, checks her clipboard—flashing the sake bottle she has stuffed up one sleeve, not that Tsunade is going to mention that—and says with a confused frown, “A hawk brought this from Kumogakure.”

A bad feeling slides down Tsunade’s spine like ice. “Kumo,” she repeats, already pulling the scroll open with a little more haste than necessary as she tries not to rip it. The inside is covered in Naruto’s unmistakable handwriting, but before she can catch any words a photograph flutters down to land on her desk.

Somewhere between horror and resignation, Tsunade picks it up.

It’s Naruto, and her first thought is that he looks happy. Certainly happier than she’s ever seen him, though she had admittedly only known him for a few weeks before he left with Jiraiya. His smile is wide and bright and more settled than before, like he’s been happy for a while and has adjusted to it, and his hair is longer, shaggy and bright around his ears.

He’s also sprawled across the lap of an older boy, who looks about twenty, at ease there and flashing the camera a victory sign as he grins.

Tsunade’s eyes narrow. One of the older boy’s hands is a curled around Naruto’s hip a little too far for decorum, and there’s a flush on his face as he smiles a touch sheepishly. He looks happy too, though, and dark blue eyes are resting on Naruto, full of a warmth that makes Tsunade’s chest ache just a little with memory.

It absolutely doesn’t mean that she isn’t going to hunt this young man down and just…make sure that he knows exactly how precious Naruto is to her.

“Naruto’s growing up,” Shizune says warmly, peering over Tsunade’s shoulder to see the photo. “He looks good.”

He does. Unexpected beau aside, he’s suntanned and wearing new clothes, some of the baby fat gone from his face, with the lines of muscles where before he wasn’t old enough to develop them. Tsunade hums in agreement, turning her attention to the actual letter, and lets Shizune take the photo.

A bare handful of sentences in and she can feel her blood pressure skyrocketing.

“Shizune,” she says, and only keeps it even by saying it through gritted teeth, “get Jiraiya back here immediately!”

“Y—yes, Tsunade-sama, right away!” Shizune scrambles to grab up her things and bolt for the door, clearly recognizing the danger in that tone.

“Wait,” Tsunade says, an instant before the door closes. Shizune pauses, peering back, and Tsunade gives her a smile that’s on the edge of vicious. “Don’t even imply that I’m angry. I don’t want him to see the first punch coming.”

Shizune’s eyes widen, and she casts a startled glance at the letter Tsunade is holding. “Of course, Tsunade-sama,” she agrees, and closes the door behind her carefully.

With a low grown, Tsunade slumps back in her chair and levels a narrow glare at the message. “Boyfriend,” she scoffs. “Jinchuuriki training. Ha. Heading to Suna for the Chuunin Exams. Gods damn it, that idiot pervert has a hell of a lot to answer for.”

Miles away, entertaining himself searching for rumors in a bar near the Wind Country border, Jiraiya sneezes, and wonders why it feels as if someone just walked over his grave.

This Is My Idea

Long before they met
Derek and Odette
Were destined to be wedded
However anyone could see
The only point on which they didn’t disagree
Was that the very thought of summertime was dreaded

When Prince Lotor first saw her, he was livid. When he was older, he would conclude that his reasons for being furious with her were absurd. However, at age seven, he considered his anger to be completely acceptable.

Princess Allura stood taller than him, with her hands propped on her hips and her eyes narrowed on him with suspicion. The way her lips pursed in that critical way made his blood boil.

He shouldn’t have been shorter than her. He knew Allura was nearly a year older than him, but he should still be the one looking down on her. The Garla towered over Altean’s, yet this young princess stood above him with an unimpressed sneer.

Lotor wanted to turn to his father and demand that he send King Alfor and his daughter back to their planet. However, the way his father shoved him towards the princess suggested there was no room for debate. Lotor really despised this betrothal.

The prince gnashed his teeth as he bent into a low bow before the princess. “Pleasure to meet you Princess Allura,” Lotor grumbled. His voice was hostile despite his father’s urgings that he needed to be charming. “I’m so happy that you’ll be staying here for the summer.”

Allura’s tone was pleasant when she finally spoke and, despite her young age, her voice was clear as a bell. “I’m happy to be here, Prince Lotor,” she replied while falling into a curtsy. She maintained the grace of a dancer, even though Lotor had been sneering at her through his teeth. His animosity didn’t seem to phase her. “I hear this season is quite lovely on your planet.”

Lotor didn’t say anything as he stepped back, and looked into her eyes for a moment. The colour was odd. Like a sea filled with pink stars. He immediately glared at the ground and crossed his arms in front of his chest. He felt his cheeks grow warm, but he was sure it was due to embarrassment and rage.

There was a few diplomatic and friendly words exchanged between Alfor and Zarkon before the Emperor suggested he and his daughter go rest after their long journey. The servants led Allura away to her chambers and she didn’t so much as glance back at Lotor. Though, it wasn’t as if that bothered him.

When the king and the princess left the room, his father hit him upside the head for his rudeness. Lotor winced but didn’t say a word as his father gave him a sound lecture.

This was going to be a long summer.


Allura was astounded by how immature Prince Lotor could be. She knew he was a spoiled brat, but she had expected a prince to conduct himself with a little decorum.

Allura knew her father was insistent on this match between her and Zarkons’s son. For his sake, she bared the annoyance of Lotor throughout each summer she spent with him. Even though he frustrated her to no end.

However, during the summer when she was ten, Lotor adopted the habit of playing pranks. They weren’t even clever pranks. He would throw rotted fruit at her when he thought she couldn’t see him, and step on the skirt of her dress so she would trip as she walked by him.

As the time rolled by and Lotor hadn’t tired of his childish games, Allura decided to throw away etiquette and teach the boy a lesson. She wasn’t going to let him treat her like this. She wasn’t going to get pushed around without pushing back.

So the next time Lotor stepped down on her skirt, causing her to stumble, she turned around and socked him in the face.

The action took Lotor by surprise, but after regaining his senses he shoved her as hard as he could. Allura shoved him right back.

The tussle quickly escalated to the point where they were both rolling on the floor, fighting each other, tooth and nail. Not once did Allura relent or become overwhelmed by him. When he kicked, she clawed. When he hit, she punched.

Eventually, it was their respective fathers who had to split them up. Zarkon gripped Lotor’s wrist and forced the prince to release the hold he had on the princess’ hair. Meanwhile, Allura’s father struggled to make her stop biting Lotor’s arm.

As their emperor and the foreign king tore the two children away from each other, the Garla soldiers looked at the scene with a mixture of shock and amusement.

When Alfor managed to get his daughter away from Lotor, it didn’t take much to make the princess listen to him. The disappointment in her father’s eyes was enough to make Allura regret her rash actions. She shouldn’t have let herself get riled up by simple teasing and pranks.

As her father continued to scold her, Allura looked over towards Lotor. Zarkon was yelling at the young prince, vehemently admonishing him for attacking a princess. Lotor’s shoulders were hunched and he stared at the ground dejectedly.

But when he looked up and met her gaze, the corners of his lips curled into a smile. There was no arrogance nor viciousness in that smile. It seemed to stem from genuine mirth and joy. She had never seen him grin like that before. He seemed to be about ready to burst out laughing, even as his father continued to rant on his behaviour.

Allura wasn’t really sure why, but she smiled back.


Lotor was thirteen when he realized that he actually liked Allura. It took him ages to admit it to himself. During that summer, they had spent more time together than they ever had before, and things were very different between them. For one, Lotor found himself actually wanting to spend time with her.

There were occasions during his childhood, when he would allow her to play with him due to boredom and loneliness. During these times, as well as before and after them, Lotor and Allura would continuously snip at each other. However, as they ran through the palace halls together and played games of make-believe in the throne room, a familiarity and companionship grew. The barbs and insults exchanged in their youth somehow shifted to light teasing and playful banter. Lotor wasn’t sure when that shift happened, but when he finally noticed it he knew he was in trouble.

Once the realization was made, Lotor did his best to hide his fondness and push whatever feelings he had deep down. Though, he couldn’t help making the extra effort to try and make her feel welcome. She was much more fun to be around when she had the chance to enjoy herself.

Lotor took Allura to the greatest sights of his kingdom, exploring deep underground caves filled with lost histories and swimming in a bay of shimmering water that nearly matched the beauty of her eyes. He tried to convince himself that he wasn’t trying to impress her. Even as he swelled with pride upon seeing the wonder in her eyes when he brought her to a new place.

When the summer’s end came around all too quickly, Lotor felt his heart clenching at the thought of not seeing or even hearing from Allura until the next summer. So, before she left, he mustered up the courage to walk up to her and take her wrist.

Allura stopped in her tracks when he touched her. Her lovely eyes were wide and startled when she turned back to face him. Lotor struggled to breathe for a moment, but he managed to get the words out.

“I will write to you,” he said, and he hated how breathless and weak he sounded. “I hope you will respond.”

The smile that lit her face could have obliterated mountains. It certainly did a number on him. He committed the way her eyes sparkled like stars to his memory. How could one person be so enchanting every single time they smiled?

“I will, Lotor,” she whispered, as if she were telling him a secret. “I definitely will.”


Allura was fifteen when Lotor had kissed her for the first time. They had been spending more and more time together. No longer for just the adventures Lotor would take her on, but for perfectly mundane things as well. They would eat together in the garden, discussing the politics and the philosophers of their respective cultures. They would read together in the library, sitting in a comfortable and warm silence, only occasionally broken when Allura would stop to tell him an exciting new development in the story she read.

The kiss happened on a beautiful night, when she was sure she could see all the stars of the galaxy. The prince and princess were sitting on a flat part of the palace roof, with some of the servants scrambling to find them down bellow. Lotor was lying back, his arms crossed behind his head as he gazed up at the sky. Allura was sitting up, having not nearly enough confidence to lay back in the relaxed way that Lotor was. She had to crane her neck in order to look up at the universe presented to them.

There was another call of their names and Allura was sure she could hear Coran fretting about her whereabouts. Lotor chuckled when he heard the panic that he caused when he whisked an Altean princess away.

“You should have told someone we were going up here,” Allura chided him, lightly nudging his leg with her foot. That action nearly caused her to loose her balance.

“Where’s the fun in that,” he countered, shooting her a mischievous grin.

Allura could only roll her eyes at his careless attitude, though she couldn’t help but laugh at the way Coran’s voice cracked when he called out her name. She supposed she was no better than he was.

“We’re going to give someone a heart attack,” she sighed, feeling ashamed of how they were worrying everyone.

“Don’t worry,” Lotor assured her, his gaze not once drifting from the stars. “I go up here all the time. My servants and guards are used to my disappearances.”

Allura only hummed in response and glanced up at the sky once again. She was glad Lotor had suggested this. It was such a clear night, with no clouds or pollution from the lights of Daibazaal. It was as if they were out in space. She gasped in excitement when a particularly bright and beautiful shooting star soared over her.


She turned to find Lotor sitting up beside her, staring at her with an unreadable expression. He shifted uncomfortably, and could only meet her eyes for brief periods before his gaze would flicker back to the sky or to his hands.

She leaned in close, concerned about his sudden insecurity. Usually he was so confident around her, a sharpened half grin always on display. Especially before doing an especially dangerous stunt, like diving into the bay from the cliffside. This change in behaviour threw her for a loop.

“Are you alright?” she asked, trying to get him to look up at her.

Lotor didn’t respond with words. He simply leaned forward, closing the small distance between them, and gently pressing his lips against hers. His lips were soft and his skin was worn. Nothing could have stopped Allura from melting.

It was as if a damn had broken open within her. All the emotions and fluttering heartbeats that she had pushed aside whenever Lotor smiled or laughed or ran his fingers through his hair, rushed through her like a river.

She was shaking when he pulled away in order to breathe. His hands enveloped her trembling ones, his thumbs lightly caressing her skin. Lotor leaned his forehead against her own and they both tried to calm their pounding hearts.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered and his violet skin flushed to a rosy pink. “I’ve just…wanted to do that for a while.”

“Well,” she sighed, quickly regaining her composure. A smirk played at her lips and laughter bubbled up when she spoke again. “It took you long enough.”

Lotor blinked, stunned into silence by her statement, before leaning in to kiss her again.

Allura had thought her father would be more pleased to find the seeds of romance being planted between herself and Lotor. But when she told him of her closeness with Lotor, his face was grim. He told her that this was the last summer they would be spending in Daibazaal.

Both Lotor and Allura were shocked and devastated to find out about the sudden end to their betrothal. Neither of them understood why tensions were suddenly rising between their fathers.

They agreed to continue sending letters, and visit one another when either of them had the opportunity. Even with the end of their engagement, they weren’t ready to shove their newfound relationship aside after ignoring their own feelings for so long.

So they continued their engagement, only in secret. But the optimism of their young love was no match for the shadows of things to come.


Kay, so I’m sorry that this is a thing now but lol I’m not actually sorry. Calling this my Lollura musical series. Or something, I’ll work on the title. There’s only going to be four parts and I got them planned out. Might throw in requests later.

The song for this chapter was This Is My Idea from the Swan Princess. Sums up their relationship I thought they would have kinda well.

This series is going to be kinda AU with the whole Allura and Lotor grew up at the same time. I’m gonna have Hagar be the one to keep Lotor alive for these ten thousand years the same way she did with her cat. Or something.

Part 2: http://deadlyflames.tumblr.com/post/165215532378/burn

Part 3: http://deadlyflames.tumblr.com/post/165565885093/think-of-me

Hope y'all enjoy

anonymous asked:

so, what are your thoughts on the "evil sam holt" theory that's going around?

In general the Garrison doesn’t seem malicious the way the theory needs- I don’t even agree the Garrison seems “shady”. They may know slightly more than they tell the public but that’s because a government space program is generally expected to conduct themselves with a little more decorum than every time something they can’t explain happens, running out to the public yelling “the sky is falling!”

Like- at this point the Garrison has a huge amount of loose threads they have no real way to test, prove, or talk about, which means that, much rather than lying through they’re teeth, what they’re doing is avoiding turning what they see as the tragic loss of three astronauts into tabloid headline bait.

That’s also not how the empire operates at all. If the Garrison had pulled a Lubos, we would see the Garrison in Lubos’s situation- obviously surrounded and held hostage by the empire. There’s also no way they’d continue with the space program- that’s something the empire would shut down right away because training people to operate spaceships, fly, and potentially fight are counter-intuitive to keeping Earth under control. Again, I think about Coran’s line of “if the galra were on Earth, you would know.”

Keith still makes sense, because, he’s not with the main empire- he and the people who put him there were affiliated with rebels. If the Garrison knows anything, I guess it’s vaguely possible they know stuff because of the Blade, but honestly, that does not suggest they’d be bopping around the solar system unarmed, or have anywhere approaching that reverence for “what could be out there?” if they already know.

In generaln general suggesting the Garrison is rotten, to me, fails to acknowledge how much of an investment the Kerberos mission must have been- if it’s basically just a bluff to pretend they don’t already know about life on other planets that is way, way too expensive and useless of a bluff, comparable to “the moon landing was faked but the person hired was such a perfectionist that they filmed it on the moon”

But let’s get into Sam Holt specifically.

I went into detail trying to analyze Sam Holt’s personality from what we’ve seen, and, I feel like people sort of latched onto him after it turned out Matt seems to be okay, that he’s no longer with the empire. Like I saw a particular brand of fanart of “mind-controlled gladiator Matt Holt” very frequently, but after that revelation most of it seems to have re-gifted itself to Sam.

The empire really doesn’t seem to stock in brainwashing or mind control like we expect- they definitely mess with people’s heads but it seems to be the old-fashioned non-magical way.

With Sam, I don’t think there’s anything he’s done at this point that really lends itself to the suggestion he’s a malicious or untrustworthy person. Especially because Pidge quotes him as someone who emphasizes that a team is like a family and considering how incredibly close the Holts are- how much of a driving motivation and preoccupying thought family and home are to both Pidge and Matt- that tells us that Sam possibly even more than Shiro is someone who wants to take care of his team.

I feel like the closest that could come is that it’s possible Sam could make a somewhat underhanded decision with the goal of protecting Shiro, Matt, or Pidge, but at the same time, considering people trying to bargain with the galra has never ended well (Lubos, and before him, Rolo’s gang) I feel like Sam’s too smart to be suckered that way and it’s not clear what he’d have to bargain with that the empire couldn’t just try to take from him by force.

It feels… people really want the drama of someone having to Fight Someone You Know, or, ahh, what if Earth was already captured without them knowing it, but aren’t really paying attention to the characters of the people involved.

Fool Me Once (Bucky x Steve x Reader)

Originally posted by wanximoff



A/N: 1940S!BUCKY ANGST, I HEAR YOU CRY! Your wish is my command. I warn you now, this will do things to your feelings and I’m not even sorry. Thank you to the two the anon and @minervaem who requested this one!

Keep reading

fightmefool  asked:

I desperately need some ShrinkyClinks mpreg and Steve's hormones are all over the place so Bucky constantly be with his omega so he can swoop in and calm Steve down before he freaks out over the tiniest things.

Steve is always a fire-cracker. Always has been and always will be. Bucky isn’t sure how Steve even has the patience to put up with him most days, but he’s not complaining. 

Since Steve had spent so much of his childhood sick, he’d always been taken care of, by nurses, or his mother, and he hated it. He made a point to tell Bucky off every time he tried to help Steve with anything, which was stupid, and annoying as hell, but didn’t stop Bucky from trying. 

Once Steve got pregnant however, much to both of their surprise and excitement, he’d been a wreck. For once he wasn’t sick, didn’t even had morning sickness, but his hormones ran the gambit every hour of the day, leaving him strung out and exhausted to the point of tears. 

Bucky tried to be supportive, and it was a testament to how bad Steve was feeling that he didn’t always push Bucky away, but Steve’s already short fuze had gotten increasingly shorter and shorter as his pregnancy progressed. Now Bucky had to stick close to his omega to stop him from losing it over even the smallest thing. He knew Steve was frustrated with himself, for getting so emotional over nothing, but Bucky didn’t mind. It was just something they did now. 

“God damnitt Buck, I can’t even reach the top of the fridge, I just-” 

There it was, the hitch in Steve’s breath that meant he was going to start yelling or crying, and Bucky didn’t want to hear either of those things, though from his defeated expression Bucky assumed the latter. 

“Don’t worry Stevie, I can get it for you.” Bucky walked over, pressing a kiss to the top of Steve’s head, reaching past him to get the bowl that Steve couldn’t quite reach. 

“Have I always been this useless?” Steve looked up at him with big eyes, his hands actually shaking. Bucky immediately pulled him close, leading him over to the couch and bundling them together. 

“Don’t say that, you’ve never been useless.” 

Steve was scrubbing at his face, frustrated that he was once again unable to stop the tears. “I feel right useless right now. Even more than I did before…” 

Bucky gave him a gentle squeeze. “You want to go to lunch? The place down the street that has the great burgers?” 

Steve knew he was being placated, but he was too tired to argue about it for once, and just nodded. 

Bucky almost immediately regretted lunch. Steve was already fried, he should have known better than to take him out into public. He would never be embarrassed about his mate, and while watching Steve spit angry words at big-headed alphas would always be funny, sometimes he just wanted to sit through lunch. 

It was fine until some guy tried to bully the waitress into a free drink, all it took was one look at Steve and Bucky knew he was probably going to get thrown out of here. Shame, they had such good food. 

“Hey pal, why don’t you just let the lady do her job. It’s not her fault you’re an idiot.” Steve hissed, looking like he wanted to stab the man in the eye with his straw. 

The guy took one look at Steve and went back to heckling the waitress, but not before Bucky heard him mutter something nasty under his breath. 

“Wanna run that by me again? I didn’t quite hear you.” Steve pulled himself out of the booth, his hands balled into fists. 

The man’s eyes slid off Steve and landed on Bucky. “Why don’t you control your omega, pal?” 

Bucky didn’t even have time to open his mouth before Steve leapt at the guy. Usually Steve showed a little more decorum, but obviously the guy had struck a nerve. 

Shoving fries in his mouth Bucky pulled himself up as well, slapping down a $20 on their table and grabbing Steve with his flesh arm, pulling him away from where he was trying to get a solid hit on the guy, and laying the big alpha out with a punch of his own. The guy flopped to the ground like a dead fish, and didn’t move. Getting a face-full of metal fist usually did that to people. 

“We’re really sorry about the ruckus, we’ll get out of your hair.” Bucky mumbled, holding Steve close to his body as the tiny omega continued to snarl at the man on the floor. 

Once back at their apartment Bucky closed the door carefully and turned to see a very cowed-looking Steve standing in the middle of the floor. “Buck…” 

“Jesus Steve, I feel like I need to print out business cards that say “Sorry, he’s pregnant,” to hand out to the public every time we go out.” Bucky actually put his hands on his hips, leveling a look at his mate. 

Steve picked at his sleeve. “I was going to apologize, I don’t mean to be so unreasonable…” 

Bucky gathered him up in a kiss. “Just try okay? I don’t want to get kicked out of every good restaurant between here and Queens.” 

“I can’t make any promises.” Steve nuzzled into his neck and Bucky pulled a blanket over them. “Only three more months, right?” 

Bucky gave his mate a squeeze. “Yeah, three more.” He hoped they both survived that long. 

I love pre-serum Steve with all my heart, as angry and argumentative as he is. - Astro

@no-atmosphere suggested: “Something with Todhunter and Rimmer? It doesn’t have to be smut (it would be appreciated though…), maybe Todhunter trying to soothe Rimmer after the whole Gazpacho Soup incident?”

(If you listen carefully, you can hear the distant evil cackling of @allsortsofsmeg @janamelie and the other Todster shippers. *sigh* I’m guessing there’s some sort of inititiation ritual I have to perform?)


Todhunter leant against the supply cupboard doorway with a sigh and knocked patiently.

“Smeg off,” came the snapped yet shaking reply.

“Arnold, I am your superior officer,” he reminded gently. “A little more decorum please?”

There was a considered pause. “Smeg off, SIR.”

Todhunter snorted warmly. That would do. “I’m going to come in now, okay?” He palmed open the door and stepped inside to join him. As the man hurriedly swiped at his eyes and scowled back, Todhunter rolled his eyes. “It’s not that big a deal, you know?”

“They were all laughing at me!” Rimmer protested. He leant back against the wall with a sigh. “Who am I kidding? I shouldn’t have been there anyway.”

“Well that’s a tad rude, Arnold,” Todhunter reprimanded softly before turning to face him. “Seeing as I’m the one who requested that you were invited.”

Rimmer blinked twice. “You - ? Me - ? Why?” he spluttered.

Fixing him with a solicitous smirk, Todhunter edged towards him. “Isn’t it obvious?”

The door had barely closed before there was a clatter of brooms and boxes that soon dissolved into elicit gasps and moans.

Four months later, Rimmer glared at the same supply cupboard door where Todhunter and Dave Lister, his new bunkmate, stood chatting flirtatiously. After a suggestive whisper in the shorter man’s ear, the pair chuckled wickedly and disappeared inside.

Rimmer squirmed against his now obvious erection with a scowl. That was the precise moment when he decided that he hated them both.


❝Can’t you think about someone other than yourself?❞
❝Do women go for this sort of thing?❞
❝Hundreds have died in my wake. You’re just a number to me.❞
❝It’s like she’s forgotten you exist above the waist.❞
❝To be fair, there’s quite a bit of me below the waist…❞
❝Is a little decorum too much to ask for?!❞
❝No one touches my junk and lives!❞
❝But now it’s getting late. I think I might… turn in early.❞
❝You know I enjoy your company. But…❞
❝Ah, the games you play. Listen, I want to spend the night with you. There. I said it.❞
❝Don’t worry, you’ll get to see a sword up close real soon!❞
❝You’re nicer than everybody here…Thank you for helping me!❞
❝By the ancestors, WHAT A WONDERFUL GIFT!❞
❝I can’t let you do this, it’s insane!❞
❝No, no, no. No leading. Bad things happen when I lead.❞
❝By the tits of my ancestors!❞
❝Is that death you’re wearing? It really suits you!❞
❝Does anyone else feel the urge to vomit? No? ‘Tis just me?❞
❝So are you going to continue staring at me as if I am covered in eels?❞
❝And people actually voluntarily attack you? Are they just stupid?❞
❝I fight with quickness and wit, rather than with brute force and strength.❞
❝A man is made by the quality of his enemies.❞
❝Start talking. You’ve only seconds to live.❞
❝It seems you have made something of yourself after all.❞
❝How about you leave and I don’t destroy you?❞
❝Your skills are impressive, but you are one man.❞
❝Shall we have two guests for the evening, or none?❞
❝Falling on your blade in grief seemed like too much trouble, I take it?❞
❝You stole cookies from a child?!❞
❝No…ugh… I’m going to have nightmares after this.❞
❝Magic can kill. Knives can kill. Even small children launched at great speed could kill.❞
❝Yes, that’s right, I stopped you to tell you I’m an idiot….❞
❝No offense, but might I give it a try? I do have quick hands, after all.❞
❝You deserve a more worldly man… Someone like myself.❞
❝I was just sampling the goods. No harm done.❞
❝I hope you like heroes, my lady, because your husband died like one.❞
❝So you’re the one who butchered my kin?❞
❝Oh look, someone owns a talking ass.❞
❝If one more servant asks if I would like a change of clothes, I will set the house on fire.❞
❝You can perform on the condition that you keep your pants on. That’s non-negotiable.❞
❝I’m afraid we can’t leave the fate of all the world up to your dog.❞
❝Anyone with a leftover ham could buy your allegiance.❞
❝You’d rather make love to a desiccated corpse than me?❞
❝Your wildest dreams come true: sex with ____!❞
❝Gotta go babe, saving the world and all that crap.❞
❝We’re under attack. We’ve been fighting for our lives!❞
❝So, you never did tell me how you passed your time in that cage.❞
❝Andraste’s flaming sword! I know where babies come from!❞
❝Watch as I thrash our enemies with the mighty power of floral arrangements!❞
❝You are a true warrior, and worthy of respect.❞
❝I want you to know that while I may not always prove…worthy…of your friendship, I will always value it.❞
❝Together we will make our stand. Together we will save this world.❞
❝Don’t I have enough armed lunatics following me around already?❞
❝You’d be surprised how many of my closest friends have tried to kill me at some point.❞
❝I swear, I’m the bravest one here and I’m a woman.❞
❝Some days I have trouble figuring out which boot goes on which foot.❞
❝I remember it didn’t take much to make you sing…❞
❝We all do our share of murdering around here, don’t we?❞

anonymous asked:

petopher and sterek in a double date where werewolves exist and everyone knows and angry almost wolfed out kind of jealous derek and very smug peter and smh but fond Chris with just Stiles.

Author’s Note: Thanks, Anon, for such a fun prompt!


“Quit flirting with my mate,” Derek growled at Peter, his eyes flashing a brilliant blue.

Peter chuckled, more amused than anything else. There was nothing about Derek’s werewolf that threatened Peter’s position in the pack. While he enjoyed flirting and teasing Stiles, he didn’t actually desire the young man, which Derek knew intellectually, but everything felt like an infringement during a long courtship. There was a quality about Stiles that Peter wanted in his playmates, but in this case, Peter was all bark and no bite. He wouldn’t dare; he knew how strong the bond was between his nephew and the human. But he clearly enjoyed riling his nephew every chance he had, it was fun to see Derek flash his Beta eyes and show his fangs.

“He’s not your mate yet; he’s your Intended. And we all know that an engagement during this phase of the courtship is…flexible.”

“How can you make that sound dirty? I mean, how is that even possible?” Stiles complained, shaking his head.

“It’s a gift,” Peter said, smiling.

“It’s a curse,” Chris said, raising his eyebrow.

“I’m sure that Stiles will be quite flexible—“

Derek growled, the tone rising in his jealousy, and he leaned aggressively across the table towards Peter but stopped when Chris’s hand tapped the table in warning. For a moment, Peter wondered if Derek would have actually tried to rip his claws into Peter’s throat.  

“A little decorum, please,” Chris said, softly.

“Yes, nephew—“

“You, too, Peter. I would like for us to not be banned from another restaurant.”

He gave Peter a dirty look and Peter returned one that was all innocence.

Derek smirked, sitting back in his chair as Peter rolled his eyes slowly.

“Why are we even doing this? This is so stupid,” Stiles said, crossing his arms and leaning back in his chair. He tugged at his collar, pulling down the knot of his tie. Peter frowned at him and Stiles stopped, letting out an exasperated sigh.

“We promised your father that we would chaperone the two of you until your 18th birthday,” Chris said, evenly. He gave Derek a warning look, blue eyes narrowing in his handsome face.

Stiles smirked, waving his hand at Peter. “I think he’s the one that needs a chaperone more than the two of us. Besides, Derek and I have decided to wait until the first full moon after I turn 18.”

Peter regarded them thoughtfully. “That will make Derek’s claim even stronger.”

He could imagine only too well how passionate and uninhibited a first time full moon mating and claiming could go. After all, when he and Chris finally came together, they had decided to wait for the full moon, too. Neither of them was young anymore and it wasn’t their first time by any measure of the word, but the instinct to have and to take and to give was exponentially powerful. Peter remembered howling and chasing Chris through the Preserves; and Chris was so clever and so good that night, leading Peter on a long chase until Peter caught him.

Chris must’ve been thinking about the same thing. “You’re in for a very long night.”

Peter winked at his mate.

Stiles blushed slightly as he turned to grin shyly at Derek.

“We know,” Derek said, haughtily. He smirked at Peter and placed his hand behind Stiles’s neck, caressing him gently.

Hmmmmm…that’s nice,” Stiles murmured, closing his eyes as he tilted his head for Derek, offering his neck in submission.

Peter let out a loud, exaggerated sigh. He turned to Chris with a small pout. “Why don’t you do that to me anymore? Have we lost our romance?”

“Awwww…sucks to be you,” Stiles said, laughing at Peter.

Chris placed his hand on Peter’s thigh, squeezing the thick muscle. Peter bit back a groan and smiled at his mate, eyes dropping to Chris’s mouth. Maybe he could lure his mate into the restroom for—

“Absolutely not,” Chris said, chuckling throatily.

“No?” Peter teased, grinning.

“Later,” he whispered, brushing the tip of his nose against Peter’s ear. “If you’re a good boy.”

Peter gave a smug look to Derek and Stiles, who wore matching expressions of horror.

“Gross,” Stiles muttered, shaking his head. “Can you keep your weird kinky sex life to yourselves?”

“Jealous?” Peter said, chuckling.

Derek growled again and Stiles turned away, but not before Peter caught the look of envy and repressed longing flick across Stiles’s face before he carefully hid it from Derek. He realized that it was Derek who had asked Stiles to wait; that if given the choice, Stiles would welcome Derek to his bed at any time. He’d probably do it in front of an audience if Derek said yes. Peter felt a moment of compassion for the human; as a teenager, his hormones were already running havoc through his body, but to be paired with a strong and virile Beta like Derek, there was no doubt that Stiles felt arousal and desire and aggression on a whole different level. He admired the young man for his control.

“Do we really have to double date with them?” Stiles asked Derek. “Your uncle creeps me out.”

“It’s okay, he creeps me out, too. You get used to it.”

Chris snickered, trying to hide it with a polite cough. Peter narrowed his eyes at his mate. He would make Chris pay for that later. Oh yes he would; he would pay a handsome price for that.

“But if we want to go on dates together? Yes. He’s my nearest family member and my Alpha,” Derek said, grimacing at Peter. “He’s not chaperoning us because of you, it’s because of me.”

“It’s our tradition,” Peter said, simply. “Derek is my heir; if his mother was still alive, you’d have to attend all of your dates with both of his parents. And Talia was a bit of a mother hen when it came to her favorite son.”

“She loved me, though, right from the start,” Chris said, fondly.

Peter rolled his eyes. “She loved you more than she loved me so what else is new?”

Chris laughed, taking Peter’s hand and kissing it. “She was ecstatic that you finally settled down.”

“And with an Argent hunter no less,” he said, rolling his eyes.

“No less,” Chris said, smiling into his eyes.

Stiles made gagging noises as Derek scowled at them.

“I think you’re right, they do need chaperones,” Derek said to Stiles.

Peter laughed, leaning over to Chris and giving him a chaste kiss on the lips. 


AR in Family Limitation

“I have a crystal ball, Charlie. You know that.”

Kristanna Past Lives AU: Chapter 9

Set in the Regency Era

Written by @karis-the-fangirl, Art by @upthenorthmountain 

Author’s Note: I’m afraid this story is a bit silly, because while I adore Jane Austen, it’s so much easier to imitate the work of Georgette Heyer (other Heyer fans can probably guess from this story, my favorite Heyer is The Grand Sophy).

Rated K+

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There’s a banter between Isabela and Sebastian where she asks about the appeal of being at the Maker’s side and such. She says something like “why don’t they promise something fun like a lake of wine and a bunch of virgins?”

And I like to imagine at some other time, a similar point comes up and Sebastian kind of…breaks a little decorum, maybe after he’s decided he’s not staying in the Chantry. And he says something like, “I never understood the fixation with virgins. Why do people always ask for that? If you want to ask the Maker for outlandish things, why not partners who would know exactly what you wanted?”

And Isabela snorts/flusters a bit because she was not expecting an actual retort and damn that’s a good point.

…Actually I think Bull and Blackwall have a semi-similar conversation where Bull brings up virgins. And again I like to think Blackwall would make a similar aside, to which Rota would approve of.   

makemeamilkshake  asked:

Caroline and Klaus are having an affair together

What About Them

It’s just dinner, she told herself.

“You know,” Stefan started, squeezing her hand a little. “Damon said this wouldn’t go well.”

She could feel Klaus’ eyes on her, but she concentrated on the meal that had just been set in front of her.

Of course Stefan had enthusiastically agreed when Klaus suggested they stay at his mansion while they were on vacation in New Orleans. It had been Stefan’s idea to come here, after all; Stefan’s continued assurance that Klaus would be fine with them together.

She still didn’t entirely believe it, but the blonde sitting diagonally across from her was doing a good job of convincing her.

They’d both moved on.

“Yes, well,” Klaus said, smiling a little, “Damon has very little sense of decorum. We’re more than capable of civility. Aren’t we, love?”

Every word he said seemed to have a double meaning attached to it when he shot a look at her and she resolved not to meet his eyes anymore.

She didn’t even pay attention to the conversation anymore, ignoring Stefan’s worried gaze, until her head popped up as Klaus said something.

“Yes, Cami is very talented with her tongue.”

The blonde blushed and Caroline’s nails fisted in her palms, almost drawing blood when Klaus met her eyes and smirked smugly.

“Who’s up for a walk around the Quarter after dinner?”

“This is stupid.”

“Are you that afraid to be alone with me?” he asked smugly.

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anonymous asked:

Can I have the S buoys react to a lover who is always worrying about if she's being annoying, please? Love you Lulu~

((O////O Love ya too dear anon, the flirty sign makes me shy, don’t ask xD))

Shu - *snorts softly at you, pulling you in for a cuddle* “Hn… you are troublesome… but…” *soft pause and you wait for the worse* “I don’t mind it. Now go to sleep.”

Reiji - *frowns* “Certainly you are being quite foolish with your fear of irking me that you have succeeded the very thing you were attempting to avoid.” *pushes his glasses up in that snide way* “Insecurity is not attractive on a woman such as yourself. I prefer my lovers to have a little more decorum.”

Ayato - *growls in an irritable manner* “Stop pushing me away pancakes, you’ve got no right to deny Ore-sama your blood-!” *blinks as you yell out that you are afraid you are annoying him* *first it is a faint chuckle before goes into full blown laughter* “P-pancakes, where did ya get a stupid idea like that? Baka. Just stick your neck out and submit to my fangs.”

Laito - *chuckles* “Bitch-chan~ The only thing that is annoying me right now is the pressure on…” *grips your hand down there to give you an idea* “Fufu, the way your cheeks flush is so cute… Oh, eager~? Your fingers are already unbuttoning me bitch-chan, have you finally given in to your desires~?”

Kanato - *frowns* “For a while now, you’ve been staring at me, fiddling with your fingers. You are a really rude person.” *his grip tightens on his teddy* “Don’t apologize when you shouldn’t have done it from the start. Ne, you have annoyed me with your prattling, maybe it’s best if I quiet you.” *presses a kiss to your lips*

Subaru - *blushes a bit irritably and look at you* “H-hah? Asking such a shitty question, tch.” *pins you* “Baka, maybe I should pleasure you until you cannot even think of such stupid things.” *smirks* “Heh, that blush suits you better.”

Kino - *raises his eyebrow* “Eh, of course you are, the most pleasant kind of annoyance darling~ Now.” *pushes you* “Get away from the TV, you aren’t made of glass.”

Brave Sentence Meme
  • "No weapons on the table."
  • "A will-of-the-wisp! They are real!"
  • "A wisp? You know, they, the will of the wisps, lead you to your fate."
  • "Your father doesn't believe in magic."
  • "Some say our destiny is tied to the land, as much a part of us as we are of it."
  • "They get away with murder. I never get away with anything."
  • "I'm the princess. I'm the example. I've got duties, responsibilities, expectations."
  • "This is all for naught."
  • "A princess must be knowledgeable about her kingdom."
  • "No lessons, no expectations. A day when anything can happen. A day I can change my fate."
  • "A princess does not place her weapons on the table."
  • "A princess should not have weaponry, in my opinion."
  • "Fire Falls? They say only the ancient kings were brave enough to drink fire."
  • "The lords are presenting their sons as suitors for your betrothal."
  • "I won't go through with it! You can't force me!"
  • "Legends are lessons and they ring with truths."
  • "It's marriage, its not the end of the world."
  • "Stubbornness is entirely from your side of the family."
  • "We can't just run away from who we are."
  • "I don't want my life to be over. I want my freedom."
  • "If you could just try to see what I do, I do out of love."
  • "I present my heir and sire, who defended our land from the northern invaders and, with his own sword, stabbed and vanquished thousands more."
  • "I present my eldest son, who scuttled the Viking war ships with his bare hands. Vanquished two thousand more."
  • "You've had your go at each other, show a little decorum."
  • "In accordance with our laws, by the rights of our heritage, only the first born of each of the great leaders may be presented as champions."
  • "You just embarrassed them! You just embarrassed me!"
  • "I will never be like you! I'd rather die than be like you!"
  • "Wood cannot be imbued with magical property."
  • "Never conjure where you carve, very important."
  • "The last time I did this was for a prince."
  • "Have you changed your mind at all about the marriage and all that?"
  • "If he so much as sees you, you're dead!"
  • "Mend the bond torn by pride."
  • "Find those by the creek, did you? They're Nightshade berries. They're poisonous."
  • "Yours was an alliance forged in bravery and friendship and it lives to this day."
  • "My mother, the queen, finds in her heart that we be free to write our own story. Follow our hears and find love in our time."
  • "Let these lads try win her heart before they win her hand, if they can."
  • "Oh, count your stars, lass."
  • "I'll avenge your mother!"
  • "This is all my fault! I did this to you, to us."
  • "You've always been there for me. You've never given up on me. I just need you back."
  • "Some say fate is beyond our command, but I know better."
  • "Our destiny is within us. You just have to be brave enough to see it."

I’ve been thinking a bit about representation for trans people in rpgs, and what we’ve ended up with in Exalted. Like, I really do appreciate the length the writers have gone to and continue to go to to supply places for trans characters. I also think that we can’t really settle for just the setpieces, and I guess I have a bit of a weird problem with the way we’ve had it so far. The term I’ve come to use for it is situational transness, something that I think both Coral’s Tya and Chiaroscuro’s Dereth fall into.

This is a little long so I’ve put the rest under the cut.

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Perspectives::closed for thraaaaaaaanduuuuuuuuiiiiiiiil


Getting a scholar ship, and perfect scores on his MCATS were easy. The first year of med school was pratically review, however money became and issue year two and Giles found himself standing in a robe waiting to disrobe infront of fifty odd art and funny enough his anatomy class to be draw, naked of the next six weeks.

Yes this was going to pay his rent for the next two months but he didn’t have to enjoy being naked infront of strangers and class mates.
Giles stripped off when the instructor told him leaving him bare to the room.

He stood up on the platform that held a stool and a table and leaned against the edge of the table watching everone file in for class politely ignoring the appreciative mutters and whistles from his own class mates.
The art students had a little more decorum it seemed.