Some private stuff I need to write down without any reason:

Would it be a problem, if I’d want you to hug me? Without being a big deal? Of course it would. You are my teacher and not allowed to touch me in any way. And no, it’s not because I kinda like you more than I actually should. It’s much more. I completely trust you. Honestly. Normally I hate hugs! I hate any sort of physical touch! You know that. Take a second and think about how much I must trust you, if I WANT you to hug me. If I’m not afraid of your touch. While I’m afraid of anyone else’s.

I simply need someone’s warmth and unfortunately you are the only one who is able to give it to me… (which is kinda creepy ‘Cause you are my teacher, but let’s pretend all of us are just human. Equal humans.)

Maybe you don’t know HOW MUCH I trust you…
Maybe I’m too cold to you sometimes.
And I’m really really sorry about that.

May’ you can imagine that handling all of this stuff isn’t that easy. It hurts…


//9:58PM