So many dumb ways to die

I’ve seen so many humans are weird posts where humans are seen as the invincible warrior species, but one thing that I’ve yet to see mentioned is how ridiculously easy it is for humans to die in some cases. For that reason, I will list a few here.

Humans can die by …

  • eating a larger meal after a long fast (refeeding syndrome)
  • their own immune system overreacting to a peanut (allergies)
  • accidentally inhaling a small amount of water that causes vocal chords to spasm and close up… hours after exiting the pool (dry drowning)
  • Speaking of drowning, people can also drown in inches deep water if the water is cold and they fall face first
  • consuming too much of certain nutrients (hypervitaminosis)
  • food accidentally going down the wrong pipe (choking)
  • (what is mentioned above can also happen with a human’s own vomit)
  • blood getting into the wrong parts of the body, especially the brain (aneurysm)

Feel free to add to this list

Humans Are Weird: Gallium

What if there was an entire alien civilization based in cold climates that used gallium the same way us humans use iron or steel. now imagine these aliens looks of horror as our meer human body-heat melts what they consider their strongest building material. If I was that alien I would be scared shitless.

Humans are Weird: Allergies

*This is my first attempt at writing a ‘humans are weird’ post and I don’t know if this idea has already been done before and I apologize if my wording below is weird, like if I’m too dramatic or something*

Allergies: Mild to moderate annoyances, or in some cases life-threatening complications, that many humans have to deal with throughout their lives. But to an outsider, one of the strangest irritants to the bodies of some humans are our own environments, a.k.a seasonal allergies; some of us are literally allergic to the natural world! Mold spores, pollen, and grass, weeds, and trees can cause a number of people’s eyes and throat to swell and become teary and itchy, their sinuses to stuff up, and to burst into coughing fits and overall just worsen a person’s day. And we have no cure for them! Sure we have medications that can provide alleviation from the symptoms for a while but we can’t completely eliminate our hypersensitivities to the substances; allergies are just something we have to put up with our entire lives.

Or even stranger, water and sun allergies (aquagenic urticaria and photosensitivity); they’re exceptionally rare biological anomalies but they most definitely exist and are constant hardships for their sufferers. In the worst cases of aquagenic urticaria, victim’s skin would be in constant pain, their bodies covered with a burning red rash because of the water the human body is 50-70% made of. And sunlight allergies, they can force a person to stay indoors with the blinds shut to avoid their skin flaking and breaking out in excruciating blisters and scars.

What if some alien species don’t go through any of this? Maybe their medicine and technology is so far advanced that long ago, centuries ago even, they completely removed allergy-causing genes from their DNA if they clone and create members of their kind, so generations of aliens have no idea what allergies are. Or they developed cures? Perhaps they’re so well adapted to their environment that they don’t have water, sun, pollen, spore, and plant allergies. What would they think of our feeble race, our bodies that are susceptible to the natural world, our home? 

Feel free to use these ideas for writing and check out @airgaming‘s blog as they suggested the idea to me.

space oddity (wail)
David Bowie (Santa Monica '72)
space oddity (wail)

in case anybody was wondering, here is the infamous “live space oddity wail”

this is off of his Santa Monica ‘72 album, where he sings space oddity

in other words, bowie are you okay

“eeeeeuuuuuuuuuUUUUUUUUh badaboodabada”

(also thank you to @bowies-thighs for making the initial post about this and introducing me to it)

Things I think should be discussed for humans are weird.

~hiccups and our various and strange ways of getting rid of them

~journaling. i mean, we write stuff down that we can just as easily remember.

~cursive vs print. we have two seperate ways of writing the alphabet (not including calligraphy). that has to be strange.

~our ways of “predicting” the future. tarot cards, astrology, crytal balls, etc.

~all the different mythologies we have and how odd they can be at times

~sentimentality. sure you could throw away that paper flower but it was a gift so you won’t even though you really don’t need it. and by extension, antiques.

~emoticons ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

~how we’ll figure out a way to eat pretty much anything

~Double jointedness. Just imagine someone bending their fingers backwards to stretch them out and all the aliens think they just broke their fingers. Then them insisting it doesn’t hurt at all.

~On that note, contortionists. Enough said.

~the many, many definitions of beauty.

~social norms. Think facing the back wall of an elevator or standing just a little too close or far away when speaking. All these rules we follow without even realizing they’re there.

That’s all I got right now folks. Maybe I’ll try to come up with more.