Batfamily as things my family said on vacation

**Packing**
Stephanie: “Are my slutty heels at home?”
Barbara: “Which slutty ones? You have to be more specific.”

**Driving to the airport in a silent car at 3am**
Jason: “When I die, I hope it’s quickly. Like on impact.”
Dick: “I was thinking in my sleep, but okay.”

**Wheeling luggage through the crowded airport at 4am**
Tim: **half-asleep** “My shirt is inside out AND on backwards.

**After seeing a lot of children on their flight**
Jason: “Guess this flight is coming with a complimentary nap…chloroform.”

**Tim trying to figure out what direction their flying in**
Tim: **still half-asleep** “Where is Fort Lauderdale on a map?”
Bruce: “Above Miami” 
Tim: “Ohhh…where is Miami on a map?”

**On the cruise ship and looking out at the open ocean**
Jason: “Do you know what’s out there?”
All the kids in sync: “Megalodon.”

Damian: “We’re in international waters now, I could murder you and no one would find your body.”

Stephanie: **Near tears** “A part of me will always be on Saint Kitts.”
Cassandra: “For fuck’s sake, you lost your sunglasses in the ocean, not your virginity.”

Damian: “Islands that have two names attached to it—like Saint Kitts and Nevis or Turks and Caicos—the first one is always fantastic but the second one is always worthless.”
Jason: “Kind of like Jason and Damian.”
Damian: “International waters, Jason. Don’t push your luck.”

**Gazing down the side of the ship to the open ocean below**
Dick: “How deep do you think it is here?”
Tim: “How deep does the ship go?”
Bruce: “30 feet”
Tim: “At least 31 feet then”
Jason: **Sitting in a lawn chair drinking a strawberry daiquiri** “He ain’t wrong.” 
Barbara and Stephanie: **Cheers drink with Jason**

Stephanie: “How long do you think this ship is?”
Barbara: “At least fifteen Meglodons.”
Bruce: “What’s with this family and measuring things in Meglodons?”
Stephanie: “It’s scientifically accurate.”

**Jason coming back to the room after being missing for an hour**
Dick: “Where have you been? You said you were just going to the bathroom.”
Jason: **Holding two strawberry daiquiris** “I caught two employees hooking up in the theater bathroom so I decided to treat myself.” **Takes a sip from both straws at the same time**