Proud-of-myself

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she prays to be sculpted by the sculptor, oh, she don’t see the light that’s shining deeper than the eyes can find it… maybe we have made her blind, so she tries to cover up her pain, and cut her woes away. ‘cause cover girls don’t cry after their face is made.

So hurrah! Three years on and it’s easier to walk up the stairs, fit into a plane seat and find clothes that don’t have to be adjusted by my mum! I have by no means a perfect body but it is, thankfully, somewhat healthier and fitter. It was a tough realisation in which I essentially had to change my priorities completely and it left me with a lot of confusion about myself… what I like doing, ideas for future plans etc BUT looking at this now I can tell you it’s been worth every
“no thank you” and bead of sweat, and it will never stop being
a challenge and that’s okay. 

So make 2017 all that you want it to be, for the sake of your health, both mental and physical. Don’t feel guilty about taking time on yourself; self care is important. And celebrate every victory great or small!

Still here, still living. Life is good.

Today I went to school as Frida Kahlo, I knew I had to do something for myself as a Hispanic girl to instill pride and confidence in myself. Today dressing as Frida and walking with my chin up really helped me and others. Today I was complimented from head to toe. Today I was called beautiful, courageous, and strong by many girls, women, Latinos, strangers and my friends. Today a fellow Latina looked me up and down and said she loved what I was representing with my dead flower crown and makeup. Today I didn’t feel scared.

Kind of proud of myself for today...

Yesterday (Saturday 21/01/17) I had a headspace melt down and depression took over my mind, I stayed on my bed/in my bedroom most of the day. Today (Sunday), I was determined to not let those thoughts and worries of my life keep a hold of me. It’s just gone midnight on Sunday evening and I’m laying here in bed feeling proud of myself for how I handled today. I didn’t let the thoughts defeat me, I came up with a plan in my head, used it effectively and matched that with keeping myself busy. I worked through my to-do list, spent time with family, spoke to my girlfriend throughout the day and kept my depression under control.

What I need to constantly remember is that not everyday is perfect, some will be near that and others will just be a case of getting through the day. What counts is that I enjoy the small things, the things that make me smile, the moments that are enjoyable. Then when things seem bad, use those memories to aid me through. It’s all a process, this journey is a process, just as life is a process really…✌🏼💕

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“Ghosts”

Undertale belongs to Toby Fox

So guess who decided to draw things instead of getting sleep or do their homework? This is literally the neatest I have ever drawn anything like wow I actually tried this time. I’m proud of myself :)

Here’s the catch. I drew this on the back of an old algebra work sheet.

I hope people will understand why Flowey is included here.

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for @diving-in-alcohol : Ravenna (Basilica di Sant'Apollinare in Classe, San Vitale)

mood: spectacular views, marvelling at the mosaicos, listening to loud music with headphones and constantly fearing others can hear it, antique shops

When they said “one day, you’ll wake up and realise he was just a douchebag” I never believed it.
But today, today you weren’t the first thing that popped up in my mind.
I didn’t imagine you next to me or check my phone to expect something from you.
Today, I feel better, like I’ve taken one huge step.
Because today, I feel happier.
Finally, happier without you.

Well shit. I popped a stitch. This one spot has been stinging and burning more than the other spots and today I found the little plastic stitch just chilling on my pad. Sooo yup that happened. I must of moved wrong or something. I looked it up and everything says I shouldn’t need a new stitch especially since I only had a 1st degree labia tear. So I guess I just gotta be more careful and make sure I use my pain spray because sometimes it hurts soooo much. I still think I’m healing pretty dang well though. Yay