a child's book of teeth

So I’m just going to come out and say it.

If you’re a Jonsa or Jonerys shipper (yeah I’m not censoring this post because it’s targeted at you) and you think Jonrya is a crackship that encourages pedophilia and incest, then you should take a massive step back and check yourself.

Please bear in mind before you raise your banners that I’m referring to those that go out of your way to disrespect my ship. This is not a post telling you your ship is wrong or mine is right.

But if you’re going to bring out labels to trash a ship, you’d best make sure you don’t end up looking like a hypocrite.

Don’t believe me? Let’s begin.

To Jonerys shippers,

You are shipping aunt and nephew. That is incest in literally every culture, country, language, planet. Cousin marriages are still practiced and are not frowned upon in many societies. Try again.

“It doesn’t count because they don’t know they’re related but Jon and Arya grew up as siblings,” you say.

Yes. Yes it does count. DNA doesn’t give a shit about circumstances of birth, and neither should you.

The Targaryens married brother and sister, raised under the same roof, for generations, just saying.

“But Jonrya is pedophilia!!!” you say, beginning to get angry.

Dany was married at 13 to Khal Drogo, who is many years older than good old Jonny boy. Their relationship is romanticized all the time. I’d say that is far creepier but what do I know? I’m just someone who is aware that Arya is 16 in the show and 12 in the new book.

“12 is still a child,” you say, grinding your teeth.

Oh, is it? Well spotted. This is Westeros, folks. If child marriages in this universe make you squeamish, I suggest you find something else for your uncorrupted mind. Besides, Jonrya fans have always spoken of their ship in the future. You know what happens in the future? 12-year olds aren’t 12 anymore. Shocking, I know.

Besides, the definition of a child in this universe is very different to our world, and I can’t believe I have to actually say this. For God’s sake, Bran at the age of 9 considers himself almost a man grown. I rest my case.

“Jon is still much older.”

Jon is five years older. My parents are ten years apart, and yet, here I am. I should ask them how ever they got over their disgust at their age gap to procreate.

I could go on, but it’s time to move on to an even more hypocritical ship.

Dearest Jonsa shippers,

Everything above applies to you and more. But I have to say, despite our differences, I admire your tenacity.

I admire how you ship a girl only two years older than Arya, and then turn around and say she is a child.

I admire how you ship Sansa with her cousin, and then turn around and say it’s not “as incestuous” because she was less sister-y than the other sister so it totally doesn’t count because reasons.

Newsflash, that’s not how this works.

Your ship is incest.

All our ships are incest so it’s not a critique, but for shit’s sake, enough with the whole “Jon and Arya are siblings but Jon and Sansa are not.”

Just because your sibling is a bitch to you or ignores you, does not make them any less your sibling.

Also, two years’ gap is not a big deal, and most definitely does not separate an adult from a child.

I’m going to end this right here, since I’ve said what I needed to.

Ship anything you want, I literally could not give less of a fuck, but please don’t go name-calling and taking a shit on something people enjoy.

Thank you.