VZWSupport

Lee: The larger issue I am having is upgrading my device. I have had unlimited data for years and each time I upgrade I am told I can’t keep it, but it’s my unlimited plan that keeps me with Verizon. I understand how great the Verizon coverage is, but living around a major city there are several companies that can offer me unlimited data

Richard: Ok so we did switch your password so it will now be —-, And as for upgrading your line, yes Im sorry to say but you will lose your unlimited data,

Lee: That will force me into leaving verizon at the end of my contract, unfortunately

Lee: thank you for your time

Richard: No problem Do you have any further questions or concerns I may assist you with?

Lee: do you have the number for at&t wireless?

Richard: No I’m Sorry I don?t have that Number.

When Companies Try to Share One Twitter Account to do Customer Support

User: “ARGH! Trying to do {thing} with Company X is soooo frustrating!”

CompanyXSupport: “@User Sorry you’re having trouble, We’re here to help! What’s the problem that you’re having? ^CS”

User: “@CompanyXSupport I tried to do {thing} and I used the instructions at http://your/web/site but it didn’t work and I don’t know what to try now!”

CompanyXSupport: “@User Sorry you’re having trouble, We’re here to help! Are you on Windows or an iPhone? ^SE”

User: “@CompanyXSupport I’m on a Mac!”

CompanyXSupport: “@User Sorry you’re having trouble, We’re here to help! What are you trying to do? ^YA”

User: “@CompanyXSupport I’m trying to do {thing}! I followed the instructions but it didn’t work!”

CompanyXSupport: “@User Sorry you’re having trouble, We’re here to help! The instructions for doing {thing} are at http://place/you/ve/already/looked”

User: “@CompanyXSupport Yes! That’s what I tried to do that didn’t work. What else can I do?”

CompanyXSupport: “@User We’re here to help! What’s the problem that you’re having? ^AP”

User: “@CompanyXSupport I’m trying to do {thing}! I followed the instructions but it didn’t work!”

I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve gone through this. The same pattern every time:

  1. Mention Company X (by name not @) on Twitter.
  2. Company X pays someone to monitor Twitter search for mentions of their company.
  3. Every @reply from Company X is “signed” by a different person (that’s the ^Initials at the end of the post).
  4. None of them seem to have any clue what previous people have suggested, and never seem to bother to check previous messages.
  5. They all pull phrases from the Big Book Of Customer Support Handbook.
  6. None of them actually bother to follow through and see if their suggestions were helpful.

I assume they are getting paid per reply, because the only thing you can be guaranteed to get is the “signature” at the end which must be used for tracking responses and getting paid.

The whole thing ends up being a complete waste of @User’s time, while @CompanyXSupport thinks they are doing a great job because their Social Media Team sends 4,000 messages per day.

For example, today Verizon’s Tech Support Team “tried” to help:

  1. Me: “Verizon doesn’t support IMAP? How is that even possible?”

  2. VZWSupport: “We do IMAP! What model device? What type of email account?”

  3. Me: “Setting up a friend’s iPad and everything said to use pop.verizon.net”

  4. Someone else from VZWSupport: “That link didn’t load. How can we assist you?” [HINT: READ THE BLOODY THREAD THUS FAR AND ACTUALLY RESPOND TO THE INFORMATION I HAVE ALREADY GIVEN YOU. Also, what app are they using which obviously didn’t translate the t.co version of pop.verizon.net to pop.verizon.net? Apparently they clicked on that link and it failed to load. WELL DUH.]

  5. Me: “Trying to setup IMAP on an iPad for someone with a Verizon dot net email address”

  6. Someone else from VZWSupport: “Staying connected via email is important! Here are the steps to add one: vz.to/1ilybwV ^MM” [That link will take you to generic information for how to add an email account to an iPad but has NOTHING WHATSOEVER to do with any Verizon-specific information]

Result? over the course of 2 hours, they sent me 3 @replies which have been, thus far, complete and utterly useless in actually trying to accomplish what I was trying to do.

Update: 2013-12-28 See followup post