Hi darling. :) xx
I understand where you’re coming from. It can take some time to feel comfortable in your own skin. It takes time to build up confidence. But its not impossible to do so. I also understand where you’re coming from because I struggle with poor body image and I can tell you first hand, the longer you hate on your body, the less time you have to love it. I can PROMISE you that you’re beautiful/handsome, Now honey, I don’t make promises I can’t keep ;)
I think the best advice I can give you is the advice that helped me when I was struggling.
When you’re having a bad body image day, don’t stress. Tomorrow is a new day and a clean slate. Often times, bad days don’t last forever, something good comes out of everyday and if you’re having a hard time thinking of something good that happened though out your day, then maybe take some time to think about the things you did today and the things you saw.
When you’re feeling self conscious about your body, try and remember these steps:
- Smile (even when it hurts.)
- Take a step back and think
- Listen (to the sounds, voices of the people/things around you
- Breathe. Take some deep breathes.
- Move forward with your life.
I’m going to be honest with you, when you’re being negative about your body image, that’s not helping you in any possible way. Its actually harming you because the more you self loath, the more you’re going to feel comfortable doing so- and that’s just not fun and it shouldn’t be something that people feel comfortable doing.
20 Ways to Love Your Body
- Think of your body as the vehicle to your dreams. Honor it. Respect it. Fuel it.
- Create a list of all the things your body lets you do. Read it and add to it often.
- Become aware of what your body can do each day. Remember it is the instrument of your life, not just an ornament.
- Create a list of people you admire: people who have contributed to
your life, your community, or the world. Consider whether their
appearance was important to their success and accomplishments.
- Walk with your head held high, supported by pride and confidence in yourself as a person.
- Don’t let your weight or shape keep you from activities that you enjoy.
- Wear comfortable clothes that you like, that express your personal style, and that feel good to your body.
- Count your blessings, not your blemishes.
- Think about all the things you could accomplish with the time and
energy you currently spend worrying about your body and appearance. Try
- Be your body’s friend and supporter, not its enemy.
- Consider this: your skin replaces itself once a month, your stomach
lining every five days, your liver every six weeks, and your skeleton
every three months. Your body is extraordinary—begin to respect and
- Every morning when you wake up, thank your body for resting and rejuvenating itself so you can enjoy the day.
- Every evening when you go to bed, tell your body how much you appreciate what it has allowed you to do throughout the day.
- Find a method of exercise that you enjoy and do it regularly. Don’t
exercise to lose weight or to fight your body. Do it to make your body
healthy and strong and because it makes you feel good. Exercise for the
Three F’s: Fun, Fitness, and Friendship.
- Think back to a time in your life when you felt good about your
body. Loving your body means you get to feel like that again, even in
this body, at this age.
- Keep a list of 10 positive things about yourself—without mentioning your appearance. Add to it daily!
- Put a sign on each of your mirrors saying, “I’m beautiful inside and out.”
- Search for the beauty in the world and in yourself.
- Consider that, “Life is too short to waste my time hating my body this way.”
- Eat when you are hungry. Rest when you are tired. Surround
yourself with people that remind you of your inner strength and beauty.
10 Steps to Positive Body Image
One list cannot automatically tell you how to turn negative body thoughts
into positive body image, but it can introduce you to healthier ways of
looking at yourself and your body. The more you practice these new
thought patterns, the better you will feel about who you are and the
body you naturally have.
- Appreciate all that your body can do. Every day your body
carries you closer to your dreams. Celebrate all of the amazing things
your body does for you—running, dancing, breathing, laughing, dreaming,
- Keep a top-ten list of things you like about yourself—things that
aren’t related to how much you weigh or what you look like. Read your
list often. Add to it as you become aware of more things to like about
- Remind yourself that “true beauty” is not simply skin deep. When
you feel good about yourself and who you are, you carry yourself with a
sense of confidence, self-acceptance, and openness that makes you
beautiful regardless of whether you physically look like a supermodel.
Beauty is a state of mind, not a state of your body.
- Look at yourself as a whole person. When you see yourself in a
mirror or in your mind, choose not to focus on specific body parts. See
yourself as you want others to see you–as a whole person.
- Surround yourself with positive people. It is easier to feel good
about yourself and your body when you are around others who are
supportive and who recognize the importance of liking yourself just as
you naturally are.
- Shut down those voices in your head that tell you your body is not
“right” or that you are a “bad” person. You can overpower those
negative thoughts with positive ones. The next time you start to tear
yourself down, build yourself back up with a few quick affirmations that
work for you.
- Wear clothes that are comfortable and that make you feel good about your body. Work with your body, not against it.
- Become a critical viewer of social and media messages. Pay
attention to images, slogans, or attitudes that make you feel bad about
yourself or your body. Protest these messages: write a letter to the
advertiser or talk back to the image or message
- Do something nice for yourself—something that lets your body know
you appreciate it. Take a bubble bath, make time for a nap, find a
peaceful place outside to relax.
- Use the time and energy that you might have spent worrying about
food, calories, and your weight to do something to help others.
Sometimes reaching out to other people can help you feel better about
yourself and can make a positive change in our world.
Steps to improve self esteem:
- Focus on your strengths – figure out what you are good at! There are plenty of things that you are wonderful at and
use those to build your confidence! No one is good at everything so do
not fret if you are bad at something! Instead focus on what you are good
at and enjoy them!
- Learn from your mistakes - you don’t have to be
good at everything like mentioned above but use your mistakes to your
advantage! Don’t worry about them- live and learn!
- Do what you love – make time everyday to do something you enjoy! Do something that makes you happy to improve your mood!
- Tell yourself you are beautiful - stand in front of
a mirror and tell yourself how beautiful you are ! Keep telling
yourself and fake it until you make it! Really mean what you are saying a
realize all of the beautiful things about you - including any flaws (
they make you unique!)
- Turn your negative thoughts into positive ones –
instead of thinking your legs are big or whatever your problem is, be
thankful you have working legs that you can run marathons with if you
wanted! Try to stay optimistic and see the positive side of everything!
It will greatly improve your mood and outlook on life!
- Realize that beauty has no measure on your life. Okay
even if someone is not beautiful that has no relevance to one’s life !
Everyone has worth and is amazing! I am sure you are the prettiest
person ever but even if you are not then who really cares? What does it
really matter? All that matters is that you are happy and love your
life- and that should not be dependent upon whether or not you are
- Weight has no relevance to beauty! Whether you are 100 or 300 pounds you can be beautiful! Please do not relate the two to one another! See this post (:
- Spend time with people you love and who love you! It
is important to spend time with loved ones! They will boost your mood
and confidence! If people have a negative impact on your life then you
don’t have to spend time with them! Don’t feel like you must stick
around for everyone! You have to put yourself first and make sure you
are happy! Don’t let others drag you down!
- Remember that life is simple - the sun rises and
the sun sets, we just tend to complicate the process. Remember the
simplicity in life and let it help you to stay calm and stay focused on
the important things! Love yourself and love your life! Enjoy it while
you can and don’t let everything stress you out so much!
- Be generous! Help others, be kind to others, and give when you can. It will spread love and make you feel better as a person.
Now, lets work on changing your thought process. Changing the way you
think about things for example, when you have negative thoughts. Try
these thoughts instead:
I am ugly - I am beautiful I am worthless - I have worth I am sick - I will heal I hate myself - I will learn to love myself I am weak - I am strong, or I wouldn’t be here today I am moody - I have profound emotional depth I am lost - I will find myself I am scared - I have courage I am crazy - It is normal to struggle I am in pain - It’s okay to hurt I am tired - I will not give up I’m not good enough - I am better than “good enough” I can’t change - I can change
Once you’ve tried changing your thought process, the next set of
advice I have for you is some awesome links that I think you could
benefit from looking into”
Hope this helps! :)
Please let me know if you’re ever in the
need of some more help, advice, support etc. I’m always here and only an
ask away. Take care & don’t forget to smile because you’re amazing.