AU where Persons A and B are roommates and A is a vampire and doesn’t even hide it but B just thinks they’re joking all the time.

“Is that wine? Can I have a sip?”

“It’s blood.”

“Haha, whatever you say.”


“Where did you get these sweet fake fangs?”

“They’re real. I’m a vampire.”

“Sure you are, and I’m Bigfoot.”

Tol and Smol things

the tol randomly lifting the smol and putting them down somewhere else like people do with babies and the smol being so confused like “why??????”

the smol being the perfect height for surprise tickle attacks because no one looks down so no one sees them coming

the tol using the smol as an armrest and the smol acts annoyed but secretly loves it

the smol just burrowing into the tol’s shoulder/chest when they hug and the tol resting their chin on the top of the smol’s head

the smol hiding behind the tol and literally no one can see them because they’re so smol or because the tol is so tol

the smol being a tiny little ball of energy and rage and constantly jumping around and threatening to fight people 

the tol being the one who has to calm down the smol and apologize when the smol says “fite me” to that five year old who took the last box of lucky charms in the store 

the tol giving the smol piggyback rides

the smol running full speed at the tol and barrelling into them but only succeeding in bouncing off because they’re so smol

the smol being the big spoon and the tol being the little spoon sometimes

the tol puts all the things on the top shelf so that the smol has to jump to reach them

the smol retaliating by putting all the things on the bottom shelf so the tol has to bend over or kneel on the floor to reach them

the smol having a huge ass dog like a saint bernard or a wolfhound or something big enough to ride

the tol having a fucking chihuahua