Torture-Therapy

I respect the opinion of my elders, but just an open query about the charges brought against my generation:

For not working hard enough: where is the evidence. When we were younger you told us you started from a small job and climbed your way to the top. When we are flipping burgers it’s because we didn’t apply ourselves. When you did it, it was shouldering the future by suffering in the present. When we ask for the money to buy bread, it is shameful. When others went on strike in the name of labor conditions, it was heroic. When we ask for more, we never deserve it. So how did you get here? Did you never sit up and demand the world give you what was rightfully yours? How hard working is hard enough?

We are illerate, use slang instead of language, shun poetry: did I just imagine the “rad” bloom of the 70’s? Is it because you can’t catch our tongues in your hands? Is it because our poetry is now published beyond books, beyond the control of one voice, beyond you? That our language doesn’t need your approval to evolve? When you drew political pictures of us asking how to turn a book on, you laughed at our ignorance. When the tables turned, when we were shown to be the most literate and well-read generation on record, you scratched the mirror. You said it was our lazy nature. A body rotting. Because we read trash, or we read into things, or we write loudly and it bothers you. Why does it bother you?

School is too easy: What was it like going to school without being worried about a shooting? Did you ever cower like we have, like I did, like our friends, crying muffled in your hands because you love your parents and now have no time to tell them? What was it like, dear, in a world where my standardized testing scores would have broken your curve and I didn’t even get perfect. What part is the easy part. Is it the highest recorded level of anxiety? Is it the rising teenage suicide rates? Is it the eating disorders, body dismorphia, self harm, self destruction? Tell me, have you seen - there’s a show called “Are you Smarter Than A 5th Grader.” It’s very funny. In it, bright young kids show adults that what we’re learning didn’t even exist in common knowledge while they were in school. Tell me. If you were up against our 5th grade curriculum, who would win? No, I’m sure you’re fine. You learned it all in high school.

We want too many free things: What was it like to want for nothing? What was it like to have a certainty that hard work leads to a bright future. What was it like imagining being rich instead of imagining just being rich enough to eat good food. What was it like, not being worried that a broken leg would cost you an entire apartment? Do you know they hate us so much they would rather see us die than bring down the price of an EpiPen. And since I know you love the idea of us abusing the system, tell me, where do I go to expose the lie about my life-threatening allergy? How do I fake it, because I’d like to opt out of it, and while I’m at it my mental illness, and while I’m at it can you take my chronic pain please. And since I know that the answer is to go to school and get a degree so I can be worthy of not dying, just another question: are you aware fifty thousand dollars a year is equivalent to a house. I could buy a house instead of going to college. Since you’re good at this, while we’re talking, I have two siblings. Which of the three of us gets the money? Go on. Look at us. Choose. Who goes hungry?

We’re entitled: yes, please, give me a deed, give me land, give me better than winning the lottery. What I’m entitled to is life, liberty and the pursuit of profit, am I not? So where are any of the above? Where did the jobs go? Why do you jail people for small crimes but free the criminals? And my life? This life? I end where my body begins, I am cut off from the nation’s decisions about what I can put in or take out of me. And me? I’m safe because I’m white-passing. Don’t the bodies pile up? Aren’t we entitled to justice? Aren’t we entitled to an answer? A response from the government? More than just speeches about how riots won’t solve things? Aren’t we entitled to a fair trial? To freedom of speech? Was it not our common fathers who fought for these things?

We’re lazy: Where? Who has the money? I’ve been working since I was 12, am I just an anomaly? Or do you just ignore those who don’t fit your story? All those student-run engineering projects that are changing history. All those protests. The art world, shifting. All these adults who demand more - do they count as lazy or as entitled? What were you doing at our age? Did it really look all that different?

We don’t listen to real music, don’t like real art, are loud, are too busy partying: We changed and you didn’t keep up. Is that’s what’s so startling?

We are sucked up into the Internet, wouldn’t drop the phone if the apocalypse was happening: my phone has my family on the other end of it. Do you not save pictures from a burning building? Do you really care so little for others you’d stick to the old ways entirely instead of texting? Oh sure, yes, a letter is pretty, I love them. But just asking for a friend: What do I do in an emergency with only a pencil. And I don’t mean to downsize the problem because I mean it’s not like you took Polaroids of your friends at sunset - right? - and it’s definitely wrong of us to want memories of a really nice night, but, just curious, did you post that opinion on the Internet? Was seeing others on the Web what made you upset? Maybe - this is just a crazy idea that popped up into my head - you should go take a walk, go outside, disconnect.

We do everything different: Yes. Because we were raised on the cusp of the next great Renaissance. We are in somewhere new, a galaxy of expansion that doesn’t rely on you. That knows more than you do. That doesn’t function the way you expect it to. How rose-colored is the past to you? The place where you erase AIDS and drug abuse in an effort to tell us we are a terrible youth. Where you don’t talk about the marches that happened around you. How painted do you picture it, simply because you had to physically look in a book to learn something new? How do you turn your eyes to a world where war sits on our necks, our earth melts, our populations swell, our people starve, and we are powerless in it all - and say, “It’s your fault.”

It’s our fault. The housing market, somehow related to our obsessive need for safe spaces, I’m sure, because our dreams no longer lie in yards but rather something big enough for at least a bed, and hopefully with tasteful curtains, and you have no idea what a safe space is. The certain failure of the two-party political system, maybe somehow due to our political correctness - we are, after all, rude enough to never open doors for old ladies or just let you be racist - how we controlled the media, how our desires drove this. Our request for trigger warnings and correct pronouns is a burden, and I see that now, because our special snowflake syndrome really does hurt you as a person; while your ongoing use of torture in corrective therapy is only a problem if you’re actually looking. You’re so right about so many things. When you beat us to correct us, it’s your child and it’s your right; when it’s our bodies we ask to have rights over - well, what did we expect? It’s our fault. The crushing debt, the companies that own our government, the privatization of prisons, the unrightful searches, the human trafficking and abuse of sex workers, the gun violence, the pharmaceutical industries which control our doctor’s choices, the climate change you only just started to admit is happening, the extinction of species worldwide - we are responsible for both pollution and poaching, the lead in our water, the death in our streets. So what do you get from it? From dismissing us? From quitting on us before the race begins? From forgetting who exactly raised us kids?

Now, I was told that the problem is that we too often point to bigotry. That we hide behind pointing out your sexist comments instead of realizing the truth your words wrought. I was told we are so focused on our victories, of a world that rallied for marriage equality, for gender expression, for the safety of survivors, for a healing nation - we call out instead of calling on. So I’m calling on you, Generation X kids. Here’s your free one. No bigotry spoken of. So speak. Explain what exactly you mean.

I get it. We asked for a country. The land is borrowed from your children, they tell me.

Now why are you so afraid when we show up and start collecting?

3

Just a PSA….I went gif happy….like really gif happy. So just a warning. :)

The night was winding down to an end and despite feeling like you had drank way too much, you were still enjoying what was left of the night. Tony always knew how to throw a good party because at the end of the day, it was always the Avengers that stuck around the longest. Everyone had long since gone home to their nice, comfy beds and passed out from all the rich food and alcoholic beverages. 

You could feel your eyelids droop as Clint made a silly remark about the Mjolnir. Chuckling to yourself, you leaned your body back on the couch, letting everything you’ve consumed get the best of you.

Steve leaned towards you, concern washing over his face. “You feeling okay?” His voice was low to keep from anyone else to hear. 

Smiling, you nodded your head. “I’m fine, just a little light headed.” You had a soft spot for Steve and you weren’t sure if you actually truly liked him or if it was because he was the one who had found and saved you. It had been awhile since he had rescued you from HYDRA. You were brainwashed as well but not nearly as long as his friend had, you knew very little information about The Winter Soldier. He was supposed to be a ghost but you vaguely remembered working on a few missions with him. 

It was all blurry, the memories of HYDRA. All you really could remember was the torturous electroshock therapy you had to go through to build into your body the intense physical training you endured. It was still strange to you that you could essentially pick up any kind of gun and have such precision. You hardly ever missed your target, similar to Clint with his arrows. It was a tough road piecing together everything about yourself and despite wanting to scream and shut yourself out from the world, Steve was there to guide you from it. 

He always made a point to ask how your day was going even if he was beaten head to toe with bruises and cuts from a mission. You were still on a pardon, only being used if they absolutely needed you. It was driving you crazy but you understood, Steve didn’t want to risk you choking in a fight and losing your life because you weren’t ready. You don’t know how many times you had argued with him but he was firm on getting the all clear and even then he would need to be reassured himself that you were ready.

“Do you need to go home? I can take you, if you’d like.” Steve smiled, “I don’t mind.” 

You tried to fight back a blush but you knew it surfaced by the look on Steve’s face. He turned shyly away and you sighed. “It’s alright. I’m sure I can wait the few hours out.” 

About to respond, he was called up to try his hand at the Mjolnir. Watching him, you chuckled as you took a breath and gripped the handle. You swore you saw it budge, your eyes snapped up Thor’s who wore a look of worry. With your mouth hanging open slightly, you returned to a smile once Steve couldn’t make it move again. Thor seemed quite pleased with the result and settled back into his normal gloat. 

You weren’t positive if you were just being hyper-aware of Steve’s presence but you were pretty darn sure that when he sat down, he sat closer than he was prior. You sipped on the room temperature wine that you had been nursing for the last two hours to prevent him from seeing your pink cheeks again. Every now and again, you’d peek through your hair and find him looking at you which would prompt your face to flush all over again. 

“[Y/N]! Your turn!”

Keep reading

“Ofglen had urges that led her to do unnatural things. I’m sure, to her, it felt like love. In cases such as these, the punishment is death. But, out of respect for her position, we let her live. We’re not without compassion.”

“What did you do to her?”

“We saved her. We had a doctor take care of the problem. It’s such a small problem, truth be told.”

There are many moments in the theocratic-fascist dystopian future setting of Margaret Atwood’s The Handmaid’s Tale in which characters use certain words or phrases from today in a way that’s clearly meant to show how not-so-implausible and not-so-far-off that future is.

We as readers are encouraged to reflect on how many people there are in the real world, right now, who think the way that the people in the novel’s fictional universe do.

The character Serena Joy’s remark about returning to “traditional values” is an oft-cited example of this.

Hulu’s miniseries adaptation of the novel adds quite a few of these. The quote above is the one that has stuck with me the most, partially because of its use of the word “unnatural” and the phrase “I’m sure, to her, it felt like love,” but especially because of its use of the word “compassion.”

When someone does something cruel and harmful to someone else, any empathetic person with a conscience will presumably be bothered by it.

But when someone does something cruel and harmful to someone else while saying that they’re doing it out of compassion, that’s especially disturbing.

This is a general principle that can apply to a variety of situations—people usually want to think of themselves as good people who are doing the right thing, even when they’re committing atrocities—but it’s especially common among fundamentalist evangelicals, specifically when they’re talking about LGBTQ people and even more specifically when they’re talking about conversion/reparative/ex-gay “therapy.”

The fact that the subject of the conversation quoted above is a lesbian who was the victim of genital mutilation on the part of a fundamentalist christian theocracy with the intention of ameliorating her “urges” is not, I don’t think, a coincidence.

In the same way that the Commander tries to justify the genital mutilation of Emily (“Ofglen”) as an act of compassion, evangelicals across America have put their children through the abusive psychological and spiritual torture that is conversion “therapy” and also tried to justify that as compassionate.

In both cases, the perpetrators believe that same-gender attraction and relationships are a kind of immoral illness and that the only way to be a happy and morally good person is to be heterosexual, so they conclude that whatever torture, abuse, and trauma has to be endured to supposedly get to that end goal is worth it.

More broadly, fundamentalist evangelicals believe that they can say and do all kinds of awful things to people, so long as those things are said or done with the end goal of converting those people and getting them into heaven. To them, the ends justify the means.

So you end up with this sort of shallow, meaningless pseudo-compassion.

Think of how many times you’ve heard an evangelical say, “It’s not that I hate them. I have compassion for the homosexuals. But…”

There’s always a but.

“It’s because I love gay people that I tell them that a fundamental part of who they are and how they experience love is inherently disgusting and immoral. My heart breaks for them, really. Can’t you tell how much I care about those depraved perverts?”

Ultimately, no matter how hard you try to get around it, no matter what your personal feelings are about it, the belief that someone is lesser-than, defective, or ill—that there’s something inherently wrong with them—will eventually lead to oppression and violence against them. Always, without fail.

And that isn’t some sort of abstract hypothetical. It happens in the real world every day. That’s one of the reasons why The Handmaid’s Tale is so disturbing.

The addition of Emily’s sexual orientation and subsequent “punishment” made it even more so.

It was one of the few examples I can think of in which such an addition improved a story rather than cheapening or detracting from it.

Book-to-film/television adaptations are often rightly derided for having ruined their stories with unnecessary changes. That is not the case here.

anonymous asked:

So what about a role swap doctor and feng switch places

i went ham on Feng bc i love her ok and i also wanted to do killer feng for a while but couldn’t think of anything until now

I based her off of ‘Nü gui’, a type of Chinese ghost. Idk exactly waht she’d do but for now lets say she just slaps the shit out of ppl with her ghost-hand or smth

And Herman,  therapist who jumped ship when the FBI tried to turn him into a shock-therapy torture specialist and had to go into hiding.

zoeycupcakes-deactivated2017091  asked:

Yo, I need to give some advice to the youngens. If your parents are showing signs of being homophobic, transphobic, or acephobic, please don't come out. I know hidding hurts, but so does being homeless, beat, or sent to torture "therapy" I know you think your parents love you and would never hurt you, but lots of kids thought that before they came out too. They adore you like something they own. They'll throw you away when you displease their God and claim it's to save your soul.

This is something I agree with.

Please be safe. being in the closet, as painful as it is, is better than being rejected or even thrown out.

-Witch

Atomic Prejudice

Not about nuclear power! This post is about ‘staying in your lane’, various forms of prejudice such as racism, ableism, homophobia, etc. Content warning for discussion of torture as 'therapy’, medical scary stuff, mention of rape and other non-con .

I have a lot to say about 'staying in your lane’, but first I want to talk a bit about the Judge Rotenberg Center.

The Judge Rotenberg Center is an infamous residential facility for developmentally disabled individuals. The primary source of its infamy is its use of skin shock 'adversives’ (not to be confused with Electroconvulsive Therapy, where electrical shocks are used to deliberately induce a seizure for therapeutic reasons. Which does apparently somehow manage to work not-uncommonly. It is of course still labeled a Class III 'High Risk’ treatment by the FDA as it IS delivering shocks with the deliberate intent to induce seizures. But things that would be very bad in an uncontrolled environment can still be helpful medically-heart surgery is good even though one would not usually want someone cutting open one’s chest). Autism Speaks got a lot of hate for endorsing the JRC, though to their credit they have since renounced and publicly condemned it (Autism Speaks remains bad. The JRC is simply bad enough that even Autism Speaks condemns it).

I have autism. Because of this, I know what it is like to face some of the various things that autistic people face. To use a common way of phrasing, my condemning the JRC has me 'in my lane’. I have never been tortured the way JRC tortures its residents. I have however had people attempt to alter my behavior in unpleasant ways due to my autism, so this does give me some knowledge though. But here is the thing-a lot of LGBT individuals are currently worrying a lot about electroshock 'therapy’. If they have enough experience from their life to be able to understand the badness of that, then it does not seem difficult for me to say “Imagine that, but rather than trying to eradicate your homosexuality/bisexuality/transgenderness/etc they are trying to eradicate an even bigger and harder to hide part of yourself.”. This explanation doesn’t completely communicate my understanding-'harder to hide’ isn’t very clear, I’m not sure exactly how to communicate the sensation of trying to suppress something like flapping in excitement, though I could try and possibly communicate more (“Imagine a world where people consider smiling disgusting” might be worth trying)

Rather more interestingly though, I’m still only extrapolating how bad such a thing would be-as stated I’ve never experienced it. Some nonautistic, in fact not mentally disabled at all people have however. It is entirely possible that some of them are better at extrapolating the details of how the torture interacts with autism than I am at extrapolating the torture, in which case they would in fact understand this component of autism oppression better than I do.

Most people reading this however, have hopefully not been tortured with electroshock therapy. But we can still extrapolate-if you have ever had someone hurt you, or even just suffered pain at all, that gives you at least a start. The more distant your experience is the harder it will be, requiring more explanation and/or effort. Possibly too hard to overcome-I admit if you have no experience with pain at all I am at a loss for how to start other than saying “Mary’s Room” and perhaps talking about utility functions. This is a difference of quality, not a difference of kind however.

So I say to you feel free to speak out against torturing mentally disabled people with electric shocks! And that you almost certainly didn’t need an autistic person to confirm that such a thing is bad-I’m pretty confident you could have figured that out on your own.

Now, back to the original topic (not that we ever truly left it)! Perhaps some of you are wondering about the title-'Atomic Prejudice’? Well, our word atomic comes from the Latin word 'atomus’, meaning 'indivisable’ (Spoiler alert: This was kinda awkward when it turned out we could totally divide them, and they in fact divide often in nature). Prejudice is not atomic-it has parts (just like atoms!). The prejudice I face as an autistic person divides into a variety of different parts-mockery for the way I speak and displeasure at my expressions of joy for two examples. Other people face similar things for different reasons-the details and reasons might change-perhaps they have a stutter, or face mockery for their accent. Some details might matter more, others less, and some barely at all. Regardless, prejudice is not atomic-it has parts and those parts can resemble parts of other prejudices.

There is, however, an attitude I’ve seen which stands in opposition to this view-an insistence that prejudice cannot be dissected or examined. One such example is here. A few choice quotes:

Two unalike things that have different discourses that can’t be compared because they are just… Different

In a world where [the bigotry and angry signs were identical] they still can’t be compared

You can’t compare them

And the most problematic quote:

if you aren’t POC you haven’t experienced racism therefore you cannot accurately describe what is racist and why it’s bad other than the fact it’s… Bad

Really? That sounds like EXCELLENT news. After all, I’m autistic-I’ve had speeches from my mother about how to stay safe and not offend cops. Since I can therefore describe that, I guess black people must not have to worry about anything remotely similar to that! Call the presses! Black Lives Matter can go home! Non-POC have experienced poverty and can accurately describe that-I guess racist economic oppression must be gone! Hurrah!

Or, ya know, no.

Sure, my experience with speeches from my mother about how to be safe around cops probably aren’t identical to any speech a black person has received. I doubt most of their speeches are identical either though, unless their mom’s are passing a script around. What level of 'accurately describe’ is being talked about here? The point where one can quote it word for word? I have a terrible memory-I couldn’t quote any of the speeches my mom gave me word for word. Or perhaps it is a matter of degree, in which case I suggest one first imagines what sort of ratio between autistic risk and black risk would justify one’s view, and then go look up the statistics-what if the autistic risk increase is 10% of the black risk increase? 50%? 80%? What if they are equal? What if the autistic risk is higher? And ask yourself-where did such a number possibly come from?

While I was doing research for this post, I came across a post that I don’t think I’ll link (due to the nature of the content), but shall attempt to describe, where someone talked about the statement “don’t compare anything to rape”, and how they felt very awkward about it because their PTSD was caused by a medical incident where they felt their consent was messed up in some weird ways, their body was violated, and afterward they felt ruined sexually. They referred to it as “their rape” because it was the only word they could come up with to explain the sensation, and when they got into feminism the sensation was that it was trying to steal the only name they had for the way they were violated. Now, I get nitpicky 'you should use language in a formal and precise manner!’ feels. And full disclosure, that did pop up as I read the post. I promptly squashed it. I *really* care about people communicating precisely. And if I thought I was up to navigating such an emotional minefield I might try to help someone work out a more exact description (I do not think I could achieve such a thing). But they were trying to understand and communicate and work through something terrible. That is VERY important, but trying to make things ‘atomically’ bad blocks that. 

So the ‘atomic’ view of prejudice often just seems nonsensical, if taken literally dismisses real problems people face, hampers recovery from trauma, interferes with communication and the ability to bond with others. Anything else?

Well, the way I’ve generally seen it used also often seems rather dishonest and aggressive. If people can’t examine prejudice at all, then they are forced to simply take your word, and as a result your orders. You can use it like a weapon people to bludgeon them into obeying, or harm those you hate. I think a lot of people are ‘hardening’ the concept to try to seal themselves off from a world that is hurting them, but others are ‘hardening’ the concept into a metaphorical club they can use to intimidate and whack people. 

And that is no good. Besides the immediate harms they can achieve using the weaponized concept, bit by bit they make it harder for people to reason and comprehend and communicate and ally. A weapon whose very construction alone scars the cognitive and social landscape, even without its use.

The some other effects of suppression of comprehension vary, especially when there is disagreement-since if you can’t understand something except through someone else, what do you do when they disagree? This can be disorienting, though occasionally amusing. It can also worsen in-group conflicts, since if the only way anyone outside can know is through your group, and your group must have all the knowledge, even an innocent disagreement must publicly turn into an attempt to claim the other person is faking their membership. 

Now, of course checking your views with other people is important-I have one or more people look at almost every big post I write (I am far better at theory than practice, and so I especially worry that I may be completely missing something. Remarkably often the response has been along the lines of 'Oh, huh, that is a good theoretical description of what happened during [X]. Good job’ ‘During what? Never heard of it. Wasn’t even sure if something like this ever happened. Well, good to know’). The wonderful @alarajrogers and her ability to give long and informative rants on LGBT history, feminism history, fandom history, and probably some other kinds of history I haven’t asked about yet has been a great source of information (Plus she writes good fanfic). Even for autistic issues I prefer to check-checking is just generally a good idea.

However, as long as you are willing to have honest and productive discussion, I welcome you into my ‘lane’. I doubt you will be able to prove yourself a master of choosing fidgets if you aren’t autistic/adhd/whatever other brain things cause that, but even the ‘native’ occupants don’t know everything, and they can still try to help.

As for examples on the opposite end of the spectrum, I offer this by the wise, insightful, and kind @theunitofcaring who manages to describe view of prejudice where the ‘outer casing’ is transparent and every mechanism laid bare, this by the amusing, kind, and well dressed @funereal-disease who brings up additional psychological issues that I confess I cannot personally relate to or very well validate, as my psychology is decidedly based around theory and principle. They are both awesome people.

Do I… why do I do this to myself. 

Imagine Steve’s found, but not by shield, not by hydra, not by anyone even remotely notable in the long run or even the short run. He’s found by a small independent party that is ecstatic to have Captain America in their grimy little hands: all of that strength, all of that power, would certainly give them a boost up to where they belong. 

However, knowing Steve’s strong morals they know they have to break him first. Hence the torture: the electroshock therapy, the obedience conditioning, the degradation…

What’s left of Steve is a husked out shell that may or may not be wacked in the head. And when I say wacked, I mean completely cuckoo. Just imagine a male Harley Quinn with a prominent Old Brooklyn accent. 

But basically, Steve becoming a decorative ornament slash bodyguard to one of the largest mob bosses of New York. And no one notices for the longest time.

[more]

Pain in the Ass - Joker x Reader imagine

(gif credit goes to whoever made it)

{A/N} I had such a hard time making this “imagine” length, I wanted to draw it out further! I hope ya like it my lovely anonymous reader!
P.S. I’m still working on everyones requests and Play the Ace, I just thought I’d make that known. :)
xo


Prompt: Can i request a joker imagine with this prompt?  "You’re never really ever going to love me are you?“ “I’m nothing to you, always have been, always will be.”

Warnings: Cursing.
Masterlist

Imagine the Joker standing outside of your cell at Belle Reve.
You helped him on a dangerous heist- the usual Friday night for the two of you, but this time things went awry. When Batman showed up to ‘take out the trash,’ your beloved Mistah J left you to the wolves bats.

“You’re never really ever going to love me are you? I’m nothing to you, always have been, always will be,” you spit through the cold iron bars you’re clutching. This time, the harshness of tone is coming from you, and it couldn’t feel more satisfying.

Your hair is a mess and the bags under your eyes have been defined and darkened a bit more from the stress you’ve been under. Your hands are rough and covered in flakes from the faint rust encrusted on the bars you try to get out of daily.

He’s let you stay here for a few weeks now, enduring torture and electric shock therapy of all kinds as “routine, since you’re just whacked too far the fuck out anyway,” they tell you. You can’t help but be bitter at the thought of knowing he knows exactly what’s happening to you and still didn’t come to help you bust out.
He’s sent you inside messages, saying he’ll “be there tonight,” but tonight after tonight came around, and he was nowhere to be seen.

His stare is haunting, and you can see the anger rising in his body as he balls one hand into a fist. He quickly releases it, stretching out his fingers and cracking his neck. You don’t give him time to calculate the sarcastic response you expect from him before you raise your voice. What did it matter now? You were just as safe behind these bars as you were in danger.

“You keep me toting along side of you, for what?! A distraction for you to get away when shit gets tough!”

You’re too angry to think about the fact that by now someone should’ve heard you, or even seen him.

“Remember the one and only time you told me you love me…” you roll your neck slightly, cocking your head back and to the side as your hair falls around your face with a demented, disappointed smile. You grip harder onto the bars, your knuckles turning white, “You love me, you love me, you love me.. Bullshit!”

His eyes stay locked on yours, and his silence already speaks volumes for what could possibly be in the cards for you if you ever did manage to break out of this hell hole on your own. You notice his eyes travel past you and he nods once. An abrupt large explosion on the other side of your cell causes you to lurch forward into the bars as you brace yourself amidst the now flying debris.

When the smoke clears enough so you can see in front of you, The Jokers gone.

You turn around hastily, throwing your arms at your sides. Fueled on rage again, your inhale to scream at the top of your lungs, but a pair of hands catch your shoulders tightly and a rough kiss is planted onto your lipstick-less lips. You shake your head once your lips part from each others and open your {E/C} eyes. There is he is, staring back at you with a condescending red grin.

Such a pain in the ass, {Y/N}, I did not miss that..” he growls as he grabs your hand and starts running, dragging you behind him through the rubble and out of the cell. You can’t help but roll your eyes and let a smirk slide across your features as you trail behind him out of the prison.

Tags: @russianintothings

Avoiding the Apocalypse pt 13: In Captivity

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Warnings: signs of struggling, sad reader, coercion, mention of masturbation, mention of electro-shock therapy, just really dark stuff guys. 

Word Count: 1.4k

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The next few days, Jamie visited you and brought you food. She didn’t say much and refused to listen to your pleas. She only told you that she was getting closer and closer to finding out where the safe house was. Oddly enough, she never interrogated you on the whereabouts of your teammates. Weeks passed…or at least it felt like weeks…you never really knew because all you did was stay inside your room. You wanted to break out but you couldn’t do anything. Your hands were literally tied. In fact, you started to feel numb. You sat on the edge of your bed and stared at the olive green wall opposite from you. Suddenly you heard the door open. You looked to see that Jamie had entered and a group of HYDRA agents followed.

“I brought you some food,” she explained. The men placed a table on the opposite side of your bed and soon chairs were added. A hot plate was then placed on top of the table.

“I’d love to eat, but my hands seem to be tied,” you snarked.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

who "founded" the lgbt community? ive heard it was black trans women but i want to make sure and sorry for bothering you

no problem. when ppl talk about who founded the community. they usually are refering to Stonewall. which was the start of the modern fight for lgbt rights and equality in the US.

stonewall was a gay bar that got raided by police. and they took all the ppl dressed as women to “check their sex”. and any woman who didn’t have the socially-mandated ‘correct’ genitals for a woman was arrested by the police. so then riots followed. for a few days.

Sylvia Rivera (a bi trans woman) and Martha P Johnson (a trans woc) were some of the bigger figures in the riots. another notable person was Stormé DeLarverie (a butch lesbian woc) who during the riots escaped from the police wagon multiple times and physically fought 4 police officer while in handcuffs.

the riots sparked many other people to rise up against violence (mostly against gay and lesbian ppl bc trans was illegal basically) and formed groups and with the slogan “d*kes bash back” to literally fight back against the police violence against lesbian and gay ppl. (unfortunately around this time terf idealogy started getting popular. and many ppl saw trans women as ‘transvestites’ and not really women. conversion therapy, aka torture, also became popular following the riots)

the stonewall inn riots were the single most important event that sparked the lgbt fight for rights in the us. with in two years after the riots there was a major lgbt group in every major city in the us.

some ppl call the stonewall riots “the shot heard around the world” for the lgbt movement. before everything was kept in secrecy and shame. and stonewall was the call to arms.

if there was never stonewall riots. there never would have been any of the rights and visibility lgbt people have today in the us.

The Sharp Pain Of Your Absence

You talk about acupuncture
like it really is a form of therapy,
but it actually feels like torture.

You don’t drive knives 
in between my ribs
like they do in the big poems, no,
but you slip in pins
and drive needles into me
that were always just syringes
and suspension.

The tragedy lies in
how my lungs have slits
for your fingernails
because I know you slip your crime,
grime,
filth,
and dirt in 
when you dig into me.
Even though your nails are pristine.

It is painful to know I exhale
but can never spit you out
because you
and your effect are something quite severe
and addicting.

You hang yourself like a tapestry
above my bed at dusk
for protection in deep darkness
and in return,
I stand strong like an electric fence
waiting for your heart
to rumble
and blacken. 

You cause me incredible agony
because you caused me to care.

You caused me to care
all while fearing that you don’t.

anonymous asked:

So my MC is gay and her pastor father subjected her to conversion therapy, focusing most of his efforts on behavioral modification therapy with electrical shocks, from the ages of about 13-18. In my book she's currently 26. Would she still be experiencing adverse effects from the 'therapy'? Like not being able to stand when someone of the same sex touches her? Obviously she'd still be traumatized but everything I've seen about behavioral modification therapy has been in relation to someone(1/2)

(2/2)quitting smoking or getting the to stop drinking and they say it stops being effective when the therapy stops. I’m assuming it would be, and I feel horrible saying this, more effective if someone is subjected to it against their will and relatively young. Also would she be touch averse to everyone and not just women? I’m thinking she’d have issues being around older men since it was her father who caused her such pain but I’m not sure how server the those issues would be.

———-

Would she be still experiencing adverse effects? Almost definitely.

People who have gone through conversion therapy are more likely to commit suicide. More likely to do drugs. More likely to be depressed. Even at a higher risk for HIV and other STDS.

Would she have issues with people of the same sex touching her? She’s very likely to have issues with absolutely *anyone* touching her.

Would she struggle with older men? She might struggle with being near anyone. When someone is abused for their sexual orientation and lives in a society that is heterosexist? Where they never know who might share their abuser’s views? That’s a whole lot of fear and doubt about everyone.

Make no doubt about it, conversion therapy is torture and abuse. But it doesn’t actually change who someone is. As @scripttorture can tell ya, torture doesn’t usually accomplish anything beyond traumatizing the person and getting the torturer off/giving them release (not necessarily a sexual off- but… you know what I mean.)

Read this article about someone sharing their story. Warning, Trump and Pence get brought up as well.

A fair deal of conversion therapy happens against people’s will. A fair deal of it involves minors.

Abuse due to sexual orientation can cause self-hate. Might keep them from ever having sex, might make them force themselves to fuck the opposite sex, might cause them to self-harm when they have urges, might cause them to abstain entirely.

She might retreat when exposed to Pro-Gay material. Might not know what to deal with the trauma response it causes.

She might seek refuge with them but be awkward, like a child growing into their body.

She will almost definitely struggle with her identity and herself and feeling impure and gross and unworthy.

Hopefully that helps a bit,

TS

Well

I’m on vacation this week. I had big plans about getting some paperwork caught up, some trim replaced and painted on the outside of the house., and some landscape cleanup.
Then my mom fell Saturday morning at home. K and I got her to ER, where they did a CAT scan and X-rays, put three staples in the gash in the back of her head, bandaged the big scrapes on her forearm and knee, and finally admitted her at 7:30 because she was so, so weak.
The long weekend was an education in Medicare coverage, VA benefits (she’s a military widow,) the local rehab options, and how incredibly nice the night shift nursing staff on Summit’s 7th floor can be.
Today was further education on the reluctance of banks to share information about accounts that don’t have your name on them, and a terribly interesting meeting with a lawyer about the process (and price) of obtaining conservator status after a dementia diagnosis.
Now we’re at the nearest rehab/nursing home, conveniently right over the hill from our house, telling her again where she is and what she has to do to go home again - cooperate with the physical therapy torture-mistress until she feels steady using her walker.
She’s still pretty weak and more than a little puzzled and aggravated about not being at home, but she’s hugely improved since Saturday. And much happier since she got barbecue and cake for dinner.

A bit about what Garak and Andy really mean to me.

I was just thinking about how much Garak means to me as a queer person because he’s a queer character and how grateful I am that Andy has kept being insistent all these years upon Garak being pansexual even when corporate people were pushing against it. I wanted to talk about how I see Garak as a positive role model–which is probably fucking weird as hell since he is a spy, assassin, torturer, and a number of other ‘nasty’ things.

But there are so few queer characters, and Garak is strong, clever, intelligent, witty, loyal, creative, and unashamed of himself as far as his sexuality and gender expressions go. Garak is portrayed at times as effeminate, and yet he will fucking kill you, okay? It’s so powerful and awesome that Garak embodies BOTH these things. I mean we live in a culture where strength = masculinity, and effeminate men are portrayed as being ‘weak’ which ties right into women being portray as ‘weak’ too. Garak says fuck that shit I am a badass, and I can also make you a lovely cocktail dress that will turn all the heads, and either way I will blow your fucking mind.

I was thinking about how Garak must deal with claustrophobia, crippling anxiety, addiction, and probably depression too though that’s not as explicitly indicated in the show. But no doubt he has felt that in being an exile–he felt so bad that he turned on his wire just to escape and to deal with his life. Garak has many emotional problems, but he stays alive. He keeps fighting. He keeps doing his thing. He is an outsider on this station full of people who are not like him, full of people who hate him, full of people who’d probably rather see him dead–and if that doesn’t sound like the shit that is going on in the U.S. regarding the LGBT community and other minority groups, I don’t know what does. Many of us live in this place where we feel like we are lost, unwanted, feared, loathed, treated as people who are disgusting, wrong, and undeserving of a happy and productive life. A lot of us in the LGBT community feel like outsiders, like exiles in our own world. But Garak keeps moving on. Not only that, but at the end of things, he gets to go home again.

His home is destroyed by war, but he does get to go home. He gets to find his place again. There is still some bit of hope there even though so much bad has happened. To me… that kind of gives me hope that maybe I will find my place one day too.

I just love Garak so much, and there are so many reasons why, but these reasons are deep and personal. I think there are a lot of other people who understand this too. Garak does seem to be a favorite among queer folks in this fandom and the reasons are obvious.

I’m so thankful that Andy made the choices he did, was bold enough and brave enough to say, ‘fuck it I’m going to do this’, has been consistent through the years in insisting that Garak is queer, and that he portrayed this amazing, complex, character who faces so many obstacles but he keeps on going and living even if it’s only out of spite, or instinct, or whatever.

After the election, there were tons of helplines and suicide prevention numbers all over my facebook feed because people in the LGBTQIA community were so terrified. We still are. Our country has elected a man whose platform would see our marriages ended, our rights taken away, our people forced into torturous conversion therapy, and hormone therapy ended for those who are transgender or nonbinary. My best friend was very upset over the election and at one point I told her–we must keep fighting. Garak and Damar wouldn’t give up. I was thinking about them huddled down in the basement while outside Cardassia is being destroyed by their enemies, about them facing the Jem’Hadar, Garak charging forward screaming FOR CARDASSIA. Later she told me that it was ‘silly’ but that telling her that they would not give up had helped her find a source from which to draw strength.

Sometimes shows are just shows, stories are just stories, and characters are just characters.

But sometimes they are so much more than that.

I hope that Andy really knows how much he is appreciated, and how much of an impact he has had on some of us. A lot of us have few people who stand by our side. It is good to know that on a fictional space station there is this guy with scales and a well-tailored tunic who would sit down with us at lunch and tell us that we are okay.

adminover20  asked:

What is the BLI's thoughts on conversion therapy, using torture to turn a homosexual, bisexual, etc. into a heterosexual?

Conversion therapy is banned from sectors in Battery City and all areas in the zones under BLI authority. We at Better Living Industries believe fully in firmly in the safety of all citizens, regardless of sexual orientation. Our official statement is that sexual orientation should not be used as grounds for any discriminatory speech or actions. No special treatment is allotted to heterosexual members of our community, and no harmful treatment is tolerated when committed because of sexual orientation. Punishment for discriminatory practices range from fines to prison sentences. Those who attempt to use conversion therapy methods to ‘change’ an individual’s sexual orientation or identity will have to pay fines of up to 500,000c, and serve a prison sentence ranging from twenty five years to life depending on the severity of the offense. Opinions of the individual concerning punishment and compensation will be considered by BLI. 

Thank you for your inquiry, and have a better day!

2

Imagine being the tattoo artist that does Harley and Joker’s tattoos. You were only 10 years old when you started doing Joker’s tattoos and you gave Harley all of hers when her and Joker got together.

As the King and Queen of Gotham, nobody messed with them. But when word got out that a high school girl was aquainted with them, you became a prime target to indirectly harm Joker and Harley. They didn’t know something was amiss till Harley wanted a new tattoo on her arm that said “Puddin’ Lover.” Neither of them could get in touch with you and Joker became enraged, thinking that you were directly insulting Harley by ignoring them. It wasn’t until Joker sent out his right hand man to bring you to them that they found out where you were.

You had been unwillingly taken to Arkham Asylum under a false alias. You were forced under torturous treatment. Electric shock therapy. Solitary comfinement. Disgusting foods. Unjust food portions. Guards harassed you. And your mind was slipping into an insanity that you hadn’t thought possible. You saw everything in red, black, and white colors. The voices you heard were disoriented and echoed in your head. You were losing your mind. You were losing yourself. You were no longer the honor student on her way to a good future with a selection of ivy league schools. You were demented. You were driven to hatred of everything. You began attacking your guards and doctors. You started to become the false alias you were admitted as. Your doctor’s began injecting you with glowing substances and liquids. You were no longer just a patient, now you were an experiment.

It took a few weeks for Harley and Joker to find a way to get you out of Arkham Asylum. They simply wanted their tattoo artist back. But they got more than they expected. When they got you out, they were the only one’s you didn’t want to kill at all. You were only devoted to them and you entrusted them by showing your power. You could go into the minds of others and through their memories. You could rip apart their minds from the inside, driving them to desperation. If you could really focus, you were capable of sending one’s bidy into paralysis just by hitting them.

You were Harley and Joker’s new toy. Their new favorite at that. You weren’t just their tattoo artist anymore, you were their bodyguard, accomplice, and trustee.

anonymous asked:

conversion therapy involves torture. electroshock therapy, exposure to hot/cold thing and other physical sensory punishments. it isnt just a doctor testing you for a hormone problem to see if thats the root of an issue. it isnt someone telling you "thats made up" or "youll change your mind" or "but what about marriage/kids/etc?" it is the actual torture of gay, bi and pan men and women.

Buddy pal anon dude… I know that. I know the historical torture involved. I’m gay and trans I’ve been very well aware of this. But when I say aces also go through conversion therapy I do not mean just being tested for hormonal changes or asked if they are sure.

I’m talking about doctors forcibly giving ace patients medicines to up their libido, changing much needed medications because that “might be why they are ace”. I’m talking about doctors misdiagnosing psychosis and sexually assaulting their patients to try to fix them while also making it harder to believe them about their abuse. Please don’t act like I’m minimalizing the pain that conversion therapy has caused LGBT+ people because you want to ignore the pain asexuals have to go through

Remember that time that the Joker and Harley kidnapped Robin and tortured him with shock therapy and serums until his mind snapped and he became Joker Jr and Batman and Batgirl tried to save him and then Robin ended up shooting the Joker and killing him while laugh-crying and Barb just held him saying “it’s okay, Tim. you’re okay” over and over again while he sobbed?

Cause I do.

anonymous asked:

whats wrong with the asexual post?



For the sake of simplicity, I’m going to explain using the old “punch up” vs “punch down” principle of comedy and satire.

Basically, punching up means your comedy makes the more powerful party uncomfortable and punching down makes the less powerful party uncomfortable. 

This is why we can watch a movie about children beating up adults and it’s a family friendly comedy, but a movie about an adult who harms children is a disturbing drama, horror, or tragedy.

There could be a movie about an adult hurting children played for laughs, but it would be perceived as offensive by a lot of people (myself included) because it’s abuse-apologist. 

The difference is that children are in a position of lesser power in comparison with adults, and often are actually, in real life harmed by adults who abuse that position of power. So reversing the every-day reality of that power dynamic relieves stress and can be funny, and it makes children feel good, because it’s empowering! But laughing at adults hurting children is just laughing at real world systems of power that traumatize countless people and it’s just.. not funny to me at all. 

The rule of thumb is that to write successful, non-offensive comedy, you always make sure your jokes punch up. 

So with that principle in mind, we can look at the post. 

[Image description: a post made by zupakid that says “Being asexual is great bc you only have to worry about 6 out of 7 deadly sins. That’s like almost 15% less sin”.]

On the surface, there’s nothing too wrong with it. It’s taking two unrelated concepts and connecting them in an ironic and surprising way, which is the baseline of comedy. 

But, applying the punch-up/punch-down principle, it’s important to look at the larger cultural context of the elements the joke is drawing on. 

The 7 deadly sins is an idea thoroughly intertwined in Christian ideology. They aren’t actually a part of the 10 Commandments, but most people in Christian-majority Western countries will very quickly associate them with that faith context. 

The history of these ‘7 deadly sins’ has largely been used to hurt marginalized groups. All of them are pretty normal human experiences that almost everyone will have sometime. Pride. Envy. Wrath, Gluttony, Lust, Sloth, and Greed. These are natural feelings that can lead to hurtful actions but the experiences aren’t inherently anything. And because literally anyone could be accused of these things, it’s a very effective tool for describing any marginalized person as ‘sinful’ or immoral in some way. 

(Think about anti-Semitic people assigning ‘greed’ as a character trait to Jewish people, think about fat-phobic people assigning ‘gluttony’ as a character trait to fat people, think about ableist people assigning ‘sloth’ to neuroatypical people, so on and so forth.) 

These attributes aren’t just a harmless trope, they’re much more deeply entrenched in our cultural belief systems than many of us want to admit. 

And when we look at “lust” as a character attribute, it’s important to look at how that has been assigned to marginalized groups. Lust, as a concept, has been used to oppress women in countless ways (”too distracting,” temptress archetype, “asking for it,” etc), sex workers in countless ways (even though ‘lust’ literally has nothing to do with performing sexual labor), and LGBT people in countless ways (who have been abused, faced housing and employment discrimination, have been tortured, sentenced to conversion therapy, chemically castrated, sterilized, forbidden from raising children, forbidden from using public restrooms, raped, and killed) under the guise of punishing the ‘sin’ of our ‘lust.’ 

So this joke, whether intentionally or not, is evoking a tool of marginalization– the concept of deadly sins– and is suggesting a division between ace and non-ace and assigning the notion of “less sinful” to ace people and “more sinful” to non-ace people. 

That implication directly plays into the ideology used to marginalize LGBT people, and has been evoked in traumatic histories of users who have read that post. It made them uncomfortable, scared, upset, etc., because it was a joke that punched down at them. And they have a right to be offended at that, no matter what the original intention of the joke was.