Trevor Plouffe


Trevor Plouffe by Jock Strap

Trevor Plouffe: Conspiracy Solver

You might have thought Trevor Plouffe was just a somewhat interesting third baseman with a little bit of pop and the ability to crush lefthanders.

Well, you’re wrong. Just like we’ve been wrong about JFK’s murder for 50 years.

Beyond a mere baseballer, Plouffe is also one of the few people left on this Earth that’s willing to risk everything and peel back the curtain to expose the truth. 

Over the New Year’s holiday, Plouffe finally uncovered what really happened on that tragic November day in 1963: 

Thank you, Trevor. You’re the living embodiment of JFK’s quote, “Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country." 

Also, his ghost’s quote, "Avenge me!" 

Plouffe made one final tweet before 2014, saying: 

Since then, though, nothing. Plouffe’s Twitter timeline has gone dark.

Is Plouffe okay? Did his JFK tweets expose too much, forcing the government to ’re-educate’ him at Area 51?

Has the Bottled Water Alliance ‘silenced’ him? Did a piece of poisoned trail mix become lodged in his throat? 

Unfortunately, we may never know, for even if Plouffe returns to tweeting, there’s no way to be certain that he’s not just a robotic life model decoy.