Shougo Haizaki

  • Haizaki: You know, my dick has a lot in common with the sun.
  • Aomine: Why? Because nobody likes looking at it directly?
  • Kise: It gives people cancer?
  • Kuroko: It’s going to die someday?
  • Momoi: It rises at the crack of dawn?
  • Murasakibara: It disappears at night?
  • Akashi: Direct exposure to it often leads to a nasty case of sunburn?
  • Midorima: It needs to stay approximately 92,960,000 miles away from me?
  • Nijimura: Nobody will ever touch it?
Classification of KNB characters

The “bastard and fucking sexy….BOOM PREGNANT !” ones (and “dark” too…so emo)

The “angry” ones (my eaaars ;_; )

The “excited and lol lol lol” ones

The “showing an emotion can kill me” ones

The “smile who can cure cancer” ones

BONUS : The “my eyesbrows are fabulous” ones

  • Akashi: You're a piece of shit!
  • Haizaki: No, you're a piece of shit!
  • Kuroko: I know the two of you are very different from each other in a lot of ways, but you have to understand that as far as I'm concerned, you're BOTH pieces of shit! Yeah, I can prove it mathematically. Actually, let me grab my whiteboard. This has been a long time coming, anyway.

lumiiinas  asked:

BOi i am back omg i love every scenario u make like no joke,, ur great,, we love you,, hope ur healthy,, buT yeah can i rq a scenario with Aomine, Haizaki, Hanamiya, Kagami and Nebuya where their s/o wakes up a bit later than them and when they come downstairs they're in nothing but their partner's shirt and they're all sleepy and snuggly and clingy to them and they boys find it cute how they're so inimate and pure 🌝

OH god i forgot one person in my ask if yA dont mind can you add Kiyoshi? ThAnk

Of course I can sweetie! And thanks for requesting from me once more! I really enjoy seeing what you guys come up with, so it’s never a dull moment with some of these requests!

Aomine: Usually Aomine was the late sleeper between the two of you.. But upon seeing you still sleeping, hair splayed across the sheets, he didn’t try to disturb you, heading downstairs to make food. 

Again, he was at a loss, since you did all the cooking and preparations for the morning.. But he tried to make sense of things, searching through cookbooks to find a decent enough recipe.

At least until your arms wrapped around him. 

He paused, eyes wide as he turned to look at you, clad in his shirt and hair still in disarray.. There was a soft frown, as if you were upset he’d left you alone, and oh god.. He’s never seen you this.. adorable in his life..

“Dai-chan…” you mumbled, snuggling in the fabric covering his chest, “Come back to bed.. I’m cold…”

He didn’t hesitate, dropping everything and carrying you back to bed, where he was sure to make you so warm, you were forced to strip from his clothing.

Haizaki: He really didn’t want to leave the bed, but his stomach and the cries from his mom urged him to get up, though he was cranky and irritated. He left you under the blanket, unaware you’d woken up after he left, and he went to check around, eyebrows furrowed deeply…

Tch.. he was having a pleasant dream until he was interrupted..

He didn’t hear soft steps, but he almost jumped when you came to hug him, a tiny whine leaving your throat.

“Shogo-kun!! C..Come back to bed..” you paused, noticing the irritation on his face, “….Please…?”

God… he was completely finished.. As much as he hated being asked to do anything, seeing you like this, begging for him to come back to bed.. He really couldn’t deny you… His needs overstepped his wants, and he didn’t bother to say anything, just nodding slowly and let you guide him.

He was determined to erase that innocence from your face.

Hanamiya: Mornings were never his forte… In fact, Hanamiya hated them as much as he hated teams who worked together.. 

But this morning.. It was somehow… different.

He didn’t realize how innocent you were until you’d came to him, in only his shirt, and hugged him from behind with sleep in your eyes. He’d really thought he erased all your innocence away..

This expression, however, was much more… child-like..

As annoyed as he was with mornings, this one didn’t seem as bad when you looked at him, like that . However, those thoughts only lasted for a few minutes, before he clicked his tongue, carrying you back to bed roughly.

You may be cute, but he could be cuter.

Kagami: He’d never get used to seeing you right when he wakes up. That’s why Kagami had to immediately vacate his room, before he’d chose to listen to his inner voice, telling him to stay with you and re-enact last night’s events.

His cheeks burned just thinking about it, so he shook his head, focusing on the breakfast he was intending on making for the two of you. However, he wasn’t prepared for you to come in, adorning HIS shirt, one eye open as you yawned and hugged him carefully.

“W…Why didn’t you wake me… Tai-chan…?”

He swallowed, looking down at you, which was a mistake, as he’d seen part of your breast, and the marks he’d left on you before. He made a noise, turning around immediately and tried to think of what to say.. Y..yes.. why didn’t he wake you..?

Oh right.. He would’ve fainted and had a nose bleed..

“I.. I thought you could use s…some more… s…sleep!!”

He froze when you hummed, rubbing your nose against his back as you sighed, squeezing him tighter.

“You’re such a good boy, Taiga.. T..Thank you..”

There was a sudden crash, followed by a giant mess in the kitchen.. How you managed to make him destroy his house, Kagami will never know..

Kiyoshi: “___-____-chan…? W…Why aren’t you..?”

Kiyoshi really thought you would’ve still been sleeping, but he was utterly surprised when you followed after him, clinging to him like a child. His shirt didn’t help the matter, being way too big on you, and he found it in him to chuckle, though it sounded a little forced..

“Ah.. I see.. ____-chan wanted to be with me, hm?”

At your flustered cheeks, he knew he hit the mark, and he was quick to turn around, picking you up and holding you against his chest. He lightly kissed your forehead, smiling when you buried your face in his neck, and he massaged your legs.

“Alright then, just give me a few minutes to finish our breakfast and then we can go back to cuddling.. Okay?”

He could never erase that adorable look from your face, especially when you still wore his shirt.

Nebuya: He could tell from the previous night just how exhausted you were. For starters, you didn’t rebel to his suggestion of staying over. You let him put HIS clothing on you, and quite frankly, you’d crashed while studying for an upcoming test. Even when he woke up before you, Nebuya was shocked at how peaceful you were. 

So he’d decided to make breakfast for the two of you. Luckily it was a sunday, meaning there was no practice or classes.. Just a day in.. He heard pattering down the hallway, and as he turned to call your name, his voice stopped, and suddenly, he wasn’t so loud anymore..

You were ridiculously… adorable..

He was blushing when his shirt hung over your body, showing some of your bare legs, and you’d rubbed your eyes softly, yawning before walking towards him, wrapping your arms around his waist.

But what sealed the deal was how you’d lightly whined, cheeks a bit red as you mumbled,

“Ei-chan… Come back to bed…”

He tried not to make a sound, instead wrapped you in his arms and didn’t let go.

anonymous asked:

gom + kagami + haizaki's s/o pranking them by screaming OOOOH HE'S STEALING in the middle of the store when they pick something up

Aomine Daiki: At the sound of you yelling, Aomine fumbles with and drops whatever he’s picked up, cursing under his breath. There’s a mother shopping with her child in your aisle as well, and whilst the mother is trying not to look your way, her child stares straight at Aomine.

“Look mummy, it’s a thief!” 

You can’t help but burst into laughter at the way Aomine scowls at the child, and then at you. 

Kise Ryouta: “E-Ehh?!” Kise quickly glances around, looking up and down the aisle you guys are in to see if anyone had heard what you had yelled out. He breathes out a sigh of relief when he sees that no one is around. 

“_____-cchi, that was mean!” He complains, lips curling into a slight pout. 

Midorima Shintarou: Midorima’s eye twitches in irritation, but he tries to pay no heed to your accusations. However, he eventually gives into temptation and does a quick sweep of the store with his eyes when you yell out again, this time louder. 

“What are you doing, nanodayo?” He mutters, unamused. “Why would I try to steal toilet paper?” 

Murasakibara Atsushi: You don’t even get the chance to pull your prank on Murasakibara - you’re shopping for snacks with him and he’s decided that he couldn’t be bothered to wait until the checkout before tearing into his food. 

“Atsushi!” You watch in horror as he rips open a packet of chips and sticks his hand in right in the middle of the aisle. “You can’t do that! They’ll think we’re actually stealing!” 

Kuroko Tetsuya: Kuroko blinks, surprised, when you pull your prank on him. 
“But I’m not stealing this, _____-san,” He says with a sly smile, quickly pushing the groceries into your arms. “You are.”

By the time a member of staff reaches your aisle, Kuroko has already disappeared and you have to awkwardly explain your prank to the very unamused security guard. You make a mental note to never try to prank your boyfriend again. 

Akashi Seijurou: A staff member working in the store begins to make his way over to you and Akashi when you jokingly yell out the accusation, but he stops right in his tracks when he notices Akashi’s stare on him. 

You’re wondering why the guy suddenly makes a three-sixity and begins walking back to the counter, when Akashi turns the same blank stare on you. 

“We’ll talk about this when we get home, _____.” 

Gulping inwardly at both his words and unimpressed stare, you flash him your most playful smile, mind racing to find an appropriate apology before the two of you make it home. 

Kagami Taiga: Kagami panics big time, freezing up like a deer in the headlights when you pull your prank, and you almost feel sorry for doing it. He quickly puts the pair of sneakers he was looking at back on the shelf before the store manager comes, and tries to nonchalantly whistle some tune when he does come to check up on your aisle. 

It’s totally obvious that he’s acting nervous and the store manager ends up keeping his eye on the both of you for the remainder of your shopping trip. 

Haizaki Shougo: Haizaki ignores you when you pull your prank, and continues to browse the chocolate bar section of the aisle in his usual manner. When someone comes to follow up on your fake accusation of Haizaki stealing something, he sighs in exasperation. 

“Sorry,” He’s unusually polite, and you’re surprised he’s even bothering to give an explanation. “My partner here, _____, thought it’d be funny to pull a prank…I haven’t stolen anything.”

The manager believes him, but the moment he leaves the aisle Haizaki grabs a kitkat bar off the shelf and quickly slips it into his pocket.

“Thanks babe.” He winks at you and your gobsmacked expression. “You made this ten times easier.”