Richard-Simmons

Anyway, time to focus on something else and trans man Simmons tho 

  • PreOp trans Simmons/Simmons who never plans to get an operation
  • Trans Simmons who writes up this big, long coming out speech and practices it a thousand times and waits until just the right moment and has the script in his hand, only to choke up when the time comes 
  • Grif sees what’s happening and goes “Yeah dude, we know; you always leave the toilet seat down. Don’t worry, we’re all fine with it." 
  • Sarge threatens to shoot anyone with his shotgun if they misgender Simmons 
  • Simmons runs out of T one day (because it’s hard to get ahold of hormones on a warring planet) 
  • And Grif may never remember the ammo, but he always has a couple extra tampons just in case
  • Donut helps teach Simmons some make-up tricks to make his face look more masculine
  • Simmons is always so happy when Sarge refers to the Reds as “his boys”
  • Trans Simmons and supportive Red Team
vine

Simmons be bumpin’.

The Signs as Simmons quotes
  • Aries:We need you to go to the store and buy some elbow grease and headlight fluid.
  • Taurus:Suck it, blue!
  • Gemini:I already told you, I'm Dutch Irish!
  • Cancer:Sarge's death was in the past; we need to look to the future. A future filled with Simmons!
  • Leo:Yes sir! Shit, I'm mean suck it, Blue! Goddammit, I mean Red!
  • Virgo:You're about to get Simmonsized!
  • Libra:I can't believe I donated organs for this fucking war.
  • Scorpio:Wanna talk about it?
  • Sagittarius:I don't like it when girls pay direct attention to me.
  • Capricorn:Hold on! Hold on! Don't let go!
  • Aquarius:Okay, just to be clear, I understood what you meant by that. I get that you want to shoot him with bullets.
  • Pisces:Do you ever wonder why we're here?