Who-am-I-to-deny-the-truth

Is it true? Is it true?
That’s all I want to know. It’s a fairly simple response, I would say. Something swift, something short. It’s all just a syllable- my hopes, my faith, my desires. Confirm them or deny them, just please say something.

Was it real? Was it real?
I beg of you not to spare my feelings. I deserve the truth, that’s all you owe me. I promise to not ask of anything more, just honesty, please honesty. I don’t think my heart can take anymore lies, it’s already sick from the ones you spoke before.

What am I? Who am I?
Surely I wasn’t just a body. Surely I meant something more. I can’t bare to think I was nothing, after being told I was everything. The stars, the earth, the world, the heavens; at least that’s what you whispered to my skin, at least that’s what you burned into my lungs.

Is it over? Is it done?
All I want is to be free. Please, I only ask that you not be selfish. Spare  me of what you can, I’m too tired to linger for much longer. My feet are dragging behind me, my body can’t keep up. Pretty soon I’ll stop moving entirely, pretty soon I’ll be miles behind you.

—  Yes/No
The Anger Of The Left

The world is a heavy burden
a place that builds you up
with broken bits of brick,
rage, and pain.

The wind carries the names
of those who are to silent
to ever really blame me
for all that we lost.

I rush to write this
memory of truth I found
before it slips my grip
and drips down into
the crypt that carried the few
who left me behind to brood.

I am angry and sad
to see my granddad
discarded at a nursing home.
A diabetic left to die alone
not because he was not loved
but because we all had lives to live.
I forgive all of them
but deny myself that mercy.
On the last day he was alive
he said goodbye
in his own way.
When I said “I loved him”
he weakly replied “thank you.”
Though it was not his intent to,
he made me I feel like I had failed him.
My familial affections
must have seemed like rain
on the desert wind,
brief and rare.
I left him there
and he died.
Frequently,
I wake day or night
with tears in my eye

I am angry and sad
that I saw my grandma wither,
looking like
some small sickly goblin
at the end of her life
because her loved ones
would not let her
let herself die.
They forced her to eat
when she could not leave
that bed where she slept.
While death crept
I kept to myself
to lazy and afraid
to deal with the tension
of arguing with her
about my lack of
her religion.
So, she died
and my anger
simmered inside
as the tears flowed
outside.

I am angry and sad
that I treated my brother so bad.
I was struggling at nineteen
and did not want to see
the mother who hurt me.
So, I avoided him
left him trapped
alone with an abusive
patriarch
to break his heart
and his pain broke mine.
Though he has forgiven me
I cannot let go so easily
and my rage keeps boiling.

I am angry and sad,
made to feel bad,
left seething mad
because I saw
living loved ones
exit my life
beyond the stage lights.
It was their right
but it feels like
their leaving
was saying
that I was not good enough
to keep the ones I loved
in my life.
Black haired girl
left for the Army.
Black haired girl
left our online friendship.
Blond girl
left for her original lover.
One friend gone
then time takes another.
Brown haired girl
moved on to someone better.
How could I not,
I had to let her.
Here my heart breaks again
thought I made a beautiful friend
but it is her turn to leave.

In being left again
I turn my pain and rage within
to disintegrate the one I hate.
I despise those mirror eyes
whom are not good enough
to keep the ones I love.
I long for the day
gray hairs, false teeth,
and wrinkles take me
to a place where no one
can ever leave me again.

-2017

Look guys, look at this beauty right here!

Kido : Um, about that.
Kano : The truth is we got married~
Kido : Wait!?
Baka!! Wasn’t that best to keep quite now and tell them afterwards?
Kano : Eh~ I guess it can’t be helped?
Shin : Again, am I the only one who didn’t know about this…!?
They all heard this for the first time
Gang : EEEHHHHHHH!!

Things that are beautiful here:

  1. Kano isn’t hit by Kido
  2. Kido is not denying that the marriage happened
  3. Kido didn’t call Kano a liar

What do you get with all three?

Kano is not lying. Genuinely. Happily. Declaring they are married.

…Am I the only here who is proud of them?

I Miss Caspar

So I got the idea of writing this fic because while Caspar was away in L.A all we kept seeing is how much he missed Joe, not the other way around. Obviously, Joe missed him but since he isn’t good at explaining or I mean, expressing his feelings, that’s why he didn’t do it as much. (Except on YouNow) I think this came out better than I planned. 

Note: This ended up being a kinda smut…I don’t know how I got to that point but I mean, who am I to complain??? Am I RIGHT??

Title: I Miss Caspar

Summary: Joe keeps denying he misses Caspar until one day he admits the truth.

Keep reading

American Sniper PSA

I have never been so ashamed of people in my life. Chris Kyle was a sniper that killed people who were dangerous. They threatened peace and safety, and he did what he was ordered to do. If you want someone to blame, blame the people who gave those orders. People need to learn that he couldn’t deny orders from a superior. Some people can get named traitors of the country for denying orders. But do not blame a man who gave his heart and soul to his country for the safety of his people. I cannot believe that you all hate a man who did what he was trained to do. I am so fucking ashamed of all of you.

He is not a murderer, he is a hero.

Also, if you would all learn to be educated and read his fucking book, you would see his reasoning. Also, it’s not his fault for him trying to tell the truth and the government censoring some of it.

i am so honestly and genuinely surprised by some (not all) of the antics pulled by the turkish organization that orchestrated yesterday’s propaganda campaign in new york city. it’s surreal…and nonsensical. they took out a full page ad in the wall street journal (the major symbolism was in 3 hands dyed the colors of the russian, armenian, and turkish flags–the turkish hand was making a peace sign and the russian and armenian hands had their fingers crossed to symbolize lying) that denied the armenian genocide. they flew planes over the city that spelled out “FACT CHECK ARMENIA,” “TRUTH = TURKEY,” and, most disgustingly, “NE MUTLU TÜRKÜM DİYENE,” a phrase popular among turkish nationalists that means “HOW HAPPY IS THE ONE WHO SAYS ‘I AM A TURK’.” ne mutlu türküm diyene specifically has a long history–it was part of the pledge of allegiance all turkish students regardless of ethnicity were expected to say every day until recently, and is associated with anti-minority campaigns of assimilation, especially against kurds. they also organized some kind of hired flash mob with people in turkish flag t-shirts hopping around on pogo sticks and smiling wildly. then they had those dancers hold a giant turkish flag and stand in a moment of silence (for what, i have no idea).

anyway this is to say that turkish diaspora organizations are honestly repugnant. and also that, as targets of propaganda, it is your responsibility to stand in solidarity with armenians and against this historical revisionism that harms us–all of us.