Xena is one stoic hoe. Gets shot in the neck with poison dart. Pockets it and doesn’t bother to mention it. Realizes she’s going to go blind while saving her friend. Moves on with a slightly annoyed look. Gets stuck in her nemesis’s body. Doesn’t seem flustered. Asks for a bowl of water after a fight. Casually spits out a jaw tooth. Allows herself to be hung upside down and beaten nearly to death to stay undercover. Makes a joke about it right after. But, man, you even suggest that you’re gonna fuck with Gabrielle, and that woman becomes one sublime dramatic hoe.
So you know that whole “Someday, my prince will come to rescue me. Riding a handsome white stead. Dressed in shining armor.” concept…?
I’m pretty positive I would rather have: “Someday, my Empress will come to rescue me. Riding a wild black stallion. Dressed in black leather.”