Tori-goes-to-college

I was just told to my face by my professor that I’m misinterpreting Gatsby and that my 20+ long page thesis that’s due in just over two weeks is not going to be possible to write even though I’ve been sitting in that class getting no help and no feedback and useless handout after useless handout every single day despite every single student in there practically begging for help because he’s so incompetent and unproductive and unfit to teach I want to kill myself

How does one go about signifying to a person or persons that one is delighted by said person’s/persons’ company, and would like to initiate the movement from the stage “acquaintance” to that of “friend” or, if said person/persons would allow it, “close friend”?

More importantly, how does one go about this business without seeming like a babbling fool?

So I found a shul last night

I mean, I didn’t find it. I was at an arts festival and there was a tent with these nice ladies from this synagogue, and I took a flyer and have been meaning to go ever since, but last night I finally was able to go.

It was amazing.

I almost cried because for the first time in over 3 years I was back in a Jewish community where people really cared about one another. There was ruach with people singing harmonies to the prayers, an interactive discussion of the week’s parsha during the service, and when we said the hamozi, everyone formed this kind of chain so that everyone was connected to someone who was touching the challah. The service was amazing. Even though most of the melodies were different, the words were the same, and it was so comforting.

Everyone was so kind to me and even though it was my first time there, I felt like I was coming home. It’s made me think about what it means to be Jewish without a community, something I was trying to do for most of my time here at school, and while it’s certainly not meaningless, it’s incredibly lonely and kind of dismisses a large part of what we tend to value.

Through all the shit that happened throughout our history, we have only come to value our community more and more, and it makes me think that what my dad used to tell me was certainly true:

“I can be anywhere in the world, lost, without knowing a single soul, but when I step into a synagogue on Shabbat, I will always find family.”