a hassle because of other people

Today I joined Discord so I could talk to other people who were also into @CrankGameplays, and something happened that was amazing and awesome. For those of you who do not know, @crankgameplays basically set up one giant chat room with different chats going on all at once. I wasn’t going to join, mainly because I didn’t want to go through the hassle of signing up. However, today I finally caved and joined in. Most of the time what happens is you talk to people, you eventually have to leave for one reason or another, and its not really deep or anything. I’m not sure exactly what happened, but the group of people I was talking with were just as obsessed as I am and we somehow ended up talking for 3 solid hours. And we didn’t talk about random shit the entire time either. We got into some deep stuff, whether it was talking about relatives or best friends diagnosed with cancer and how to handle that, losing your pet and trying to move on, or talking about my depression that I’ve had for over a year. We supported each other and gave advice about stuff. And while yes, we did talk about some random crap, we really got to know each other. However, eventually people had to start leaving and stuff, and no one wanted to go. We wanted to be able to talk to each other. So before we left we all exchanged our Twitters and it’s been a grand total of 8 hours since, and already I get the feeling that some weird shits gonna go down eventually with all of us tweeting the same thing at Ethan or having huge conversations with each other with him tagged because we were replying to his post or whatever. It’s already happened a little bit. So anyway, basically I’ve made new friends, formed a support group with them, and had the one of the funniest times ever on Discord. I’m really looking forward to doing this more.

Baby Boomer: Millenials never socialize, they’re so lazy!

Meanwhile, we’re holding mass-scale conversations in group chats on 10 different social media platforms.

  • We don’t have to wait for someone to get the fuck off the computer so we can use the phone. 
  • And we don’t have to spin a dial several times in order to get the right numbers. 
  • And we don’t have to wait days for our letters to get to and from because we having functioning instant messaging systems. 
  • And we don’t have to pull out a purse sized cellphone and manipulate the antenna until it works. 
  • Nor do we have to spend hours describing something, because we can just share the link and let everyone see it at once. 
  • We don’t get cut off from each other if someone uses the computer. 
  • We make friends all over the world. 
  • We find people who share our interests faster than y’all did. 
  • And we’re more open-minded than the former generation.
  • We organize meetings faster and with less hassle.
  • Through the ability to spread information in mere seconds, we can quickly draw attention to particular subjects so long as we word things right.
  • We can video call people from around the world.
  • MEANING: we don’t need to know the complete interior of their assholes in order to be friends with them.

Yeah, we’re so lazy. And we definitely don’t socialize.

I’ll repeat this as many times as it takes saying: You have every right to dislike a ship, to not enjoy the dynamic, to want to avoid seeing it, to not associate with people who make or consume content for it. You can do this with no reasoning or justification whatsoever. But don’t make up reasons why it’s immoral or wrong to enjoy something when nothing has been proven one way or the other. Especially don’t when the content creators specifically say that it’s open to interpretation. Don’t hassle people, attack them, assume heinous things about them as a person, or send them shocking and upsetting content just because their interests and opinions don’t align with yours. I don’t understand how such a basic concept is somehow lost on such a vast amount of people, but since we all need the reminder, here it is:

Leave people you disagree with alone as long as they aren’t doing anything legitimately harmful. Your personal opinions about an ambiguous subject that is up to interpretation are no more or less valid than another person’s. And for god’s sake, treat people with respect even if you don’t agree with one another. Internet anonymity does not give you the right to hurt others, no matter where you stand.

to be honest? i don’t know why other people in the ace/aro community consider being reminded of our oppression to be positivity.

i would much rather not get hurt because i don’t want to go out with someone or have sex on the first date.

i would much rather not people get yelled at for not wanting to have kids (when adoption is also an option.)

i would much rather not get hassled at school for not wanting to have a datefriend.

so, you know what i have to say?

its okay, ace and aro people! nobody’s going to hurt you. you’re safe.

yevie  asked:

If it doesn't make you uncomfortable, would you be alright with tagging ace-discourse? I think your response to tumblr ace community is completely fair, but as a bi-ace who doesn't go near the tumblr ace community (or any ace community) for a lot of the reasons you're upset with them/other personal reasons, it makes me feel uncomfortably lumped in. (For me ace is a 'useful way to describe my experiences since I really like labels' and not a statement about people who don't identify as ace.)

This makes me feel a little bit weird but I should probably have an ace discourse tag. I don’t like to tag discourse stuff with ‘ace discourse’ or 'asexual’ or related tags specifically because there are a lot of shitty people who track those tags and will hassle people for posting stuff they disagree with in them so I might need to think up an easy alternative but in the meantime I’ll tag stuff with 'ace discourse’ I guess?

I appreciate that you aren’t part of the whole tumblr ace “scene” or whatever and I try to acknowledge fairly regularly that interactions I’ve had with people about this stuff online tend to differ pretty extremely from interactions I’ve had with people - including people who identify as asexual - offline, and I think that tumblr… culture… stuff… tends to make these conversations a lot more difficult to have productively. I’m really sorry that my posts have made you feel lumped in or targeted.

That being said, I, uh… without being rude, you using the term asexual as a convenient shorthand while feeling at the same time in conflict with a lot of the stuff that is, frankly, foundational to modern definitions of asexuality is your business, not mine. I totally get having a problem with things that other people with whom you share an identifier say, I often am really uncomfortable with bi tumblr, and I have occasionally felt anxious about people who I follow who aren’t bi getting into conflicts with bi tumblr at large and making posts about “bi tumblr” and etc. However, in those situations, I would consider it out of line for me to make those peoples’ conflicts with OTHER individuals with whom I have nothing in common except like, a sexuality, about me by asking them to accommodate for my presence in discussions that I, frankly, am usually not even active in but am only an observer to.

I just… I don’t want to make people feel lumped in but there is a point where, I think, if something isn’t about you, maybe don’t make it about you? If you mainly identify as asexuality for convenience and expediency, and you disagree with a lot of online asexual politics, that is cool! But like… I don’t know you individually, I have no way of really intuiting these things especially if you avoid talking about them, all I can do is try to make it clear specifically WHAT I have a problem with in terms of tumblr etc ace discourse and hope that people understand that. And if the thing that I have a problem with is not a thing that you are doing, maybe don’t assume that I’m talking about you.

I will start tagging for discourse, though.

I hope this doesn’t come across as mean or abrasive I just… ehnnn I feel weird about the way this was presented. If I’m misinterpreting here let me know.

the most antisocial person in the whole universe

People are scary creatures

At least that’s what she thinks. 

Her name is Victoria, a beautiful name that represent Roman Goddess of Victory. But unlike the name itself, this girl is such a pessimistic, negative, and ignorant individual. She refuses to interact with other, even from her family. 

She’s a Wallflower

She observe people from afar, afraid of getting close. Always, always, and always alone in her own little world. She pulls away when someone get close to her, not because she’s shy. In fact if you truly know her, she’s a fiery person deep down. It just she thinks that talking to people is such a hassle. It’s fine for  her to do everything alone. Only trust yourself, that’s her way of life.

But how did she become like this?

No one really knows why, not even me. Her former classmate said that she’s not the girl they used to know. She used to be a straightforward and bright person. For her to turned this way, something must have happened back then. A betrayal perhaps? That explains the way she see people with so much distrust. And recently she develop this weird hobby to collect people’s weaknesses and shameful past. I’m not really sure why she do that, maybe that way she can protect herself from people. Maybe she’ll use it as a trump card when people bully her. Yeah, that’s kinda twisted, i know… I wonder what she’ll become in several years, will she stay the same or change to be a better person, i don’t know. That’s something only God knows.


this character was inspired by the person i described on the previous post, with slightly (or many) differences in her personality. 

anonymous asked:

Someone I follow linked to a longingfordeath[.] wordpress [.] com post about racist white men that marry Asian women. While I can see what they're saying, it seems more anecdotal, writer seems to hate AW, glorify WW, uses hapa incorrectly. . Just wondering if this is a case of not having to agree 100% or if I should bother. Thanks!

If you respect them maybe start a discussion but otherwise it might not be worth the hassle. It’s okay to disagree with someone who saying horrible things. I could see maybe the misuse of hapa just being a misunderstanding because a lot of people do that but the other things you brought up are not okay.

– Jay

when I knew what being trans was, it was such a struggle with myself to let myself know that that’s what I was because I guess I had a preconceived idea of what being a trans guy consisted of and so I never let myself even think about the possibility of me being trans cause I didn’t fit any of my criteria and all that did for me was put me through so much pain and confusion and unnecessary shit

so, I guess what I’m saying is, there’s no set “way to be trans” 

trans people can be however because we’re just..people. If you think ur questioning, let urself question, don’t let stereotypes and other stuff hold you back

 there’s no way to be a girl or a guy or any other gender. Once you realize that, it’ll save you so much hassle. Be safe kids

arukou-arukou  asked:

Ask meme: 5, 9, 21

5) character you were most surprised to end up writing

tiberius i guess?? considering i didn’t know he existed. one of the first things i wrote was a series where all the avengers are supposed to get their turn to be hurt, so i expected to write pretty much everyone at some point or another

9) what, if anything, do you do for inspiration?

hassle other people. i tend to passively get inspiration by being online and reading and day to day life and so on, but when i’m actively trying to get my brain to work i usually seek other people who will talk with me about whatever i’m working on. i tend to get stuck seeing Only One Way things can play out and when that doesn’t work for plot reasons or logic reasons or whatever else, i get stuck because i can’t imagine the scene/events going any other way. having someone else be like “but what if x happens” helps me get out of that

21) what do you think when you read over your older work?

‘hey, this is pretty great!!’ i actually…read my own fic a lot?? …a lot a lot. like…if i’m revising something i’ll reread it, if i get a review or comment i’ll reread it, if i want a quick bedtime story and i need something i can trust won’t give me bad feelings i read it, if it’s been a few months i read it, if i’m re-archiving it i read it, i just…re-read my fic a lot. usually there’s some minor things i’m displeased with but generally if it’s finished and not completely ridiculous, i enjoy it.

i read something i wrote in college like 10 years ago and while i think some of it is kind of ridiculous, for the most part i thought it was pretty good!

a large quantity of wrecked lives actually continue on

i’m seeing a few posts going around lately giving advice to prospective new sex workers that give some variation on the (very solid!) advice: if being outed as a sex worker would wreck your life, just don’t do it. 

and that’s very good advice specifically for people who are hassling SWers on tumblr, because, frankly, if you have the time and luxury to sit around and wonder if sex work is right for you, then you probably have the luxury to meet your needs some other way. 

but that’s not always the case. both times that i started doing sex work (admittedly, the break between “round one fini” and “round two begin” was less than three months) i did not have any other viable options that involved eating. i couldn’t get or hold down a civilian job. i didn’t have a support network that was accessible or that could give me material help even in the short term. i didn’t qualify for any social services.  

and my situation honestly wasn’t even that bad.  

so, say that being outed would wreck your life, but you’re still making the call that potential-trouble-tomorrow is preferable to the definite-brokeness-now troubles that not doing sex work is leaving you with. here is some advice:

obviously, take sensible precautions, which will vary based on your niche, but universally include things like: don’t use your real name or life details, assume your friends/family/service providers are both massively whorephobic and shit at keeping secrets unless you have incontrovertible evidence suggesting otherwise, and plan to disguise your income stream/resume gap as necessary. and so forth.

but you can spend forty hours a week taking precautions and get outed by the most ridiculously unpredictable shit. so rather than figure out how to head off ever more remote possibilities, do this: plan for what you’ll do when you get outed.

i know, it’ll ruin everything. but what then? are you at risk for losing your housing? custody of your children? a civilian job?  your scholarship? a shot at your future career? think through each eventuality (write it down somewhere secure! i am a big fan of literally writing out plans) and figure out, in the face of the worst-case scenario, what you would actually do, whether it’s what homeless shelters you’d look to, or what you’d do with your life if you can’t teach kindergarten or finish your MSW. walk yourself through every step of the plan – do all the research you need to do now, before anything happens.   

this way, if/when you’re outed, you can spring right into action, maybe even mitigating some of the damage, instead of panicking and wondering how bad it could get.  maybe you’ll figure out that your worst-case-scenarios aren’t that bad, or that they’re so bad that they make you rethink the appeal of the definite-brokeness-now situation.  either way, you’re in a more informed and empowered position to protect yourself than you were before. 

that’s a much better use of your energy. 

Confession:  I’m pro-Morristair (Morrigan x Alistair) and I get some people not like the ship. Really, I do. But do not come into my bubble, into my personal space and tell me ‘Morrigan and Alistair hate each other!’ or ‘Alistair would never go for Morrigan, he’s obviously in love with a female Warden/Anora/Leliana!’ or 'Morrigan is obviously a lesbian, the writers just wrote her straight because they’re homophobic!’ NO. STOP. Think what you will, but DO NOT BRING YOUR HATE TO ME. It’s just like people that hate Adoribull but yet, they go to people and hassle them. Please, for the love of whatever you want to love,LEAVE. PEOPLE. ALONE. ESPECIALLY if they are pro or anti whatever you are. You have no business with them, they have no business with you. There’s a reason people are leaving DA…

Clearing Things Up

Okay, so it’s been kind of a rough few days and there was a lot of misinformation going around, and things were said that shouldn’t have been, but we’ve all talked things over and it’s all cool now.

Yes, the CoLab is closing… kind of… Wait! Don’t run off!

We had some discussion about the future of the group, which got a little heated because of course, everybody’s pretty frustrated by little content we’ve been putting out lately, especially people in the group.

So a few senior members have left. Some of them will still continue in their roles, and may pop up now and again in future productions. Others are riding off into the sunset. Godspeed and best of luck with all their endeavours, and many thanks for their years of service, and no, we don’t have any bad feelings towards them. Do not hassle them about it.

Those who remain will be starting a new group. We’ll have a slightly different way of organising projects and things. We’re going to be less of a VO troupe and more of a team who organise projects with voice acting in them and find people to fill roles for them. We’ll be doing more outsourcing rather than always being confined to feeling like a project must have a majority of core members in the cast which was often limiting. We’ll tell you all about the new group when we’ve got it set up. We’re busy making ground rules, logos, website etc. We hope to make it great!

Speaking of the CoLab, the old channel isn’t going anywhere. It will stay up for posterity with all your episodes of Let’s Read Homestuck there and all the good memories.

New content will continue on the new channel. We’ll announce that when it’s ready, probably in January so we can set things up over Christmas. We’re planning for continuation of ongoing series, the shorter ones of which we might rehost on the new channel for continuity, as well as at least one new thing that’s been in demand. Let’s Read Homestuck, we plan to at least finish Openbound, then look at how we feel about continuation. We’ve decided to simplify the arduous lip sync to a simpler style to speed production on the rest of it because we just want to get it done at this point, and I’m sure you all do to.

I’d like to apologise formally for any distress caused by assumptions and miscommunication. It’s been a rough few days, tempers got frayed and we all had to take a good honest look at ourselves, which is never easy. Suffice it to say, things have calmed down, we’ve come to an agreement on friendly terms, and we’re going to continue on. Alex is leaving us and will be in charge of the old channel. Ryan and I are organising the new group. We’ll let you know any more when we have concrete facts to go on and things set up.

-Admin Kate, who is going somewhere, but hopefully somewhere good with all of you.

It’s important to be around kinfolk

Part of being Black in an all white space is knowing what issues are worth the headache and knowing what issues to ignore. You get to hear a lot of white nonsense and it is up to you to decide whether you should ignore what you heard, or bring it up and ultimately end up no where. You end up ignoring a whole lot either way, not because you are a coward or fear confrontation, but for your sanity, peace of mind and survival. Some things are not worth the aggravation. Escalation or “checking” people only works if the other person is receptive. Of course, this doesn’t mean you should ignore serious matters. Not at all. It’s just that after a while, you’ll arrive at a place where you will realize that some things are just not worth the hassle.

White people generally aren’t receptive to criticism of any kind from Black folks, especially when it’s criticism of whiteness and their obtuse views on race, or the ridiculous things they say. This is very true for progressive whites. I can deal with open white racists in that they are what they are. There is no ambiguity there. What I cannot deal with is the white liberal who thinks that their progressiveness means they cannot be racist or that everything they say or do is fine. I generally don’t engage or argue on matters of race, but today was a rough day. I swallowed a bit and let it go. I made the right decision. Never do or say things when you are angry. Try to calm down a bit if possible. Hey, I came home to fry plantain, so life ain’t so bad.

Anyway, there’s a certain flavor of benevolence towards Black people with most white progressives that just rubs me the wrong way. It always manifests when there is a discussion about race, and they make it seem like you should be thankful for their progressiveness, as if they are doing you a favor. For this reason, I never bring up race talk with white people. It’s neither worth my time or effort, and I gain absolutely nothing from it.

The problem is that progressive whites always want to bring up race talk with Black folks, you know, to show how “progressive” they are. It’s almost like it’s performance art for them and they’re playing an activist character. They don’t view me as human. I’m just supposed to be “on” all the time. I’m supposed to be a raging volcano, snarling and angry 24/7. I can’t be happy. I can’t be the happy, upbeat person that I genuinely am who likes to crack jokes, laugh and listen to music all day. I can’t be relaxed. I can’t look forward to an upcoming date. I can’t look forward to dinner. I can’t look forward to cooking. I can’t look forward to just getting lost in the city taking photographs on the street. I need to be surrounded by Black death, Black pain and Black suffering because that is my purpose in life. I’m meant to be angry and progressive whitey over here is being an ally.

Here they go being an ally, shoving Black suffering down my throat. It’s why I exist you know. I’m meant to just watch videos of Black people dying all day. I’m supposed to tweet and make tumblr posts about it all day. Message after message. Email after email, they eagerly share the death of people that look like me like it’s nothing. “Hey, watch this video of a Black man getting his brains blown out by a cop. Isn’t it outrageous? I noticed you haven’t posted anything about it yet. How come? Did you see it yet? I want to know your thoughts. Let me send it to you in HD. You’re Black, how do you feel about that? I’m white and I’m annoyed. Oh, here’s another video of another Black person being killed. Oh, here’s a link to this article of a cop beating up some random Black person. What are your thoughts? You haven’t posted about Boko Haram in a while. Here’s a video of them slitting a man’s throat.” Rinse and repeat.

They pass this around like a soundcloud mix. I’m supposed to be this machine made of iron, void of feelings and emotion. I’m just supposed to watch Black people dying all the time. It never occurs to them that I don’t want to watch it. I’ve watched enough. Sometimes I wonder if some white people are human. How are they this oblivious? How? Clearly, these videos don’t affect them the same way they affect me. I wonder about people who aren’t affected by videos of murder and death. How can you consume this day in and day out with no effect? Are you human?

You want to know my thoughts. What do you think I think about Black people being killed? What do you think I think about state sanctioned extrajudicial murder of Black people? What do you think I think about Boko Haram? If I don’t say anything to you or make a post, does it mean I’m not aware? Must I give commentary? Is this my job? Is that the reason for my existence? Maybe I don’t want to. Maybe I am tired of watching Black death. Maybe I have nothing else to say. Maybe other people have said things far more eloquently than I could. Maybe my voice is broken, and I choose to focus on what makes me happy, because I could be a hashtag tomorrow. Look, just walking by cops makes me uneasy, and I shouldn’t feel uneasy because I didn’t do anything wrong, but yet I am. Just the mere site of them makes me uncomfortable. Please, let me have some joy in my life while I still have a life. Do you my dear white allies ever think about any of this before shoving Black death down my throat? Do you think all Black people want to watch Black death all day? Can we get a day off? Can I get a day off?

For this reason, I am grateful for family and friends. I need time to decompress, and this happens when I am around my kinfolk. I have to be around Black people. Daily microaggressions can really wear you down and if you’re a Black person surrounded by this daily (school, work, social media, neighborhood etc), this can wreck havoc on your sense of well being.

I like getting away and getting lost in personal projects, taking photos of African musicians performing and backstage, taking pictures of friends and family, and documenting things, listening to vinyl, eating good food with friends and family, and socializing. I want to focus on life and a lot of that is with a camera. Little moments, big moments, casual moments, fleeting moments, encounters with strangers on the street, I want to focus on the beauty of this. I want to focus on my art. Yet, here you are reminding me of Black death. Apparently, I can’t focus on those of us you haven’t killed.

I like being around people like me because they make life worth living. Try to be around people like you, or rather, kinfolk that love and appreciate you. It’s the antidote to a lot of white bullshit, and I’m neck deep in white bullshit. You probably are too.

@scmuchtrouble

Hex was becoming lax in her ways. Ordinarily, she killed in secret. This wasn’t out of any fear of being caught, it was just because she didn’t want to deal with the hassle that came with being caught. But caught she had been, literally red handed with her victim’s heart between her teeth.

There was no point lying about what she did, she wasn’t afraid or ashamed of it. But the place they took her to had so much security that for a moment the hybrid seriously wished she had. After being shoved roughly into a cell and had a few people in white coats peer in at her, murmuring to each other in a way that made Hex decide they she would rip out their tongues before she left, Hex decided she’d spend at least the night before planning her escape.

ok so i went on insta last night and went thru the warriors tag and i was so grossed out??? i found multiple accounts who took screenshots of our videos and reposted them with gross text all over it or using it for rp?? i found one account who probably had 100+ photos of my stuff, from youtube videos & my tumblr sketches and even my dA stuff. 

i asked them to take it down 3 times (on 1 pic) and they refused, so i commented on some of the other pics asking for it to be taken down (i figured if i was annoying enough that they would just avoid the hassle and remove them) but now they blocked me and???? i think they posted something about it because i’ve gotten like 3 comments today of people trying to attack me even though i WAS DEFENDING MY WORK that i have LEGALLY COPYRIGHTED 

i know i seem like i’m overreacting, but you have to defend artist’s rights!! by reposting their work you’re taking away the views, followers, likes etc (on yt, that can determine whether or not we even get paid!!) and over time the artist doesn’t even get recognition for their work (most of the time these insta accounts say artist : unknown) so you can’t even follow the artist if you want to

ربنا لا تجعلنا فتنة للذين كفروا واغفر لنا
Our Lord, make us not [objects of] torment for the disbelievers and forgive us
— 

Qur’an, Sūrat al-Mumtaḥanah (60:5)

I don’t normally add commentary to the verses I post but this is an exception. As a Muslim your character is so important. You always see someone losing their cool with another. Or we hassle someone when we could have done something without them. Islam is so beautiful because if followed correctly, it can honestly create the closest thing (if not an actual) to a Utopia. Treating family and other Muslims with kindness is already mentioned several times but your neighbours also has a right over you. And on top of all that, there’s an actual supplication in the Qur’an where you’re asking Allah swt to not be a burden/nuisance to non-muslims. Your character and your actions will invite people to Islam.

Jacks Vlog got me thinking!

I’ve already commented this on his video but I fancied making a post about it too.

Towards the end of Jack’s vlog, he spoke about the YouTube comments and how they’ve gotten more aggressive… and it made me realise how little I interact with the YouTube comments now for the simple fact that they are nasty.

But thing is, I have tough skin. I can handle hate and spite really well and things don’t really offend me… yet I almost feel shameful about commenting anything on videos. It’s like a “if I say this, people will tell me to kill myself and it’ll remain in the comments section forever for other people to see” type of shame, so I just take the easy road and comment rarely to avoid the hassle.

But Jacks video really got me thinking about it and I’m really appreciating the effort he’s making to turn that around because it’s safe to say a lot of people have given up on the comments section by now. I’m gonna start commenting more on videos because I wanna help improve them too!

Increase Funds for type 1 diabetes

Type 1 Diabetes a is truly devastating and yet forgotten disease. I would like to tell my friends and colleagues that I am type 1 diabetic but also am scared of being hassled and judged. When you say diabetic everyone is on your case with little or no knowledge. People also make comments that it is normal, the other illnesses are much worse, but name me one organ that diabetes does not affect, tell me one illness that in order to eat requires several injections. It is time that a cure for diabetes should become a priority, eu & usa funds should be increased and solve the problem once and for all. Enough suffering, and people who have not suffered from this illness should not say to us it is not an important illness, because they have no idea how we live and what we go through!