SOMETIMES-THIS-KID

allskynostars  asked:

When you get this, it would be cool if you could post 10 facts about yourself and then pass it along to 10 followers!! :)

This is also for @daisy-chain-gardens and @fictionsofriverdale cause they also asked me :)

10 things about me:


1. I have serious road rage. It’s a problem if I’m gonna be honest and makes me say colorful things in front of my kids sometimes 😬

2. My dad is a pastor and I play piano in church….yes, really lol

3. I play the guitar as well

4. I graduated high school with honors and extra credits cause I’m a super nerd.

5. I have a wonderful relationship with my dad.

6. My mother is mean and we dont get along well.

7. My kids are named after Characters in my two favorite books.

8. I say ‘seriously’ so much that my niece has me in her phone contacts as '💞seriously?? 💞

9. Im addicted to salt water taffy

10. I have never read Harry Potter, the twilight books or 50 Shades of Grey and I never will.

AWRIGHT.

First day to myself in MONTHS.

Son is not happy about having to go back to school, but he did ok. A little grumbling.

He was sad that he has to meet so many new people, even his bus driver because the old one retired. Luckily, we already know the lady that took over. she drove the little kids’ bus last year and sometimes the big kids’ bus breaks down and they had to ride her bus.

So that’s a bonus, and a fortuitous start to a potentially bad day.


…. No idea what I’ll do with myself. Got to build the de-stink box. I hope the kitty litter we have in the garage is still viable (not moldy). If not, I still have coffee and activated charcoal.

Kira’s hair is still damp, so they’re not all read, yet.

I much prefer removing the stench to covering it up, but if I wanted to cover it up, I’d just stick the dolls in a bin with one of those Christmas tree air fresheners. They’re killer.

When you get older, you notice your sheets are dirty. Sometimes, you do something about it. And sometimes, you read the front page of the newspaper and sometimes you floss and sometimes you stop biting your nails and sometimes you meet a friend for lunch. You still crave lemonade, but the taste doesn’t satisfy you as much as it used to. You still crave summer, but sometimes you mean summer, 5 years ago. You remember your umbrella, you check up on people to see if they got home, you leave places early to go home and make toast. You stand by the toaster in your underwear and a big t-shirt, wondering if you should just turn in or watch one more hour of television. You laugh at different things. You stop laughing at other things. You think about old loves almost like they are in a museum. The socks, you notice, aren’t organized into pairs and you mentally make a note of it. You cover your mouth when you sneeze, reaching for the box of tissues you bought, contains aloe.

When you get older, you try toner, you experiment with trousers, you experiment with real sexy outfits, you experiment with pin curls and darker hair and orange-toned red lipstick and you date people that look good on paper. You kiss them in public and feel only a little self-conscious. You never like them, although sometimes you really do. you think about safe sex and sometimes, kids. You think about plants, maybe succulents, or maybe even a cat?

When you get older, you try different shampoos. You find one you like. You try sleeping early and spin class and jogging again. You try a book you almost read but couldn’t finish. You wrap yourself in the blankets of: familiar t-shirts, caffe au lait, dim tv light, texts with old friends or new people you really want to like and love you. You lose contact with friends from college, and only sometimes you think about it. When you do, it feels bad and almost bitter. You lose people, and when other people bring them up, you almost pretend like you know what they are doing. You try to stop touching your face and become invested in things like expensive salads and trying parsnips and saving up for a vacation you really want. You keep a spare pen in a drawer. You look at old pictures of yourself and they feel foreign and misleading. You forget things like: purchasing stamps, buying more butter, putting lotion on your elbows, calling your mother back. You learn things like balance: checkbooks, social life, work life, time to work out and time to enjoy yourself.

When you get older, you find things like rejection hurt less and things like nostalgia hurt more. You watch people do things you want to do, and then you do some of those things too. Things start to feel like pins on a map. You watch landmarks pass and almost note them. You eat a taco from a food truck and be careful to dab the corners of your mouth with a napkin. You smooth your shirt down. You think about details, the details of how clean the beer cup is, how you need to put the dishes away, how she smells like a perfume you wore and how his teeth are perfect and aligned. You feel a little less downtrodden by things like routine and security and a little more appreciative of things like doing nothing, finding a friend, stretching on a big couch. You hear old songs and only sometimes do they gut you. You think about your future almost always, in both a thrilling way and a very very panicked way.

When you get older, you find yourself more in control. You find your convictions appealing, you find you like your body more, you learn to take things in stride. You begin to crave respect and comfort and adventure, all at the same time. You lay in your bed, fearing death, just like you did.You pull lint off your shirt. You smile less and feel content more. You think about changing and then often, you do.

When you get older, you barely notice it at all. Then, you are sitting somewhere you’ve been before, staring at the nothingness of the sky, and you feel the wind moving away from you, fast and almost impossible to catch.

—  When You Get Older, thefrenemy
Quality ML Tropes
  • “Tikki I am so in love with Adrien Agreste” “Ok well then why don’t you talk to him?” “no”
  • “Gosh Nino Marinette is such a good friend. She’s so friendly! I really appreciate her in my life!” “That’s awesome man you should tell her that, I think it would mean a lot.” “Uh….no”
  • “Tikki I really do love Chat Noir but I wish he would stop flirting with me. I don’t reciprocate his feelings and it makes my life so much more complicated because I worry all the time about letting him down.” “Maybe say so? He’d never do anything to make you uncomfortable on purpose!!” “Oh, I couldn’t-”
  • “Plagg do you think that Marinette has a crush on me???” “idk kid why don’t you ask her?” “nO!”
  • [post accidental reveal] “TIKKI Adrien can’t possibly like me for me !!!!!!!!!!!! He only loves me because I’m ladybug!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can’t possibly be together with him my HEAR TIS BROKEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” “Or what if. And i might be stretching here Marinette but what if. You had an open and healthy dialogue about your feelings and concerns to resolve this issue” “nO TIKKI WHY WOULD I EVER-”

anonymous asked:

"crazy detention stories"...go

They’re really not that crazy I don’t think but fine- but as I had detention at least once a week for 3 years you’re only getting the highlights here:

  • So again, I only ever got detentions because I was late to school basically every day. Every single day, the office wrote me a late slip with my name spelled horrendously wrong. Different spelling every day. The most famous butchering was writing my name as “Millie Hoagie”. On my very last day of high school, I was predictably late, and they spelled my name perfectly correctly.
  • So listen my ‘reputation’ in school was basically “quiet good girl who’s never done anything wrong, ever, in her life” and “teacher’s pet” and the like. And despite the fact I was there every time all the ‘Bad Kids™’ who were also always in detention were always incredibly surprised to see me??? Like they never got over it. Every time I walked into the damn room at least half the class would be like “MOLLY YOU DON’T BELONG HERE YOU’RE INNOCENT!!” 😂
  • Also despite the fact I was basically invisible in the school as a whole all the trouble makers knew me by name because, and I quote a kid from my 10th grade Spanish class who was trying to hook up with me at the time here, “Guys like me are afraid of you, Girl, we’re just plain out scared that we gonna corrupt you!” and I still don’t know what he actually meant by that???
  • Bu anyway, this apparent rep usually gave me an upper hand with the teachers monitoring the detentions. Because, you know, some were fine, some were bitchy, some were insane. But all of them were pissed about the fact they had to be there instead of heading home.
  • The rules of detention were literally just ‘stare at the wall and don’t talk’, depending on which teacher they might let the students do homework. But since I was apparently a great person and always had the class’ incredulous response to me being in the room, they usually let me get away with sleeping or reading a book lol.
  • Of course…no one said any of the other kids were inclined to following the rules lmao. These were like, all the class clowns™ shoved into one room. Things always got real funny real fast.
  • It would always start off with the coughing game. If you’ve ever stepped into a school you should know what that is.
  • It would then escalate to everyone in the room playing catch whenever the teacher looked away for a brief moment
  • Detention was always in the health classroom so someone always tried to steal a limb off the skeleton without being to obvious
  • Some teachers would let people talk ‘quietly’ so jokes were fucking abound
  • One time I was minding my own damn business and a kid slides me a note saying ‘in like five minutes ask to go to the bathroom but head downstairs to the English wing’ before he snuck out without the teacher noticing. I get down there and he’s at one end of the hallway and another boy is at the other end. Upon seeing me, these boys run full speed down the hall at each other, leap up in the air when they get to the direct center, high five with full force, both scream in pain, and then hit the floor, clutching their hands. I was cracking the fuck up and trying to convince them to go to the nurse but they wouldn’t listen. I asked the guy why the hell they did that. He told me ‘because we wanted a witness and no one will ever believe you’ 😂😂
  • One time my sorta-neighbor Mike comes in and the teacher asked why he had detention and apparently, the principal had asked him where to find his friend Jose, and Mike responded “he’s out picking cotton” and the principal flipped out at what he perceived to be a racist joke and gave him a month detention. But the thing was, Jose was in an agriculture class and he was literally outside picking cotton that they had planted there earlier. Jose found it fucking hilarious and refused to tell the principal to get his friend out of trouble.
  • As I haven’t been inside a school building for quite some time now I don’t know if turtling is still a thing but it was…quite an epidemic for my senior class.
  • It’s when you turn someone’s backpack inside out right? But it was a full blown war with these kids. Trust no one. Never leave the room. Never look away. Holy shit. One of the best moments of this occurred in detention, when a boy reached to get a book out of his backpack to find it was gone. After 15 minutes of searching the room, he found it, turtled, hidden in a filing cabinet in the front of the room. Everyone, including the teacher, was loosing their shit, because how did someone pull that off so quietly and invisibly without someone noticing??? No one fessed up. The class was in fear of the turtle ninja for the rest of the month, but they never struck again. No one ever discovered who it was.
  • Guys: It was me.
  • One time it was raining and the teacher was in a bad mood so he insisted all the windows stay open. He left for a bathroom break or something and this one poor kid, who was now completely soaked as he was stuck with a window seat, just said “fucking bye” and just…climbed out the damn window. Left his backpack and everything. Didn’t see him again for at least a month.
  • There was one guy who always sold ice cream out of his bag when the teachers weren’t looking. Where he was getting it from and how it stayed frozen is beyond me.
  • Oh my God sometimes all the indie singer kids would just come and sit on the floor outside the classroom and talk loudly to annoy us??? The hell were they trying to accomplish??? Your singing ain’t special and you won’t be famous, please let us die in peace.
  • One kid had detention because when we were running laps in gym class he jumped up to hit the arch of the ceiling and accidentally set off the fire alarm. The teacher that day insisted on continuously referring to him as ‘the delinquent’, as if no one else in the room had broken the rules or something
  • One time one of the gym teachers was in charge of it and long story short he started doing the jersey turnpike. True horror.
  • One time the teacher got a call and she had to go down to the office and the second she was gone this one kid’s friend runs in with a huge tray going “Y’ALL I STOLE THE LASAGNE CUPCAKES FROM THE FOOD AND NUTRITION CLASSROOM” and we dined like kings.
  • Everyone would sometimes just break out in song for no God damn reason
  • One time one of the guys in charge of the detention was A) Not someone anyone recognized as a teacher and B) Potentially Stanley Tucci. Like…I was about 80% certain that this guy was Stanley Tucci.
  • He refused to confirm or deny or even give a name
  • One time I was really absorbed in my book when all the sudden a letter flew onto my desk, an anonymous sender that just said “You have a soft, sexy voice.” Neither of which is true, I’m pretty sure, and I could not for the life of me figure out who sent it omfg
  • One time a teacher was freaking out because he went to a psychic over the weekend and was told there was a lot of activity around him so I looked him straight in the eyes and told him I’m a medium and I can see that the devil had marked his soul and he threw me out of the room and refused to take that class for detention ever again😂
  • It was a hot summers day. The ceiling fans were on their highest setting. A boy nudges me, with a small carton of ice cream in his hands under his desk. “What do you think would happen if I scooped out a huge chunk of this and threw it at the fan?” he whispered. “Jamil, no.” I pleaded, but it fell on deaf ears. Soon, the room was filled with confused screams.
  • Apparently all the other regulars™ had bought me candy grams around Christmas time so they were confused when I showed up to detention with no candy and apparently the student council member sent them all to the other Molly in the grade because she was the popular one and this lead to about 12 boys grumbling for two and a half hours like “The one damn time I attempt to be a gentleman” and “I know where she lives” and “Gonna gingerbread her fucking locker” I could not stop laughing
  • Oh God okay one time the teacher we had was literally. Off the charts.
  • Like there’s the chill teachers, and then the bitchy teachers. And then this lady. She literally reminded me of Stubel
  • So I didn’t even know who she was but I walk in and do my shy smile/quiet ‘hello’ thing and take out my book so she immediately zeros in on me as ‘the good kid’ as usual
  • But she literally seemed to think every other person in this class was a hardened criminal holy shit. She was all over the place barking orders and yelling. And of course, you’ve got a room full of class clowns, like they feed off teachers like this. So the madder she got the more ridiculous they got. I was literally almost in tears trying to force myself not to laugh because I didn’t want to risk her turning on me omfg
  • So she yelled and flailed about the room and they kept going with jokes and paper wasps and lying about their names and just doing literally every thing they could possibly do so this woman wouldn’t have the chance to rest
  • This escalated with every minute and came to a resounding end when the teacher decided the Australian Kid™ was chewing gum and picked up the trashcan and shoved his face in it, screaming at him to spit it out as he yelled back “YOU’RE ONLY DOING THIS BECAUSE IM AN IMMIGRANT
  • he was in charge of all the bullshit that day and it was hysterical but he wasn’t the one chewing gum loudly that was me
  • The vp came in to see what all the yelling was about to find a teacher shoving a boy’s head in the trash, one boy shirtless as another drew tattoos on him, the phone off the line with it’s cord wrapped around a kid’s neck, two boys dueling with skeleton arms, one kid with her leg out the window, a kid tying a skeleton foot to the ceiling fan, rubber bands and paper wasps flying from every angle, three people turtling backpacks, someone brandishing an epi-pen, sexual hangman being played on the chalkboard, someone eating ice cream and fanning himself with money, and me, crying into my book with my hand literally bleeding from all my efforts to not laugh at what I was witnessing
  • We never saw her in detention again😂
  • My one younger friend got a detention for being late and was really shaken up about it and I tried to tell her she’d be fine but then she got caught sliding me chocolate animal crackers during it, and subsequently got another detention because of this; somehow I was not viewed as an equally guilty party and didn’t get in trouble
  • This one guy came in complaining “You guys all told me to get a twitter and I get thrown in twitter jail my first day!” “That’s like a thousand tweets in one day, how the fuck did you mange that?” “Bitch I had a lot to say about McDonalds!”
  • One teacher came in and was like “I don’t feel like helping with homework but does anyone wanna learn how to hack a computer?”
  • Someone got caught pouring water out the window but when the teacher looked to see why she saw the youngest of the goats™ standing under the window with it’s mouth open waiting for more
  • One time the teacher wouldn’t let me go to the bathroom and after I asked for like the 5th time he said “It can’t be that important!” so I just pulled a pad out of my backpack and silently sat it on my desk while glaring at him and this 40 year old man looked like he was about to pass out and he finally let me go
  • I remember our final detention of senior year we were told that if we skip it we can’t graduate so everyone went into that room with a ridiculously nostalgic attitude and one guy finally stole the skull off the skeleton and we fucking tossed it around the entire time while singing and blatantly ignoring the teacher’s complaining lmao
  • I know there’s more but it’s 7am and this is long so all in all like…I do not miss high school but some memories are bearable lmao
teen wolf as types of moms

scott mccall

  • soccer mom af
  • helps his kids with their projects and assignments
  • somehow manages kids, spouse, and work all at once
  • shows up at every one of his kid’s recitals or games or whatever
  • always has a full container of brownies or cookies in the car
  • prepared for everything
  • organized af
  • claps a little too loudly at his kid’s dance recital
  • shows off his kids to his coworkers all the time
  • all the other moms are jealous of him

stiles stilinski

  • helicopter mom
  • he’d just be so worried about his kids after all he’s been through in his life
  • no sunscreen under spf 70
  • super nosy
  • thinks of worst-case scenarios first
  • “i told you so"
  • attends every teacher-parent interview
  • can turn a playful conversation into a lecture in under 2 seconds
  • his kids sometimes feel like he doesn’t give them enough space
  • but they know that he means well for them

malia hale

  • hot mess mom
  • forgets she has kids sometimes
  • forgets important events
  • “i thought your hockey game was next week?”
  • “mom, you said that last week.”
  • accidentally gave her children dog treats instead of crackers to school
  • always running late
  • coffee in her hand 24/7
  • ready-made dinners
  • forgets to make cupcakes for bakesales so she brings storebought ones and says that their her own

lydia martin

  • cool mom
  • hot mom
  • is v laidback
  • “kids will always be kids”
  • does hot yoga
  • she guides her kids, not control them
  • a tough discipliner
  • doesn’t approve of disrespect
  • all her kids’ friends want her as their mom
  • dresses her kids in only hermes, YSL, lacoste, burberry, prada, gucci, chanel, and/or armani

catfruits  asked:

Okay, so, I'd love to read a little something by you set in a world where Lavender made it out of the Battle of Hogwarts. Maybe not okay, but alive?

Once upon a time, Lavender had wanted everyone to look at her. She had been the kind of kid who put on dramatic plays for her stuffed animals, for any visitors to the house, and for any neighbor or passersby she could snag from the front yard.

Dating Ron in sixth year had been fun, most of all because everyone had kept sneaking glances at her. She had heard her name in curious whispers and she had grinned and giggled into Parvati’s shoulder.

Everyone was looking now, or pretending not to. She heard the whispers– oh it’s that poor Brown girl. Can you imagine, if it was your daughter, if it was you? Oh and she was so pretty before, too–what a pity–almost makes it worse, doesn’t it?

“You know Professor Lupin was a werewolf?” Hermione said, ten minutes into a very awkward lunch she had asked for in an equally awkward letter.

Lavender pushed a sauteed carrot through a little puddle of pasta sauce. “I think everyone heard about that one. Someone told the papers, or something, right?”

“Er, yes,” said Hermione. “Snape did. Which is what I– I mean, it’s related. Oh, I wish you’d gotten to talk to Remus about this. He was a lovely man.”

“Not as lovely as Lockhart,” Lavender said and she and Hermione spent a moment in wistful remembrance. “God, I feel old,” Lavender said.

“Anyway, Snape,” said Hermione. “Snape and Lupin. When Lupin was at school, Snape would make him a potion that would… tame him, on full moons. He could just curl up in his office and sleep by the fire. If you’re interested, I’m trying to learn how to brew it myself.”

Lavender shook her head. “We’re not friends,” she said. “Never have been. So why are you doing all this?”

Hermione looked like she was trying to say “we’re friends,” but she couldn’t get it out. “I was there, once, when Lupin turned without the potion. I was so scared. I thought we were going to die.”

“Afraid I’ll sniff you out on a dark night?” Lavender said, face twisting as she sank back into her wicker chair.

“No, I–” Hermione squeezed her eyes shut, and all the hesitation was making Lavender more and more uncomfortable. Even at eleven, Hermione had bulldozed through things. She didn’t waver. “I was so scared, but I think it was even worse for him. It hurt, but he looked so scared, too, I–”

“I know how it feels,” said Lavender, very quietly, and Hermione snapped her mouth shut. Lavender took a big sip from her tea. It was still steaming– it had not taken long to exhaust small talk, between the two of them.

Hermione cleared her throat and tried again. “I’m trying to do the right thing. I’m trying to make amends. I’m trying to– make things better. Do you want this?”

Lavender put her mug back down, shaking out scalded fingers, and said, “Yes.” Then, because her mother had raised her right, she said, “Thank you.”

“That sounds like a weird conversation,” said Parvati, whose door Lavender went and knocked on after she and Hermione had split the bill with the precise-to-the-Knut math of the vaguely acquainted and recently employed.

Lavender kicked through the fall of autumn leaves that had collected in front of the porch swing. “She was trying to be nice, I think.”

“She’s not very good at it,” said Parvati.

-

Her father wept. He tried not to but he was a crier, always had been.

“You were so brave,” said Lavender’s mother, cupping her cheeks in her warm hands and not even flinching at the scar tissue under her palms. “We are so proud.”

Lavender’s mother was a Muggleborn, daughter of a math teacher and a door-to-door salesman (“now there is a profession that requires some magic,” her grandfather used to tell her).

Her father was a wizard and he was trying hard not to cry, bending down to pet the dogs weaving between all their ankles. Lavender bent down, too, scratching behind Fiddlestick’s floppy ears while Mopsy cleaned her cheek forcefully. “Hey,” she said, and her father looked up, trying to firm his wobbly chin.

“You know I’m proud of you, too,” he said, trying not to tremble on it. “I just…” He reached out to squeeze her knee gently. “You did everything right. You did everything good. I’m so proud of you, chickadee.”

“I know,” she said, and she did. He was a Gryffindor, too.

-

It took Hermione more than a month to figure out the potion sufficiently well enough that she’d let Lavender try it. She was founding a non-profit for nonhuman rights, too, after all, as well as doing a fair few local speaking gigs, petitioning the Wizenagamot on a half dozen issues, getting an advanced degree, and supposedly, at some point, sleeping.

It took more than a month, so Lavender spent another night locked in her parents’ newly fortified cellar. She didn’t remember much, but she woke up with her throat sore and her nails ragged. The door was gouged from the inside. She wondered if she had been screaming. She wondered if that’s what the howls were. She felt like screaming, maybe, a little.

The door cracked open the moment the moon had dropped down below the horizon, outside. Her mother came in with a tray of her favorite breakfast foods– danishes and boiled eggs, steaming hot cocoa with the barest splash of bitter coffee in it.

Parvati came stomping down the stairs after her. “Graceful,” said Lavender. She winced at the roughness of her voice.

“Look who’s talking,” said Parvati. “Up, c'mon, eat your breakfast. We’re doing midnight manicures. Your dad says he’ll let us doll up his nails, too.”

The next full moon night, Lavender locked herself in the cellar again. “It should be safe,” Hermione had said. “It should. I mean, I’ve done all the tests. I followed all the instructions. It should work.”

Lavender didn’t remember, because she never remembered– she didn’t recall the cellar door unlocking and opening after ten minutes of post-moonrise silence. She didn’t recall Parvati Wingardium Leviosa-ing a comfy chair down the stairs, or her sitting down and pulling out a stack of Witch Weeklys, nor did she remember curling up on Parvati’s fuzzy button slippers and going to sleep.

But she did remember waking up in the morning, her cheek pressed into a soft pillow. She was tattered under a thick blanket, but she was human and looking upward at Parvati’s slack, sleeping face. Her dark plaits tumbled, curling, over the soft pink polka dots of her pajamas.

Lavender pulled herself up to sitting, stole the open Witch Weekly, and waited for Parvati to wake up.

-

“You’re going to be alright,” Professor Trelawney said and she wasn’t even looking at Lavender’s palm, just holding her hand tight in her cold fingers. “You’re going to be happy. You’re going to be fine. People are going to love you and stand by you and we will be there.”

The tower room was just the same as Lavender remembered it, down to the spicy-sweet tea and Trelawney’s big blinking eyes. Lavender squeezed her hands back. “I love you, too, professor.”

“You know, I think you can call me Sybil. It seems the time for it.”

Dean and Seamas’s housewarming for their ugly little first flat was a crowded mess, but the afterparty wasn’t. Lavender and Parvati came by with paint swatches, opinions, and hangover remedies. They ate greasy Chinese food on the floor, because it was about as comfortable as the couch.

They came back the next week, and the next. Parvati conjured a crackling fire in a big fruit bowl Dean’s mother had given him and they all sat around it like they were back at Gryffindor Tower’s hearths, procrastinating on homework.

On nights like that they sometimes talked about Hogwarts, but most of the time they didn’t. Dean had started drawing again and he walked them through his notebooks– his sisters, caricatures of the customers he dealt with in Ollivander’s wand shop, the snarky little comics he’d always scrawled in the edges of his notes. Parvati told them about the Auror trainees’ antics, going ut on their first field missions with their mentors. “All bravado and caffeine,” she said. “Bunch of show-offs.”

“So you fit in well, then?” Dean said.

“Nah, that’s Lav,” Parvati said. Dean and Seamas glanced warily at Lavender, but she just giggled and reached for another potsticker.

Seamas was considering going back to school. “Hermione’s been badgering me about it,” he said. “Says I have a talent for pyrotechnics, and there’s a whole major for fire magics at Brinxley.”

“What about you, Lav?” said Dean. “You still thinking about vet school?”

“What?”

“Oh, uh, that’s the Muggle word. Veterinarian– a medimagizoologist?”

“The schools aren’t too interested in a werewolf as a student,” Lavender said, shrugging.

“Not that that stops Hermione from showing up on the doorstep with half-penned anti-discrimination lawsuits she wants Lav to star in,” Parvati said.

“When does she sleep?” said Dean.

Little children asked about it in the street sometimes. “Mum, why’s her face like that?” “How come she’s walking all funny?”

Sometimes their parents turned to Lavender with eager bright eyes in the grocery store line, expecting her to answer. (“I got hurt, but I’m okay now.”) Sometimes they shushed their kids and gave her little apologetic half-smiles, glancing away from the raised lines of scar tissue. Sometimes they pulled their children closer to them and crossed to the other side of the street.

Harry Potter had a godson. Teddy Lupin was four the first time Lavender met him, just outside Gringotts. Teddy clung to Harry’s pants leg, peeking past his godfather’s hanging robe. “Why’d her face do that?” he said and Harry dropped a hand down into Teddy’s hair, which was bright green.

“She’s just like your dad,” said Harry.

“Puppy,” Teddy whispered, eyes wide with joy, and his skin shifted until scars stood out stark on his smiling chubby cheeks.

Lavender bit her lip and sank down to her knees in the street, holding out a hand. “Why aren’t you handsome, chickadee. What’s your name?”

Once, Lavender had wanted everyone to look at her.

She hated stories that told you to be careful what you wished for. Were you not supposed to want things? Was that the answer? She was nearly twenty two and she could make things fly with a few whispered words. She had lived through her seventh year at Hogwarts, had stepped out into that battle with her wand out and her eyes open. She had woken up–hurting, wounds tended, poison in her veins–to Parvati sleeping on Sybil’s shoulder at her bedside.

She had cried when they told her about the lycanthropy. She had cried over her bunny because a fox had gotten to it. Both times it had been with her face buried in Parvati’s shoulder and Parvati’s hands stroking her hair. She wished and she wanted– animals that never left you, bodies that never betrayed you.

Once, Lavender had wished that everyone would look at her, and now they were. Everyone was looking– so Lavender held Parvati’s hand in the grocery store at midnight, because they had both been craving green apples. Everyone was looking– so Lavender curled her hair and pinned it up, wore tank tops and little skirts on any day hot enough that she could get away with it, laughed aloud in public spaces. Everyone was looking– so Lavender knocked on Hermione Granger’s door one evening and asked, “What would it take to get me into magical vet school?”

Hermione had her bushy hair all tied back and a quill behind each ear. “A lot. There’s some statutes we’ve got to fight, and even if we can handle that you’ll still be under intense scrutiny for years.”

“I can work with that,” said Lavender, and Hermione grinned.

When Teddy marched down the aisle with the rings, his hair was a shimmering swirl of pink and purple to match the flowers woven into Parvati’s braids and Lavender’s curls.

The honeymoon would be short–a week in magical Paris in the townhouse of a Beauxbaton girl they’d befriended fourth year. Lavender had more medical textbooks packed into her luggage than anything else. Parvati’s bags were lined with half-finished reports that she’d owl to Auror headquarters from a rumpled Parisian morning, getting croissant crumbs in the bedsheets.

But for now the hall was filled with pink and purple blooms, white candles, familiar faces. Hermione stood in a violet bridesmaid’s dress, and Dean and Seamus in matching ties at Parvati and Lavender’s respective backs. Padma was luminescent with joy over Parvati’s shoulder. She had taken Lavender aside that morning for a short quiet walk in the mist and told her, “I know tonight’s what makes it official, but I’ve thought of you as my sister for years.”

When Lavender leaned forward and kissed her wife, her father burst into proud tears in the front row. He was a crier, always had been. Lavender buried her face in Parvati’s shoulder, smiling so hard she thought she might come apart. Her scars creased and puckered in her dimples, and she was beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.

“I didn’t find out that I liked teaching until I was 45 years old. I was working as a graphic designer, and I volunteered to teach a group of kids from a poor region. It was part of a special program aimed at teenagers who’d dropped out of school. At first I was scared. Many of them had behavior problems. Some of them were addicted to drugs. One of them even brought a knife to class. But I discovered that I could really connect with them. Sometimes I could even reach kids that refused to talk to psychologists. I learned that I could transform someone’s life just by listening. The program only lasted six months, but it gave me such sense of satisfaction. I’ve been training for the last two years to become a real teacher. My test results just arrived and I got assigned to the school I wanted. I’m going to teach Portuguese to elementary school students.”

(Montevideo, Uruguay)

From the Other Side of the Signing Table

“I don’t know what to say to you,” the girl said. “Um, thanks, I guess.”

“Thanks is good,” I replied.

Silence stretched, punctuated only by the scuffle of a Sharpie on a page.

We were in the same boat, the girl and I — both at a book festival, both at the end of a long day full of people, both in a signing line that had been going on for an hour already. There was only one big difference between us: she was on one side of the table, and I was on the other. Sometimes that difference seems to matter more than others.

Before I was published, I read a lot of accounts of what it was like to have your work out there, but I never read anything about what it was like to have yourself out there. I suppose I never really thought about it, to tell you the truth. I thought you wrote a book and hopefully people liked it and if I thought about book tours at all, I figured they involved standing on a stage for a bit before disappearing into a rental car. The truth, however, is that now — ten years and fifteen novels in to my career — most of my hours in front of people are spent in a signing line. Forty minutes on a stage or behind a table for a panel, and then two or three hours meeting a few hundred strangers. I had no idea what it would be like.

This is what it’s like.


Keep reading

4

kiss practice? idk really.

i just think lance deserves the world’s affection and love.

~Masterlist~

Donate 

Originally posted by t-yong

→ NCT as Horror Movie Character Stereotypes 

→ NCT as Teen Movie Characters

→ NCT as Mythical Creatures

NCT Patronus…Kind Of

NCT Drabble Game Masterlist

► A-Z: NSFW

→ A-Z: NSFW | M | Series

• [Taeil] [Hansol] [Johnny] [Taeyong] [Yuta] [Doyoung] [Ten] [Jaehyun] [WinWin

► A-Z: Daddy

→ A-Z: Daddy | Series

• [Taeil] [Hansol] [Johnny] [Taeyong] [Yuta] [Doyoung] [Ten] [Jaehyun] [WinWin]

► Reactions

  1. You cover their cherry bomb choreography
  2. Your gg covers their song (+ you’re the rapper)

► Taeyong

Downtown Girl | bf!taeyong
•  dating rumors really suck

Bubble Bubble | hp!au
•  cuddles with hufflepuff!taeyong

Welcome Home | bf!taeyong
•  tired cuddles with tae

Will You? | we got married!au | Series
•  youre participating in wgm with taeyong, enjoy
→ [1] [2] [3] [4] [5]

A New Day | vampire!au | M | Series
•  this happened because i saw the queen of the damned for the first time in years at 2am while i was drinking
→ [1]

Ride Or Die | runaway!taeyong | M | Series
•  taeyongs the weird kid but its all good
→ [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [Final]

Butterfly Effect | Series
•  every choice you make matters so…what do you choose?
→ [Prologue]

Don’t Think Twice | 60′s AU
•   diner workers dont get much more fun that strangers with stories

► Ten

Just One Drop | vampire!au
•  ten really needs to eat even if you have to force him 

Fallen | angel!au | M | Series
•  when you have a mangled and blood man on your porch what more can you do that…let him in the house?
→ [1]

► Johnny

There’s Something in the Water | water nymph!au
•  summer break + babysitting + strange dude what could go wrong  

Thieves In The Night | goblin!au
•  stuff just keeps going missing ft. taeyong

Two Sides Of The Same Coin | psychiatrist!au | M |Series
•  i call this the ‘liz cant stop reading dr. crane fanfic’ fanfic
→ [1]

Not All Can See | imaginary friend!au
•  what kid doesn’t conjure up an imaginary friend?

Forgive Me Father |  M |  roleplay!au 
•  halloween got a lil kinky oops

► Yuta

Just A Myth | merman!au
•  discover creatures of the deep blue sea

Why You Little… | bf!yuta
• yuta sucks at video games lol

In The Daylight | hybrid!au | M | Series
•  i watched the film theory  on the blair witch project and this happened. srry
→ [1]

Eyes On You |  M |  gang!yuta ft. 127
•  yuta has an interesting kink…

Call You | brother’s best friend!au
•  it happens to everyone dont lie

Snakes of a Scale Slither Together | hp!au
•  idk man. yuta x doyoung kinda sorta not really

Pretty Kitty |  M |  roleplay!au
•   i should just deactivate

► WinWin

Fresh Air Helps | bf!sicheng
•  summer night drives

A Helping Hand | afterlife guide!au
• death isnt the end and youre certainly not alone in it

► Doyoung

Knock Knock | creepypasta!inspired        
•  i ever mentioned i hate mirrors

Final Moments | reaper!au        
•  the only constant was him

► Mark

Found You | hybrid!au
•  happy hunting guys  

Hushed Whispers | shadow people!au
• sometimes stories you tell your kids kinda are true ??

Sweet As Sugar |  hp!au
•  last minute birthday fluff thingie

► Jaehyun

Protection | demon!au
•  sometimes a savior isnt on the side of the angels    

► Taeil

Sweetest Scent | hybrid!au
•  some scents just…sooth the senses  

I’m The One | psychiatrsit!au
• doctors come and doctors go, maybe you can get him to speak

► Haechan

Hands to Myself | idol!au
•  dancing is always easier with a partner

Far Far Away | bf!haechan
•  long distance relationship + skyping  

Those Who Watch | angel!au
• your only job is to watch and protect

Originally posted by blondejongin

► A-Z: NSFW

→ A-Z: NSFW | M | Series

• [Xiumin] [Luhan] [Kris] [Suho] [Lay] [Chen] [Chanyeol] [Baekhyun] [D.O.] [Kai] [Sehun]

Originally posted by soohuis

► A-Z: NSFW

→ A-Z: NSFW | M | Series

•    [S.Coups] [Jeonghan] [Joshua] [Jun] [Hoshi] [Wonwoo] [Woozi] [DK] [Mingyu] [The8] [Seungkwan] [Vernon] [Dino]

Originally posted by beautifulqirls

► A-Z: NSFW

→ A-Z: NSFW | M | Series

•  [Hyorin] [Bora] [Soyou] [Dasom]

► Hyorin

Lick The Icing Off | M | gf!au
•  birthday smut for my friend <3

Originally posted by hostoria

► A-Z: NSFW

→ A-Z: NSFW | M | Series

•  [Kyungil] [Dokyun] [Sihyoung] [Jaeho] [Yijeong]

Originally posted by monstaxmemes

► A-Z: NSFW

→ A-Z: NSFW | M | Series

•  [Shownu] [Wonho] [Minhyuk] [Kihyun] [Hyungwon] [Jooheon] [I.M]

Originally posted by stanbap

► A-Z: NSFW

→ A-Z: NSFW | M | Series

•  [Yongguk] [Himchan] [Daehyun] [Youngjae] [Jongup] [Zelo]

► A-Z: NSFW

→ A-Z: NSFW | M | Series

•  [EXY] [Seola] [Xuan Yi] [Bona] [Soobin] [Luda] [Dawon] [Eunseo] [Cheng Xiao] [Mei Qi]


[To Do List]
[Fic Req]

Does anyone else feel like the Wade of their friend group? Like you’re the butt of every joke and even if you know everyone is kidding sometimes it cuts deep and hurts. Like, if someone looked at how you’re treated from an outside perspective they might think it’s wrong and bad but you’re used to it and you know your friends don’t mean anything by it. Idk I just feel like I’m the comedy relief and the butt of the joke and sometimes I’m okay with that while other times it makes me want to curl into a ball and cry. Like I know my friends love me, but sometimes it doesn’t feel like it.

AU where instead of going to Samwell, Jack starts a widely successful Publicly Broadcast show for children.

Jack learns that he is great with kids after coaching them for a little over two years. Moreover, kids are good with Jack. There is no pressure to be anything other than who he is.


It all starts with a local news program doing a fluff piece on Jack Zimmermann’s coaching ability. But then it turned into something completely different when Jack skated onto camera and started to introduce every single one of his kids and what was special about them. He was…really enchanting actually. He didn’t ever really talk down to them. Jack just treated them as a tiny friend. 

They ARE his tiny friends, but that’s not the point. 

The footage they got of “snack time” was really the best. Imagine a good 16 kids piled around this massive man teaching them the best way to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. 

 It should have been obvious that a local channel would contact him. It still surprises Jack. They want him to host a show? Why? Everyone always teased him about how impersonable he was during interviews. Is it because he’s Jack Zimmermann’s son? Or Alicia’s? 

Jack asks all of these questions to his mother and she just laughs. “You made a PB&J interesting to 16 kids just by being you”

Jack figures it wouldn’t hurt to give it a shot. 

Keep reading

Don't take my lawn decorations.

I had purchased my first home in a slightly lower class area of town, which is pretty close to an even lower class area of town. (Think slightly ghetto a mile from absolute trailer trash.) I know most of my immediate neighbors, since most of them are pretty loud and I’d rather be friendly with them than have them be my enemy.

Some local kid likes to go around collecting trash in his free time. A real nice kid, does it for really no reason. Whenever I see him, I usually get him a drink, lemonade or soda so he can stay hydrated. (California is hot.) Sometimes I give him a few dollars, I offer the kid $30 a month to mow my lawn 2x a month. So, kid has a gig for small, but consistent income.

The kid takes a lot of pride in his work. He mows the lawn, pulls weeds, moves rocks out of the driveway, and just makes my place look extra nice, even though I don’t even ask him to do any extra work. This guy is great.

This goes on for a few years, kid is now a senior in highschool. Family is not doing so great, dad just lost his main source of income, and mom had accumulated debt which put a lot of stress on their failing marriage. Mom was abusive verbally and sometimes physically to both the kid, and the Father. But the kid keeps on walking, doing work, volunteering and being a real happy, up beat dude.

Despite his troubles at home, the kid starts buying lawn decorations. Mostly small, little gnomes, some decorative rocks, and bird bath, and he decorates my yard. It looks amazing, but I knew he must have spent a lot of his own money on that. I try to reimburse him, and he denies. He won’t take it.
I know he needs a car, and I was about to get a newer one for myself, so I gave my mine for free. It really was the least I could do for this guy for everything he has done for me.

A few weeks later, a drunk driver T bones the kid, and he dies on the scene. I was devastated, his parents were devastated, and they soon after got a divorce.

They were fighting over who gets what, and the father discovers that the mother had a drug addiction she had been hiding. Straight out of left field. She wants everything they had, and she lawyers up to fight the battle. Due to the debt the mother had accumulated on the father’s bank account, he had really no money. And nobody knew where she got her money from.
As sad as it is, it’s not my affair. Until she sent me a letter claiming that the yard decorations are rightfully hers, and that she will take them “or else”. Now, this is a problem.

I get it, you lost your only child. You’re in a lot of pain as a parent. But you were never a good parent to him. I was closer to him than you, by a long shot.
So, I had a meeting with the father, and told him not to worry about the court costs. I decided I was going to fund him in court.

Long story short about their divorce battle, but he wins, and gets to keep everything, and even gets a restraining order on her. He then files for credit card fraud, and puts all the debt on her.

I heard from the father that she was recently arrested for driving while drunk, and was search and has a decent stash of meth on her. She is currently awaiting trial for that, while the father is living a life now relatively stress free.
And I got to keep my lawn decorations.
RIP Johnathan. You are missed.

The types and what I think of them based on what I've seen from my friends(and probably a little insulting)

~as an INTJ

INTP
- quiet
- can make a bitch face that makes you cry
- probably thinks u stupid
- says that MBTI is shit
- fashionista
- has an ENFP friend(“ENFP no!”)
- savage
- that friend who has ultra weird ideas when drunk
- probably most adorable smile on earth
- smart
- most of the time just rising eyebrows and blinking

ENTJ
- bossy af
- prima ballerina
- she is beauty she is grace
- she will punch you in da face
- always in warm socks
- also an actress
- knows how to build things
- basically good at everything
- will shout at you if you do something wrong
- probably slept with almost all male friends

ENTP
- a n n o y i n g AF
- never shuts up
- meme queen
- so loud
- not funny jokes
- make up queen
- at least smart
- thinks she’s better than you(and maybe she is)
- if you take a sip from her mug u die
- has an ENFP slave
- kinda selfish
- another fashionista
- if she laughs the whole room laughs with her
- soooo much self confidence wow

INFP
- THAT SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE
- garbage lord
- writer buddy
- has ton of OC’s AND GAY SHIPS
- cannot into decisions
- junky food
- understands(really)
- don’t like loud people
- constant lala land
- savage without even noticing
- 4w5
- has 8 minute long video of herself eating french fries on her phone
- impressive self control
- cute laugh
- cute
- the best person to rant with

ENFP
- can’t stay in one place for a minute
- suddenly disappears in a middle of a party
- daydreaming a lot
- cheerful
- likes to drink A LOT
- too many friends
- nice for everyone ugh
- that laugh which sounds like a puppy riding a pink bicycle in a tuxedo
- can bring ENTP back to earth

ENFJ
- mom friend
- has too many friends HOW IS IT EVEN POSSIBLE
- gonna steal your friends without even noticing
- likes fancy drinks and kitschy things
- obsessed with doggos
- sudden outbursts of anger
- hypochondriac
- really anxious when driving
- doesn’t understand a concept of a personal space

ISTJ
- another bitch face
- can rise one eyebrow HOW U DO DIS?????
- doesn’t understand memes
- smart
- lack of self confidence
- secretly hates u
- wears comfy clothes but looks so good
- has a lot of savings but hardly ever uses them
- they knows better ok? don’t even try to tell them that they are wrong
- don’t particularly like pets
- perfect teeth
- so so so smart once again
- sometimes are rather calm but sometimes… don’t ask

ESTJ
- that kid who asks too many questions during your presentation
- constant bitch face
- hot
- stingy
- falls asleep during parties
- a rant person
- bossy
- hard working
- teachers like her

ESFJ
- will help you EVEN WHEN YOU HAVENT ASKED FOR HELP
- has a lot of friends
- drinks a lot
- hard-working
- daddy’s little princess/mama’s boy
- assertive
- smoking a lot
- tells everyone what to do

ISTP
- white Kanye West
- would kill u if u did something with his shoes
- likes weird electronic genres of music I can’t even name
- on 9gag all the time
- knows all memes
- League of Legends pro player
- can make funny faces
- looks like he was angry
- black humor(especially likes jokes about Jews)
- awkward silence gains a whole new meaning

ESFP
- the whitest person I know
- “what do u meat it was sexist?? it was funny!!!!”
- only wears yellow pants
- likes PE teacher probably a little too much
- can’t find a girlfriend
- will massage your feet if u don’t watch them properly
- has stupid ideas
- likes basically every person
- drinks wine at parties even though he says that true man should drink only vodka
- don’t know when someone is mean to him

ESTP
- loud
- hey lets go to the another city and get drunk!!! because why not
- class clown
- talks about her life too much like seriously
- and also about various secretions of her body
- probably gonna end up in jail
- smart and stupid at the same time
- lazy
- has problems with concentration
- talkative
- has problems with self-esteem which she covers acting out like a douche

Don’t take this personally lol

I feel like straight people really aren’t aware of how deeply rooted homophobia is in society. Putting gay, or any LGBT+, characters in media is just seen as a political statement. Being gay is seen as a political statement. Our lives, ignoring any other factor, is just seen as “liberal bullshit”. We can barely see ourselves in the media everyone consumes, and that’s just one factor that alienates us from society and even being seen as human. Kids today are growing up learning from what they read and watch, and excluding gay characters is one of the largest reasons for homophobia, both internal and external. The media is supposed to reflect reality; characters are meant to be related to. And when we fail to see ourselves in what is supposed to be a parallel to our lives, we fail to see ourselves as human. How are we supposed to be proud when we’ve been alienated our whole lives? We grow up hearing about the murders of people like us, we are treated as the punchline in sitcoms, we hear people complaining about pandering when a character is revealed as gay. From a young age we are taught we aren’t supposed to be treated like people. We grow up learning to hate ourselves. Straight people may think we make a big deal of seeing gay characters in media, but for some people it’s all they have to feel normal. It’s a big step for us if a character is gay. For the people who have grown up to feel disgusted with their attraction, the people who feel dirty, the people who have been kicked out of their homes or lost friends from just being, sometimes seeing a cool character who is respected by others that happens to be gay is all we have to feel better about ourselves.

Another thing I’d like to talk about with gay characters in the media is the big “coming out” stories. The only reason we need these big reveals for a character to be gay is people believe by default everyone is straight. Why? Because that’s what we are taught is normal. It has to be a surprise to be gay. Straight people really have no idea how bad homophobia is just because they don’t have to deal with it. They don’t have to worry about their parents hating them for their sexuality. Once again on the whole coming out thing, is that it’s seen as some big event. One of the first things my straight friends will ask once I reveal I’m gay is, “Do your parents accept you?”. They’re so damn eager to find out if my parents actually treat me like a human being. I’m extremely lucky to have parents who aren’t homophobic and instead only occasionally innocently insensitive. But others? They’re abused, physically and emotionally. There are kids kicked out of their homes. Sometimes kids are even killed, by their PARENTS, just for being themselves. Coming out may be just a story for straight people, but for us it’s putting our future in our hands. We are testing to see if the people who say they love us are going to keep our word. We are going to see if our dearly beloved friends and family will still see us as people. Coming out can be terrifying, as this can be the step that causes children to lose their loved ones. And it’s not their fault, but they grow to believe that. “If I wasn’t gay, they wouldn’t hate me. I’m wrong,” Is what they believe. The only reason we fucking need pride parades and pride month is to convince ourselves we aren’t monsters. The reason we need to constantly say “Wow i’m so glad to be gay” is to convince ourselves that it’s true. We are just trying to fight off all this internalized hate towards ourselves, and yet straight people still speak over us and our issues, which they are causing.

Basically straight people need to calm the fuck down and shut their mouth and let LGBT+ people see themselves in the media, because you have no idea what an impact that can have on people.

still on holiday but i wanted to do a few quick doodles, and dad!jason…..sorta….happened? i like to think little kids sometimes confuse him for captain america when he’s older, since they look so similar