a colbert christmas

Stephen: Oh look, we’re under a mistletoe, boy this is akward. By Christmas tradition we’re supposed to kiss..

Jon: Really? In Jewish tradition it means we have to take a *one minute of censored out sex stuff**makes sexual noises* then you’re supposed to go *one more minute of censored out sex stuff* with a lamb shank.

—  Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart, A Colbert Christmas (The Greatest Gift of All)
Another Christmas Song
  • Another Christmas Song
  • Stephen Colbert
  • A Colbert Christmas: The Greatest Gift of All!
Play

ANOTHER COLBERT CLASSIC HEADING YOUR WAY!!

LYRICS :3:

Ho! It’s another Christmas song
Whoa! Get ready brother for another Christmas song
They play for a month, Ad infinitum
(Latin phrase – meaning continuously without end)
One day it struck me someone must write ‘em
So! It’s another Christmas song

Santa Claus singing on naughty snow
Reindeer ringing in the mistletoe
The manger’s on fire,
The holly’s a-glow
Hear the baby Jesus cryin’ ho ho ho

Hey! It’s another Christmas song
Yay! Another oft’ returning (often returning)
Royalty earning Christmas song
I’ve got plenty more so go buy a modem
Log on to iTunes and pay to download ‘em
Pay! For another Christmas song

Chestnuts glisten on a silent night
Sleigh-bells kissing by candle light
The tree is frozen, the winter’s bright
Who’d have thought the wise men look so white

You! Don’t you wanna sing along?
To! My humble yuletide
Dreamed up poolside
Find more similar lyrics on Christmas song
Make it a part of your holiday canon
Make it the heart of my retirement plannin’ and
Do! Sing another Christmas song

BEAT IT INTO ‘EM FELLAS!
WATCH MY FEET FLY!

But wait! Who’s this?

Young ones starving on a dead-end street
Taped up tabloids on their frost-bit feet
Hear what they carol as they huddle for heat

All children:
Please help the “Colbert Children” eat

Whoa! Just another Christmas song
No! This is like no other Christmas-mother-lovin’-song
Public to whom I’m so proud to have pandered
Please save my family and make this a standard
Go! Join the ever-growing throng
Who are singing
And swingin’
While my kids are clinging to the hope
My register’s ching-ching chinging from the cash I’m bringing
From another Christmas song! Copyright Stephen Colbert! ;3 Song sung by Stephen Colbert !