Gently and tenderly, I brushed a strand of hair from her face and stroked her cheek. Then I laid a soft kiss on her forehead, like she was a fragile thing. But oh she was far from being fragile. She was so far from being fragile.
after 4 years breaking up finally I met you again yesterday I thought I’d be alright to see you again but no, all I can feel are just anger and sorrow I’m angry because I remember all what you’ve done to hurt me so bad, and I’m sad because I realize that I still have feelings for you and I couldn’t get you back
we began to fail at the smaller things.
like the time we went ice skating and realized that the imbalances in our lives weren’t just metaphorical.
you weren’t happy.
and I had given up hope in trying to be your safe place.
so we argued a lot.
mostly about stupid things.
then the importance of the wars we fought against each other only grew more significant in time.
you started lying, unintentionally perhaps, because you didn’t want to hurt me so you never told me about the day you ran into your ex girlfriend and decided to run around the city.
it wouldn’t have meant anything if you had told me.
and you didn’t.
eventually i found out.
and in my attempt to feel less hurt, i fell in love with someone else.
and i am sorry for how long it took for me to say that.
i am sorry for the both of us and how much we failed to realize.
the truth is, we should have known.
because there came a time where you stopped calling and wouldn’t hold your hand.
we overlooked these smaller things because even in the moments we were bad to each other, you wanted it to work as much as i did.
after all, it was you i shared dreams with.
we talked about marrying each other and never waking up beside other people.
eventually we did.
in time we ran out of dreams and the hope we harvested was left out in the rain for too long.
i am sorry that we weren’t kind to each other.
we should have been.
if i could go back in time, i would tell you this:
i may not love you anymore but there was a day where i did. thank you for trying as best as you could to love me in a way i was able to recognize. thank you for loving me in all my crookedness. thank you for being the one to share this with me.
You bring me to the edge of the earth and say
“look. it’s flat. it’s always been flat. the gods were wrong.
the gods made us as a mistake, we’re just machines that only play broken records, we’re just soft skinned monsters, tearing at each other like this was war from the beginning.
the gods still have fire, but they gave us a spark and that’s all we needed to burn down civilizations, that’s all we needed to light up the Library of Alexandria like it was nothing more than a handful of kindling, that’s all we needed to make torches and form mobs and scream "BURN HER BURN HER BURN HER.”
they gave us beauty, they pinned Aphrodite to a crucifix like she had to be sacrificed, but we turned it into some kind of joke, some kind of challenge, some kind of ruin, like there isn’t anyone born without a piece of her in their chest already.
they gave us love and we twisted it into hate, we turned hearts into barbed wire fences filled with old text messages we swear we’ll delete tomorrow night next week when we get over this, like this was ever something worth being stuck behind.
the gods gave us answers and we threw up questions, HAS ANYONE EVER ACTUALLY ESCAPED FROM THE LABYRINTH, HAS ANYONE EVER FOUND DAEDALUS AND BEGGED TO KNOW WHAT HE WAS THINKING WHEN HE SAW HIS SON FALL, HAS ANYONE EVER COME BACK FROM THE UNDERWORLD OR IS DEATH TOO ENCHANTING, DID HERA REALLY TURN HER BACK ON HEPHAESTUS BECAUSE HE WAS UNAPPEALING TO LOOK AT OR WAS IT SOMETHING ELSE HAS IT ALWAYS BEEN SOMETHING ELSE?
we ask ourselves why the gods stopped responding. we pretend we didn’t ignore them for years.
there is still something up there but it doesn’t want us anymore– lily rain
How can I forget the pain I endured,
The hole in my heart you never cured -
You tore my scars wide open
But I still see your eyes in the stars.
You’ve been gone for so long
That I don’t feel like I can go on for any longer.
You left me with anxiety, leaving me feeling guilty,
You claimed it was all my fault
Even though it was you who assaulted.
You laughed at my bruises and called me weak
You continued to batter me until I couldn’t even speak.
I gained a demon, but it was the my heart loved;
You were never kind to me and this torture has gone far enough.
Persona poem about someone in an abusive relationship | Written by: @jarfidd
i can tell when you’re asleep because the world gets so quiet. i can hear my own breath and see it in my exhales. we’ve been tired lately and it shows, we’ve been melting away with summertime concerts on warm grass and whiskey samples. and your eyes are getting baggy, love. you hate waking up but the sun isn’t shining so it’s fine. everything’s alright. it will be, baby. please believe me when i say i’ll try.
And I am not your home anymore. I am not the one you crawl back to when you’re feeling broken and alone. I am not your safe haven from stormy nights and cold mornings. I am not the place you turn to when the rest of the world shuts you out. You made a choice when you walked out that door and so I am not your home anymore.