No okay but imagine if Dean walked in on Cas crying. He’s hunched over with his arms wrapped around his stomach, nails digging into his sides as if warding off some immeasurable wave of pain.
His sobs no longer even make noise, they’re just gasps of air being pushed through open lips and clenched teeth. His eyes are screwed tightly shut and he just looks so infinitely tired.
Dean remembers that Castiel, his angel, has seen millennia. He’s seen civilizations crumble and the earth ruined.
At first he thinks something’s terribly wrong, remembering the leviathan, but sees the slow drips of tears rolling down his cheeks. Cas looks up, his bright blue eyes locking with green ones, and to deans surprise and horror, he sees a kind of dead acceptance in them. Its the same look he’s seen etched into his own face on the nights when everything almost became too much.
“I’m so lost.” Cas tries to say, except his voice cracks half way through, so the last word is only a whisper.