The internet slowed down a lot and I just want to cry

Sharpie Promises

Originally posted by escaped-ocelot

Raphael x Reader

Sharpie Promises

Note: I don’t know if I’ll publish this or not, but basically, I’m a ho for TMNT and soulmate AUs and I’ve never seen a TMNT Soulmate AU, so here you go. It’s the 2k14/2k16 turtles btw. Idk. I might do more of these if you guys like it.

Raphael wasn’t human. He had struggled with this, but had eventually come to terms with the fact. He didn’t have a soulmate and he wouldn’t ever find love. Not in a world full of humans. He tried to be all right with it. Keyword: tried.

It wasn’t until he was working out one day that he felt something cold and wet travelling across his left forearm. Just as quickly as it had started, it stopped. He removed his three-fingered hands from the weight he had been lifting and sat up to examine it.


Messy black letters written in Sharpie. His green eyes narrowed. What was this? He had never felt or seen anything like this. But there it was, plain as day on his arm. He stared at it, afraid that the words would disappear, but no. They stayed right where they were. And then soon after, more appeared from nowhere, as though a ghost was writing on his arm with an invisible marker.

So, it’s like three in the morning here and I don’t know if I’m doing this right, but um, hi.

A long pause. Raph stared in amazement, too shocked to say anything.

You’re probably asleep, aren’t you? Dammit. Well, um…bye, I guess.

He had never run so fast in his life.

“Woah, woah, watch it!” Donnie raised his arms as Raph pushed his chair away from his station and grabbed a Sharpie, pulling off the cap between his teeth and scrawling in the empty space on his arm.



Your heart raced as a response finally appeared.


Big, messy letters that you could tell had been written in a rush.

I’m here. Who are you? What’s happening?

You stared at the letters, the handwriting. Your stomach dropped, the nerves kicking in. This was it. This was your soulmate. You had no idea how this worked. No one did, but it worked, and that was all that mattered. A magical pen-pal from far away, probably. Why anyone would be up at this ungodly hour besides you was beyond you. But now you had to reply. You turned over your arm to write back.

I’m (Y/N). Your soulmate, I think. I don’t know…this is what everyone else does, but I’ve always been too shy to try.



Raph’s heart skipped a beat when the word was written on his arm. Soulmate. He had a soulmate. He actually had…Oh my God.

“Raph, are you crying?” Mikey asked, looking up at his older brother, whose eyes certainly looked a little misty.

“N-no. I just got dirt in my eye. Go away.” He sniffled and smiled.

“Whatcha doin’?” the youngest turtle looked over Raph’s shoulder and scanned a few words before he raised his arm far above Mikey’s head, but he had already seen it. Soulmate. “You…you have a soulmate?”

“I guess so.” Raph shrugged. By now, Donnie and Leo were paying attention to what was happening.

“You have a what?” Donnie’s head snapped around. He pulled down Raph’s arm to examine it. But there it was, plain as day. What the internet described as a ‘soulmate exchange’. “I didn’t think it was scientifically possible for you…for us to have…”

“Are you serious?” Leo came over to look.

“What do I look like? A freakin’ museum?” Raph snapped. “Now go away. I gotta write ‘er back.” The others gave him some space as he walked over to the couch and sat down, the tip of the Sharpie hovering over his green arm.

Soulmate, huh? Did think I had one of those. Name’s Raphael. Nice to meet ya.


What are you, a renaissance artist? Lol JK

Something like that.

So where are you from, Mr. Renaissance Artist?

New York, New York.

Seattle, Washington. Well, this might be a little complicated, huh?

Something like that…


You wrote to Raphael until the sun came up and then you crashed. You had thought it was a dream until you saw the words written there the next morning. You had a soulmate. His name was Raphael. He was from New York.

But at least he existed. It could be a lot worse.

It wasn’t until about noon, three o’clock there, that you wrote to him again, after having wiped your arm off to give you more room to write.

Good morning.

You wake up at noon?

Only when I’m up until sunrise talking to my soulmate.

Fair enough.

So how’s your day been?


Fair enough.


Leo, Donnie, and Mikey were all bunched behind Raphael to watch.

“Go away!”

“Dude, we just wanna watch.” Mikey whined.

“Go! Away!”

“All right, sheesh,” Donnie walked back to his lab, and Leo and Mikey reluctantly walked away.


He wrote.

What’cha wanna talk about?

I don’t know.

What’s it like in Seattle?

Rainy. What’s it like in New York?

Noisy. He replied, a smirk spreading across his scarred lips. How old are you?



Nice. How tall are you?

Like 6’5”-ish.

Holy shit! You’re gonna have to bend down to kiss me.

Kiss you. He was going to kiss you. Eventually. A new concept. Butterflies spread through his stomach, but he tried to play it off.

You a shorty?

Compared to you, yeah. Always had a thing, for tall guys, though. No worries. ;)

He smiled.

Got any hobbies? You asked.

Ninjitsu, bein’ a giant mutant turtle, etc…

Uh, I knit sometimes. And I work out. A lot.

Mr. Muscles the Knitting Renaissance Artist. You keep getting better and better.

So what do you do for fun, Shorty in Seattle?

Oh you know, read, write, spend ungodly amounts of time on the internet.

Sounds fun.

It is. So, anyways, I’ve been looking into New York travel recently (and by recently I mean right now immediately) for reasons, you know. Anyway, what area of New York should I travel to in…ten months when I go to college (that I’ve just applied to) there?


After a long day of talking to you and patrolling and trying to work out, Raph was exhausted. He laid in his top bunk, reading your ramble with a smile.

After replying, he knew it was time to go to sleep.

I’m wiped. I gotta sleep.

Oh, okay. Goodnight Raph.

Night, (nickname).

I love you.

His heart skipped a beat.

I love you too.

I can’t wait to meet you.

Already countin’ down the days, babe.

Me too.


Weeks later, you got an idea.

So, theoretically, if I were to Skype you, would you pick up?

I don’t have a Skype.

I want to hear your voice.

I can call you, if you want. I just don’t do video chats?


Because I’m a giant freaking mutant turtle and I don’t want my soulmate to hate and/or be afraid of me.

I want to see you for the first time in person.

All right then. Here’s my number.

You waited in bated breath for your phone to ring, and then suddenly it did. Your thumb hovered above the accept button. You felt like your whole body was trembling.

“Hey there.” You could hear the shaking in your voice. He chuckled, and already you loved the sound of his laugh.

“Hey yourself,”

“Oh my God, I love your voice.” You gushed.

“I love yours too, shorty.”

“Aaaaah! Your accent is so hot!”

“Heh, yeah.” He smiled.

“Ooh, are you talking to (Y/N)?” Mikey asked. “Can I say hi?”

“No, you can’t. Shoo.”

“Who’s that?” You asked.

“My little brother.” Mikey tried to reach up and grab Raph’s phone, but he squirmed away from him. “Mikey, go away!”


“Go away!”

“I wanna say hi to your girlfriend!!”

“Mikey, leave Raph alone.” Leo smirked from across the lair. The youngest brother left, deflated.

“Sorry ‘bout that. Where were we?”

“I was gushing over your very attractive voice, Mr. Muscles.”

“Ah. Right.” He tried not to blush and failed miserably. A slow smirk snuck across his lips. “I love you.”

“I love you too!”


“Did you get it yet?” Raph called you a few months before you were supposed to arrive. As the day approached, he got more and more anxious. You would be here in New York and he wouldn’t be able to skirt around the truth anymore. He was a giant turtle and you were a human girl. It wasn’t going to work out.

But nonetheless, he had sent you something. Something to remember him by if it didn’t work out, he supposed.

“It came in today! I haven’t opened it yet, though. I’m going to right now. Give me a sec, I’m gonna put you on speaker.”

“All right.” Raph listened as you set down your phone and put him on speaker. Then came the noise of you cutting the tape and opening the small cardboard box and sifting through the tissue paper.

“Oh my gosh! It’s amazing! I love it! You really made this?”

“I did.” He smirked. You held up the perfect little pendant. A polished wooden turtle that Raphael had carved himself. It hung from a simple twine string. You put it on immediately, tying the necklace around your neck. You let your fingers run over all of the intricate little grooves.

“I’m never taking it off, I hope you know that.”

“I’m flattered.” He chuckled. “I can’t wait to see how it looks on ya.”

“I can’t wait to see you.”

A nervous little laugh.

“Yeah. Pretty soon, now.”

“It couldn’t come soon enough.” You smiled warmly. “It’s late. I’m gonna get some sleep. Exams tomorrow and then I’m out of school for the summer. And then, only two months until I get to see you.”

“Well, you rest up, shorty. Get good grades. I don’t want ya to fail.”

“Good night. I love you.”

“I love ya too. Night.”

When he hung up, he stared at the ceiling. God, what was he gonna do?


You were full of jitters when you landed in New York two short months later. The time had crawled by so slow, but you passed the time. And now you were here, the center of the modern world.

“I’m here! I just landed! When do you want to meet up?”

“Um, how about you get settled? Go to your apartment or whatever. I’ll come over tonight.”

“Okay.” Your heart raced. “Okay. I’ll see you then. I’ll uh, get you the address once I find it.”

“Sounds like a plan. Stay safe. I’ll see ya tonight.”

“See you.” When you hung up, Raph started to pace through the lair.

“I’m going to see her tonight. Oh my God. She’s gonna find out I’m a giant turtle and she’s gonna hate me.”

“Statistically, after ten months of-”

“No more science bulllshit, Don! I’m a freak! She’s gonna run screamin’ and I’ll never see her again!”

“It’ll be fine, Raph. You’re over reacting. As usual.” Leo’s tone was cool, annoyed. “She loves you. We’d have to be blind not to see that.”

“I guess we’ll find out tonight, huh?” He slumped onto the couch, a deep dread setting in. Tonight was not going to be pretty. He knew it.


After you had unpacked and met your roommate, a very nice woman named April who had been searching for a roommate for some time now, you called Raph and gave him an address. He asked about how things were and so you told him about your roommate. He chuckled. Well, that might make things a little easier. He told you he wasn’t far and he would be over in a few.

“Who’s that?” April asked after you hung up.

“My soulmate. He’s the reason I moved here, actually. He’s coming here if that’s okay.”

“More than fine with me.” She smiled. “What’s his name?”

“Raphael.” You told her. Her face lit up in surprise. Now the turtle necklace she had complimented you on when you walked in made a whole lot of sense. She doubted that you knew why though.

So this was the (Y/N) he had talked about. His soulmate. Shorty from Seattle.

“Nice name.”

“I know, right?” Your phone buzzed. “Oh my God, it’s him.”

“Hey babe, come outside.” You stood there in confusion for a second. “Fire escape.”

“Oh, okay. I’ll be down in a sec.” You nodded, tucking the phone away. Your heart raced as you climbed out the window and down the metal fire escape to the alley below. There, in the shadows stood a very tall, very large silhouette.

“Hey there.” It was him. His voice. In person. “I uh, I need ya to promise me something, gorgeous.”


“Just…p-promise you won’t scream.”

“Why would I-?”


“I promise.” You stated certainly.

“I, uh, I ain’t exactly…normal.”

“I love you, Raph.”

“You won’t when you see me.” His voice was quiet as all of his insecurities came to the surface.

“Raphael,” You reached out for him, hand forward for a long few moments until his three-fingered green one met it, pressing against it like Tarzan and Jane. Something familiar and something foreign. You gasped quietly, but when he moved to pull away, you gripped one of his large fingers. “Please.”

He let out a long sigh, considering bolting then and there, but he gave in and took a few slow, heavy steps out of the dark to where you could see him. Your soulmate was a giant mutant turtle. He waited for the sting of rejection, for the tears of disappointment streaming down your cheeks, but they never came. Instead, you pulled his muscular arms around yourself, clinging to him as though this was your last chance. He held you tight against his plastron, his knees giving out in the wave of relief that washed over him. Raph buried his face in the crook of your neck, and you felt hot tears against your skin.

Thank you.” A broken whisper from his scarred lips. “Thank you.”

“I love you.” You kissed his cheek and then his forehead, and you lifted his face to look at the green face under the tattered red bandana.

“All ‘uh this don’t bug you?” He asked, tear-filled green eyes searching yours. “You don’t care that I’m a freak?”

“You’re not a freak, Raphael.” The feeling of your soft skin against his face drove him up the wall in the best possible way. “Not to me.”

“Are ya just sayin’ that because I’m your soulmate?”

“I mean it.” You locked eyes with him and he felt as though you were staring into his soul. His smile was the most gorgeous thing you had ever seen. Curiosity sparked behind your eyes as you examined every inch of him, taking him in. “What are you?”

There wasn’t hatred or fear in your voice, only awe.

“I’m a mutant. A turtle. Hence the uh-” he motioned to the necklace around your neck. “That.”

“I love turtles,” You whispered as you kissed his snout. You were so close. So close he could just about…

You closed the gap between you, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. He didn’t know how to respond, but followed his instincts and tried his hardest to kiss you back. His large hands held your hips and your small hands framed his jaw before moving to his shoulders, fingers gently searching the terrain of his shell.

When you finally pulled away from him, you looked at him for a long time.

“Hey do you wanna come up for pizza?” April called down from the apartment window.

“Yeah, sure April. Are the guys coming?”

“Just got off the phone with Leo. They’re on their way.”

“Wait, you two know eachother?” You asked. Raph smiled and shrugged, finally getting to his feet and taking you with him. God, he was so tall.

“We go way back.” April smiled. “I named him.”


“Long story. Come on, shorty.” He picked you up off of the ground as if you weighed nothing and carried you on his hip, your feet dangling a foot in the air. “’Bout time you met my brothers, huh?”


After you had met his brothers and enjoyed some celebratory pizza, the six of you had settled down to watch a movie. At the moment, Raph was spread out on the couch with you laying on top of him and a cozy red blanket draped over both of you. He nuzzled into your neck as your hands traced gentle circles on his plastron.

“I love you, Raphael.” You kissed his jaw. He hummed contentedly.

“I love you too, soulmate.” The word had never sounded so right.

@turtllinis @turtimagines @turtlebaes @anetteshortie @imagineninjaturtles @imaginetmnt @totally-turtle-imagines @immortal-turtles

How I Overcame Reader’s Block (And So Can You!)

As a kid, I adored reading.  Okay, more specifically, I enjoyed reading about dragons, but that’s not the issue here.  

It frequently coincided with my equally as intense love of climbing trees, and some of my fondest memories involve being perched in a small tree and reading some hopelessly goofy, dragon-related literature while my mom and toddler siblings used the playground equipment.  If no climbable trees were available, I’d settle for reading under one and drinking a thermos of chocolate milk while they ran around in the park. 

As I got older, my tastes got a little more eclectic as I encountered Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, Anne Shirley, the residents of Narnia and Middle Earth, respectively, and much to my mother’s horror, Stephen King, but my passion remained more or less the same.    

Bottom line is, I loved reading.  It was my paramount joy, my primary source of entertainment, and I didn’t think that would ever change.

So imagine my shock when, around my sophomore year of college at the age of seventeen, it occurred to me that I hadn’t really read for pleasure since I discovered the Hunger Games a year or two prior.  Moreover, and equally as horrifically, when I tried to read I found I couldn’t focus;  regardless of the quality of the story and how much I wanted to read it, the investment was gone.

Whether this was due to my first stint with organized education (prior to college, I was homeschooled) or the fact that I’d grown accustomed to the bite-sized chunks of candy-flavored, insubstantial information served up by the internet, the sad and simple fact was that I had fallen out of love with reading, and it looked like it was going to stay that way forever.   

Well, flash forward two-point-five years to Present-Day Brooksie, and since school got out in early May, I’ve read Chuck Palahniuk’s Make Something Up: Stories You Can’t Unread, Ruth Ware’s In a Dark, Dark Wood, Emma Straub’s The Vacationers, Neil Gaiman’s The Graveyard Book, and Celeste Ng’s Everything I Never Told You.  Despite the disappointing lack of dragons, I loved all of them.    

I drink books like nectar again, if you’ll pardon the floral language, and everything from the quality of my writing to the quality of my life has improved as a result of it.  

So how did I fall back in love with reading?  Well, I’ve spent a lot of time pontificating on this, and as far as I can tell, it can be narrowed down to three factors:

1.  Reading every day.

It started with lunch.  Every day, when I’d sit down at my university cafe, I used to get out my laptop and watch YouTube or whatnot while I ate my sandwich – a cool idea in theory, but really sort of gross whenever I rubbed my greasy fingers on the mouse and keyboard. 

When I made a conscious decision to read more, I began taking out my book and reading during the lunch period instead.  It didn’t come naturally at first – I was easily distracted and kept zoning out – but I ultimately found it very pleasant, especially when I listened to some classical music in the background as well (nice for atmosphere, and for drowning out noise and distractions.)  

I kept doing it.  

When that summer rolled around, I rediscovered an amazing little outdoor cafe by the harbor.  It had no wifi, which for my purposes, was absolutely perfect.

I went there to read Good Omens and eat home baked lemon squares, pie, and banana bread, listening to international tourists speak in other languages, and watch the boats go by.  It was a beautiful environment, and that (coupled with the fact that Good Omens is just really fucking awesome) made it easier than ever for me to want to stay longer and become more engrossed in what I was reading.

Afterwards, I’d take out my notebook and work on my own stories and journal.  Overall, I’d say that summer was one of the most intellectually productive I’ve had.  

Once school started again, it got a little harder to read every day, but by then my love of reading had pretty much caught:  it had become an intellectual drug for me again, a source of comfort, pleasure, and inspiration.  Also, it was another viable excuse to procrastinate on my academic responsibilities, which was always welcome.  So I kept reading.  It was still a relatively slow process, as I had to work around my already busy schedule, but the more I read the more adept I became at drinking in the information in hungry, satisfying gulps (a bit more suggestive than I’d initially intended that metaphor to be, but I’m going to go with it.)

But this isn’t to say that there were no bumps in the road back to bibliophilia.  There was another factor that I had to grasp before I reached the point where I could unabashedly adore reading once again.

Which is: 

2.  Reading what excites me.

No, I’m not speaking sexually, you pervert.  I’m talking about books I actually want to read.  

When I first started trying to get back into literature, I started trying to read the classics exclusively, like Around the World in Eighty Days and Little Women.  Let me be clear, these books are amazing (excluding the jarring amounts of racism and endorsements of British colonialism in the former) but after semesters of reading similar works for my literature seminars, they just felt a little like…academia.  

In fact, the only reason I was insistent on reading classics exclusively, I now realize, was because I was a pretentious, pseudo intellectual little shit back in those days with a horrible case of impostor syndrome.  What I needed to re-learn was what dragon-loving, Ten-Year-Old Brooksie long since already knew: the best way to enjoy reading is to read what you actually enjoy.

It was a lesson I slowly but surely remastered, and it took me a while to realize that modern literature is teaming with smart, enriching reads, like Life of Pi, American Gods, Where’d You Go Bernadette, The Twelve Tribes of Hattie, The Help, Everything I Never Told You, and countless others.  

Moreover, these were books I didn’t have to force myself to read;  they were books I found myself reading at four AM because I didn’t want to stop.  

I’ve also discovered classics that I can eat up in a matter of days, like A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (Which absolutely everyone should read, by the way:  Francie Nolan is a feminist icon, and way, way ahead of her time, not to mention it’s fucking hilarious and will make you cry like a little bitch), Jane Eyre, and basically anything written by Jane Austen.  I love these books for their sharp wit, applicable and timeless life observations, and striking lack of the pretentiousness that I’d come to associate with a lot of classic literature.

This summer, I my reading list includes Vonnegut’s Slaughterhouse 5, Douglas Adams’ The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, Chuck Palahniuk’s Fight Club, Louis Sachar’s Holes, Anthony Doerr’s All the Light We Cannot See, and Neil Gaiman’s Anansi Boys.  I’m looking forward to reading each and every one of them. 

Ultimately, the point I’m trying to make here is that there’s no joy to be found in pretentiousness:  don’t read to prove yourself as an intellectual.  Read to enrich your soul, read what you legitimately enjoy, and read what inspires you.  

Which brings me to my next and final point…   

3.  Reading what inspires me.

This one might be true specifically for my fellow authors, but since I know a large portion of my followers are fellow authors, I think it’s applicable here.  

Ever since I was an infinitesimally small child, I’ve wanted to write stories.  When I was fourteen I wrote a hopelessly angsty YA novel about a half-dragon girl named Freedom and her misadventures with an ambiguously lesbian vampire and werewolf duo, a seductive and ambiguously bisexual elf (it was a time of self discovery for me), and a talking lion.  When I was eleven, I wrote a middle grade novel about a little boy who befriends a dragon.  When I was four, I wrote *ahem!* drew wordless stories about a winged wolf-creature named Starlight and his (in retrospect, overtly gory) battles with monsters.

It was bizarre, cringey, and I’m not gonna lie, pretty fucking awesome.  

Around the time I started college at around sixteen, I’d just decided I wanted to start writing again.  I had lots of ideas, and I remember in detail getting yelled at by my manager for scribbling in my notebook behind the counter instead of dutifully smiling at customers the way I was supposed to.  

But my writing was…well, to put it bluntly, it was really, really bad.  It only began to improve when I resolved to write every day.  It noticeably and drastically began to improve when I began to read works that I found creatively inspiring. 

While I was revising my manuscript, I read a lot of Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, both masters of the kind of urban fantasy I was attempting to write,  and spent a lot of time figuring out what I loved most about their writing and how to best apply it.  This was also around the time I began reading Douglas Adams, which was, let me tell you, a magical experience.  It involved a lot of delighted gasping on my end and thinking you’re allowed to do that?

It really showed me what the barriers were for creative writing, or in this case, total lack thereof.

I think I owe these writers a lot for helping me to create several novel-length manuscripts I’m incredibly proud of, and one that I’m currently preparing to get published.

So in closing, for anyone suffering from reader’s block, feel free to try my approach:  read every day, read what you love and not to stoke your ego, and for my writer peeps, read what inspires you.

Either way, my books and I are enjoying a passionate long-term relationship, and every day I find myself loving them more.

1. I should’ve bought more flowers for you, now I buy flowers even if today isn’t Valentine’s Day or a day with a specific meaning, in a way, every petal is imbued with an apology and every time someone leans in to smell it they can feel the parts of me that you’ve forgiven far long before I could

2. I didn’t start to feel better until I started to take better care of myself, a constant whisper of you saying “i was just worried about you”

3. You can’t let someone be your only source of happiness because once they’re gone, you’re all alone again and there’s nothing worse than starting all the way back over with yourself: square one of a broken heart multiplied by the intensity of she’s not coming back, let her go

4. Music will never betray me

5. Poetry is thinking that you’ve got it figured out and a metaphor is just your way of saying I don’t

6. Art rules the world and I am a masterpiece in progress; how can I love myself like how you did if I can’t see that little bit?

7. Lust isn’t conducive for growth, it’s like an addict trying to get his fix– some day, he’s going to break and not even the drug can help him

8. I buy myself nice things, but I can’t fill this emptiness inside of my heart– I guess some nights, I just miss being next to you

9. I still can’t get used to sleeping alone

10. Sometimes I wish I would’ve picked up your phone calls during the first few months, I broke my promise and you know something? I regret it

11. I threw away our love letters and memories two months ago, I cried the whole time– yeah, still a fool for you, but baby, we’ve changed so much, I’m happy with my unhappy

12. You once told me to go on many adventures without you, did you account for my depression? You know, I don’t blame you for any of this. In reality it was always an us thing, a too young thing, a stupid, mad love thing– as always, I still love you, I just don’t know what love is anymore

13. They were right, soulmates touch you and they change you forever– the moment a colorful paint filled brush hits the water and the figments of colors flow into the cup, you left my soul with so many seasons, I’m still raking up the leaves from last fall

14. The last time I saw you we shouldn’t have had sex, I think that night really broke you– I think that night really broke me too

15. I should’ve laid my head onto your chest and counted your heartbeats more often, I’m sorry

16. Sometimes when I talk to people and tell them random facts that you’ve filled my head up, I swear I can hear your voice echo in the back of my head– “baby, check this out, you’re gonna love it”

17. I always do

18. I still remember your favorite Harry Potter line

19. After all of this time? …Always.

20. I smoke cigarettes to think about how to think less, the fucking irony

21. I take painkillers and my excuse is that my right hand still hurts, in truth, I’m just another addict that believes if I take another maybe my heart might just start to sound like it belongs to me

22. I didn’t cut myself because I wanted to die, I cut myself open because I wanted to feel how often I made your heart break, each scar on my shoulders is a time when I’ve made you cry

23. And each night that I can’t sleep, I stay up wishing that you’re doing okay

24. I don’t pray often, but when I do, I always prayed for your mom, although she hated me, I’m so glad that she put you on this earth to allow us to meet– I have changed so much since I’ve met you

25. The crazy part? You still change me everyday

26. You know the renaissance era? Falling in love with you was like that

27. My favorite photo of us were those two kids eating a banana split at the New Orleans mall, I miss those two innocent kids, oh, how we’ve changed

28. We are destined to have this eternal flame kind of distance– the brighter I burn, the more you’ll read, the only thing that keeps me writing some days is knowing that somewhere, somehow you’re always reading, no matter who you’re with or if you’re laughing or crying or smiling

29. My number one fan was always you first

30. I’ve made so many bad decisions, you were never one of them

31. I’ve written so many bad poems, you were in every single one

32. I’ve written some pretty great ones too tho…!
You were also in those

33. I miss cleaning your eyes for you

34. I have met some amazing people because of what happened to us

35. I can’t get you by Fallbrooke the acoustic version is no longer on the internet, the funny part? The very last day that it was on the web, I downloaded it right before they removed it. It’s still my favorite song of all time, our song

36. Hold your tears by Clazziquai too

37. Sometimes when I get off from work, I sit in the car and cry, some tears don’t have meaning, they just need to come out

38. I claim to write poetry, but I feel like they’re just love letters sent to no one in particular

39. It’s not that I’m not over you, I’m just trying to get used to not needed you

40. It’s not that it hurts to the point where I can’t breathe, I’m just trying to light my own path to self-love and healing

41. The fact that your favorite color is orange, it makes the fruit taste some type of way

42. Sometimes I want to call you, but I don’t

42. Sometimes I want to text you and I do

43. Sometimes I want you to answer, I’m glad you don’t

43. Sometimes I just want to say fuck it all and call, I’m glad that I don’t

44. You stopped writing when we first met, in some way, the girl that waits by the shore has left a million pens near my desk and to this day– I wait by the shore too, just in case inspiration hits, right?

45. Our little codes of love finally decoded enough for me to not be blinded by you

46. We were both messed up people, I think we knew that about each other and maybe that’s why I always know when you’re not feeling okay

47. I still don’t have love figured out, but damn I’ll open every fucking door in my heart even if I have to go down the sewer to find every key

48. Someone says that she’s falling for me, I’m legit afraid to hurt people now– like it’s a real fear, I don’t want to hurt anyone anymore

49. I should’ve given you the stars, but instead I left your heart scattered across the universe

50. It’s been almost two year and I’m still writing about you, but at least it’s less often, right?

51. You’ve always been kinda self-centered, I think you enjoy it when I write about you. Like if I write about you in some way, maybe I’m still yours

52. We were just too damn young to realize how destructive passion, love, romance, stagnation, betrayal and pain is when mixed together

53. Sometimes I go to the places that we used to go just to create new memories without you

54. Sometimes it works

55. Most of the time, it just flicks me off

56. My brain is constantly telling me that I’m a fuck up and the more I try to get it right, the more I keep getting it wrong

57. I am trying to master the art of letting go

58. And this list is a step towards better things

59. And this life is going to be alright

60. Without you, I am still me

61. Without you, I can still breathe

62. Without you, I am still alive

63. Without you, I am still poetry

64. I can barely remember your face, I guess being around a lot of different people at work helps out plenty

65. This world is filled with pain, I hope you look back and smile about us some day

66. Maybe when you’re old and grey– you’ll remember those two young kids who slow danced in the dark

67. If we were made from the same star, I want to return home some day

68. I want to shine bright enough for the two of us

69. You’re still my best friend even if we no longer talk

70. You’ll always be my best friend

71. I still care about you

72. A whole fucking lot

73. The world is full of mysteries, I’m glad that we’re in the known, I’m glad that we’ve met

74. I hope you never regret me, you wanna know why? I could never, ever, ever, ever regret you

75. I don’t know how to open up to people anymore and I’m not sure if it’s my fault or yours– maybe this one time, it’s our fault… are you like this too?

76. I’ve been told that I’m too hard on myself, I firmly believe that one of the reason as to why we split was because I wasn’t hard enough on myself– I got too fucking comfortable with your promises and I took you for granted

77. Life waits for no one

78. I let an ex of mine break my red and black ring– she said that if I was over you, I’d let her break. I let her break it, but jokes on me, it didn’t change a thing about how I still feel about you

79. I keep writing and writing and writing because one of these days– it’ll stop being about you

80. Sometimes it works, but deep down, I know in some way, you’ll always find a way to sneak back out

81. I can’t get you out of my head sometimes

82. It’s even harder because you’re still inside of my heart

83. I saw this cool picture on Tumblr with someone cutting a piece of herself off that resembled two lovers splitting up, that shit looked like it hurt

84. Love hurts because even eating cotton candy ice cream really fast will give you a brain freeze

85. You didn’t like my rat tail idea, I grew one out just to fuck with you. Jokes on me, I love it now.

86. You never really supported the idea of me being anything, tbh, it’s not your fault. None of it is. I should’ve been my own motivation. I guess by supporting you through nursing school, I wanted to hear you say that I could do it even when I was at my lowest point.

87. I realized a few thing about loving you.

88. When you hit rock bottom, few will be loyal enough to stick it out with you

89. Money rules the world, since I’m not wealthy in any way– one day when I am, I can laugh a little about all of this

90. I think you loved our memories more than you loved me, in truth, I did too

91. Maybe that’s why it’s hard to get close to people

92. Maybe that’s why it’s hard to let you go

93. Maybe that’s why you still read

94. We had something raw and experimental, young and dumb, mistakes on top of mistakes

95. It was a perfect compass to point us to our future selves

96. I know a great many things now– although I am depressed, with or without you

97. I am great, I am strong

98. I am my own happy before anyone else’s

99. I can love myself enough to let you go

100. I had to hurt you to really, really grow–
I think to this day, that’s the thing that hurts me the most. That I had to hurt my best friend in this whole wide world, to make you crumble, to make you cry, to make you hate me– I had to do all of that in order to love myself. And it’s sad because here I am, still trying to figure it all out.

With or without you, I will be a better person.
—  100 things I figured out when we broke up
As Long As You Both Shall Live

 Bucky Barnes X reader X Steve Rogers

Till Death Do Us Part

Summary- In a world where everyone is born with the name of their soulmate-or soulmates- on their wrist the reader has the horrible fate of being bound to two dead soldiers. That is until she sees Captain America fighting in New York. Does she run from her destined love or does she go to him?

Message- This is part 2 to Till Death do us Part! I added some T’cham to the story. I got the idea of Bucky burning/ scratching off his soul mark form a story @iavengesuperwholock wrote! There is going to be at least one more part! Sorry if it sucks!!!

Word Count-1300ish

It took you and Steve about 6 months to track anything down. Steve had enlisted the help from all of the other Avengers. It’s Natasha who finally finds something. She hand you and Steve the file and tell you that you should probably read it while sitting down. So you and Steve take the file back to your shared apartment and sit down at the kitchen table and you start to read it.

You were going to be sick. Your soulmate was alive-if you can call it that- he was tortured and experimented on. Hydra had conditioned him to be their puppet, they had even cut the arm with Steve’s name on it off, so Bucky wouldn’t have any way to remember who he was. There was also a picture of his other wrist it showed that your name had been branded off.

“He did that the night before he left. He wanted to keep you safe, he was going to do the same thing to my name but I convinced him not to. When he was captured he had started to scratch it off, but I rescued him before he could finish.”

“We need to find him, we need to bring him home.” You whisper. Steve nods and he takes your hand in his.

“I know, doll, I know.”


You and Steve were currently living in DC. You were having your morning run when Steve decides to mess with the other jogger there. As Steve was lapping the two of you, you speed up so you can run next to him.

“Sorry, about him, he can get annoying at times.” You joke.

“Well, he is Captain America, I guess he’s earned the right to be a bit annoying. I’m Sam.”

“Y/N, I’m the showoffs soulmate.”

“So, what’s it like being Captain America’s soulmate.”

“Well it was pretty depressing for most of my life, thinking my soulmate was dead and all, but now it’s great.”

“Yeah, I’m an error to. I only got a first name, T’Challa. I’ve been looking for him but-“he stops talking, lost in thought.

“We’re looking for our other soulmate to.” You say as the two of you start to slow down. Eventually the two of you sit down by a tree. The two of you talk about different ideas to locate Sam’s soulmate when you here:

“Need a medic?”

“I need a need a new set of lungs. Dude, you just ran, like thirteen miles in thirty minutes.” Sam says. “Do you even try to keep up with him?”

“Sometimes he’s nice and runs at my pace, but usually it’s just a bunch of on your lefts. Only thirteen miles, really Stevie?”

“Guess I got a late start.” Steve says while grinning at you.

“Really? You should be ashamed of yourself. You should take another lap. Did you just take it? I assume you just took it.” As Sam spoke you and Steve started to laugh.

“What unit are you in?” Steve asks.

“58th Para rescue. But now I’m working down at the VA.” Sam says as Steve helps the two of you up. “Sam Wilson.”

“Steve Rogers.”

“Yeah, she told me. Must have freaked you out coming home after the whole defrosting thing.”

“Takes some getting used to. It’s good to meet you, Sam.” You turn to wave to Sam. You had already exchanged numbers, so the two of you could meet up to talk about ways to look for your soulmates.

“It’s your bed, right?” Sam says and Steve stops and turns back.

“What’s that?

“It’s your bed it’s too soft. When I was over there I’d sleep on the ground, used rock for pillows, like a caveman. Now I’m home lying in my bed and it’s like…” Sam says.

“Lying on a marshmallow. Feel like I’m gonna sink right to the floor. How long?” Stevie asks.

“Two tours. You must miss the good old days. Huh?” A lot of people asked him that and it always made you laugh.

“Well, things aren’t so bad. Food’s a lot better, we used to boil everything, no Polio’s good. Internet, so helpful. Been reading that a lot. Trying to catch up.”

“Marvin Gaye, 1972 Trouble Man soundtrack. Everything you missed jammed into one hour.”

“I’ll put it on the list.” Steve said as he pulled his little notebook out and writes it down.


You and Steve were currently at a party that the EU was hosting for all of the dignitaries. It was quite boring but most of the dignitaries wanted to meet the famous Captain America. You were standing off to the side, watching your soulmate fondly.

“Hello, my name is Ayo, I am a member of the Dora Milaje, my King has requested your presence at his table.” A women in a stunning red dress says. You nod and follow her. She motions to a seat next to a man who was in a black suit. After you sit, some of the others introduce themselves and then you turn to the King in question.

“Hello, I’m Y/N, I’m Captain Rogers soulmate.” You say quietly. The King chuckles.

“Yes, I know who you are. I am King T’Challa.” Holy shit, holy fucking shit. This was Sam’s soulmate. You take your phone out of you clutch and you go to your photos and you scroll through until you find the photo of Sam’s soulmate tattoo. You then shove your phone in his face.

“Is this how you spell it?” you whisper.

“Y-you know Samuel Thomas Wilson?”

“I do, he works with Steve covertly and is one of our closest friends. He’s in the city now, if you want I can call him, he’s been looking for you for forever. He was so scared that his mark was an error.” T’Challa nods and you call Sam and tell him to come to the gala.

“That is not what I wanted to speak to you about, but I suppose it is fitting. You give me my soulmate and I give you yours.” King T’Challa says.

“What do you mean?” You ask.

“Hydra sent an assassin to kill my father a couple of years ago, we were able to apprehend him and soon realized that he was being controlled. So our scientists went to work on finding a way to deprogram him. They did about a year ago, but he didn’t remember much of his past life. Just the names Y/N and Steven.” You put your hand over your mouth to muffle the sobs.

“Bucky, you found Bucky.” You whisper.

“Yes.” You jump out of your chair and run to Steve. You drag him over to King T’Challa so he can tell him what he told you. Both you and Steve are sobbing messes when Sam arrives.

“Y/N, Steve, what’s wrong? Why did I have to come? Why are the two of you crying?” Sam asks.

“Sam, I would like you to meet King T’Challa.” You say. Sam stops breathing and just stares at T’Challa and then down at his wrist and then back at T’Challa. While Sam is trying to comprehend what just happened T’Challa is grinning like a fool in love.

“It is a pleasure to meet you, my heart.” T’Challa says. Sam looks at him for another minute and then he launches himself at the King and kisses him. When the break away, they lean their foreheads on each other’s.

“I was so worried that I would never find you.” Sam whispers.

“Well, you never have to worry about that again. Would you come with me to my country? Your friends are coming for a while. They are to be reunited with their lost love.” At that Sam turns to you and Steve.

“Wait, you guys found Bucky?”

“No we didn’t, he did.” You say motioning to T’Challa.

“Well, what are we waiting for? Let’s get going!” Sam says.

Tag List-.@sexysamsungl​ @agentbadbitch@marrvelle-fics @magellan-88​ 

sugar ❖ sehun (2)

The color red remembered you that your body craved for him, no matter how old and how related to your best friend he was.

admin : - velvet
genre : fluff, smut (in later parts), pretty huge age gap, kinda daddyish, ceo!sehun, angst

(gif not mine, cr to the owner)

Part 1 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Epilogue

Jump in❞ Sehun told you when you followed him out of the house and into the back garage. Outside the dark sky was already taking over everything, the lampposts outside Mina’s house were slowly switching on and your heart was beating way too fast.

Mr Oh looked heavenly while he sat in his grey 612 Scaglietti, meanwhile you salivated just watching the car. Of course you’ve seen sport cars, but this - this was you sitting inside of it, this was out of anything you dreamed about.

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anonymous asked:

okay here's my longgg WIW thought: AU where teen Nat breaks free of her conditioning/handlers in the late 90s! and starts working on her own side, trying to stealthily eliminate the Red Room and any other organization that relies heavily on brainwashing, b/c she never wants anyone to go through what she did. After a few months, she realizes that someone is helping her behind the scenes--covering her tracks electronically, dropping her hints about where the next cell might be, etc. 1/10

She should be freaked out that someone discovered her, can FOLLOW her, and she is, she’s terrified, but–this person is helping her. this person could have turned her in at any time. so it’s either someone who genuinely wants to help or someone who’s playing a long con to get her. she decides not to let her guard down around this person but to cautiously take their help–double-checking with outside sources before she goes off to do anything on their say-so, though. After a year she 2/10

gets an email that just has the location of a post box. She memorizes it, and when she checks her email again the next day, the message is gone. When she finds the box, she sees that her ghost has left her some new intel along with… some kind of electronic weapon? And instructions. She’s suspicious but she makes someone she’s about to kill test it out and her eyes go wide with delight. She quickly grows to love her new weapon. Her ghost keeps giving her intel/suggestions, but now every 3/10

few months there’s an upgrade, too. After a couple times of this she leaves a message in the box for them, b/c it’s the only way she can think of to contact them, saying thank you. Somehow that turns into the two of them corresponding through letters, and she becomes very fond of her ghost. They’ll never tell her who they are or give any hints, but the two of them talk about everything and nothing, play long games of chess over months, gossip over marked-up fashion magazines and about new 4/10

movies coming out. She feels like she gets to know her ghost very well. Like she can trust them. They have inside jokes! She thinks about them often. She thinks of them as a friend. She still tries to be wary but she knows, though she doesn’t want to admit it, that she’s compromised. She just hopes that they don’t give her away, and wishes she wasn’t so weak that she liked them so much. // ENTER THE WINTER SOLDIER. On a mission in the early 2000s he breaks free of his conditioning and 5/10

runs off to start his own crusade against HYDRA. He and Nat run into each other a few times on jobs they’ve both decided to take. They circle each other warily and exchange some blows, but nothing serious. The enemy of my enemy is my friend, right? Eventually she sends a message to her ghost and asks if they think the man is trustworthy. Her ghost comes back saying that the Winter Soldier has been reported missing and maybe this guy is him? Maybe they should bring him in on their project if 6/10

he hates brainwashing too. (Nat gets a warm feeling she quickly squashes when her ghost calls it ‘their’ project.) So she starts talking to the soldier when they run into each other and eventually he comes to find her one day and asks her what her deal is. She explains, asks if he wants to join them. He shrugs and that’s that, he’s now part of their op. Nat’s ghost starts calling him James because ‘he looks like Bucky Barnes, Nat, tell me you don’t see it!’ and slowly over time James gets 7/10

enmeshed into their friendship and letters and starts remembering more about his personality and some memories. So Nat’s ghost becomes THEIR ghost, and things are good. When a month goes by without hearing from their ghost, they don’t worry too much. But they’ve never gone more than two without hearing from them, so they DO worry after their ghost is silent that long. Nat thinks maybe she’s suddenly getting what more she could want to make her happy. What’s been missing. What she hasn’t 8/10

been admitting to herself about James and their ghost, and feelings. Futures. Families. Then she’s absently watching the news and they’re reporting on Tony Stark’s disappearance again–and she sits bolt upright. Tony Stark been missing for two months, Tony Stark is a mechanical genius, Tony Stark… and the pieces fall into place. She feels immense fury boiling inside of her at the thought that someone has their ghost held captive. No.He belongs with her and James. Heads will roll for this. 9/10

Cue a rescue mission to Afghanistan! (Sidenote: I imagine Tony was born ten years later in this au, but his parents still died in 1991. Obie took over the company until Tony would be old enough to take it on, leaving him a bored teenager in the late 90s trawling around on the internet while getting his second phd when he found Natasha. Tony of course has been in love with both of them and known it practically from meeting each but didn’t think they’d want him or it could work out.) 10/10

Originally posted by sayrix

I’m fine, I’m fine, just sitting here, crying and petting this beautiful headcanon. I don’t even know what to say. There is nothing to say. THIS IS PERFECTION! THANK YOU YOU BRILLIANT WONDERFUL ANON MAY YOUR MIND CONTINUE TO GIFT YOU WITH THESE BREATHTAKING IDEAS!!!

(I’m sorry I’m sorry, I just can’t resist: Nat and James are in the middle of fighting these pathetic terrorists who dared taking their ghost–and they’d enjoy the fight a lot more if it wasn’t for that cold, dreadful worry, that desperate need to find their ghost and make sure he’s okay–when a fucking metal suit starts blasting these bastards apart with the sort of blind fury they can appreciate but know to be wary off. Which is a good thing, because once the last of the Ten Ring guys is dead, James is almost too slow to avoid one of the blasts, and then suddenly the metal suit is on his knees, crying and apologising and it’s all very messy but they’ve got their ghost back and really that’s the only thing that matters, isn’t it?)

anonymous asked:

I just recently got out of a 5 year mentally abusive relationship and was wondering if you could do prompt of the main 5 reacting to MC going through the same thing and trying to learn love again.

Ohh I’m so sorry! I hope you’re surrounded by many many people who support you through this. I’m here to talk if you just want to vent or anything! Many hugs from my corner of the internet!! 

Also, please remember, if you think you’re in an emotionally/mentally/physically abusive or just abusive in general relationship, please reach out. Talk to someone. Escape. These types of relationships are not healthy and you have to remember to put your health above your partners, especially if you’re in this type of relationship. Your happiness is incredibly important, okay?

Originally posted by myotherusernamewasstolen

Originally posted by leprocrastinatingpanda

Here you go!! I’m going with a Fem!MC (and a gender-neutral partner) again, but just request again if you’d like gender neutral pronouns or anything different and i’ll edit it! Oh, it also got a bit longer than just a prompt… you guys, tell me if you want a pt 2 because i think i’ll only write a little bit in terms of getting used to loving again






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YOU ARE MY WHITE BEAUTY (Negan x albino reader imagine)

Summary: Y/N is the only one in the whole sanctuary who is an albino. Negan is a fan of her beauty. But the days in the sanctuary are not easy for her because some saviors are mobbing her. What will Negan do?

(English is my third language but I tried my best. Sorry for grammar and word mistakes)


Y/N has been in Sanctuary for 2 weeks.
Dwight had found her in the woods. She was alone and hurt. Now she worked in the Sanctary for points. But she was different. She was not like the others. She was an albino. The only thing she saw in the mirror was white only white.
She had heard a lot about Negan, but she had not met him yet.
One morning she was woken up by Dwight.

“Come on you have to clean up Negans room”

She stood straight up and changed her clothes. She walked with Dwight through the long corridors

“You will not touch anything else besides your work, have you heard me?”, said Dwight with a strong voice

“I am not deaf, and I am not interested in men’s affairs”

Dwight looked at her angrily.
When they arrived in Negan’s room, she looked around the huge room. It was so nice. She had not seen such a beautiful thing for a long time. A huge and probably very comfortable bed.

“Stop looking around and do your work”

Dwight went back again 

She stayed in the room and began to clean up Negan’s bed. He was probably awake. At that moment, Negan passed through the corridors and held Lucille in his hand. When he arrived in his room, the door was open. He slowed his steps. When his room became visible, he saw Y/N.
He was admired.
She was so beautiful, so fantastic. He walked slowly into the room and looked more closely at the girl. She did not see him, she folded the blanket. He knocked with Lucille on the door frame, Y/N frightened and looked quickly at him.

“What do we have here?”, he said in a calm voice.

She was ashamed and looked down He went with loose steps to her until her faces were only 1 cm apart. He grabbed her chin and lifted it so that she looked into his eyes. 

“Look at this beautiful angel”

He went smelled her smell

“What’s your name sweetheart?”

She said nothing

“Ou our beauty is mute ha?”


“There she is, you are not mute, I knew it”

“No I’m not”, she said in a shaky voice

“You look pretty pale honey, are you okay?”

“I’m not pale

“What is it then honey”

“I’m an Albino”

“Albino? What the hell is an Albino?”

She was shocked that he had no idea what an Albino was.

“O , you don’t really know what it is?!”

“No, but maybe you can make an explanation”

She took a deep breath and began to speak

“Albinism is a condition some people and animals are born with. This condition is caused by a lack of pigment (colour) in their hair, eyes, and skin. A person or animal with albinism is called an albino. Many albino people prefer to be called a “person with albinism”. There are ten different types of albinism.
People with albinism can have white or light blonde hair. They can have very pale skin. Their eyes are blue, or rarely pink-ish. People with albinism can have problems such as bad vision and getting sunburnt easily. This is because people with albinism have less pigments in their eyes, skin and hair.Albinism is rare in the United States. One out of every 20,000 people in the United States has albinism. There are about 15,945 people in the United States who have albinism”

When she was finished she took a deep breath and said,

“Oh no I forgot to breathe again”

Negan laughed and was shocked that she did not worry about her own situation. She acted like everything was normal.

“Where do you know this everything?”


He began to laugh

“You are a smart girl and you have humor. I love girls like you?”

“I-I-I have to go”, she said in a shaken voice

She broke from Negan’s grip and walked away with quick steps until she heard Negan’s voice behind her.

“I would be very glad if you would visit me again”

“If I would not disturb you sir,” she said politely

“A come on doll it would be an honor for me”

She smiled at him and disappeared. Negan lay down on the bed, thinking about her beauty.

The weeks passed and Y/N and Negan got to know each other more and more.
Negan could not tell his feelings for her because she was a very shy girl. He wanted time.
One evening Y/N wanted to get something to eat and stand in the line.
There were a lot of people in the Sanctuary who were making fun of her, but she did not care because she was bullied at school too.
It was normal for her. But today it was too much

“Hey, you’re immune, or something why did not you turn to a walker, when were you bitten?”

A Savior said loudly and laughing

She turned to the voice 

“What are you talking about?”

“Are you kidding me look at your death skin. It’s so pale that I sometimes think that they have forgotten to bury you. When did you die tell the truth? ”

Many men began to laugh

“Where is your color sweetheart?”

“How old are you actually because your hair is so white How much 100???”

She had slowly tears in her eyes

“Sometimes I think if you’re a human being or an alien?”

They laughed more
They suddenly heard a whistle and a knocking. It was Negan. He had heard everything.
He quietly called Dwight to his side

“Everyone who has laughed at her and bullied her, you can throw them out to the walkers, they’re hungry,” he said almost screaming

The men becoma scared and went to Negan 

“Negan please, we were just having fun, please do not do that,” they said panicky Negan raised his eyebrows


He looked at Y/N and saw the flowing tears.

“If that was so funny, if it was really fun, why is she crying?”

He said seriously, looking at the men badly.

“I’ll tear anyone’s tongue out that says her something bad. No one can hurt her in my sanctuary, but if someone does they will be punished" 

Simon and Dwight pulled the men out to the walkers.
The men begged Negan, but Negan’s decision did not change. When they were completely gone, Negan held Y/N’s hand and led her to his room.
They sat down on the huge bed. Negan took her face between his hands and wiped her tears with her thumbs.

“Be proud of yourself.”

She looked at him with wet eyes

“I’m ugly”

He was shocked. How could she say something like that. She was the most beautiful woman he ever see.

“Hey hey hey I do not want to hear this again, I love your white skin, I love your rarely pink-ish eyes, I love your light blonde hair, I love your color. I love you the way you are ”

He hugged her, stroked her hair as she cried even more.

“Sssshhhh, I’m with you now, I’ll never leave you in my life, do you hear me, I promise you”

“I love you,” she said in a weeping voice

At that moment, Negan’s men were eaten outside by the Walkers.

Note: Be proud of who you are. Don’t be ashamed. Albinism is beautiful❤

Model: Beata V.

this is mostly for @cafecliche‘s benefit but anyway this is called “icegays - safeword joke” because there’s only so much weird subby victor fic I can take. Let alone “homie, is this a fic, or is it a SSC manual thinly disguised as a fic for a popular fandom????”

Still a rough draft but also I had to copy it over from notebook, so more or less edited but unbetaed.

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anonymous asked:

Hows it going lovely?? Could you do an imagine where batsis's boyfriend cheats on her and she's really upset about it and the batboy plot revenge??

Hi! Sorry for the lack of updates today! I went for supper earlier and now I’ve checked at the hotel I’m staying at. The internet speed is pretty slow so updates might be slow too! Rest assured, I will try to finish some of the requests so when I have decent internet, I can post them up! Anyways, thank you for sending in your request! Hope you enjoy!!

Tim blinks a couple of times as he stares at his brothers. All of them have very tight expressions on their faces – except Damian because Tim thinks that’s just his normal expression – and the atmosphere in the room is grim. They rarely have meetings like this – it’s mostly held in the batcave or at the diner, but this is new. Having a meeting with just the four of them in Tim’s old bedroom – which probably means that the subject for the meeting is you.

“Did something happen to Y/N?” Tim finally voices out his concern.

The pen Jason had been holding broke in half as he glowers. Tim’s alert now – if something had happened to you, why wasn’t he told about it? You are in fact his sister too! “Come on, what’s wrong?”

Dick clears his throat, placing a hand on Tim’s shoulder to calm him down. “Nothing too dire.” Dick reassures Tim and he relaxes a bit. Still it concerns him because he had seen how Jason had reacted earlier so even if something dire did not happen, something must still have happened to you.

“Tt.” Damian shuts his book and puts it aside. “Drake, it seems as if that bastard sister has been dating cheated on her.” Jason lets out a string of curses and this time, Dick had to place his hand on Jason’s shoulders instead. “So this meeting is being held because we want to get revenge.”

Tim’s mouth opens and closes before he stares helplessly at his brothers. “But she… Y/N really liked him!” You have talked to him about this boyfriend – ex-boyfriend! – of yours and Tim was so sure you had been really happy and thinking about your last conversation with him, Tim feels the pain in his chest. You had told him then that you thought you may be in love with the man.

“That fucking shit cheated on her and now Y/N’s really upset and she hasn’t been leaving her room at all!” Jason bursts out. The moment Alfred had told him that you had broken up with your boyfriend because he had cheated on you, he had demanded entry to your room but you only told him to leave you alone for the next few days. It’s almost been a week and he hasn’t seen you at all! In fact, none of your brothers have seen you at all.

Damian shakes his head. “Tt.” He crosses his arms. “I am ready to take my sword to that man – he deserves more than what he has caused sister to go through!” He seethes angrily.

Dick shakes his head. “The reason why we are here is because we don’t want to be killing anyone – (“Don’t lump me with everyone!” Jason protests) – Jason, we really don’t want to be killing anyone. I don’t think that’s what Y/N would want.” Even though he shares the same sentiments as Jason, he still doesn’t think they should be killing anyone. That would just make it all too easy for the man who had made you suffer.

“Okay, so, can anyone run me by what the bastard did then?” Tim asks as he takes out his tablet. “I am going to look him up and uncover all of this dirty secrets! We should hit him where it hurts the most.” Tim is typing away on the tablet.

Dick sighs. He had managed to see you that day you returned – in fact, he had been the one to pick you up because you couldn’t drive due to crying too much. “Y/N found out that he only wanted to date because of the name she carries, the benefits she brings and not only that, Y/N also found out that he’s been screwing one of her closest friends because Y/N – in that bastard’s words – would not put out.”

All hell broke loose then. Everyone is just shouting at everyone and Dick is trying his hardest to calm his brothers down and “Damian, don’t you dare bring Goliath out!” and he is just about to lose when the door slams open and you are standing there looking at your brothers in confusion and annoyance.

“You guys are too noisy.” You tell them before walking in. Everyone is staring at you – treating you like glass – and you let out a sigh. “If you guys are planning on plotting revenge, allow me to be in it as well!” You never like being played as a fool and this guy certainly played you like one!

“Sister, are you alright?” Damian asks, approaching you and you place your hand on top of his head, ruffling his hair.

“I am fine now – I was extremely sad and hurt but now, all I have left is just burning anger.” You should have seen it coming really. He had been very interested in a lot of things about your dad’s business, about your own business, events and everything. You should have trusted your instincts better. “So fire away all of your ideas! I want in.”

Jason sends Dick a smirk. “Now you can’t say no to any of this anymore, not if Y/N wants in too.” He throws an arm around your shoulder. “Don’t worry, Y/N – we’ve got your back.”

You smile for the first time since your breakup. “I know and I’m glad for that. Thank you, everyone.”

thehungryvortigaunt  asked:

Hi! I appreciate your analyses of popular stories (like The Princess Bride), but are you willing to look at video-games that prominently feature torture? Widowmaker of Overwatch is really popular on Tumblr, and I always felt her backstory/characterization invokes some extremely skeevy tropes about torture & femininity. She starts off as a ballerina and 'loving wife' of the leader of a counter-terrorist organization, but is kidnapped by terrorists and "subjected to neural reconditioning." (1/3)

She seems ‘normal’ when rescued, but 2 weeks later her conditioning makes her murder her sleeping husband. She’s then recaptured to complete her brainwashing, with extensive combat training and having her heart slowed to 'numb her emotions’. Despite this backstory of coercion, her behavior as an assassin is quite autonomous and willfully violent (like the devs wanted a female villain BUT absolve her of responsibility.) Only vestige of old personality is her guilt around dead spouse. (2/3) Being 'evil because of torture/mind-rape’ is also the excuse for her wearing a skintight catsuit, despite it not actually factoring into her assassination methods because she’s a sniper. Anyway, I was curious about your opinion not in the 'plausibility’ of any of this BS…but perhaps how to maybe re-write such a character to make her less, uh, cliche?

I am willing to have a go at video games so long as I don’t have to invest cash in the game and dozens of hours playing it for the ask.

And since we’re on the subject while I’m happy to take requests for the Torture in Fiction series I’m going to turn down some of them if I think it would take too long, I can’t get hold of the piece of fiction in question or if it’s something I think I’d really hate for reasons unrelated to torture.

There are probably some very good analytical discussions of the Star Wars prequels to be had but I’m not sure I could sit through them all without serious damage to my television.

I had rather a lot of questions on brainwashing just before I closed the askbox, to the extent that I’m trying to work out how to put together a Masterpost on the subject. One of the things I’ve been trying to come up with is narrative alternatives, more realistic ways to write about characters changing sides.

I’ve talked about why brainwashing doesn’t work before and this question is very much about methods of manipulation that actually work.

So- this is a little divorced from Overwatch and Widowmaker but this is how I would be tempted write a storyline like Widowmaker’s, keeping key elements such as her changing sides and killing her husband without rubbish about brainwashing, being ‘emotionless’ and slowing hearts.

To start with I’d establish the character (let’s call her ‘S’) has some sympathy for the terrorist group before she’s captured. This does not have to mean sympathy for their actions or methods. It can be as simple as an acknowledgement these people are human beings or something to the effect that the political situation is complicated. Good examples would be sentiments along the lines of ‘but that group of people have suffered so much it’s no wonder they turn violent’, ‘but they’re so poor they probably don’t have any other prospects’, ‘but the government they started out fighting against was awful’.

Note that none of these sentiments necessarily lead to support of a terrorist group or its actions. What they show is a willingness to recognise that these terrorists are people.

S is then captured. I’d have this take place away from both her home and her husband. If possible I’d go for another country entirely. I’d also have it happen quickly and with a minimum of violence. Aunty Scripty’s famous ketamine is a possibility. Others include spiking her drink and then volunteering to drive her home/to the hospital or setting up a fake taxi and locking her inside.

S is taken to a secure location and put in a cell by herself. I would make it two or three times the size of a US solitary cell, with a connected bathroom, a large comfortable bed, other furniture and decorations. I would make it look as far from S’s expectations for a terrorist cell as possible. But there’s no TV and absolutely no internet or outside source of news/information.

Then I’d introduce her to ‘A’. A is young, female, pretty, highly intelligent, extremely articulate and appears to be very sympathetic. She’s been part of the terrorist cell for years.

The first time A shows up she apologises for keeping S alone in there. You see the terrorists are really worried that if they keep S near the other prisoners she’ll get hurt. This is for her safety. If plausible I’d also have A claim that they weren’t trying to snatch S and that she was mistaken for someone within her husband’s organisation.

A is very accommodating. She wants to make sure S is alright. Is the food OK? Does she want any more books?

In fact A comes by for an hour or two every day, may be several times a day, just to talk and make sure S is doing alright.

For the first month or so they don’t talk about the terrorist group or the organisation S’s husband is part of, though A will always reassure S that her husband is alright.

Then, once they’ve built up a friendly relationship, A will casually mention one day that she finds it hard to believe a woman as nice and kind as S could ever have anything to do with that awful organisation her husband runs. And S will be surprised. She’ll probably protest that the organisation is made up of good people doing good work. A will look sad.

Over the next few months they’ll talk about the organisation more and more. A has a very different view of them. And she’ll talk, reluctantly, about how the organisation are butchers. She’ll tell S about ‘atrocities’ committed all over the world. She’ll talk about rape and enslavement, destruction of whole villages and poisoned water supplies.

And S will say that it isn’t possible. They’d never do a thing like that.

And slowly, very slowly, A will start to prove her ‘wrong’. She’ll bring in phones with video interviews of people crying about the horrible things the organisation did. She’ll bring in photographs of mounds of dead bodies. She’ll bring in any information the terrorist cell can fake.

Over months she’ll persuade S that the organisation is bad.

And S will insist that her husband can’t possibly know about this. And A will look sad.

Now their conversations will shift again, A will start talking more and more about things the terrorist organisation are doing. She’ll say some of the atrocities they’re accused of are lies and she’ll excuse some of them, because they’re a small group, they don’t have the best weapons, they don’t have that much money- What else could they do?

She’ll also talk about all the ‘good’ the terrorist organisation has done. She’ll probably have a heart wrenching personal story about how they saved her life, literally or metaphorically. She’ll talk about all the people she’s ‘helped’ since joining. How it’s given her life meaning.

A’s more willing to talk about the news now. She’ll tell S all sorts of awful things the organisation is doing. And when A leaves each day S won’t be sure who she’s hoping will ‘win’ any more.

Next A will start introducing the idea that S’s husband knows. That he’s behind much of this. She’ll listen to S’s stories about him and work in the details she’s learnt about how he talks, how he acts. She’ll weave him into her latest tales of the organisation’s recent atrocities.

And she’ll be so so sorry to have to tell S all this.

After a year or so they’ll start letting S out of the cell. She’ll help A with A’s ‘regular duties’ which should be simple, non-violent, things like cooking in the mess hall or cleaning up the pathetic ramshackle ‘hospital’ the terrorists have put up.

A will be very careful who she lets speak to S. (The wrong word at this stage could destroy everything).

S will find she enjoys this unpaid work far more than she enjoys being alone in her cell.

A will not encourage her to become violent and angry. If A has done her job correctly she won’t have to. She’ll talk about the destruction of cities by the organisation and S will volunteer to help build bombs.

Then after two or three years of this, S is ‘rescued’.

She’s home. She’s with her husband again.

She can’t stop thinking about A.

She’s awkward, hesitant and distant. She insists that the terrorists didn’t hurt her and she doesn’t engage with therapy. She distrusts the mainstream news.

She asks her husband strange, open ended questions. ‘What happened on the mission to x last year?’ ‘And the mission to y?’

Her husband shrugs. He might give her a couple of brief overviews but he’s probably not supposed to talk about his missions in detail. So he says they were normal missions.

And S lies next to him at night thinking about the photos of bodies, the people in the videos who cried. She thinks about the smiling terrorists in the mess hall thanking her for their lunch and the bandaged children in the hospital.

And then one night she puts a kitchen knife under her pillow and stabs her husband through the heart while he sleeps.

She showers. She puts on clean clothes. She packs a bag.

And she walks away.

She finds A is waiting.

A’s role is creepy, manipulative and completely immoral but ultimately this transformation, these actions are S’s choice.

There’s no force and no violence. Keeping S isolated means that she’s more likely to become dependant on A because without A she is literally alone. It could, potentially, turn her relationship with A into the most important thing in her world. That would be the ideal outcome for the people manipulating her.

There’s a lot of lying and misrepresenting information and limiting S’s access to information. That happens in real cults and real terrorist organisations.

But despite all that, murdering her husband and going back to the terrorist cell are ultimately the character’s choice. The trick is showing the readers why she’s making that choice, how she got to that point.

That’s how I’d write it.


Locked In

Part 3 of this ask!

Description: Phan AU where Dan just broke up with his girlfriend and he and Phil are platonic pallios who are in the process of moving. (like in real life) They head to Walmart to buy shitty, cheap furniture and end up spending the night.

Genre: Smut

Word Count: 1116

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Sanvers Week Day 3 - “You’re Drunk”

Ahhh, this was so rushed and not great, so sorry! This week is a challenge but I’m loving it.

Cw: mentions of internalised and external homophobia, biphobia, racial and anti-LGBT slurs

Maggie had told her that for a while, everything would be shiny.

And it was. God, it was.

Every kiss had felt like coming home. Suddenly she was constantly noticing people on the subway who she suspected could be gay. Her friends had all laughed when Maggie mercilessly crushed Winn at pool. She’d unlocked a huge part of herself, figured herself out, and maybe now that she had this piece, things would come easy.

But now? Now there were cracks in the surface, and Maggie wasn’t perfect, and their relationship wasn’t perfect, and their community wasn’t perfect.

Of the three, the last was the one that surprised her.

Alex has said it more than once – that coming out had made her feel like a kid again – but it wasn’t just her attraction to Maggie that was destabilising. It was also her new-found cluelessness, the feelings and identities she was only just learning all the big words for, the rawness of the emotions she’d unwittingly buried for years without ever knowing it.

Alex has always prided her on being a quick study (something Maggie had been jokingly praising her for in bed lately), but even she found the process of discovering a new community, a new history, overwhelming. A lot of what she learned felt like someone handing her scissors after a life of trying to tear things open with her teeth. But some of it? Some of it made her scared. Some of it made her ashamed.

She was letting it get the better of her one night at the bar, several whiskey shots deep after straight losses at pool, when it first came up. “Are you mad at me?” she’d asked Maggie.

“What? Why?”

“Because I’m not a gold star?”

Maggie narrowed her eyes, leaned against the pool table. “Where’d you learn that term, Danvers?”

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shinee as aesthetics/feelings

shinee as aesthetics/feelings

Lee Jinki: That moment when you’re laughing so hard that you start crying. Staying up late at night to watch your favorite TV show or read a book. Eating your favorite food after a long while without doing so. Getting those butterflies when you see a stranger and they’re cute. That moment when you take off your clothes after a long day and it just feels nice. Summer dates with lots of popsicles and music. Relaxing mornings when you just feel like everything is how it is supposed to be. That warmth that goes through your body and makes your heart race when you talk about something that you like a lot. When someone teases you and you just laugh because they’re right. Not wearing any makeup as you lay in your bed with your closest friends and eat whatever you could order for takeout. Doing something and then realizing it was stupid so you laugh at yourself.

Kim Jonghyun: When you listen to that really old song that you used to like and you learn to love it again. That moment when you see a picture from your childhood and you just laugh because it’s ridiculous. Reaching a goal and then being so happy about it because you did it. Looking at things and realizing how the most simplistic of sceneries can hold so much beauty, just like the moon or the sun. Mischievous smiles that hold a joking manner as you get ready to surprise someone. That eye roll thing you do as you smile when someone says something that it’s stupid but you can’t help but think it’s cute because they’re so wrong but they sound right saying it. Pastel colors as a meaning of fluffiness and softness. That feeling you get after a really long, great hug and you just feel like you took a weight out of your shoulders. When you see a really cute puppy/kitten and you can’t help but change your voice.

Kim Kibum: Laughing loudly because it was funny and you can. Wearing your favorite piece of clothing and feeling like it looks so good on you so you feel good with yourself. Doing something great for somebody without expecting anything in return, just because. The sound of water as the waves hit one another when the sunset is barely appearing. Laughing at your mistakes and rolling your eyes when you find out that you’ve changed and it was probably for the better. Having really long conversations about anything and everything with someone that actually listens to your point of view and gives you theirs without hurting any feelings. Eating your favorite dessert and enjoying it to the last bit. Singing your favorite song in public and not giving a damn if someone listens because it’s your song. Travelling, whether it is to that city right beside you or another country, just travelling around the world.

Choi Minho: Running, not for the sake of exercising, but simply because you enjoy it and you want to feel like you can do it all. That moment when a really cute kid passes by you and you smile brightly because they’re cute. Feeling free, like you were just the person you wanted to be and the only one you have to make happy is yourself. Blowing kisses and giving really warm hugs to that person you love. A first time of everything, because it’s never too late to learn. That moment you just sit down to watch your favorite show or just search on the internet and you lost track of time. Not having an answer to everything and laughing when you don’t know what to say. Really big sweaters that cover you completely. Nights of autumn with lots of hot drinks and the smell of cinnamon. Really dumb jokes that make you laugh like an idiot. Looking at your friend as if asking for help when you don’t know what to do.

Lee Taemin: Trying your hardest in everything you do and seeing something come from it. The color white, not exactly for the meaning of purity, but honesty and humility. That moment when your heart feels warm when you look at what you’ve created in your life and you’re truly thankful. Variety, not letting a concept take over your life as you try everything and anything just for the sake of looking for that special aura of yours. Eating a lot after a long week and just smiling to yourself because everything just tastes amazing. Those really quiet laughs that go unnoticed but are the most pure and beautiful. Fingers going through each other’s hair to soothe the other’s pain, showing love and support. A look in someone’s eyes that shows determination and mystery, the best of everything in just a pair of eyes. Slow, melodic songs with some hidden message behind them, a meaning that no one will ever know.

mysticmessofcrap  asked:

Asthmatic MC about to have sex with RFA (V+Saeran included) but they start to have an asthma attack. Like, they can't breath and they have to get talked through it to breath again.

Thank you so much for the ask :D It was rather challenging, since I don’t know much about asthma so I had to ask my best friend Google for help there, but I like a challenge. I also hope that it’s okay that not all of them ‘talked her through it’ per se…some people handle stress situation better than others :P



♬ you were very excited as Zen was above you, giving you that dirty smirk you knew meant fun

♬ he began trailing kisses down your body, nibbling at skin and leaving his mark

♬ you weren’t allowed to do that, because he’d just have to cover it up with make-up, but he fucking loved doing it to you

♬ a private mark to remind him that you were his

♬ he kissed your thighs, his hot breath tickling your skin

♬ you could feel the arousal soaring through you, heart rate picking up

♬ when he goes down on you it’s like an explosion, really

♬ he’s damn good at it, sucking and licking at your clit while fingering you

♬ that is when you first start noticing that maybe you gasping for air wasn’t just a reaction to the overwhelming pleasure

♬ you brush it off at first

♬ you haven’t had an asthma attack in years

♬ instead you attempt to focus on the pleasure, rocking onto his wicked tongue licking inside of you now

♬ that is when you start to notice that damn familiar tight feeling in your chest

♬ soon followed by panting

♬ and then the damn wheezing sets in

♬ fuck

♬ you feel Zen freeze between your legs and look up at you in confusion

♬ you know what he must be thinking right now; what kind of unsexy sex noises is she producing

♬ what you didn’t expect was to him to immediately stop and to pull you up into a sitting position

♬ he kneeled in front of you, looking up at you with worry in his eyes

♬ he cupped your face, inspecting you before nodding with determination

♬ apparently he figured out what exactly the problem was

♬ “Do you have an inhaler with you?”

♬ you tried to answer, but only more wheezing came out so you shook your head

♬ another short nod on his part

♬ “Breathe with me. In. Out. In. Out. In. Out. 3 seconds in, hold it and 3 seconds out. Yes, just like that.”

♬ he talked you through the entire thing and you’ve never been more thankful for anything

♬ or more embarrassed, for that matter

♬ you apologized a couple of times, but he stopped you every time

♬ “The only thing you should be apologizing for is not having told me you used to have asthma attacks”, he says, voice gentle.

♬ Despite you reassuring him that you were alright he insisted on bringing you to the nearest hospital

♬ not only that, but he carried you there

♬ in his arms

♬ the entire way

♬ once there the doctor gave you a new inhaler, suggested some treatments and told Zen he did good

♬ it made him feel proud to know he’d done good by you

♬ you thanked him for a kiss to the cheek

♬ he blushed

♬ “Lucky for you actors get stage fright so I know about a million different way to breathe and calm you down!”


★ when the two of you decided to finally share your first time together both of you were nervous

★ neither of you really knew what you were doing

★ it didn’t matter though, since you loved each other and were happy to share such a special moment

★ you’d gone about it a little methodically, reading up on the internet, preparing condoms, lube, music and such

★ you were still nervous though, because you’d read that the first time hurt and you were so bad with pain

★ both of you decided that it was best to start with making out, take your time and get into it

★ everything was fine at first

★ you were kissing, slow and sweet

★ then things started becoming a little more heated, passion taking over, tongues fighting for dominance

★ you could feel yourself getting wet, turned on, but also breathless

★ when he broke the kiss and started kissing down your neck your breath started to get faster

★ and faster

★ and faster

★ and yet your lungs didn’t seem to be filling with air

damn it

★ you began wheezing and apparently that got Yoosung’s attention because he stopped and stared up at you

★ had this not been such a serious situation, you might have laughed at his expression

★ he looked like a deer caught in the headlight, really

★ sadly this wasn’t funny and breathing became even harder

★ then Yoosung started to panic as well, gripping your shoulders and shaking you

★ what on earth was he doing

★ “Oh my God, breathe! You have to breathe! Oh God, oh God, oh God, oh God.”

★ you sincerely hoped that animals didn’t have asthma…because they would have been dead

★ “Oh God, you’re not breathing. Why aren’t you breathing?”

★ possibly because he was shaking you like a rag-doll, but you weren’t quite sure

★ when he noticed that telling you to breathe and calm didn’t help when he himself was a wreck of nerves and anxiety you began pointing towards your bag

★ luckily you still carried your inhaler

★ at first he was confused but after about half a minute he finally got what you were getting at

★ he ran towards your bag and took the poor thing apart until he finally found the inhaler

★ he handed it to you, watching you take a puff from it every thirty seconds

★ usually you’d only have to do it once a minute, but he’d gotten you worked up

★ after ten puffs you stop, finally feeling like you can breathe again, and exhale

★ meanwhile Yoosung is kneeling in front of you, head hanging low

★ you reach out and brush through his messy hair

★ “I really messed that up, didn’t I? Man, I’m sorry. I promise I’ll do better next time.”


♨ this woman is literally prepared for anything, even things you’d never expect

♨ when you first decided to have sex with one another you were both knew to it

♨ not sex, but sex with other women

♨ you’d gone in head first, Jaehee had read up on it on the internet

♨ you were a good team, calm meeting crazy

♨ which is why it didn’t surprise you at all when she pulled out an inhaler during your asthma attack

♨ you’d been getting cozy on the couch, watching the latest of Zen’s play on DVD

♨ one thing led to the other and you were kissing

♨ you were straddling Jaehee, grinding against her in desperate need for friction

♨ it felt great and you wanted more than just that, wanted to feel her against you bare and naked

♨ the thought got you aroused, worked up even

♨ sadly, a little too much, as it seemed

♨ suddenly you found herself coughing and wheezing

♨ the fact that you were having an asthma attack when it’d been years worked you up

♨ you got nervous, and the symptoms got worse

♨ luckily Jaehee reacted quickly

♨ she gently pushed you off herself to sit upright on the couch

♨ she calmly disappeared for a couple of seconds only to return from the bathroom with an inhaler in hand

♨ you didn’t have a lot of time to worry about where she’d gotten it from or why

♨ you accepted it, putting it into your mouth and inhaled

♨ meanwhile she held up her wrist, staring at her watch

♨ “You’re not too far gone so I’d say one puff every forty seconds should be enough.”

♨ You had no idea how she remained so calm, but you appreciated it a lot

♨ “Take another puff exactly…now!”

♨ you did and about five minutes later you felt much much better

♨ once you could breathe and talk again you couldn’t help but ask

♨ Jaehee merely shrugged, a sweet blush to her cheeks

♨ “I noticed that you run out of breath at work much quicker than I do. I wasn’t sure whether I was right with my asthma theory, but when I googled the symptoms did add up and I’d rather be safe than sorry.”


♛ it had taken months to convince Jumin to have sex

♛ even just thinking it made you feel dirty

♛ not that he’d been repelled by you or the idea of sex with you, but he really wanted to wait until marriage

♛ when you explained to him that you weren’t quite ready to say yes though, he soon caved

♛ maybe the cat ears, tail and little bell to wear around your neck had something to do with it too…

♛ but who cares about minor details like that

♛ the second he came home and saw you in that outfit, his moral soon flew out of the window

♛ honestly, he just did it because he wanted to be better than his father anyway

♛ Jumin had admitted to never having had sex before, so you’d been worried it might not be good

♛ you worried for nothing, let me tell you

♛ you couldn’t tell whether he’d watched porn recently or read up on it or whether it was just pure talent

♛ but he was wicked good and you hadn’t even been naked at that time

♛ he was worshipping your body, touching you everywhere, feathery light

♛ caressing every inch of skin he could get his hands on, always tender and loving

♛ you were so overwhelmed with emotion you felt like you might actually cry

♛ especially when he stopped the naughty bits to press a kiss to your hand, just as a reminder that it wasn’t just about sex

♛ that is when you felt like all air got sucked out of your lungs…

♛ …and no new air was coming in

♛ how unfortunate

♛ he’d stopped when he’d noticed something was off, that you’d gone tense

♛ you weren’t wheezing yet, but from how you remembered your attacks, it would set in soon

♛ Jumin was looking at you, frowning slightly as he didn’t seem to understand what the issue was

♛ when you gasped out for an inhaler, it quickly made click

♛ he got out his phone and called for his servants employees to get you an inhaler

♛ while waiting for them he talked you through the attack

♛ his voice had always been low and soothing, but in that moment it was even more so

♛ by the time someone came the inhaler you were mostly calmed down again

♛ he still told you to take a puff or two for good measures

♛ “See, that is what happens when you have sex before marriage. Now please tell your doctor to send me your medical records immediately. I need to take precautions.”


☼ he’d been holed up in his room for almost a week

☼ apparently working on some virus that was harder to program than he’d anticipated

☼ when he’d finally come out, Seven had been stressed and tense

☼ you’d figured it’d be a nice gesture to…relief some of the stress

☼ you’d pushed him down onto the couch, straddling him

☼ after making out for a while, things turning heated rather quick, you decided to climb down and go

☼ you went on his knees, ready to give him the blowjob of his life

☼ Seven’s looked wrecked from the kiss alone, so you were hoping that would blow his mind entirely

☼ his eyes were half lidded, lips parted and spit slick and God was that vision hot

☼ when you took him into your mouth he moaned, hand coming to fist your hair

☼ you groaned around his length, sending vibrations down his shaft

☼ apparently he liked that a lot, because he bucked his hips and thrust into your mouth

☼ you didn’t like that

☼ mainly because for even just a split second you felt like you were choking

☼ and that set you off

☼ you found yourself pulling off, panting and gasping for air

☼ then the wheezing set in and Seven finally reacted

☼ not that it was optimal

☼ in his half-panic he reached for an empty bag of Honey Buddha Chips and pressed it to your mouth

☼ you really would have loved to been able to roll your eyes

☼ however, all you could was breathe in and out of the damn bag

☼ you could still taste the faint note of chips with every breath

☼ eventually you’d calmed down enough to get rid of the bag, glaring daggers at your idiot of a boyfriend

☼ “Did you seriously just press a dirty chips bag against my face to breathe into?”

☼ at least he had the decency to look ashamed, scratching the back of his head nervously

☼ “Not really clever of me. In my defense, I’m sleep deprived. Still…not my prouder moment. Sorry.”


☀ You were lying in bed, wrapped up in your own world

☀ making out with Saeran was something you appreciated a lot

☀ for one it took a lot of trust in you to let you this close

☀ he also was a great kisser

☀ whether it be feathery light and just a brush of lips or passionate, licking into your mouth and claiming it with his tongue

☀ this time, however, you were surprised when he began touching you

☀ his hand disappeared under your shirt, slowly roaming upwards

☀ his touch left a pleasant shiver behind wherever it went

☀ when his hand wrapped around your bare breast, fingers playfully twisting your nipple you gasped

☀ you arched into the touch, biting your lip to muffle any embarrassing sounds

☀ you hadn’t been touched like that in a long time, so your body was hypersensitive

☀ suddenly his hand was gone though and you were about to pout when you felt it sneak under your skirt and ~ oh!

☀ He used two fingers to push inside you while his thumb circled your clit

☀ it took your breath away

☀ which was fine, until he literally took your breath away

☀ this attack came so fast you barely saw it coming

☀ clutching your chest you gasped for air

☀ Saeran just blinked and calmly removed his hand from your body

☀ he then turned around leaving you facing his back

☀ you felt hurt for a moment, almost close to tears until suddenly he turned back and pressed an inhaler between your lips and pressed it, forcing you to inhale a deep breath

☀ a minute later he did it again, expression almost eerily calm and neutral

☀ you calmed soon after, still staring at him with wide eyes though

☀ what had just happened?

☀ when you asked him where he’d gotten the inhaler from he told you he’d brought it a couple of months ago

☀ you asked him whether he had asthma but he said that wasn’t the case, leaving you even more confused

☀ “I hacked into your medical record and saw that you had asthma so I took care of it. I need you alive. you also didn’t tell me you were allergic to eggs. That was reckless of you.”

☀ you just kind of gaped at him at that admission

☀ well, he certainly had a unique way of showing you that he loved you

☀ “And look, I got it in your favourite colour too.”

Jihyun Kim/V

📷 the entire day you’d felt somewhat breathless

📷 it had been rather stressful at the party, so you figured that must have been the reason

📷 especially as you’d watch V get on stage to sell his last photographs

📷 now he had none saved and left to sell and was incapable of taking more

📷 while he’d moved on from Rika and you’d actually gotten him to agree to the surgery, it’d been to late

📷 at that point, a couple of years after the actual incident, the doctors had said there was nothing they could do anymore, it was permanent

📷 you figured the heavy feeling on your chest was your heart sinking at said fact

📷 when you’d gotten home you’d still felt somewhat sad, but V had just laughed and shaken his head

📷 he’d seen this event as something to be celebrated, to be happy about

📷 after all he’d been able to follow his dreams and passions and take photographs until the very end

📷 when he put it that way, you couldn’t help but agree

📷 you’d kissed him then, innocent and light

📷 V, however, had other things in mind

📷 soon you’d found yourself pressed against the nearest wall, a leg between yours for you to grind against

📷 you shamelessly did so, panting and gradually getting more out of breath

📷 by the time you noticed what was going on, that you’d been wrong about those signs throughout the day it was too late

📷 the asthma attack hit you hard, the weight on your chest almost unbearable, forcing you to your knees

📷 you’d felt like you were suffocating and no matter how often you took breaths, nothing stuck

📷 to your surprise, V had remained completely calm

📷 he’d followed you on your knees and didn’t come too close, instead keeping enough distance to let you breathe

📷 he breathed along with you, showed you how to do it, soother you with his calm words

📷 when you’d calmed enough not to choke on him he got up and returned with an old looking inhaler

📷 you’d taken a couple of puffs and handed the inhaler back

📷 “I used to have asthma as a kid. This thing is old though, so we better get you a new one just in case.”


I’m sorry if there are some mistakes, I’m hella tired at this point and have been staring at this for hours XD I really hope you like it nevertheless 

home is where the wifi connects automatically

Word count: 8.5k

Rating: G

Summary: The wifi at Dan’s parents’ house is utter crap, which is definitely why he’s always so miserable when he visits his family for Christmas. Because of the wifi. (Or at least, that’s what he chooses to tell himself.)

Warnings: food, swearing, family-related angst, someone getting mildly drunk

Notes: Each section is labeled with the year in which it’s set, so for clarity’s sake, pay attention to that.

Dedicated to spider, of course <3

[Read on AO3]


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Vital: Part One - Terra (A Yondu x Reader Fic): Chapter 6/?: How Long (Has This Been Going On)

Click here for: Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five

Rated M for language and future NSFW chapters (these will be marked as such).

Yay! Two chapters in one day ;)

A/N: Not sure if any of you have noticed, but I’m trying to make all the chapter titles named after songs from the 50s-80s. Both the song title and the band are mentioned in the tags.

“Ok, food’s in the fridge, garbage is out, laundry’s in the dryer….” You tick items off your fingers that have kept you running around all morning. You pop into the bathroom to fix your hair, and head downstairs.

Yondu is working on his arrow on the couch, and he turns as he hears you come down. His eyes widen, taking you in. You’re wearing a dress with leggings underneath and some flat shoes – nothing fancy, but your hair is in a French braid, you’ve got earrings on, and you’re wearing more makeup than you usually do. You blush, ducking your head to avoid his stare. “Damn, ya look great, sweetheart.”

You let out a nervous giggle and smile. “Thanks.” You sling your purse over your shoulder, and your phone rings from where it’s charging on the dining room table.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

hiii I love and appreciate your blog ❤️!! I was wondering if you can do a hc where both jimin and jungkook are popular but hang out w diff people but they have a thing for eachother they just haven't made it official and everyone just knows they're pining for eachother and ship them sm!! can you maybe do suuper nice and angelic jimin while jungkook is all sports and stuff <3 happy ending please 💞

thank youuu ofc i will do my best! i hope you don’t mind, but i’m gonna take some liberties with this and make it into a social media thing! where they both run popular youtube channels and they both like each other and all their fans and friends think they’re cute and ship them lmao. i may be inspired by jo’s social media/vlogger au ( @shyjimins thanks ily) PS - this might be really long, i’m having fun. update: it’s so fucking long i sorry.

+ “TAEHYUNG HOLY SHIT!!” jungkook called out. “dude i’m right here why are you yelling??” taehyung said. jungkook turned his laptop screen around showing taehyung what he was so excited about. 

Keep reading

One Day at a Time

Request: Sam soulmate AU where you and he share a mark on your body

Characters: Sam x Reader

A/N: Another long overdue request. I apologize that its not exactly up to par but I’m trying to get back into the writing game so please be understanding and let me know what you think

Originally posted by hunterchesters

The now black skin swirled in and out of the paler skin, as if basket weaving itself to you, as if it weren’t nearly a mark upon your skin but rather a part of you.

Or perhaps it wasn’t trying to attach itself to you but rather escape from you, perhaps that thing was you.

But no that couldn’t be, the witch had said she was doing you a favor by giving it to you so she couldn’t have meant to take anything away from you. But could you really take a witch at her word? She had just spent the last hour torturing you surely she meant it sarcastically.

You ran your thumb softly over it, it felt like your skin, maybe it really was you. Maybe it was your soul, working its way to flee your body, slipping through the new formed gaps in your skin. Maybe-

You thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door shortly followed by the turning of the door knob. You quickly shielded your wrist from view behind your body just as a tall, long haired, brown eyed moose appeared in your doorway.

“Hey y/n” he offered a small, sympathetic smile as he came to sit next to you on your bed, his eyes never leaving yours as he crossed the room.

“Hey Sam” you croaked slightly, unable to keep your weakness from showing through your voice.

You could see the worry in his expression as he searched your eyes for answers he knew you wouldn’t give him “Are you sure you’re ok?”

“course Sam” You tried to smile, with all your might you willed one onto your face but could manage no more than a slight tug on the corners of your mouth “I’ve been through much worse trust me”

That seemed to do nothing to console him as he sighed slightly “Still…you know it’s alright if you’re not”

“not what”

“not ok”

Of course, it wasn’t alright. You were a hunter for gods sake. It was your job to protect people from an enemy they don’t know exists. People were dying, of course you couldn’t take a second to worry about your unimportant injuries. It was nothing bad, a few cuts here, bruises there, and of course the mark but neither brother needed to know about that, it was your cross to bear so to speak. But of course you couldn’t tell Sam this, you didn’t need a lecture on how you needed to take care of yourself before you can take care of anyone else and you especially didn’t need Sam to see anymore weakness in you then he already did.

“I know Sam but really I’m fine” You fought the urge to take his hands in your own, squeezing them softly and looking into his eyes to prove to him that you were fine, but of course you weren’t and this simple action alone could prove just that to him “I just need some time to myself you know?”

Sam nodded, casting his gaze to the floor “Of course Y/N take all the time you need” He looked back up at you with those gorgeous puppy dog eyes that nearly broke you “Just let me know if I can do anything ok?”

Oh, how you wanted to cup his face in your hand and console him, softly rub your thumb over his cheek and tell him that everything was perfect because you clearly weren’t the only one in pain here. “Of course, Sam”

He nodded again, looking back down at the floor before pushing himself to his feet and leaving the room without a word, shutting your door behind him.

You bit your lip harshly as your shoulders slumped, you were not going to cry, crying solved nothing.

A month had passed before you were ready to admit defeat. You’d gone through every book in the library and every article the internet had to offer.

It’d been just as long since you’d been on a hunt with the Winchesters, nearly that long since you had had an actual conversation with them.

Which was why, at least in part, you were so nervous to be sitting in front of them today asking for their help.

You hadn’t even said a word yet but you could see you were the sole object of their attention as they sat in mirrored postures, back rigid and straight with slightly clenched jaws and eyes on you.

“I-uh” you stuttered, wondering how best to approach the topic of you lying to them for an entire month before you decided it was best to just rip the band aid off. With a deep breath you raised your hand and set it on the table with your wrist up, showing them your mark this time with no makeup or long sleeves to hide it.

The two were silent as they just stared at it, Dean in confusion while Sam in what seemed to be shock, his mouth hanging open slightly as his hands fumbled with something in his lap.

Finally, Dean decided to break the silence “So you got a tattoo?”

You shook your head, not drawing your eyes from your wrist to look at either of them “No…it just sort of-“


Now it was your turn to be shocked as you looked up at Sam to see him place his hand on the table with the exact same mark staring up at you.

“Wha-where did you-“ You couldn’t even bring yourself to finish a sentence, so in shock to see the exact same mark on someone else’s wrist. How could he have it as well? You were alone when the witch gave it to you.

“It just sort of appeared, shortly after that witch case about a month ago” You could see that he was purposefully not meeting your eyes, forcing himself to stare at your wrist.

“That witch…she gave it to me…said she was doing me a favor” You spoke in small, broken batches of words, desperately trying to understand what was happening.

You kept your eyes on Sam as Dean spoke next “So what does this mean?”
At this he looked back at you with what was quite possibly the most sympathetic look you had ever seen only causing you to be more confused. “I-I”

At this Sam’s expression changed drastically into one of realization “You don’t know?” He breathed the words out sending an unpleasant chill down your spine as you shook your head.

“Y/n…it means we’re soul mates”

You felt all the air leave your lungs as you stared back at him in shock, your mouth hanging open slightly “soulmates?”

“I looked around for answers” Sam said softly, his eyes casting back down to the table “People say when a mark like this appears on your skin your destined to be with whoever has the matching one”

You nodded slowly, taking deep breaths as you thought this through. You and Sam, soulmates. You were destined to be with the man you’ve had a crush on for years. Sam Winchester was your soulmate. You had to fight a smile at the thought of this though your world quickly came crashing back down around you.

“We’ll find a way to get out of this”

You felt your heart leap into your throat as these words left the younger Winchesters mouth.

He moved his hand and placed it on top of your own and looked deeply into your eyes “I promise”


It was all you could think of to say, of course he didn’t want to be with you. Why would he? He was the great Sam Winchester so far out of your league you weren’t sure the two of you were even playing the same sport. Why on earth would he want to be soulmates with plain old you?

Without saying a word, not that you were sure you would be able to, you drew your hand out from under his and left the room, not making eye contact with either of them.

“Y/N wait up”

You could hear his footsteps as he ran to catch up though you neither slowed nor sped up, unsure of if you wanted him to catch you, to try and explain himself to you, but of course he did. He came up beside you and stopped in front of you, putting his hands on your shoulders to keep you from moving. And though you hate to admit it your skin still tingled under his touch.

“Y/N that’s what you want right?”

“Sam it doesn’t matter what I want” You sighed, not daring to look up at him

“You don’t and I’m not going to force you into anything”

“Does this mean you don’t want to stop it”

You only shrugged in response, not looking up until he placed a finger beneath your chin and brought your gaze up to meet his.

“Y/N what do you want”

Your lip wobbled slightly as you struggled to regain your composure. “Look Sam” You sighed “I like you…a lot…have for quite some time so being soulmates doesn’t sound like the worst think in the world”

Sam sighed at this, letting his hands slip off your shoulders causing you to panic slightly again “Y/N I like you too and that’s the problem”

You could feel yourself freeze. How is that a problem Sam?”

“You know my track record Y/N” Sam sighed “My past relationships all end in death”

You could feel anger rising within you as you clenched your jaw “Sam I can take care of myself”

“I know that Y/N believe me I do” He quickly reassured you, his arms falling to his sides “I just can’t risk it, I can’t lose you”

“Even if it means we can never be together”

“Even if”

A moment of silence passed between you two. “Sam all those relationships were in your past, there’s no saying that the same will happen to me”

“And there’s no saying it won’t” Sam was quick to reply “I can’t take that chance”

“And I can’t go back to normal after hearing this” You all but yelled “Sam you can’t let past misfortunes scare you into present decisions”

Another wave of silence passed between you as Sam thought it over, you ready to desperately hang on to whatever comes out of his mouth and ready to refute it immediately if need be.

“Y/N you just mean too much to me”

“And you mean the world to me Sam which is why I’m willing to take this chance, just please tell me you are too”

Sam stopped talking again thinking it over once more before replying “I suppose you are a hunter, you’re in danger no matter what I do”

You chuckled at this, biting your lip “That’s the spirit”

Sam chuckled back in response making you smile “So we’re going to try this whole soulmates thing then?”

“Yeah” You grinned, reaching out and taking his hand in your own “we’ll take it one day at a time”

“I like that”

“Good” You smiled again “Me too”

anonymous asked:

May i have a Nalu, “wtf you’re not my roommate, how did you get in here? oh sHIT you’re really drunk aND NOW YOU’RE CRYING OKay okay it’s okay shhhh, you can stay here i guess??” au. Thanks and have a nice day ^_^

bless you people for having the patience of the gods to deal with me and my slow updates.

I am currently dead inside from having to deal with finals and whatevs but thank god for fanfics to keep me going.

Thanks for the request and whoever you are anon, please enjoy!

Never again.

Never. Fucking. Again.

When next Natsu sees Loke-that stupid pretty bastard-he’s gonna break his nose and strangle him with that furry coat of his.

Natsu knew he shouldn’t have agreed to the party, even in his slightly buzzed thoughts when Loke suggested it, something banged pots and pans screaming at him “NO”, but of course he didn’t listen to the crazy little voice in his head the one time it was saying something smart.

A slice of pain shot through Natsu’s head as his eyes slid open. God he was hungover, in the literal sense and like that movie trilogy with those guys because for one, he couldn’t remember shit from last night.

Two, as he sat up, cracking his back with a satisfied grunt, the place was trashed mercilessly. Like there was cake on the ceiling (who does that? He’s done weird stuff but even then, standards) and something suspiciously like vomit on a spot a few feet from him. Also he was surrounded by empty bottles of Red Stripe.

At least he found his answer to the headache.

And third, like Doug from the first Hangover movie, Loke’s ass was nowhere to be seen. He’d have to check on the roof later to make sure last night really didn’t follow the plot of that movie.

But after his post hangover breakfast. Loke can wait when a cheese omelette and toast is calling.

The journey to the kitchen was longer and harder than he ever imagined, everything was a crutch, holding Natsu up as he hobbled to his goal of a healing meal.

He clutched his chest half way there to catch some breath. His shirt was gone, lost to the events of last night. As was his shoes. And his pants. Natsu was practically naked and he still couldn’t remember a damn thing.

God he hoped none of this made it on the internet.


What the hell was that.


Well either the old fridge was acting up again and decided to start screaming in the early afternoon or someone was here with him, and it didn’t sound like Loke.

Natsu knew what a hungover Loke sounded like and he never sounded this alert.  Well at least whatever it was is in the kitchen. Saves him some energy.

Sparkly red pumps attacked Natsu’s weak eyes, abandoned on the dirty tiles next to bare feet. Bare feet belonging to the woman with her head currently in the sink, groaning and maybe close to throwing up.

Uh……..” Her head flew up, damp blonde hair sticking in clumps to her forehead. Well it looks like someone thought drowning herself was a good way to get rid of a hangover.

“You’re not Cana.” She said, voice raspy with sleep and alcohol.

“Nope. And you’re not Loke are you?”

“Oh thank god no.”Her raspy voice devolved into a fit of giggles. Cute hiccupy giggles. They sounded a little bit like alcohol.

“So i’m guessing this isn’t my apartment either.”

“Bingo.” “Cana isn’t here?” Mystery girl brushed wet hair from her eyes, propping herself up on the counter.

“I haven’t found anyone else yet so i’m guessing no.”

Natsu shouldn’t have said that. He should not have said that. If he were sober he wouldn’t have said that.

Small tears leaked from her eyes making them even redder and puffier. “You mean she left me? Cana went home without me……?” she choked up a sob and he realizes that maybe she’s a bit drunker than he probably thought.

“No wait! I just woke up!” Natsu exclaimed, trying to ease her distress.He shuffled a bit closer. “I haven’t searched the rest of the apartment, your friend might still be in here! We can go look!”

She hiccuped and let out another sob that had his semi-drunk self feeling so helpless and lost that even a few tears started to prickle at the corners of his eyes.

But Natsu held those back. Two people crying usually ended up in a never ending loop of tears. That happened once with Gajeel and he wasn’t gonna go through that again.

“You wanna maybe sit down?” Natsu suggested, “I think I got some orange juice left, you could have that and just take a breather to calm down or if you want I can get you something else to drink.”

She took a heavy breath through her nose to even out her breathing from crying.It took a few more but the tears stopped and Natsu couldn’t help a tiny sigh of relief.

“You ok now?” He asked cautiously.

“Yeah…..sorry about that, I just got a little…..overwhelmed.”

Natsu nodded. “You the emotional drunk?” “Yeah. You?”

“Calm and dead. Not a lot of stuff phases me.”

She gave a slightly sober chuckle. “Looks like we balance each other out. Must be a drunken twist of fate.”

Sh held out her hand and he grasped it with a weak shake. “I’m Lucy and well, sorry about the crying and for being in your place like this.”

He grinned. “No problem, you’re not the first hungover person i’ve dealt with. Had to knock out the first guy though. You want breakfast before we look for your friend?”

“If it’s not too much trouble.” “It ain’t, plus you can tell me about last night ‘cause i can’t remember jack shit. You like cheese omelettes?”

“Who doesn’t?”

Oh god.

That’s not what she think it is written on his chest in her handwriting, in her bright blue lipstick that she got herself on valentines.

“Hey is there something on me? You keep staring.” Natsu eyed her curiously as he shoveled the last of his meal in his mouth.

Yeah…NO! No, no no,no. You’re fine! Everything’s just fine!” Don’t look down, don’t look down, don’t look down

“Really? ‘Cause with how you were looking at me you’d think that there was something…….Did someone draw a dick on me?”

His gaze lowered to roam over his naked chest. He looked.

And no doubt he could read the word ‘MINE’ boldly written on him and see the smeared lipstick mark a little bit further down, close to inappropriateness.

No way….” His eyes shot back up to meet Lucy’s and, dear lord, she must’ve had some still on her lips because his face twisted into something sinister.

“Did you do this?” He asked playfully,cackling at her reddened features.

“We were both really drunk and nothing happened!”

“You sure? Because this looks a bit out -” “Yes I’m sure! Just, stop talking! Our drunk selves are different people who we don’t know and must never speak of!”

Alright, alright.” The argument was dropped but that evil smirk was still plastered on his face. He motioned for her to hand over her empty plate and glass as he moved to the sink.

Water gushed from the faucet as Natsu cleaned up, and of course he just had to close off the issue properly.

“Just for the record Lucy,” he called, “You should probably take someone out to dinner first before calling dibs on them.”

She buried her face in her hands. No way in hell was she gonna tell him about the ‘JUICY’ cheekily peering at her, partially hidden by the band of his boxers.