I have struggled with my insecurities since I can remember, honestly. I have never thought I was pretty, or beautiful, or anything really. I am extremely critical of myself and how I look, and even on my good days, when I look at myself in the mirror, I see something in my face, or a part of my body, that I wish I could change, or fix, or something. I always thought by 26 I would be more confident, and that I would really be able to love myself. Unfortunately, even at this age, I’m still struggling with my insecurities, and the issues in my head, and it sucks. I hope that one day, I can look at myself in the mirror, and like what I see, I really hope that day will come. So I know sometimes I may post a few too many selfies, but to be perfectly honest, I do that because it’s a challenge for me to overcome. I posted my first selfie last September, when my blog turned 1, and that was a huge step for me. I was so anxious, it was awful. In reality, each time I post a selfie, I expect to receive comments or messages telling me I’m hideous, ugly, or whatever, and also telling me to stop posting selfies at all. And, honestly, I have received anonymous messages like that before, and I won’t lie to you, it hurt to read those messages, because it was basically reinforcing how I already felt about myself and how I look. But, more often than not, I’ve received very kind, supportive, lovely messages about my selfies, and I just wanted to say thank you to anyone who has sent me a nice message, because it really does mean a lot to me, to read something kind, when in my head I’m looking at the picture, seeing everything I don’t like about my face, and regretting posting the picture in the first place.
So, I just wanted to say thank you to everyone out there who has been so nice to me. It’s a lovely thing to receive kindness just because. Hopefully, one day I’ll look at one of my selfies, and like what I see. Until then, I’ll keep posting them, in the hopes that eventually that day will come.