Little Space is a confusing, sometimes chaotic place to be, mentally speaking. And it means that sometimes things you might recognize and be able to better verbalize when NOT in that headspace are sometimes more confusing, more of a general feeling instead of something you know how to say. As a result, here are some signs your little might be giving you that should help you understand or be aware that they might feel like they’re neglected, or at least that you aren’t engaging them in ‘little space’ and are just sort of ‘along for the ride’ (like when they want you to treat them little and you tell them ‘ok’ or something equally non-committal)
They whine without obvious reason It might sound like a whine, or generally unhappy sound, or it might be very specific to something you’ve heard before. Whatever the case, random, unexplained and poorly misunderstood whining is a good thing to note.
They want your attention, but seem angry or sad when they get it Usually a sign that they don’t feel you’re interacting properly, this almost always coincides with unexpected tantrums and general frustration. And it’s actually pretty reasonable… Imagine that you showed someone a thing REALLY important to you…your favorite movie, with favorite actor, while doing your favorite hobby/activity…and imagine they were texting and nodding and simply saying “OK” the whole time. That’s how this feels. And NOW you know why it upsets most littles. Probably almost ALL animals.
They go distant The thing is…most caregivers are intense, hard-working people with a LOT of love to give. And they’re STILL less loving and affectionate than most littles. So when your little suddenly changes, stops calling, texting, chatting, skyping, or cuddling…you either f***ed the heck up in some very specific way, or they feel ignored and no longer believe it matters. It’s ALSO completely possible they’re depressed, anxious, sad, tired, or just low on emotional/physical energy…but it’s always important to figure it out when someone (particularly your little) changes in personality and focus quickly or suddenly