Taking Down The Tree

steve’s middle name is spelled G-R-A-N-T but it’s pronounced ‘trouble’
Every Unanswered PLL Question from every episode

Since I think the Charles is CeCe reveal is fake, I’m going to watch the show from the beginning and see what questions I have. (Any “answers” given in Game Over, Charles are irrelevant to me because I think they’re fake). All answers given in the show will be bolded with the episode it was answered in, in parenthesis. Just a warning this is going to be long hence the show has over 100 episodes. Also, I have a lot of -A related questions that have never been confirmed. Even during Mona’s reign as -A, some things just don’t add up. I know Marlene says that everything from season 1 and until the end of season 2 is Mona and season 3 starts a new -A, but like I said, some things don’t add up.


Pilot (1x01)
Spencer heard someone scream ‘that night’, who was it?
Why did the Montgomery’s leave Rosewood for a year? To get away from Rosewood after Alison went missing. (2x19)
Did Ezra follow/know Aria was going to be at the Hollis Bar & Grill or was he there coincidentally?
Why did Hanna roll her eyes when she waved to Aria in class?
Who was the blonde in Maya’s (Alison’s) room?
How did Hanna start off in the crowd looking at the chaos of Alison’s house when a body was found then ended up behind Spencer and Aria (behind the crowd)?
What’s the “Jenna Thing”? Alison lit a firecracker in the Cavanaugh’s garage while Jenna and her step brother, Toby, were in it. The firecracker ended up blinding Jenna. Alison told the girls to keep it a secret and they let Toby take the blame for it. (1x02)

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You can slow things down. Take a walk without your phone, go swimming, wade, climb a tree, balance a glass of water on your head, collect wood, carry water, read a book, hold a rock and feel it’s shape, breathe, listen to the wind, watch the moon, feel an itch on your body and let it just be itchy, fold your clothes, breathe some more. How do you slow things down? This is all a reminder for myself.

The Tree God

I’m the DM with a two-person party. One player has had some experience with DnD, but for the other, it’s his first time.

And on every tree-related roll, our axe-paladin has gotten 20s.

Part 1

Me (DM): Ok, the path goes either right, or left. What do you do? 

Paladin: I go forward.

Me: No, I mean, there is only right and left on the path. The rest is just forest.

Paladin: No. I take my axe and go forward by cutting down all the trees.

Me: Fine. Roll.

Paladin: (rolls a 20)

Me: *screams*

Part 2

Me: Ok, (Sorcerer) now has a stick-torch.

Paladin: I want one!

Me: Then just cut off a branch. You’ll need to roll for it, too.

Paladin: (nat 20)

Sorcerer: what?!

Part 3

Me: You are now inside a small cave, about 7 feet across. There is still a hole in the ground from the tree.

Sorcerer: What if an enemy finds us while we sleep? (It’s nighttime) 

Paladin: I’ll just put the tree back.

Me: Uh, sure, roll.

Paladin: (nat 20)

Me: I hate you.

anonymous asked:

Can you do pretty pretty please RFA and MC the floor is lava game? Like, MC would out of nowhere be saying the floor is lava and the guys would have to find something to jump on so the lava wont get them

Hell yeah I can

Edit: V and Saeran added

“The Floor is Lava, RFA!”

Yoosung Kim

  • This game reminded him so much of his childhood and he was ecstatic when you brought it up
  • The poor boy is a disaster.
  • He is falling in fountains, out of trees, knocking over stands, it’s… bad.
  • But the smile on his face when he plays is worth it and you guys are having way too much fun to ever quit anyways
  • He is usually the one who is frantically running around since you get more of a reaction.
  • Yoosungs is always shocked and completely off guard.
  • He doesn’t give his athletic skill enough credit. He is fast
  • Which could also explain why he is always crashing and falling
  • One day you were walking with him in the halls of his college.
  • You just stopped by to pick him up and maybe get lunch after. Innocent, right?
  • “Yoosung, the floor is-”
  • “Wait- Hold on-”
  • “Lava!”
  • Yoosung panicked since there was like no where to go since the halls were all empty and clean
  • So he leaped and grabbed a hold of the exit sign and it broke
  • You guys don’t talk about it.

Zen

  • “Hyun the floor is lava.”
  • “You are so cute. It’s just warm because the sun is finally out!”
  • Zen has seen a couple of videos about it on social media but he didn’t really think too much of it. He thought the trend was dead.
  • But after telling him a couple of times, he finally realizes that you actually want to play and he is excited.
  • Out of everyone in the RFA, he is ranked 2nd on the extra scale
  • He wants to show off to you and impress you with how fast he gets onto things.
  • Constantly wanting to beat his previous time
  • So he kinda forgets the innocence and fun of the game but at least doesn’t go anywhere illegal
  • Zen likes making you jump around instead since you find the most creative spots
  • He sometimes panics because he doesn’t want you to accidentally get hurt so he avoids playing it in busy public places if possible
  • You got stuck on top of his fridge once and he couldn’t help you because he was too busy laughing
  • It’s payback for the time you laughed when his hair got caught on some tree branches. It was so tangled he thought he would have to cut it off.
  • Luckily that wasn’t the case

Jaehee Kang

  • Have you seen a grown woman in a pencil skirt and 6in heels climb a tree to impress her sweetheart? Now you have.
  • You would think she would be all flustered and embarrassed but no.
  • She is so competitive and badass no one wants to stop her
  • After working for Jumin, she has gone through many stressful / humiliating moments and learned to just be professional and confident in anything
  • The only rule is you can’t play at the coffee shop. Other than that it’s free game.
  • Jaehee just gets such a thrill trying to find something to climb something under 5 seconds.
  • She feels like a child and she loves it.
  • If she has to climb to the top of that playground with 2 seconds remaining she will.
  • When you guys go to shopping to restock or decorate the coffee shop, that’s when it gets rough.
  • She doesn’t aim to get kicked out, but if she so happens to climb on the aisle, it gets a little risky.
  • You guys have only been escorted out in one store because you accidentally knocked everything off it’s shelf.
  • Jaehee still giggles about it to this day.

Jumin Han

  • Oh dear God.
  • Everyone knows that Jumin would do literally anything for you and if swallowing his pride to play this jungle gym game every time you leave the house then so be it.
  • “Jumin! The floor is lava~!”
  • Straight face, red cheeks,  he is pushing people, and boy he is on top of that table in 5 seconds flat.
  • He holds enough power and confidence where people do not question him. That doesn’t stop all the pictures taking though.
  • Save him.
  • Jumin mostly likes it when you are the one that’s forced to run around. You look so cute with your shocked face and panicked moving.
  • This game is so fun for him. Jumin loves it because he is connecting to that inner child that never got to play ridiculous games.
  • Once he’s got the hang of it though, he is kinda brutal.
  • One time you two went to a classic party at the workplace and it was all going well until your phone alerted you with a text.
  • “I would get off the tile if I were you. It’s made out of lava.”
  • He had such a big smirk on his face when you started running towards one of the tables full of wine and champagne.
  • Sure, it was a big commotion and shocked a lot of people seeing you knock over all the drinks as you stood on the table but Jumin was silently giddy.
  • He’s proud.

Saeyoung Choi ( 707 )

  • “The floor is Lava game? This isn’t a fucking a game.” - From the man that can’t get down from a flagpole
  • Seven doesn’t play around. He goes all out and over the top.
  • You are pretty sure some of the things he does is bending the laws a little… but all is fair when the ground is lava,
  • Playing with Seven is fun for the first couple of times but then it gets a little too intense.
  • He counts in a different language each time so you don’t truly know how long you have to find higher ground.
  • You bet your ass he uses the skills from the agency.
  • “This was the true purpose of all those wall climbs, ___!”
  • Seven’s sadist side shows during these times. You could be in the most inappropriate times and he would just lean down and whisper in your ear
  • “The floor is lava, _____~.”
  • Every time you guys play he is recording you. For the internet? Just the RFA? Blackmail? Who knows.
  • He won’t let you live out the time when you guys were stuck in an elevator with Jumin and he gave you only five seconds to think of a way to get off the ground.
  • You climbed onto Jumin.
  • Save Jumin pt. 2

Saeran Choi

  • What the fuck are you doing???
  • Why are you and Saeyoung climbing onto everything??
  • He doesn’t get it and he doesn’t want to play. He is too embarrassed.
  • One time Saeran went along with it when you announced the floor is lava and he thought it would be creative if he climbed the fence
  • His foot got caught on one of the holes and he fell right back down onto the sidewalk
  • He w i l l ne v er p l a y  ag a in
  • Saeran likes to watch vines and videos of people doing it though.
  • Then they could look like an idiot and he could laugh at them instead of the other way around.
  • You look too cute when you do it though and he will tell you the floor is lava util the game becomes dead to you 
  • No joke, he might be more brutal than everyone in the RFA
  • When you just wake up with a bowl is cereal? 
  • “Hey ___…” 
  • Right after sex? 
  • “..The floor is ..”
  • At a friend’s wedding? 
  • Right before checkout? 
  • At a funeral?
  • “SAERAN CHOI!”

Jihyun Kim ( V )

  • He tries he really really does
  • Because he loves you so and you are having so much fun doing it with your friends
  • But V is like that dad that is trying too hard to fit in with his teenager, y’know?
  • He can’t go over the top or else he would accidentally hurt himself but he is all laughing and having fun so you don’t really wanna tell him to stop.
  • When V accidentally hits someone while running he will apologize and forget all about the game
  • “Haha ____! I made it right?” He says, standing on top of a low bench
  • V gets worried if you go somewhere too high and he would suggest taking it down a few notches 
  • “I was just on a tree branch, V-”
  • You guys definitely do not play to the point where you would get kicked out of places or get in trouble.
  • It’s more sweet and innocent compared to how others play 
  • You guys are giggling and jumping around 
  • He is too sweet

Uncle Gerry’s Family Fun Zone

by reddit user Red_Grin

This is a lengthy story but it is worth it:

I didn’t know Will could draw, I remember thinking as my friend’s hand quickly moved across the page. And then I looked more closely at Will’s impromptu sketch, and I immediately regretted it. I tried to unsee it. I shifted my attention to other things around me, anything at all that wasn’t ink on the page: the blur of Will’s hand, the beads of sweat gathering at his temples, the gentle autumn breeze creeping through the crack of the window.

Don’t look at the page. Just don’t look at it.

But I knew I had to. So I looked. And it was worse than I expected. Much worse.

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Some WIPs from my little journal For updated versions go here: http://mon-cheri-fob.tumblr.com/post/136980619611/since-everyone-seemed-to-enjoy-the-original-wips

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Patrick Stump + Pre-hiatus music videos

Full Refund

Summary: It all starts with a silly text to Derek.

Notes: A quick little fic inspired by @stileshale‘s tags on this post. (On AO3)


Stiles drags himself up to his room, feet heavy on the stairs. He’d thought, now that summer was starting, he’d have a better chance. With all this free time, surely someone would let him take them on one date. But he’d been turned down time and time again.

So he’s back at his dad’s place, and it seems even less likely that he’ll find someone, now that he’s away from campus.

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Dryad au

Dryad’s are tree nympths, they are basically bound to the tree and I just- So much can be done with this hellllpppp. 

- Tree nympths having specific characteristics of the tree they guard/posess. For example they may have ivy growing out of them and the leaves of the tree in their hair.

-Tree nympths who gaurd the wildlife in the trees, for example squirrels in oak trees.

-Dryad’s who posess bonsai trees being tiny.

-Tree nympths who posess fir trees being hardy and able to resist very low temperatures.

-Nympths that posess deciduous trees (trees that lose their leaves during the winter and autumn) looking like normal people but looking very tired and less full of life.

-Parkour masters.

-Campaigning to protect trees in the city, or atleast move them from the city to somewhere new.

-Tree nympths who use photosynthesis? Sunbathing tree nympths sleeping just next to their tree.

- Tree nympths decorated with Amber.

-Tree nympths who are able to posess a new tree so long as it is the offspring of the previous which is still alive. 

-A monkey puzzle tree nympth visiting a jewellers shop who takes jet from a nearby mine, and finding jet from the leftovers of one of their old trees. (Jet is fossilised monkey puzzle).

-Agressive tree nympths who come from hawthorn or monkey puzzle.

-Nympths that live in your garden.

-That nympth witnessed your shameless house party.

-Modern nympths that decorate their tree on special occassions. Person A not liking the apple tree covered in decorative lights and demanding the dryad takes them down.

-Stop climbing mi tree.

-Naga that shares a tree and sleeps in the branches and helps protect the ree and in return can sunbathe on that one branch that sticks out.

-Bees honey being a part of the food source for the nympth.

-Throwing acorns at that centaur/person you don’t like.

-Nympth territory fights. “Scccuuusseee mmmeee III was going to plant mmyyy beech tree here!”

-Nympths with strong wills having pheonix trees (trees that will always regrow when you cut them down and poison them).

-A tree nympths mental state affecting their trees health.

-A tree getting an infection and a nympth bursting into the garden center like: I NEED YOUR FINEST PESTICIDE.

-I’m pretty sure it’s apple trees that do this but apple tree nympth finding out their tree will be the only one not being cut down and quickly collecting samples of other trees and adding them to the apple tree (as apple trees can merge and support other trees theresoneinNewyorkwhichisfabulous) so their nympth friends can stay alive.

- Nympths that merge like above getting all kinds of flower and leaves on them.

-Willow tree nympths having the flowing dangly branches for hair.

-Palm tree nympths having a personal umbrella-

On Love’s Light Wings

Simon runs into Baz before 8th year begins. An unspoken truce is made that leads to Simon realizing he might not hate Baz after all.

As always many thanks to @eroticgropefest for the beta, I don’t know what I would do without her!

[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] 


Baz

The first thing Snow did when we ran into each other by the lake was accuse me of following him. Which is moronic; my family owns this house and we’ve been coming here for years.

Usually I’d stay inside the house or by the lake reading and every summer I’d try to forget all about him. But now that he’s here I can’t stop thinking about anything else. It’s always him in my head, filling it with dreams and regret.

I figured that since he’s here I might as well make the most of it. I just want to be able to look at his stupid face during summer and I know that if I start to wander away he’ll follow me like he does at Watford. It will almost feel like we’re back in school and that nothing has changed.

The first few days he kept his distance, but he gave up soon after that. He started to follow me closer, asking stupid questions as we walked around; claiming that there’s nothing else to do here. So bloody predictable.

Simon

I don’t understand how we managed to spend the holidays in the same place. Baz keeps telling me that if anyone is plotting then it must be me because I’m the one that followed him here. I think he just likes to piss me off.

I tried to stay away from him, but I couldn’t. I was too curious to see what he does outside of Watford, so I stay hidden between the trees and watch him with his family in the morning.

After lunch Baz usually wanders around the lake or into the woods. In the first days that I started following him I tried to keep my distance so that he wouldn’t notice me. But he always did. So I gave up and started to follow him closer. I started to try and talk to him, first about random things; then about this place, and after that, about his family. Baz must be really bored too because after the first week his replies became more like he actually wanted to talk to me and he started to ask me some questions too.

Yesterday he told me to meet him sooner because he wanted to show me a place farther into the woods. So right after his family goes inside for lunch, I meet him and I notice that he’s carrying a backpack.

“What’s that for?” I ask him, pointing at it.

“Food,” he says –like it’s obvious and I’m a moron for asking,”what do you think I’d be carrying into the woods?” he adds, as he starts to walk.

Oh. Maybe I should have brought food too. And water. I didn’t really think that I should have come prepared to spend the whole afternoon in the woods.

When he notices that I’m not moving he stops and turns around. He must have realized what I was thinking because he adds, “don’t worry Snow. I packed enough for both of us.” And with that, he starts walking again.

I can’t help but grin. I like this side of Baz that isn’t a complete asshole.

It turns out what Baz wanted to show me was a small waterfall far into the woods, and it’s quite beautiful. The water falls into a some sort of natural pool that I’d love to step into.

Baz sits down under the shade of a tree and starts taking the food from his backpack, carefully putting everything on a beach towel that he also had in there. I realize that I’m starving when I look at the food. There’s sandwiches, fruit, and juices; everything looks amazing.

I sit down next to him and reach for a sandwich. Then something occurs to me and I stop. He wouldn’t go all the way out here just to poison me, would he?

When I notice him with his eyebrow raised at me, I decide to ignore all the doubts in my head. “Can I… Uhm … have one?” I ask.

“Of course” he replies, as he grabs one for himself.

I notice that he’s eating with his hand in front of his mouth but I’m not sure why. Does he always eat like this? It’s not like we eat at the same table in school for me to notice it but I decide not to comment anyway, he’s being nice for a change and I don’t want to ruin it.

When we finish the sandwiches it occurs to me that I’m having a picnic with Baz. I’ve never had a picnic outside of Watford before; especially not with Baz. I look at him and he’s a bit flushed–probably from the heat. He has his hair in a messy ponytail and some of the hair in front of his face has got loose. For some reason, looking at Baz makes me blush so I stop.

I decide to look at the water instead. It’s quite relaxing just sitting here enjoying the view. I feel like I could take a nap, but apparently Baz has other plans because he starts to take his shoes off.

“Come on Snow. You didn’t think I dragged you here just for the view, did you?” he tells me as he steps into the water and sits down on one of the big rocks so that he can put his feet in the water.

I decide to follow him, so I take my shoes and t-shirt off. As I step into the water, I pass him and keep walking until the water is by my waist. Then I let myself fall into the water. It feels so good; the cold water against my skin. I stay underwater for a few seconds before I feel the need to get up to breathe.

After I run my hands through my hair and face to get rid of the water I feel Baz looking at me, so I look up and tell him, “Are you going come here or do I need to make you?”

Then Baz get’s up, smirks at me, and takes his shirt off. He starts walking in my direction, not taking his eyes of me. I’ve never seen him shirtless before. I can’t seem to be able to look at anything else but him. Baz is… He’s gorgeous. And I knew it already, but somehow seeing him in here like this feels different. Like I’m really noticing him for the first time.

Then he passes me and starts swimming in the direction of where the water is falling. Once he reaches that zone, he climbs a few rocks and gets up right near the waterfall. Then he puts himself under the streams of falling water, closes his eyes and lets the water hit him. There’s a small smile on his face and he looks so relaxed. It’s one of the prettiest things I’ve ever seen.


Baz

Snow changed after I took him to the waterfall. He became more relaxed around me. So I started to take him to every interesting little thing around here before I need to leave. Today I wanted to show him the biggest tree  here, it’s so tall and thick it must be one of the oldest trees I’ve ever seen.

I was so distracted thinking about him that I didn’t realize  I couldn’t hear Snow’s loud steps behind me, so I stopped.

For a few seconds there was no sound. Then I hear a loud noise coming from not too far away, so I start to run into that direction. I stop when I see the entrance to the cave that I passed a few moments before. Of course he had to go in.

That’s when I hear him cursing. He sounds like he’s in in pain, so I start to run inside.

As I feel myself falling I realize how stupid I was. In my rush to get to Snow I wasn’t paying attention to my surroundings and fell in the same place that he did. Right on top of him.


(see my snowbaz fic masterlist)

The Joker x Reader -“ELLIS”

Nothing is ever easy with him, but this time he really crossed the line. If The Joker doesn’t care about anything at all, what is the point of you two being together? Unless…maybe he gives a damn about at least one thing.

You always drive back to Gotham on lonely, deserted roads, trying to avoid traffic as much as possible.

“J, we’re close to our cabin, we should stop and spend the night; just me and you, yes?” you smile, attempting to be cheerful and lightening up the mood.

“I don’t feel like it!” he bitterly replies, keeping his eyes on the road.

“We’re almost at the turn we have to take to get there. Come on… please?”

“NO! I told you I don’t feel like it!” he snarls, clenching his fingers on the steering wheel. You place your hand on his thigh, caressing it with your thumb:

“Baby, it’s not my fault the meeting didn’t go well.”

He pushes your hand away, still fuming. You look outside the window and take a deep breath, watching the sun going down behind the trees.

“J, come on, don’t be like this…You know I love you,” you tilt your head towards him, hoping he will change his mind.

“Right!!” he scoffs with a sour expression on his face.

“What is that supposed to mean?” you ask, getting restless.

“It means whatever you want it to mean!” the Joker snaps, quickly glancing your way.“You don’t love me, nobody does!” he hisses, being in such a foul mood he can barely concentrate on driving.

“Yeah…I wonder why…” you mutter but he heard you and it makes him even more enraged. You start massaging your temples; you really don’t need this after all the stuff that happened lately.

“J…why did we get married?” you ask, closing your eyes, thinking how much you wish your lives were different.

“Because we’re idiots, Y/N, that’s why!” he angrily raises his voice, accelerating. “Thank God you had the miscarriage three months ago because the kid would have probably had your attitude. I don’t think I could handle two of you!”

He hears you sniffle and your voice breaks down when you address him:

“Why…why do you say such cruel things?” and you start sobbing, deeply hurt by his words. “Stop the car…” you manage to speak through tears. “Stop the car!!!!” you suddenly hit the window with your first and he slams the breaks, unnerved.

You get out fast, taking your wedding ring off and tossing it in his lap:

“Here, consider yourself divorced!” you slam the door, frantically wiping your tears. He just grunts, annoyed and screams back at you:
“Fine! I don’t need you anyway!”

“I don’t need you either!” you yell, whimpering, feeling so miserable you can’t wait for him to go away.

“I hope you die in these woods!” The Joker growls, taking off in a frenzy, aggravated.

“I won’t give you the satisfaction!” you shout, crossing your arms on your tummy, watching him disappear in the distance. You turn around and start walking back towards the hidden unpaved, unmarked road that leads to your cabin. It should be about 10-15 minutes away by foot. You recently passed the spot by car so it shouldn’t be too far. Add about 2 more hours of walking until you reach the destination and you should be there before it gets really dark.

You walk rather slow, deep in thought; being outdoors does make you feel a little bit better. It takes you more than 2 hours, but you are finally at the hideout. You go inside and turn the lights on, looking through your supplies to see what you could munch on. You decide to make a tea and wrap yourself in a blanket, then head out to the porch so you can enjoy the silence you crave so badly.

You have your little backpack with you and search inside until you find the ultrasound picture you kept from when it was confirmed you were pregnant. Your eyes get teary again and you kiss the small image, talking to yourself:
“He only wishes you would have been like me…” you sadly smile and your grieving is interrupted by the sound of tires approaching.

Oh, no, what is he doing here? you panic, covering your head with the hoodie in a failed effort to calm down.

He gets out of the car and slams the door as hard as he can, staring you down.

“W-what are you doing here?” you inquire, shriveling down under your fluffy cover. J walks the stairs up to the porch, barking your way:

“I wanted to see if you died on your way here this way I can bury you. It would have given me great pleasure.”

“I’m not sorry to disappoint,” you sneer, still holding the little picture to your chest.

“What’s that?” The Joker points towards it, even if he already has an idea.

“Nothing you care about…”, you chew on your words, making an extra effort to keep your composure as you return your treasure to the backpack.

He takes a seat on the bench that’s the furthest from you, legs up on the railing, trying to light up a cigarette when you unexpectedly rush to yank it out of his hand and toss it to the ground, stepping on it:

“You quit two years ago!”

“Give it a rest before you make me mad!” J growls, taking out the full pack of cigarettes but you snatch it from him, breaking and tearing it to pieces, frustrated about everything and taking it on his nasty habit.

He takes a deep breath, trying not to lose his temper and warns you:

“Stop your shit, Y/N, you’re pissing me off!”

You don’t even care and continue:

“Go back to Gotham, I want to be alone! I don’t want you here, go away!” you shriek through your clenched teeth, heading back inside, trying not to cry.

“I don’t care about what you want; this is my hideout too!” you hear him grumble and don’t care for the rest since you step inside the bathroom, closing the door. You are so ready for a shower and a bit of sleep to calm down the tension you feel in every muscle of your body.

15 minutes into it and J parts the curtain to the side, making you jump since you didn’t hear him sneak in.

“Make room, I want to take a shower too,” he commands, getting inside.

“Go take a shower in the other bathroom!” you plead, irritated he’s so inconsiderate.

“I like this one better!” he kind of shoves you to the side, getting under the warm water.

“Fine, you can have it!” you give up, grabbing your towel and step outside when he tries to snatch you.

“Where are you going? I wanna wash your hair!” he angrily yells after you, unhappy you’re defiant…again.

“I already washed it myself!” you slam the door and J continues his tirade, tossing shampoo and body wash bottles around the bathtub in his tantrum.  

I just need some peace and quiet, why can’t I have that? you think while resting your back against the door for a few seconds, sensing your anxiety is going to reach new levels soon.

The Joker took his time in there but now he’s finally done. He searches for you inside the cabin but you are not there. He peeks out of the window and notices you are dozing off on the couch to the left side of the porch, covered in blankets. Perfect time to rant some more, you are definitely going to hear about how much you annoyed him today!

But when he sees you are in a deep sleep, something stops him. The corner of the ultrasound picture sticks out a bit from under your pillow and he slowly pulls it out, glaring at it for a few good minutes before putting it back with a remorseful sigh. He takes a deep breath and grabs more blankets from the pile on the table and covers you with them, keeping just one for himself. J also brings the gun from the car and seats on the chair next to yours, awake all night because he believes a wild animal might creep up on you.

When the first rays of sunshine pierce through the thick fog, he finally loses the battle and closes his eyes, exhausted. He wakes up three hours later, wrapped in a dozen blankets, not feeling the cold he braved last night anymore; it gets so chilly in these woods after sunset.

He finds breakfast and hot coffee inside but you are gone again. Probably hiking at your favorite spot, J assumes, munching on a few goodies from his plate. You’ve been away for a while and he decides to search for you, he doesn’t even know why. You aren’t too far, just about a mile away behind the cabin, legs crossed in the grass, reading a magazine under your umbrella and enjoying the warm temperature. You hear him approach and you don’t lift your eyes up. He doesn’t say a word and just imitates your position a few steps away from you.

“What are you doing?” you coldly question him, not thrilled of his presence.

“Nothing,” The Joker barely bothers to answer.

You exhale, turning the page and fighting not to pay attention to his nonsense:

“You can’t stay in the sun, you know you burn easily,” you grunt, indirectly inviting him to get lost.

“So? Why do you care? Mind your own business!” and he lets himself go on his back, enjoying the hot sun.

“You’ll burn badly, go in the shadow,” J distinguishes your low voice urging him to move.

He ignores your warning and after a few more moments he opens his eyes to see your umbrella by his head, shielding half of his body from the sun and you walking away.

She’s so obnoxious, I really hate her, is the last thought he has before closing his eyes again and falling asleep shortly after since he’s so tired.

************

You are nowhere to be found. The Joker searched the cabin and around it but you vanished.

Good, maybe she fell from a cliff and my problems are done, he maliciously grins, relieved and hoping for his wish to come true, but after a few seconds the evil smile freezes on his lips as he notices your backpack is gone. And the small post-it on the fridge he didn’t see before makes him cringe:

“I’m going back to Gotham.”  

Crazy woman, walking alone in the woods, J growls, taking the car keys out of his pocket and heading outside.

*************

You discern the sound of the engine getting closer and closer and quicken your pace, not understanding why you can’t have a moment to yourself when you are very entitled to it. He passes you by and turns the car sideways, slamming on the breaks, gets out of the car and awaits your arrival, his blue eyes so dark it would make you hesitate on your decision.

Yet you avoid looking at him and attempt to go around when he rolls his eyes, fed up with your behavior and stomps towards you, lifting you up and slamming you on the hood, making you seat there against your will while you struggle to get down. J is blocking your way, not budging when you struggle to escape.

“Where are you going, hm? Are you really trying to get on my nerves?” he pins your hands behind your back, watching tears of frustrations forming in your eyes but you are too strong to let him win and swallow your vexation, finally looking at him.

“I’m walking back to Gotham,” you mutter, defying his blue gaze.

“It’s a long walk, Doll,” he pushes you up on the hood even more, making sure you can’t move.

“Why do you care? You don’t care about anything, not even…about…”  and you can’t control yourself anymore and start sobbing, thinking about the mean things he said to you yesterday that hurt you so much. J knows exactly what you are referring to and sucks on his cheeks, gulping, finally speaking up on the subject:

“I did care about that…”

You shake your head in denial, whimpering, dismissing his words so he repeats:

“I did care about that.”

“N-no you d-didn’t,” you cry harder and The Joker sets your hands free, backing out just a bit so you can slide down towards him.

“I did, I cared about that,” he insists, rolling up the sleeve on his left arm to point out the huge “ELLIS” tattoo on his forearm. “Why do you think I got the name on my skin and didn’t remove it? I will always keep it, do you hear me? I did care…” his voice breaks a bit and wipes your tears, lifting your chin up, forcing you to look at him again.

Ellis is the name you two picked for the baby when you found out you were pregnant, fit for a boy or a girl. You were so excited and over the moon you didn’t have patience to wait any longer. But it wasn’t meant to be…

Since you can’t stop crying and he grows impatient, J yanks you in his arms, hugging you while you want to push him away.

“I did care…” he continues to whisper in your ear over and over again until he feels your body relaxing and your arms go around his waist, hugging him back really tight. Since you still won’t stop crying, he caresses your hair, tightening his grip on you too. He senses tears menacing to roll down his cheeks but he brushes the awkward feeling away, because it’s not like him to show any weakness. Instead, he chooses to be The Joker and he has to admit to himself it really takes a lot of effort this time around:

“…Say, Princess, are we still divorced?”

“U-hum,” you manage to squeal, sobbing on his chest.

“That’s too bad, I was hoping to get some tonight,” and he kind of sadly smiles when you pinch his side.” Since I’m here and you’re here, can we at least have an affair?”

“Stop your stupid jokes,” you scold him, sniffling. He kisses your temple and helps you down, regaining his posture, but still holds your hand.

He seems surprised when you push yourself against his body and make him pay attention to what you have to say:

“You can lash out at me, but…” and your voice shakes ”…you can’t say anything mean about our poor baby, do you hear me?” There is so much pain and grief in your voice that he has no choice but to nod yes.

“Don’t ever say anything mean about Ellis… promise?” and you cup his face, waiting for the answer.

“I promise,” he agrees so fast he shocks himself.

“Good then, now you are allowed to drive me back to Gotham,” you announce and take your backpack off, going around the car to get in on the passenger’s side. “Did you lock the cabin?”

“I did,” J reports and can’t help bickering as he starts to drive away:

Allowed to drive you back, Pumpkin?! Like it’s what, a privilege??!!”

“Damn right it is!” you raise your voice and look out the window, ignoring the outburst.

“Pffttt, lucky me…” he grumbles but takes your hand and kisses it. You don’t object and scoot over towards him, silently leaning your head on his shoulder.

“Hey, Kitten, are we still divorced? Or do you want your ring back? I have it in my jacket.”

“I guess you’re allowed to give it back to me when we get home,” you decide with an indifferent tone.

Allowed to give it back??! Like it’s what, a privilege??!” he mocks, taking the turn towards the main road.

“Damn right it is!” you elbow him and he frowns, aggravated:

“Pffttt, lucky me…”

“You are lucky!” you cut him off, lifting your eyebrows with an attitude.

“Maybe just a little bit…” he admits and it makes you smirk, clenching to his arm even more.

 Also read: MASTERLIST

http://diyunho.tumblr.com/post/153664676321/joker-x-reader-masterlist

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Eremika Week 2017 Day 7: Ocean

Eren and Mikasa took a holiday (vacation) to the seaside (beach).  They enjoyed a tasty picnic, paddled in the sea water and enjoyed the summer sunshine. Happy Days!

Random dialogue prompts #2

“That’s a lot of orange.”
“I’m not taking down the Christmas tree!”
“Well, tell her I said ‘suck it’.”
“But why are there so many ducks?!“
“What, are you part of the blue man group or something?”
“I don’t like your hair, it’s in the way.”
“She had to be different, didn’t she?!”
“You and your stupid name!”
“To infinity and the yard!”
“Open this door!”
“It’s a nice dress but you’re a loon.”
“Believe me, I have no idea why this is happening.”
“Are you hitting on me?”
“Would you like a cookie?”

Can’t Be Tamed: Part ONE

Katsuki Bakugou X Reader
AU: Omega verse
Theme: Combining Medieval AU and Royal AU

Trigger Warning (Just in case, if anyone gets trigger)

!Read With Caution!


The birds chirping happily in the high trees. The high trees shadowing over a small cottage which they purchased together when their relationship got deeper and serious.

Both of them wanted to be isolated from everyone else, where no one would bother them, nor journalists finding out about their relationship.

Despite they are supposed to enemies since their families strongly dislike each other for years.

However, they didn’t let that stop them from becoming friends to lovers over the years.

Keep reading

I know there’s a guide somewhere on how to do this, but I can’t find it now

Everyone loves rare stumps because they’re creative and cool and they provide mushrooms all year round. But they’re so rare ! There’s no way to know if you’re getting a rare stump.

UNTIL NOW

FOOL-PROOF WAY TO GET RARE STUMPS!

*Things you need*
-a gold or normal axe (both work, I’ve only used gold)
-a silver axe (available at the island for a couple medals)
-a tree (duh)

*How to do it*

It takes 3 hits with any axe to cut a tree down. In this technique, you hit the tree twice with whatever axe you have (just not the silver one). Then you hit it once with the silver. Bam! Rare stump!

Enjoy the stumps!