Pi-Slices

9

Happy π Day, Tumblr!

This year, I got my very own apple pi to celebrate!  (Get it? 😁)

Pro tip:  Just like π is not a whole number, apple pi cannot be eaten whole.  Sitting on it does not help, either.  I recommend demanding your human cut your apple pi into more manageable slices.

Posts on: February 13th

Summary: Dean Winchester is in love with his best friend, a man he has never met, who goes by the handle AngelofThursday. Problem is, Thursday values his privacy and refuses to meet. Dean buries himself in his work at his bakery Slice of Pi and in computer games, desperately trying to move on from a man he can never have.

James Novak has problems of his own. Trying to cling onto what sense of security he can, he drifts around the city from café to coffee-shop to bar, using their wi-fi to keep his online footprint anonymous. He falls in lust with The Beautiful Man at his favourite coffee-shop, Study/Break, and turns to his best friend The_Michaelsword for advice.

A two-person love triangle for the digital age.

Keep reading for a sneak preview!

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Notting Hill ZimBits!AU

 6.5K word ZimBits AU based on the film Notting Hill. Bitty owns a Bakery/Bookstore, Jack is an NHL player. You don’t need to have seen the movie for this to make sense.

…   …   …

Bitty bought the bookstore with an inheritance left by his MooMaw. It does nothing to ease his feeling of loss, but every time he steps inside he is overcome by a feeling of rightness. That she would somehow approve of his bakery-bookshop combination. He hadn’t wanted to get rid of the books, and customers come in to relax and start reading something with their coffee and pie. They often walk out with a book as well as more pie. It won’t ever make him rich, but it does make him happy. 

He has his regulars, and then he has the people that work with him, and then he has the tourists that inundate the area every spring, summer and fall. So he gets by and makes enough to pay the mortgage on his little two-bedroom apartment a few blocks over, and he doesn’t feel like his life is lacking anything. Sometimes he wonders what it might be like to have someone to share everything with, but he’s had a couple of disastrous relationships and actually had to share everything, so he’s happy. Content.

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So I’ve been trying to come up with some October Batfamily headcanons, and what if Bruce took his family apple picking? Like he would just cram Dick, Jason, Cass, Tim, and Damian into this huge Dad Van™ and drive them all the way to Kansas to pick some apples. More specifically, the Kent family farm, where he gets a discount even though he’s a billionaire but everyone loves a good bargain. Anyways, just imagine poor Bruce being so done trying to force his kids to be normal functioning human beings for once. He is just walking around, whistling and picking apples, all the while doing his best to ignore what his hyperactive kids are doing behind him.

Like Dick is swinging around on all of the tree branches, doing these intricate flips and twirls, occasionally falling ten feet and crying for Bruce to save him. And then there’s Damian who found a worm on an apple and it touched his hand so he’s running around screaming and waving his contaminated hand in the air like a crazy person. Jason was jogging behind Dami, screaming at him to stop drop and roll, but then accidentally crashing into a horse that kicked him in the face so now he’s unconscious. Tim had found Kon and was sitting perched on his shoulders as he flew him around, throwing sticks at Cass as she ran around chucking pebbles at him like bullets. Just. Poor Broose. Somebody save him from his children’s antics. He seriously regrets ever thinking that getting even one sidekick was a good idea.

It’s even worse when they get home. First of all, they picked and purchased 400 apples. Why? Because they’re insane, that’s why. And second, Dick insisted that they all help out Alfred in the kitchen and bake every last apple into as many pies as they could make. Once again, insanity since not even they could eat all of those pies.

So there they are in the kitchen, poor Alfred having given up long ago before they’d even finished peeling more than a few apples. He was very smart to leave, as five siblings baking in the kitchen all at once was not a good idea. It’s remarkable how this family functions so well as superheroes, but so horribly at being a normal family that doesn’t create chaos wherever they go.

All around the room the fleet of teenage vigilantes is creating a giant mess of chaos. They got through about five pies, but then Tim sliced his finger with an apple peeler and started freaking out. He got a drop of blood on Damian’s arm, so the kid punched him in the face. Dick scolded him for punching his brother, but then Jason threw a sack of flour at him in frustration when Dick knocked his perfectly made dough on the floor. Dick then tackled him for getting flour in his eyes and, but as he knocked Jay to the ground they accidentally took Cass out with them, getting a whole bowl full of sticky ingredients in her hair. So Cass was chasing around Dick with a frying pan, Dick was trying to get Jason with a knife, Damian was riding Titus around like a war horse, and Tim was just curled in a ball on the floor sobbing over his boo boo.

Around midnight Bruce waltzes into the kitchen for some tea only to discover the biggest mess to ever be in Alfred’s spotless kitchen in Wayne history. They were all tangled in a pile on the floor, officially tuckered out after trying to murder each other for a couple hours. There were six pies on fire in the oven, several blobs of dough stuck to the ceiling, and pretty much the entire contents of the kitchen all over the floor, the counter, and his kids. Bruce doesn’t really even react at this point. He kind of just gives a long exhausted sigh, steps over the sleeping Batkids, and proceeds to make himself some tea, simply walking out when he was done. He’s just so tired and not even Superman could handle these kids at the moment. He does wish he hadn’t taken them apple picking, though. Yet another thing they are no longer allowed to do on family outings anymore.

Series Title: True Love Gave to Me

Chapter Title: Day 1 - Pie

Character: Patrick Sullivan from The Accidental Husband

Warnings: None, straight up fluff!

Photo/GIF credits go to the original maker/owner.

@averymerryspnxmas

The doors to the elevator nearly shut as I neared it, but thankfully a handsome man pushed them back open for me.

“Thank you!” I said, juggling two pie boxes and a bag of gifts.

“Not a problem. What floor?” The man asked, his Brooklyn accent thick, but not overly so.

“Sixth floor please.”

“Hey, are you going to Robin’s party?”

“Yeah, I’m a friend of hers.” I smiled.

“Hey, whaddya know? I’m a friend of Chris’,” he stuck his hand out, pausing when realized that mine were full.

“Oh shit, here, let me help ya.” He said, grabbing the pies from me. “I’m Patrick by the way.” He then held out a hand.

I grasped his, not able to stop the blush rising to my cheeks, “I’m Y/N. Nice to meet you Patrick.”

He smiled, “These smell delicious! What are they?” He asked, lifting the boxes to his nose and taking a whiff.

“A blueberry crisp pie and an apple crisp pie.”

“Oh man, I love pie!”
°°°°°°
The small party that Robin had thrown was quite the success. I spent most of my time talking and laughing with Patrick.

I was cutting the pies when Robin snuck up behind me, poking my side.

I jumped letting out a squeek, “The hell woman!?”

“I see you’re getting cozy with Patrick.” She said, wiggling her eyebrows.

I rolled my eyes, but smiled and continued to cut the pie, “I don’t know of the word is cozy.”

“Psftt, please! I’m telling you right now, Patrick just doesn’t touch and stand close to anyone. Trust me, cozy is the word.”

My insecurities were getting the best of me, “Yeah, but me of all people?”

Robin reached out and flicked my ear, “Don’t talk about yourself like that! You deserve to be happy, too ya know.”

“Ouch!” I rubbed my ear, “Fine, but don’t flick someone holding a knife.” I warned.

She shrugged, “Dually noted,”

“Hey! Is it time for pie yet?” Patrick asked, rubbing his hands together.

Robin and I laughed, “Yeah, plating it now.”

She took her and Chris a plate, while I carried two more plates to the table for the other guests.

Patrick waited in the kitchen, eyeballing the pies.

“Want a slice of each?” I asked him.

“Yes, please.”

I handed him his plate, forgoing my own. I didn’t want to indulge in front of him.

Taking a fork full of the apple, he promptly stuffed his mouth. Slapping his hand on the counter, he said, “This pie is fantastic!”

I laughed at his enthusiasm.

He chewed and swallowed, “Got any ice cream?”

“I do, actually.” I took out the half pint of vanilla and have him a hefty scoop.

He took a stab of blueberry and swooped it through some ice cream. Patrick moaned as he ate the bite, “So damn, delicious!”

The fork clinked on the plate as he took another stab of pie and ice cream. He held it up to me.

I shook my head, smiling, “No-”

“AH!” He admonished.

“Really-”

“AH!” Patrick refused to take no for an answer.

He put the fork up to my lips as I opened my mouth.

“Eh, see? Super duper, huh?” He asked, a big grin on his face.

I chewed, covering my mouth with my hand as I nodded.

I hopped up on the counter as he leaned near me. We finished off the slices of pie; Patrick taking a bite then feeding me one.

Once we were done, he put the plate in the sink, “So, Y/N. I was wondering if you’d go out with me Friday night?”

If I hadn’t been sitting, I would have fallen over. I looked at him incredulously, “Me?”

“Well yeah. I don’t see any other bombshell in here.”

I blushed, looking down at my fingers, “I- I’d love to.”

Patrick came up to me and offered his hand. He helped me down, putting his arm around my waist.

Giving me a warm smile, we went back to the living room.

The rest of the night, Patrick stayed by my side; his arm either around my shoulder or my waist, keeping me close to him.
°°°°°°
I stood by the door as Patrick put his jacket and scarf on.

“I’ll see you Friday at six?” He asked.

I bit my lip, nodding, “Yeah. It’s a date.”

Patrick smiled, cupping my cheek; his hand warm and soft.

He leaned forward as he tipped my head, gently placing his lips on mine.

The kiss was slow, so slow in fact that I wanted to melt into a puddle on the floor.

He pulled back slightly, our noses touching, “See you Friday, Gorgeous.”

Patrick placed one last peck to my lips, then left.

I watched as he got on the elevator, waving at him just as the doors closed.

For Jive

Written by @clockworkseraph for @jiveammunition


Christmas, Gabriel figured, was just another day when you were a soldier, super enhanced or not. Stuck at where they were, it wasn’t exactly a cozy little winter wonderland.

At least the food tended to better this time of year, roasted turkey and stuffing replacing the plain old chicken breasts and steamed vegetables. Not to mention the pies, slices large enough to satisfy even his own large sweet tooth.

Working on his third slice, this one chocolate pecan, Gabriel brushed crumbs off the file he was reading to his new charge. Recently inducted into the program, Gabriel had taken one Jack Morrison under his wing, the skinny little blond taking surprisingly quickly to the rigorous environment.

“-So, they want us to work on your accuracy, but believe that with the next round of injections your speed can be- Jack!”

Snapping out of it, Jack jumped, nearly upturning his mess tray before turning to Gabriel with a sheepish smile.

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Reed & Roden’s Slice of Pi Value

Do you have 11 protons? Cause you’re sodium fine. 

If i was an enzyme, i’d be DNA helicase so i could unzip your genes.

Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you’re CuTe.

We have great chemistry, lets do some biology.

I must be a diamond now, because you just gave me a hardness of 10.

Baby you’ve definitely got potential, my place would be a great place to convert it to kinetic.

I wanna stick to u like glue-cose. 

Even if there wasn’t gravity on earth, I’d still fall for you. 

Does your body consist of Oxygen and Neon? Because you are the ONe.

I wanted to make a good chemistry joke, but all the good one Argon.

I tried to make a joke about Sodium, but Na.

This girl I’ve been talking to. I want to hold her closer and more tightly than a covalent bond. Damn.

Hey babe, if you were a vehicular fluid, you’d be ethylene glycol, because you’re sweet and I melt when you’re around.

You must be made of Uranium and Iodine, because all I see is U and I.

I have recently discovered a very rare element called Beautium. I looks like you are made of it.

Let’s get married and live a life like monosaccharides-sweet and simple.

Are you a carbon sample? Because I want to date you.