C: Today I witnessed some of the most idiotic shit ever in my life. One of my great aunts literally went off on my cousin due to her not finishing a corner of a hamburger. Like, the girl ate most of her food, so what’s the point of finishing off a little bit of burger if she’s full? And my aunt’s like, oh if she’s full then she won’t want this cupcake. Like of course she wants it. Any kid that is full literally always has room for dessert. But anyway, she went crazy and I got so pissed off at everyone involved. Like idk, but why do black people – mainly the older generations – just assume yelling and hitting is gonna make shit go away? Like all that drama caused me to have a panic attack, shaking and hyperventilating and they brushed that off as a joke too. Like damn, guess I can’t have any problems either. Shit annoys me.

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Skull-canon: Skelebros as parents.

Requested by Anonymous.

UT!Sans: Sans is… surprisingly good at discipline? He practically raised Papyrus, so he has a lot of practice in the parenting department. Consistency is the key with kids, and he is about as consistent as it gets. He seems lazy from an outsider’s point of view, but he’s there for every play, every concert, every award ceremony. He does tend to spoil the kid a bit, always buying them things he thinks they’d like, but it never gets too out of hand. He’s also super good at helping out with homework. The only thing he’s a bit bad at is playtime, though he makes up for it with literally everything else. Overall, he’s probably the best parent out of the lot, and his s/o doesn’t have much to worry about.

UT!Papyrus: His child is the best child in the world, no doubt about it in his mind. They’re a superhero, a prince/ss, a pirate, a racecar driver. CoolDad98 reporting for duty. He’s really great with imaginative playtime, creating spaceships out of boxes and flying to the moon with his kid. The only thing is, he’s a bit of a pushover. His s/o will have to be the firm parent, otherwise, this kid could get away with murder.

US!Sans: Extracurricular activities. He’s a soccer mom, that’s for sure. He’s so involved in his kid’s life it’s sort of hard to separate them. He plays with them and spoils them rotten, but he has a surprisingly good discipline strategy. The trouble is that he acts so much like a friend that the kid is going to have trouble seeing him as a dad and an authority figure. His s/o is going to have to help him draw the line between friendship and parenthood.

US!Papyrus: He’s a pretty laid-back dad. He’s good at helping out with homework and science projects, but don’t bother asking him for help with playtime. He’ll just lay down and pretend to be the floor or something like that. He’s one of those parents who would pretty much agree to let their kid do anything. He trusts them to not get into too much trouble. If they do get into trouble though, he reverts to not letting them get away with anything. His s/o will have to help him keep balanced.

UF!Sans: He was never prepared for fatherhood. He knows he did something wrong with Papyrus, so he’s super careful with the kid. If he ever gets angry with them he literally teleports away to calm down because of how scared he is to hurt them. Because of this, his discipline can seem kind of weak. It’s going to take a lot to break down those barriers, and it will be very hard for him to do anything with the kid. He just feels so inadequate. Goodness does he love his child though. They’ll probably end up sleeping between him and his s/o for a long time, and those mornings and nights are the softest. His s/o has a lot of work to do, but it’ll be worth it.

UF!Papyrus: His child is his protege, his heir. Their schedule is strict and they probably know it as well as he does with how he sticks to it. Wake up, breakfast, school, training. His standards are so high, in fact, that his kid will have problems reaching all of his goals. His s/o will need to remind him that the kid is imperfect, just like them, and get him to relax a bit. He just wants the best for them, but he’s a bit too enthusiastic about it.

solointhesand  asked:

How are Minky and Squishy's personalities different? How are they similar?

They’re definitely pretty distinctive kiddos, even at this point. Squishy is way more physical - he’s a climber, a bigger risk taker, and just in general a little more intense in his energy. He’s also way more of a cuddler. Minky tends to be more methodical and cautious, and he was definitely more even-tempered at this age. He’s super-inquisitive and verbal, which we’ll see how Squishy ends up being when he gets more communicative. They’re both super-curious, both love animals, both are (generally) very happy/friendly/goofy. It’ll be pretty interesting to see how they continue to grow (apart and alike!).

Vanity post because it’s my birthday! Not bad for 35. A year ago I was mega pregnant and working at a job I hated with the state. Now I’ve got a part-time gig with an excellent organization, and a cute kid, and while I’m not getting rich, I’m getting by, and I’m happy, which is the most important part. (Couldn’t have quit that soul-sucking state job without the ACA, BTW, so thanks Obama for allowing some moms professional flexibility.) I didn’t hit my goal weight by today but I’ll kick that can down the road to my kid’s birthday in August which would be more of a milestone anyway and who cares anyway because I feel that I look 👍.

35! Wow! I feel like I just adjusted to being 30.

Untuk Anak Perempuan 20+

28.06.2017

“Kamu juga mau?”
Tanya Bapak yang menjadi langganan bekam di rumah.

“Mau, Pak, hehe.”
Jawab saya nyengir sambil mendekat ke arah Bapak bekam.

Saya ingin mengikuti adik yang habis periksa kesehatan dengan menggunakan aliran darah dan menekan saraf inti. Beberapa penyakit dari yang parah sampai yang masih gejala mampu terdeteksi. Allahu'alam.

Pertama-tama yang dilakukan Bapak bekam adalah memeriksa denyut nadi, menekan satu persatu jari di tangan kanan, lalu pindah ke betis, kemudian kembali menekan jari yang ada di kaki kanan. Kalau merasa sakit, berarti terdapat penyakit.

Salah satu yang membuat saya tertegun adalah paru-paru. Menurut Bapak bekam, paru-paru saya, tepatnya pada bagian pena terdapat kotoran yang cukup banyak dan mampu menyumbat peredaran. Otomatis saya tanyakan apakah berbahaya sekali? Apa yang menjadi penyebab dan bagaimana menanggulanginya?

Untuk saat ini, hal tersebut adalah gejala, yang bisa segera dicegah. Dengan menjaga pola makan yang teratur, tidur yang cukup, olahraga, dan gunakan masker setiap kali berkendara khususnya bagi kita yang sedang berdomisili di kota besar.

“Tapi, kotoran atau racun yang masuk kedalam paru-paru tidak hanya lewat udara, tapi juga apa yang kita makan dan apa yang kita dengar. Makanya, lebih sering dengar yang baik-baik ya, Fin.” Nasehat si Bapak bekam.

“Berarti kalau dengar lagu-lagu gitu gak baik ya, Pak.” Tanya saya memastikan.

“Oiya, jelas.” Tegas beliau menjawab

“Tuh, kakak sering dengar lagu-lagu hitz gitu kan, kak. Dikurangin, kaaaak. Banyakin murotal aja, haha.” Kali ini adik ikut menimpali sambil setengah mengejek kiranya.

Tapi setelah saya pikir. Apa yang adik saya kata ada benarnya juga. Rasanya kurang saya setel musik-musik baik yang masuk kedalam telinga saya. Terlebih pergaulan saat ini seakan menuntut untuk terus update apa pun. Aih, lingkungan. Aih, zaman. Aih, anak muda. Hehe.

Baiklah. Mulai saat ini, mari kita perkaya mendengarkan musik-musik baik, seperti murotal. Tidak hanya sebelum tidur, tapi sesering mungkin. Hehe, saya juga belum coba sih sesering mungkin ini bagaimana. Tapi gak ada salahnya kita coba bersama.

Agar menjadi persiapan. Persiapan untuk masa depan dan hari tua yang lebih sehat. Sehat itu pilihan, cuy. Kita yang tentukan.

Khususnya buat kita perempuan, perempuan yang lingkungannya tidak homogen, yang tidak sepenuhnya bernuansa ‘relegi’ dengan sebutan ‘ukhti akhi’, masih penuh hingar bingar dunia yang tak jarang dipandang buruk oleh orang yang mengaku baik.

Kita harus memiliki prinsif. Sebab dari kita, perempuan, akan lahir sebuah peradaban. Jadi, ada baiknya, bagi kita yang Muslim/ Muslimah, memulainya sejak dini. Supaya kalimat yang pertama dan sering didengar oleh bayi kita kelak adalah kalimat indah, ayat-ayat Allah.

Yok! Semangat!!!
(Calon) ibu-ibu, kita pasti bisa. LOL!

***

“Umur segini, perhatikan pola hidup, nak. Karena akan jadi kebiasaan. Kebiasaan begadang dan lain-lain, kurangi yaa. Pakai kosmetik juga gak usah aneh-aneh. Apalagi kalau lagi hamil, gak usah pakai zat-zat kimia. Belajar..,” pesan Mama malam ini.

Siap, Ma. Laksanakan! Insya Allah 😅

How to talk to your daughter about her body, step one: Don’t talk to your daughter about her body, except to teach her how it works.

Don’t say anything if she’s lost weight. Don’t say anything if she’s gained weight.

If you think your daughter’s body looks amazing, don’t say that. Here are some things you can say instead:

“You look so healthy!” is a great one.

Or how about, “You’re looking so strong.”

“I can see how happy you are – you’re glowing.”

Better yet, compliment her on something that has nothing to do with her body.

Don’t comment on other women’s bodies either. Nope. Not a single comment, not a nice one or a mean one.

Teach her about kindness towards others, but also kindness towards yourself.

Don’t you dare talk about how much you hate your body in front of your daughter, or talk about your new diet. In fact, don’t go on a diet in front of your daughter. Buy healthy food. Cook healthy meals. But don’t say, “I’m not eating carbs right now.” Your daughter should never think that carbs are evil, because shame over what you eat only leads to shame about yourself.

Encourage your daughter to run because it makes her feel less stressed. Encourage your daughter to climb mountains because there is nowhere better to explore your spirituality than the peak of the universe. Encourage your daughter to surf, or rock climb, or mountain bike because it scares her and that’s a good thing sometimes.

Help your daughter love soccer or rowing or hockey because sports make her a better leader and a more confident woman. Explain that no matter how old you get, you’ll never stop needing good teamwork. Never make her play a sport she isn’t absolutely in love with.

Prove to your daughter that women don’t need men to move their furniture.

Teach your daughter how to cook kale.

Teach your daughter how to bake chocolate cake made with six sticks of butter.

Pass on your own mom’s recipe for Christmas morning coffee cake. Pass on your love of being outside.

Maybe you and your daughter both have thick thighs or wide ribcages. It’s easy to hate these non-size zero body parts. Don’t. Tell your daughter that with her legs she can run a marathon if she wants to, and her ribcage is nothing but a carrying case for strong lungs. She can scream and she can sing and she can lift up the world, if she wants.

Remind your daughter that the best thing she can do with her body is to use it to mobilize her beautiful soul.

—  Sarah Koppelkam

Shout out to all my father figures who took on the roles that my father couldn’t/chose not to

Father figures who step up for other people’s children are so strong and underappreciated

Mentors, step parents, kind neighbors, older siblings, friends, uncles, grandparents, and all the moms who’s feet didn’t quite fit the shoe but wore them anyways to fill that void

Thank you for giving us a reason to celebrate this Father’s Day

On a scale from “refuses to understand even when the situation is blindingly obvious because you exist only to obstruct and dismay” to “totally supportive even when the situation is so deranged that a responsible guardian really should be freaking out”, what kind of YA fantasy parental figure would you be?

So I’m 27. Not married, not dating and no children. I’m the last in my family to not have kids and everyone is looking at me like “does your vagina even work?” I am however the first in my family to get a college degree and after graduating with a BA in Journalism, I went to a pristine (highly overpriced) hair school and became a licensed cosmetologist. They’re always telling me “you’re so pretty. Hair and makeup is always fabulous so why can’t you find a nice black man and have babies?”

You know, sexy comes in all colors. I’m not gonna be restricted to my own race just because every woman in my family brought home a black man. I don’t want children now either. I’d rather buy high heels than diapers. My career is on the move and I’m not gonna stop making money just so I can be barefoot and pregnant in someone’s kitchen.

Why can’t they just understand?